Undone in this Mad Season

Chapter Fourteen

"Don't think I forgot the stunt you pulled," Logan said as he followed Maxie into her kitchen.

She poured some drinks for them and purposely ignored what he had said.

He crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned against the counter. "Don't you ever try and fix my relationship with my father again. Keep your nose out of it, where it belongs."

Maxie passed him a glass.

Logan leaned close to her, doing his best to keep his expression stern but her eyes danced with amusement and made it near impossible for him to stay angry. "Understand?"

"Get over yourself, why don't you? You think you can command me to do anything and that's gonna work?" She laughed. "Its your own fault that I sent him there. You needed a kick in the ass so you would talk to him again."

"How would you feel if I went out and found Frisco. Then sent him here to knock on your door?"

"You don't know a thing about Frisco. Don't even try and compare the two. Your dad didn't even know you were born. Mine held me. Had the chance to love me and then found something better to do. He's not gonna knock on my door like Scott knocked on yours and do you want to know why? He don't give a damn. So this big pity party over Scott thinking you were the Text Message Killer,

go have it somewhere else, okay?"

"Thanks for the support."

He wondered what she would do if he did walk out the door and never look back. But there was no way he would do that now. He'd tried to get by without her and all she did was consume his thoughts, his dreams and his heart even more than usual.

He couldn't imagine wanting to find a different chick to spend time with. No one woman would be who Maxie was to him. She was the match, he was the wood and together they were pure fire. If he was gonna go down in flames for anyone, he had known since the moment he saw it, it would be for her.

Still the way she tried to run his life drove him nuts.

Logan asked "So I should just let his ass off the hook for thinking I'm a serial killer? Sorry, Max, but I ain't that guy."

"Sure it sucks he thought that about you, Logan. It blows. But at least you know your dad thought about you at all. That is more than I can say for Frisco. If I didn't have Mac...I would be an orphan. Because Frisco and Felicia might as well be dead for all they are to me. So you think about that the next time you think about writing Scott off. He may be the worst father in the whole freaking world in your eyes but he is trying. He's here. That's more than Felicia or Frisco can pull off. Besides, the sooner you deal with him then sooner you can move back to Port Charles."

Every time she said the words move back he felt fear flutter through his brain like a lost moth. He wanted to be all she wanted. He just didn't think he was ready yet. And he didn't think he could stall much longer either. "Careful, your neediness is showing."

Her eyes cut into his. "You're a real asshole, Hayes. Just get out. You've went from saving the day to giving me a migraine in five minutes. That's a record, even for you." She stomped out of the kitchen, while throwing over her shoulder, "I don't really give a shit if you ever move back."

Letting out a long sigh, Logan jogged after Maxie, grabbed her wrist and spun her around. "Don't go being all sensitive now."

She jerked away from him. "I don't need you."

But she did and they both knew it. He wanted to make it work between them, to make her happy, to make all the pain and struggle of the last year worth it in the end, but he didn't know that he could be all that to her. It was easier to keep her at a distance, even though the moment she got away from him he started to go even crazier than he was when she was around.

"I shouldn't have made that crack," he told her.

"You think you're special to me or something? You're not! You are just the last link I have to Cooper. Wake up, Hayes. I'm using you."

Slice. Like a knife carving its way along his collarbone she made her mark on him. And though he knew what she was doing and he knew why, having that knowledge didn't stop it from hurting him.

His words were lifeless when he asked "Using me how?"

Maxie went on "As long as you are around, its like Coop is here.And if Coop is here then I know I'm safe. I'm loved. Because he knew how to love me right. And I...I...would have kept you around just for that reason but know what? You've bored me. So get out and go to hell while you are at it!" she screamed, with tears streaming down her face. "Cause if I am strong enough to survive watching my sister get buried then I am sure as hell strong enough to get by just freaking fine without you here. Why are you still here? Just go. Go! Go! Go!"

She pushed at his chest. He grabbed both her hands in his. Then his lips crashed down on hers. For the first time ever, their kiss wasn't filled with lust or wasn't part of a tease or a game. It was soft and tender and a million different apologizes that neither could ever say any other way.

When he pulled away he asked her "Do you really think I'm going anywhere this time? No matter where I live...that don't change this...it don't change what's between you and me. We ain't never gonna be perfect or treat each other sweet all the time...but I'm not looking to go be sane but wrong with someone else. I want to be crazy...and right...with you."

Her eyes searched his and she took in short shallow breaths. She warned him, with her voice shaking, "I will ruin you in the end."

"You can't ruin me. I was ruined long before you ever met me, Max."

Her fingers grasped his shirt, her trembling hands twisted the fabric. She was a pile of contradictions, pulling him close just to push him away again. Her eyes and lips and tears saying she needed him in her life more than she needed anyone else. But her words yelling just the opposite. Still he knew that beneath all that, beneath her snarky smile, she was just trying to stay upright in a world that had knocked her off her feet too many times to count. She could have asked some other guy to be the one to hold her up, and plenty would have been glad to take the job, but she wanted him. But the moment it felt like she had him, Maxie started looking for excuses why it would never work.

If she piled up all her excuses now, she wouldn't be surprised later when they imploded again. That is what she told herself. She had to lean on him, it felt too good to be with him, too right, too safe. But she couldn't pretend this was forever.

Nothing's forever. Not in her life. Still she had this moment right now. She had him for right now. And there was no denying that the rapid beat of her heart was all about him, no one else, and nothing else, but the way it felt to have her body pressed to his. Her lips found his, and their kiss was a duel for control. His hands buried themselves in her hair.

Logan whispered "You do need me. Admit it."

He kissed her again before she could say a word. Then he whispered again. "Admit it, Max. Say you need me."

More kisses. Short and intense. Then long and filled with scorching heat. "Admit it," he repeated, while staring into her eyes.

"Don't push you luck," she said with a smile. She took a step back, with a devious twinkle in her eye. "You're lucky I let you hang around me at all."

"You're gonna admit it...just you wait and see. Cause you're crazy about me. And I'm stubborn enough to not let up till you say it aloud."

"Well, good luck with that."

He grabbed her hand and pulled her back to him, while she let out a happy laugh, and then his lips were on hers again. They tumbled onto the couch.

Later she asked "So what is this? We just make out now? Cause I certainly don't remember eating any big fancy dinner at the Metro Court today. Don't you know you have to feed a girl before you feel her up?"

"Now she gets picky. Fine. You want to go to dinner?"

"Like I would date you."

Laughing he said "Okay. Have it your way. You'll be saving me some dough." He tried to kiss her and she stopped him.

Maxie said "I won't ever date you...never...or kiss you...or anything with you." Her eyes challenged his "You know that thing you like so much that I do so well? I won't be doing that...until you move home."

"Texas is where I call home, darlin'," he lied. Because saying You're my home was just too sappy for him to let pass over his lips. Maybe some other time. Maybe when he was sunk deep inside her...but for now he couldn't bare that much of his soul to her.

"Yeah, we'll see about that," she said with a smile. Then she walked over to the door and opened it. "Enjoy your nice long drive home and your nice cold shower alone. If you need the number for a moving company, give me a call."

Logan walked out the door. "You think this is gonna work but..."

"Oh, its gonna work. Nighty night. And when you dream of me...make sure you dress me in a cute outfit. I don't wear off the rack even in fantasies."

The door closed in his face, leaving him there aching for her, and shaking his head at the way she always managed to turn his world upside down.

But he wouldn't complain. Not anymore. Because at least now he didn't have to fight anyone to be at the top of her list, and he didn't have to wonder if she'd find something better with some other guy, and he didn't have to think about what it would be like to spend the rest of his life never able to touch her again.

They might not have it all worked out. But at least they were getting closer to being on the same page.