"It's raining, how Dickensian." Cam muttered. She made her way down the plane steps
Joe asked walking behind her carrying the bags. "What babe? Did you make a sex joke?"
She sighed glancing back. "As in Charles Dickens all his writings are morose and dire."
"Still lost." He said stepping off the plane.
She grins at his blank expression as she walked to the waiting car. "It's a good thing you're pretty Joe. I'm saying the weather matches my mood and our Tiny Tim like situation."
He chuckled. "You just called me stupid, in your I'm a nice girl way didn't you?"
"I'm a nice girl way?" Her eyebrows rose in question as he opened the car door and she slid down the seat
"You know when you tell Nikki her dress is pretty but what you really mean is you look like a two dollar hooker and I can see those fake titties from space." She answered getting him behind her and closing the door as she doubled over laughing.
The driver already knowing the destination, takes off.
After catching her breath she responded. "Well you can! They're like over inflated basketballs! You aren't stupid baby, I'm sorry I'm just stressed."
He grinned leaning in to kiss her temple. "It's okay, it made you laugh. If it makes you feel better there's no way those things feel real. Take a real rack over plastic any day."
"Wait! When she runs please tell me they hit her in the face." She said being momentarily catty.
"They don't move, what I noticed, they're fake but they're there I ain't blind." He justified.
-/-/-/-/=
A hush falls over them as they pull up to the hospital. "Ready Babe?" Joe offered her his hand.
"Not really." She took his hand. The light squeeze is meant to convey "I give you strength." She knows that. "But I was never given a choice. Let's go." She finished.
She exits the car never letting him go. She walks a little ahead of him in a backless red jumpsuit her hair up in a ponytail. She looks so regal even in total exhaustion. He snaps a picture because here in the florescent light sweeping through the sliding glass doors into the night it's like she's a battered princess leading him into battle.
She makes it single mindedly through the lobby and into the elevator before her breath hitches in her lungs. The anger floods into her heart and falls from her eyes in the form of tears. He knows she'd thought this would be easy because it was their second home in a sick way but he knows she's stopped short by the happy beat of Magic's Rude in the elevator. It's at odds with the setting and situation.
He stopped the elevator and pulled her into his arms. She cried into his chest. "I thought he was okay. I thought I could let him be for second. I'm not sure I have another fight in me Joe."
I know baby. But we gotta try. We ALL have to try." He whispered into the hair on the crown of her head.
She finishes her crying jag. "You're right I'm good let's go." He pulls the stop release still holding on to her.
When they stop outside Luca's room she wiped her eyes squared her shoulders and opened the door. She shot Luca the brightest smile he'd ever seen. He can see over her shoulder. Luca isn't the only one dazzled by it. John seems a little knocked back by it. "Welcome to my world Dude." He thought.
"Hi bubba!" She said in greeting.
"Mom! Despite the pallor of his skin and the tiredness in his eyes the boy lights up!
"Scooch your butt baby of mine. I'm laying down with you." She said kicking off her shoes. She patently ignored Nikki's odd stare and climbed in. "That thing you did? It was sweet but never again clear?"
"10-4 Mom." He nodded an affirmative.
"OK. You need to be honest. How long had you felt bad without saying anything?" She inquired propped up on her elbow head resting in her hand.
"Two weeks." He replied flatly in his unvarnished childlike truthful way.
"How'd you know to ask that?" Nikki asked.
"He's a Cena its simple math." She replied John couldn't help the small smirk that graced his face. "I can feel you smirking John. Don't encourage pigheaded behavior."
"Did you have a good trip?" Luca asked. He thought a subject change might be needed.
She leant down and kissed his cheek. "I did. Missed you though and you saved Joe from accidently taking me to a gay bar. I was going to let him figure out the Ramrod thing for himself. How're you feeling?"
"Eight out of ten on the craptastic scale. Dialysis should help; I only have to do it once a week the kidney still functions just not well." He answered smartly and the all felt their own pangs of sadness.
"I'll see if they'll let us outpatient it. No promises." Cam kissed the top of his head. "I'm so sorry baby." She spoke into his hair.
"Nothing to be sorry for Mama it's not your fault. It's the cards we're dealt right. "He said and she had to fight back tears. "Joe did Mom like the ancient Greece stuff?"
He shrugged his wide shoulders. "She mostly picked on me when I couldn't fit on the bus."
"Hey I liked it! Hush Lurch!" She teased back.
"Did you guys take pictures?" Nikki asked. Cam nodded. For a moment it was like they were normal family.
"We all know Joe takes more selfies than a tween girl." John teased.
"Uh huh, you'd know all about tween girls franchise boy." Joe shot back halfheartedly.
"Now Dads..." Luca teased. "You're not setting a very good example." He pointed out.
The two men laughed but the doctor walked in cutting the moment short. The men were leaned on opposite walls and Nikki sat on Luca's right and Cam laid on his left they were all frozen. The imperfectly perfect moment ruined like harbinger of doom.
"Luca the Candy stripers are showing the newest Captain America, they can roll you down to the child life room in your bed to watch if you want." Dr. Phelps said a soft kindness in his eyes. "Theater sized screen and popcorn the whole shebang. " He encouraged.
"Awesome."
"Okay I'm going to steal your entourage a moment and return them to you shortly." He said as Cam got to her feet and filed out last behind John. A nurse passed them going into take Luca to the theatre room.
-/-/-
They all stand in the office with its funky smell making their stomachs churn. "You should all sit."
"We'll stand." Cam and John say in unison.
The doctor nods and forges on."I can put Luca on a permanent dialysis plan which will prolong his life five to ten years with the aggressiveness of his condition or we can go a more severe risky route and get him to 25 maybe 35 but that last number is pie in the sky."
"How severe and risky?" Nikki asked for everyone.
"I want to do a bone marrow transplant using John's marrow." Dr. Phelps provided an answer.
"So that John's stem cells can trick Luca's body into thinking the kidney is inside its original host." Cam finished.
"Where's the risk? Bone marrow transplants are common place now." Joe said.
"They'll have to knock out his immune system to accept my bone marrow. That means chemo which damages all organs not just his kidney." John said. "My brother had cancer." He said softly to the surprised glance of the doctor.
"And He could still reject or have host verses graft disease and with all the fluids you'll pump into him between blood products and medications it puts pressure on the kidney."Cam added. She'd done some research on the plane.
"I will leave you all to decide Luca's course of treatment and see to Luca." The doctor stepped out.
"That's rough news." Joe sighed, the situation hitting him.
"The question is do we do the thing that prolongs his life significantly and chance damage to his system or do we prolong it shortly and give him a less painful end?" Cam said collapsing into an arm chair.
"Why're you so ready to give up now Cam?" John asked suddenly shocked that the air had gone out of Cam's sails.
"I'm not John. I just- we can't be selfish, He'll die too young either way we go." She answered staring at her feet as she mentioned his inevitable death.
"He's miserable on dialysis." Joe points out. He comes around to sit on the arm of Cam's chair and hold her hand.
"Chemo is more miserable and he'll be confined to isolation." Nikki said. "What I googled." She answered their surprised expressions.
"We should ask him what he wants to do." Cam said.
"He wants to stay with you Babe. He's afraid to leave you." Joe said.
"John?" Nikki pushed.
"Cam's right we consider his wants first. It's his body."
"I'm gonna go get the bags out of the car." Joe cleared his throat obviously fighting off tears. He got to his feet and hurried to the door.
"Joe Honey…" Cam pleads.
"I'm fine baby I just need a second." And he was gone.
"I'll go get coffee." Nikki said quickly excusing herself.
-/-/-
"Come on let me have it. You know you want too." John said as Cam got to her feet.
"You're right but I'm too goddamned tired for your shit!" She starts to leave but turns back. "We're you out of your mind?" He's ten! I had a right to know the second it happened! Did you do it out of spite? I'll just fuck up Cam's world for shits and giggles? How dare you! I swear to God you do that again and he no longer belongs to you I will take him from you that's a promise! I don't wanna hear your reasons or shitty ass excuses! I want you to for once in your life be his fucking father! That's why I trusted you to keep him. Learned my lesson didn't I?" She railed at him.
John stood there as Campbell laid into him. He had no snappy come back, no excuse, nothing to say. She was right and completely justified in her outburst. He felt like she could have laid into him more, pushed him, punched him, something. Anything to allow him to continue to be her sounding board for as long as she needed to let it out. He knew he was stepping on hot coals but all that he could think to do was reach out for her and bring her tightly into his broad chest, allowing her to cry. He held her close, arms wrapped around her frame, shirt absorbing her tears. John felt his own eyes prick and he closed them slowly allowing them to mist up.
"I'm sorry." Was all he whispered.
"I know that but it doesn't help."
"Nothing you can do changes where we're at Cam. He's sick we fix it again, again, and again." He said voice thick from holding back his tears.
"What if he chooses not to fight John?" She said it so quiet he barely heard it even with her in his arms.
"He will."
"You don't him like I do; he might not… right now he feels cheated." She said in motherly intuition.
He squeezed her in hug. "You have never loved you. I have, trust me that's worth fighting toward, I wasn't smart enough too but he's smarter than me."
She said stepping from his embrace before it could feel familiar or comfortable. "I'm scared. I don't know how to live without him."
"You won't I think the one and only thing I gave was his stubborn will. He'll make it, He's got your brains, and smart money says he fights because he's all he knows. He wouldn't know how to die."
Cam sighs and looked up at John. "I'm going to see if he's back."
John nodded. "I'll go see if Joe or Nikki needs help."
-/-/-/-
"You didn't stay to finish Captain America Winter Solider? What's the world coming too?" Cam said climbing back in bed with Luca. She pulls him so he's curled up practically on top of her. Campbell notices Nikki at the door, Luca paying no mind to the small crowd. She quickly sees Nikki pull Joe and John back from the doorway, mouth moving but hearing nothing. "Me and you we gotta talk about what's next."
"You have three choices." She said as he reached over and petted his hand down her cheek.
"You have a tan and you smell like the sea." He said sounding sleepy.
"I do?" Cam asked smiling
"It's nice like you brought the ocean back with you. What's option one?" Her eyes fluttered closed as he stroked his thumb down the line of her nose. He'd done this since he was a baby. He liked to stroke some random part of her body until he fell asleep sometimes it was her hair, or her arm. Today it was her face.
"Dialysis."
"No." He said plainly.
"A bone marrow transplant to kick start your body into thinking the kidney is back in Dad's body. You'd have to do chemo. It'll make you feel crummy." She laid out the next option and he twisted her hair in his fingers.
"Will my hair fall out?" He yawned.
"It might, Joe will shave his head John too." She said trying to be honest but not scare him.
"You like Joe's hair." He states softly.
"I like you more." She smirked.
"That awkward moment when he checks mid match to make sure no one ripped it out cause Mama likey is funny. I'd miss it." He said giving her a tired almost drunken looking smile.
Cam laughed but trudged on the last option might kill her but she had to give it. "Option three is we go home and let nature take its course…if you are too tired to fight I understand I won't be mad. Watching do all of this and still be you? Nothing will ever make me prouder Luca John. There's no shame in choosing to let go if you need too. I will be alright." She said tears brimming her eyes but her voice was steady as he tucked his head under her chin to drift off to sleep.
"Can I think about it?" He said barely awake.
"Yeah babe, you can."
When she looks up again Luca's sleeping soundly his head on her shoulder. She notes that Joe, John, and Nikki are standing on the other side of the glass partitioned wall. They all look solemn and teary but John seems to have been crying hardest his face splotchy. Nikki's mascara has tracked down her face it oddly makes her seem softer. Joe's eyes are red but he sends her a reassuring wink.
She exhaled thinking "Okay God it's on you."
AN: I own nothing but Cam and Luca, Alport's is a real disease as are all the treatments though some is embellished for story purposes. If you liked it please review even if it's only to say you hate me for going dark again! Thanks a ton!-MM