Sorry for the late updates last week. This one is extra long to make it up(:
Jace
"Can you get the phone, Jace?" Mom hollered through the wall. "My hands are full with the laundry."
"Sure thing." I dragged myself to the kitchen, leaned against the counter, and grabbed the phone. Probably a commercial, like always. "No, we don't want to buy it," I snarled automatically.
There was a moment of hesitation on the other line. "Could I speak to Jace Wayland please?" A queer, low voice said. It was low, but not manly low, yet it was obviously not a woman.
"This is he." And just who the hell are you?
The other person breathed out a breath of relief, and a familiar voice came on. "Oh, good. It's you. I thought it was your father."
Jocelyn Fray.
My eyebrows flew up. For her to call my house must've taken a lot of courage, considering what she told me.
"You have good grammar, by the way," she said.
I laughed. "Thanks."
"Who's that?" Mom poked her head around the wall.
Oh, crap. "My girlfriend," I lied, using the first instinct that came to mind. Then regretted it. It hurt to say those words.
My mom nodded understandingly and she backed away. I could bet that her ear was pressed against the wall, listening in. I raised the phone to my ear again. "Sorry 'bout that."
"Did you just call me your girlfriend?" Jocelyn laughed.
My ears burned. "What'd you call for?" I mumbled.
Her laughter faded. "It's about Clary."
My pulse raced. "Is she alright?"
A pause. "She's decided to transfer to the School of the Arts."
Suddenly, I felt dizzy. The phone hit the ground, which came rushing up to me.
I couldn't believe it. She was transferring to a school hundreds of miles away from me?
Mom rushed in to find me slumped on the ground, staring blankly at the brown cabinets. I was too tired to yell at her for secretly listening. She knelt next to me, murmuring, "It's just a girl, Jace. You should know. There's so many others."
Just a girl. How many times had I said that to myself already?
"But I don't want them. I only want Clary."
Mom stiffened slightly. I guess she'd never expected me to say that. Months ago, neither would I.
"Why does it hurt this much?" My voice cracked. "If she's just a girl, why does it hurt thisdamnmuch?"
There was such a pained expression on her face that my throat closed up.
I swallowed thickly, my throat burning. I hadn't cried since I was a little boy.
"Oh, Jace," she sighed. "This is what love feels like."
Love?
This was what love felt like?
All those times with Clary came rushing into my mind. How she made me feel, how jumbled my thoughts were when I was near her, how I felt like I could die happy when kissing her. Just being by her made me happy.
That was love, wasn't it?
But Valentine, he'd never loved Mom. That was why this was what love felt like to her. Loving someone who would never love her back.
My eye twitched, and I swiped it. I heard my mom catch her breath.
"It's just an itch." I swore inwardly. Myvoice.
Mom wrapped her arms around me, hesitantly at first, and when I didn't resist, pulled me to her chest, like the old days after Valentine had beat me. I felt something wet drop in my hair, and I knew she was crying.
My throat burned like hell. My eyes stung.
And finally, after being bottled up for years, I cried. For Clary, for my cowardness of Valentine, and for my mom.
…
Clary
Downstairs the phone was ringing nonstop. I waited for my mom to pick it up, but it kept on blasting away. Growling, I stomped down the stairs, ready to punch a hole in the wall. As I approached it, it suddenly switched to message.
"Clary."
I froze, and time stood still. Just hearing his voice made me want to sink to the floor and cry. It was like rubbing salt on a bloody wound. Stings like hell.
My hand slid over the delete button.
"Your mom told me you were transferring to the School of the Arts. I'm not calling to stop you from going. I'm calling to tell you that if you're transferring, then I am too, even if I can't draw a straight line without a ruler. You can run, but I'm not letting you go, and I'm never going to. I'll fight for you, Clary. Wherever you go, whatever you do, I'm going to be the man by your side, no matter what it takes, or what I have to give up." He took a deep breath. It seemed like he was going to hang up, but then he spoke again, and it made my knees shake. "I love you, Clary."
A teardrop landed on the phone, but I didn't bother wiping it away, and watched it slide down the cord until my vision blurred.
"A man like that only comes once in a lifetime." I didn't realize that my mom was there until she spoke. "Sometimes he doesn't even come at all."
Hastily, I swiped my hand over my eyes, and snorted on accident.
"Do you know why I didn't want you near him?" She didn't wait for my response, but instead continued. "It was because his father broke my heart, and I was afraid he was going to break yours."
My mom and Valentine?
"You don't mean that drunk bastard, do you?"
She chuckled slightly. "He wasn't always drunk. We were high school sweethearts, and all the way through college. Everyone thought that we'd get married after graduation. I did too." She wrung her wrists, looking at her lap. "Then on our sixth anniversary, I found him in bed, with my best friend, Celine."
My eyes popped out, and I forgot all about my own pain. Compared to my mom's tragedy, well, mine was just so petty.
"He drank too much alcohol, and couldn't hold his liquor. He thought I was her. He apologized so many times; he even went down on his knees and begged. He even cried. But I didn't. I couldn't forgive him. And I was afraid that Jace was like his father, and I didn't want you to suffer." She finally looked up at me. "He wasn't always like this, you know. He used to be kind."
"Do you still love him?" I asked.
She bit her lip. "Love isn't the word for it, but there's always a part of me that continues to care for him. You never forget your first love."
I wrapped my arms around my mom, hugging her. She returned it, breathing in shakily. I thought about her, and how much pain she must have been through. I couldn't imagine Valentine swallowing his pride and apologizing. But then, I'd never expected Jace to give up his dream just for me.
Transferring for me. Forcing himself to draw so he could be by my side.
People like that didn't come in a package waiting at your front door. To meet someone like him…
I ran out the door before my mom could say "What the –"
…
Jace
A leaf fell on my head. The same bench. The spot of our first kiss.
I'd come to say goodbye. Goodbye to Clary, goodbye to us, goodbye to all the good times we'd had.
I loved her, and I knew I always would. I couldn't let it go, but this was the best I could do.
Giving up my emotions.
I needed to pack them away again, so when I see her again, I wouldn't break. Cause if I saw her right now, I knew I would.
I got up from the bench. It was time to prepare for my new life.
Drawing.
…
Clary
Something told me to keep running. Running where, I didn't know, until the green trees of Central Park came into view. And I saw him, walking away from a bench, his back toward me.
I ran even harder. I couldn't let him go this time. There were things left unsaid that needed to be said.
I thought he'd turn around at the sound of my thudding footsteps, but he just moved aside, as if I was a random jogger.
But I wasn't.
I grabbed his arm, pulling him to a stop. He spun around, and his lips parted. His eyes were the brightest I'd ever seen them. I stood before him, gasping for air.
And then, he kissed me. Soft and lingering, sad and sorrowful. As if he thought I was going to run away any second. The familiar tint of apples was on my lips again.
He pulled back, a look of regret and self-loathing on his face. "Sorry," he muttered roughly, ducking his head, refusing to look me in the eye.
"I got your message," I said nervously.
"Did you?" His voice was hollow, like he was robotic and devoid of any emotions. I swallowed the bitter taste rising in my throat.
"I've decided to stay with Brown."
His head snapped up, his eyes finally meeting mine with disbelief and astonishment. And brighter than all, hope.
His mouth opened and closed, but nothing came out. In the end, no words needed to be said. He wrapped his arms around me, and buried his face in my hair, hugging me tight and taking deep, shuddering breaths.
After a while, I hesitantly wrapped my arms around him. He sniffed.
Jace? Crying?
I tried pulling back, but he didn't budge.
"I'm not crying." His voice was muffled by my hair. "Your hair's just itchy."
"Hey!"
He squeezed me lightly.
I finally wrested out of his grip and stood facing him. His eyes were a bit sparkly. He tried to glare indignantly, and I smiled inwardly.
"I missed you, Clary," he said softly, the playful glare washing away. "More than you'll ever know."
I stared at him for a long time, and he returned it, calm and clear. No secrets hidden. The truth was plain in his eyes. He loved me.
Who cared about Aline?
I wanted to say Imissedyoumore.Idon'twanttoleaveyouagain.Idon'twantyoutobehurtlikethatagain.
Instead what I said was, "I'm staying under one condition: you let me deal with your dad."
REVIEW!
the next chapter's the last chapter :'(