Disclaimer: The Meyer ownes it all. I only take too long adding my own fun in.
A/N: I have no excuses. I only have to words: real life.
I love all of you. I love you for loving this story and for having an astounding amount of patience with me. I promise I am always working at getting the chapters up. The next one is already started, so hopefully I will have time to finish and post it in a much better frame of time than before.
Thank you for sticking with me and being wonderful! I love IEWIS Land :)
Quickly, let me mention that this chapter may feel different. I don't know... I hope you like it though. I had fun with it and I feel good being back in the story, so I thought I'd dedicate this chap mostly to fun. I promise the rest of the wedding and more plot maneuvering next chap.
And now, believe it or not, Chapter 14!
Chapter 14 - The Boys Are Too Refined
After the plane took off, and Jasper's breathing came back down to a normal rate, it only took about 10 minutes for the seats to be pushed back and the conversations to begin.
The trip from Forks to Mississippi was going to be long, so I was happy Alice's dad was able to get all 6 of us seats next to each other. Carlisle and Esme were in first class, curdosy of Dr. Cullen himself.
"I didn't know you had issues with flying," I commented to Jasper as I sat back in my seat.
I was in the window seat of my row, with Edward next to me, and Emmett next to him in the aisle seat. Alice was directly in front of me, Jasper in front of Edward, and Rose in front of Emmett. When we boarded the plane both Rose and Emmett were insistent on an aisle seat. Edward lost the rock-paper-scissors match to Jasper, so Emmett was placed next to him.
Alice leaned over the back of her chair to face us, resting her b stomach where your back is supposed to go. Jasper and Rose followed suit, turning so we were in a group.
"Oh yeah, he's horrible during take off," Alice sighed as she held out her bag of peanuts to me. She explained before we boarded that she didn't trust airline food, bagged or not bagged.
"I hate landing," I admitted to Jasper with a slight grimace.
"Really? I'm good with landing. I like the feeling of reconnecting with Mother Earth," he smiled.
"I always get paranoid about the plane coming down too fast and swerving at the last second, or the breaks failing and the whole thing just crashing into a building because we can't stop, or going up in flames, or the wheels breaking off and again with the whole crashing into a building and going up in flames... or something horrible like that."
"So your fears aren't based on anything too irrational?" Edward teasingly asked me with a smirk.
I hit his arm and rolled my eyes, still believing my fears to be valid. He just picked up my hand and kissed my knuckles then entwined our fingers together and let them fall in his lap.
"You guys are boring me," Emmett complained, sounding very bored indeed as he reached out and started playing with a lock of Rose's hair.
"Seriously," Rose agreed and she inspected her nails,"there's no way anything bad is going to happen to this flight. Alice and Jazz are getting married in a two days. If the good gods above know what's good for them, they will not prevent Alice from attending her own wedding."
Alice gave an "amen" and high fived Jasper.
I laughed and glanced at Edward who was nodding in agreement. He was watching Romeo and Juliet's hands and not me, however, and I saw the jealous glint in his eye because of his currently empty left hand. He had tried to convince me the night before that riding on a plane was something we needed to practice doing with our rings on. As amusing as it was, I was determined to stick to the No Wedding Bands in Public Before the Wedding law.
"Alice, don't you think your parents may be a bit alarmed at the sight of Jasper already wearing his ring?" Edward asked. I knew I gauged his previous eye glint correctly.
"Eh," Alice shrugged,"Daddy probably wouldn't mind much, and mom's really only concerned with what the 'actual' ring looks like, as she put it. Grammy's probably going to be the only one that has a problem with it. Which is why you have to take it off before we land." She turned to Jasper as she said the last sentence quickly, trying to sneak it in there. Jasper scrunched up his face in confusion.
"Really?" he asked, looking a tiny bit hurt but mostly just confused.
It was amusing, watching the edges of Edward's lips twitching to turn up into a smile. He's such a baby about this Jasper-gets-to-wear-his-ring-early business. A big, gorgeous, charming, adorable baby.
"Yeah. She's really old fashioned. She'll probably give you the third degree about our sex life, too. So good luck with that!"
She giggled a little bit and Edward looked even more pleased with himself as Jasper took his ring off and slipped it into a box he had pulled out of his messenger bag.
"Wait, wait, wait," Jasper said, haulting his movements and letting the bag drop in his lap. He glared at little Alice and she cocked her eyebrow in a "bring it" sort of way.
"I'm going to get the third degree? That's ridiculous, Alice, I've been rejecting you for months upon months now!"
Edward and I were shaking in silent laughter. Rose and Emmett weren't paying much attention, she had pulled out her iPod and they both had one earbud in. Romeo and Juliet were entering into full show-down mode and it was clear who was going to loose. Grammy Romeo would never think ill of her innocent little Alice.
"Yeah, Jasper, I know I've been rejected over and over and over again by the love of my life! I'm pretty sure that's why I'm going to let Grammy have her way with you."
"This is ridiculous," Jasper said again under his breath as he threw his messenger bag back under the set in front of him.
"This is life, Hubby-To-Be. Once you become a Brandon you will learn you can't escape Grammy no matter if you are innocent or not."
Jasper scoffed and stole a few peanuts from Alice's hand.
"First, I'm fairly sure you are going to be a Cullen, not me a Brandon," Jasper paused for his point to sink in and Alice just shrugged as if it was a minor detail who was going to take who's name. Romeo indeed.
"Second, you better reel Grammy in the second we land because I would hate to inform her that her precious little Ali Cat has about 3,000 different methods of seduction, each one with a matching lingerie set."
Jasper raised his eyebrows and I actually snorted out laughter at this point, unable to hold it in. As he laughed Edward reached his hand over to my mouth to help me hold in my embarrassing laughter. It all backfired when I reached my arm up to intercept his hand and I knocked over my cup of water, spilling it all over both of us. He began laughing harder at that point, this time at me, and I dropped my head into my hands in shame. I don't know why he takes me anywhere.
All of this went unnoticed by the star crossed lovers.
"Go right ahead. She'll never believe you," Alice popped a peanut into her mouth and pursed her lips in a defiant way.
Suddenly Emmett reached out his hand and wagged his fingers at her, motioning for her to hand over the bag of peanuts. In her distracted state, Alice kept her stare on Jasper and handed the bag over to the big waiting hand.
"We'll see," Jasper replied confidentially. It was then, watching them stare at each other, that I got a little scared. Not of either of the people sitting before me, but rather for Grammy. These two were going to war over who would win her favor, and both of them had advantages to be considered.
I heard the crinkling of a bag and turned to see Emmett literally pouring the last bit of contents from the peanut bag into his mouth.
"Is this Grammy the same one that gave us the Pretzel?" he asked with a sincere look on his face.
I felt Edward tense next to me and couldn't help but giggle at the mention of The Pretzel.
"Sure is," Alice relplied with a laugh of her own.
"It sounds so wrong, saying that Grammy gave us the Pretzel," Rosalie pointed out.
"Especially since the only one that will be receiving the Pretzel will be Bellarina," Emmett laughed.
Red hot fire. That's what my face felt like the instant the comment left my dumb big brother's mouth.
"Oh my God," I breathed, barely audible, as I tried to hide my face in my hands.
I could hear Rosalie, Alice, and Jasper muffling laughter, being as loud as could be without disturbing the rest of the plane. Then I heard and felt Edward hit Emmett somewhere on his body. I cheered on the Tiny Gentleman as I imagined him outraged at such a horribly unsensitive comment. Sometimes that little guy was my biggest comfort.
After a few moments passed I felt Edward lifting my face out of my hands and making me look at him. He smiled sweetly but his eyes were full of green radiant laughter.
"You're laughing at me, too," I accused.
"No, I'm not," he defended.
"Your eyes are."
"Bella," he half laughed, half sighed. "You have to admit, it was the tiniest bit funny," he whispered only to me, leaning in so close I could feel his breath on my ear.
When he got no reaction out of me he leaned in ever closer.
"October," he whispered in the sort of husky way that usually also sounded sort of strained.
He chuckled as he watched the red flood my face again. Then he leaned down and softly kissed my neck, creating one wonderful shiver to run down my spine.
I remained in a state of blush and shiver for the next few minutes because only one thought was dominating my thoughts.
October + The Pretzel + Bella only equalled to one thing.
Sex. With Edward. My husband. And, of course, his beloved ring.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Our first dinner in Mississippi proved to be an uncomfortable event.
Alice's father only wanted to talk about Alice, Alice's mother talked in a higher pitch and more frequently then Alice, Alice's boy cousin, Alec, wasn't very nice to me, her girl cousin, Jane, was too nice to Edward, and Grammy was not holding back her disapproval of Jasper.
Alice had been right. Grammy automatically assumed everything he said was some sort of sexual plot to get into her innocent granddaughter's pants.
It was mildly funny.
The other great thing was that she loved Emmett to no end.
"Emmie has undoubtedly set a shining example for the other boys," she praised Carlisle and Esme at one point during the meal.
Honestly, I was surprised. I know I'm a bit biased, but guess I had assumed Edward would pull ahead as Grammy's favorite Cullen boy. He so easily won over my mother, not to mention every other living female thing, I just assumed he'd be a shoe-in for Grammy's Fav.
But I knew he had no chance of knocking Emmett off of the pedestal after dinner while we were all helping clean up. I walked into the kitchen and heard Grammy explaining to Alice's mother that, "you never can quite trust the pretty ones." I wasn't positive they were referring to Edward until Mrs. Brandon replied and then had to explain to Grammy exactly what sex hair was, and why a boy his age would have it all of the time.
My blush and I left quickly and quietly after that, thoughts of October and Edward and sex hair running rampant.
"Goodnight sweet Ali Cat," Grammy said as she turned go to bed. "Goodnight children," she addressed the rest of us. "Emmie, keep the girls safe for me while I'm away."
"Will do Grammikins," Emmett replied with a smile as he ruffled Edward and Jasper's hair. His smirk probably looked sweet and warmed Grammy's old heart, but it was definitely just meant to mock his brothers.
"Good boy," she smiled as she turned and walked down the hall away from us.
Us "kids", as Grammy put it, walked upstairs to our rooms. Of course there were two rooms for all eight of us, a boy room and a girl room. Each room had three beds in it since Alice and her numerous cousins had sleep overs dozens of times when they were younger. Both of the rooms we were using we fashioned for those nights, so Rosalie and I were sharing a bed in our room while Alice and Jane took the two smaller beds. I had no idea how the boys were going to work out the four guys to three beds ratio, but I assumed Edward and Jasper would be the best candidates for sharing. Unless Alec wanted to cuddle with Emmett.
"Alright," Alice said as we turned to say goodnight to the guys. "Tomorrow is going to be a pretty busy day, it being the day before the wedding and all."
She paused to look down at her hands where she was holding a clip board of insanity. It was actually the Official Alice Wedding Clip Board of Organization or something silly like that, but I couldn't really remember the name Alice had given it. All I knew was that it had been glued to her hands the second Jane handed it to her at the airport.
"I'm going to read off the schedule so everyone is on the same page when we wake up..."
I leaned into Edward and he wrapped his arms around my waist. I tried not to notice Jane watching his hands wrap around me with an upset glint in her eye.
It was then that Alice began reciting the next day's schedule, and betraying me in one of the worst ways possible.
"Breakfast is at nine thirty. We should be done with that around ten thirty, giving us time to quickly get ready for dress and tux fittings at eleven fifteen. At one we have lunch at the church, followed immediately by the rehearsal of the ceremony. Then there's manis and pedis for the ladies, while the men go get some minor grooming done and Edward get's his hair cut, after which we head back to the church to set up the decorations, and that should take us up until about six thirty or seven when we split up for the bachelor and bachelorette parties. Sound good?"
She didn't look up from her little Clipboard of Matrimony because she knew what she did. To me.
"Alice," I said, tensing all over.
"Yes Bella?"
She spoke too sweetly and still didn't take her eyes off of the Betrothal Board.
"What did you say?"
"Um. What, Bella? Do you need me to repeat the schedule?"
She knew that's not what I meant.
"You know that's not what I mean."
I took a step towards her and Rosalie's brain kicked in.
"Oh, geeze, I know where this is going...."
"Bella," Alice warned, looking up at me with a fight in her eyes.
"No, Alice. No. No. Please? No."
I was closer to her now, Edward's arms had to unwrap from me his hands now resting on my waist. Again, I ignored Jane's eyes taking in every intimate gesture we shared as if it offended her. Choose your battles, right?
"Bella, it's already been decided so please, do not fight me on things concerning my wedding." Alice's little eyes were tight and fierce but my chest was burning.
She was right. It was her wedding. But he was my Edward.
"He does not need his hair cut. Alice. No. No."
I was shaking my head in a small manner, but still frantically. I jammed my finger down on her precious Wedding Clip Board of Betrayal and that's when she snapped into the Alice that always gets her way.
"Bella, I know the first time you had to live through and Edward hair grooming you nearly had an aneurism, but I'm not going to have a lion in my wedding."
"It's not necessary," I said.
"It's not up for discussion," Alice retorted.
"It's not actually that long," Edward defended, no doubt taken back by the lion comment.
"I'm too tired for this," Rosalie announced. "Emmett, I love you, good night. Edward's hair, good luck. Everyone else, I suggest you follow my lead. This may take a while."
Rosalie walked into our room then, with Jane taking her advice and following behind. I hardly noticed her goodnight smile and wave towards my fiance as I held Alice's stern gaze. I felt more than saw Alec and Emmett retreat as well. I guess Jasper and Edward felt the need to hang out as Alice and I finished up our debate. Edward had a right to be a part of the discussion, I suppose. Jasper probably just wanted some Alice canoodling before bed without the disapproving eye of Grammy around.
"Bella, it's happening."
"Alice, I can't handle it. You know that."
She did know, too. At this point in our dating career Edward had only needed to have his hair cut once before. Apparently his hair doesn't grow too fast once it reaches the perfection level. This was good news to me. A few months back, however, right after we moved to Forks, Edward decided his hair needed a trim. He didn't tell me he was getting it done, and when I came home from work that day and saw that many inches of his wonderful mess on top of his head were missing.... it wasn't pretty. I actually mourned it. I even called Alice just to vent my grief over the phone since Edward couldn't stop asking me, "Why is it such a big deal? Hair grows back, doesn't it?".
I didn't agree with him, even though it did of course grow back. He was still gorgeous the whole time it took to grow back, and even if he were in a freak fire accident and burnt off all of his hair I would still love him, but it was so unnecessary when that wasn't the case!
There was no way of helping my irrational behavior about this subject.
I mean, we all have our "things" we get to be super touchy about.
Edward doesn't like people with belts standing within three feet of Lola. Emmett doesn't appreciate people touching any food on his plate, ever. Rosalie can't handle us taking our cars to mechanics she didn't approve of, Jasper gets touchy when you wear his fedora hat without his permission or borrow his vintage The Who? records, Alice will never allow any of us to wear tweed, and I cannot deal with Edward's hair getting cut like a rational human being.
So, whatever. This was my "thing", and she was being very insensitive about it, wedding or no wedding.
"I mean, you don't think you need a hair cut, do you Edward?" I said confidentially as I turned to him.
"Bella," Edward said gently, running his free hand through the hair in question as he spoke, "It is getting sort of long, a hair cut may not be the worst idea."
I felt my eyes narrow.
"Wrong," Jasper laughed, smacking his brother on the back.
"See? I'm doing him a favor," Alice said with pride.
"Guuuuuaaaahhhh."
I'm aware that wasn't a real word. But it was the only thing that managed to escape my mouth as my eyes closed and my head fell into my hands in frustration.
Edward's hands began to move up and down my arms in a comforting sort of motion. Didn't help.
I lifted my head up after about 20 seconds, and that was my mistake. Alice had taken my small break down as a time to re-group and get the upper hand.
Her eyes were wide and round and shining. I knew it was coming before it even had time to happen.
"Bella, this is for me, for my wedding. Please? Please."
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
"How did we get into this predicament again?" Rosalie asked as she handed me a bottle of water that I let drop into my lap, because what the heck did I care about a bottle of water at this point?
"The pout happened," I sighed.
"Ah, I see." She nodded and dropped gracefully into the chair to my right, picking up a magazine right away.
I let out that same "guuaah" sound from the night before and let my head drop to Jasper's shoulder. He was sitting next to me on the red sparkly couch with his arm around me as some sort of comfort mechanism. We were in what was being referred to as "Bella's Confinement Area", but what was really just a waiting area of the salon Jane worked at. Across the room Alice had nodded in approval and some strange man was lifting up pieces of Edward's hair and waving around a stupid pair of scissors like they weren't a small, two bladed mockery of my sanity.
Yes, we were in the salon. Yes, I lost and Edward was getting his hair cut. Yes, Alice's pout can move mountains.
The second I painfully gave in to Alice's stupid hair cut idea she squealed and told me Jane worked at a fabulous salon in town. I saw red and made a list of demands.
1. Jane was not to touch Edward's hair. Ever.
2. A man had to do the job. Because let's face it, I've always been over protective of his hair, dating all the way back to before we were officially dating and he let some little girl at a show run her hands through it when we were trying to make each other jealous.
3. No more than one inch gets cut. One.
After Alice agreed to my list she made a few Bella Rules of her own, which was the reason for my temporary confinement.
1. I was to sit as far away from Edward as possible while the evil deed was done.
2. I was confined to that space the entire time.
3. No "cutting", or threatening to "cut" any woman that complimented his hair while we were in the salon.
The last one was actually made in the car on the way to the salon, because right before we left Jane wouldn't shut up about how much the other women she worked with were going to,"adore the color and jump at the chance to get their hands in something so unique".
I sort of went into a rage black out in the car once she was out of ear shot of my, but I can recall saying something along the lines of, "I will cut any female that does any unnecessary touching."
So, yeah. Bella Rule #3.
"Miss Bella, you are too silly for your own good," Jasper chuckled as his hand patted my shoulder gently.
"Hey Bella, you should take this magazine, these wedding gowns look like they are right up your alley," Rose said randomly.
"Uh, ok," I replied, holding out my hand for the magazine.
I opened it up but kept my head on Jasper's shoulder and let the wedding catalog rest in my lap. I felt weak. But I knew Rosalie was trying to help distract me and I appreciated that so I took the bait calmly.
Just then my phone vibrated in my pocket and I jumped a bit before taking it out.
You are too cute.
I smiled because Edward always made me happy, even in text form, but I didn't look up at him in fear of what kind of massacre I might be forced to witness. I wasn't sure if they started yet, so instead I decided to focus on how awesome it was he was texting me from across the room because we were too far away to actually speak.
You are too in trouble for agreeing to this
Oh silly Bella. Don't you trust my judgement?
Of course. It's the a-holes with the f'kn scissors I don't trust.
I heard his musical laughter across the room and smiled because I knew he didn't expect my language do take such a dip in classiness.
I love you. What are you reading so intently?
Wedding magazine. Rosalie handed it to me. It's not very distracting, though.
Hmm. How can we distract you more efficiently?
Get out of the chair of doom and kiss me.
Get out of my brothers arms, face your fears, and come kiss ME.
I half laughed half frowned at his comment about being in Jasper's arms. I knew he was joking but I had a knee jerk reaction of looking up to see his eyes to make sure he was free of upset.
"Oh no you don't," Jasper said with a laugh as his hand clasped over my eyes.
"What the heck?" I laughed. He was so quick I didn't even get to glance at Edward.
"Bella, they are in full on cut-mode. You need to keep your eyes away, honey," Rosalie said with a laugh of her own.
I breathed a small, "oh", and my stomach knotted up.
My phone buzzed again and as I tilted my head back down Jasper let his hand fall away from my face.
That was close ;) It's ok. I can distract you without physical contact.
I'm pretty sure my breath caught at what ran through my head due to that comment.
Oh really? How? Dirty talk? You're not even allowed to say "porno", remember? :)
I do not need pornographic material to distract my fiance, thank you very much. Just hang with me. I promise this isn't as bad as your silly imagination is making it out to be.
Sigh. So how is it going anyway? Will I even recognize you? Where's Jane?
I couldn't help it. All I could picture was her staring at my Edward, and I didn't like it.
Well, it's going fine, I suppose. It's a hair cut, Bella. Jane is sitting in the seat next to me talking my ear off.
I suppose that's better than her talking your pants off.
Again I heard the musical sound, this time in chuckle form.
What does that even mean, love?
I don't know... But she definitely wants your pants off.
I've noticed the stares, I'm not going to lie.
I don't like it.
I don't either!
Did you like it when I used to stare at you?
When did you stare at me?
Only every single day I knew you before we were allowed to love each other openly.
I'm not sure if that's extremely creepy or not.
It's not :)
Haha. Again, I love you. Even in all of your creeping staring glory.
You creeped me out when you stared at me.
What are you talking about?
You know. Right before the Black Hole Days ended. At the show that Jacob and Sam came to. You stared at me all night.
Hmm. I guess I wasn't very aware of myself that night. I was too caught up in... well, you.
That seems like years ago, doesn't it?
Yes. I cannot believe I get to marry you after screwing up so badly.
I smiled at that comment. Then I sighed because there was no need for talk of screwing up. We were together and happy now.
I cannot believe I get to marry you, period.
October.
My cheeks heated as that one word brought back memories of hidden promises whispered to me on the place the day before. I couldn't help it. It was like Edward made up a new dirty word.
Why are you blushing? Is there an article about honeymoon activities in that magazine? ;)
Geeze, no! I'm just remembering the last time you said that word to me... on the plane... you know why I'm blushing!
Ah, yes. Because it implies that we will be having sex.
I gasped when I read that text and shook my head in disbelief at his blatant statement. Again the laughter echoed throughout the salon and I wondered if Little Jane Talky Pants thought she grew an extra special funny bone because of all the time Edward was breaking out in laughter due to our odd text conversation.
Edward!
What, love?
Again with the sounds of the chuckle.
You know what. The thought of you.... and sex just... flusters me, ok?
I understand. Many things about you "fluster" me ;) Are you nervous? For the wedding night? Be honest.
I couldn't believe we were having this conversation via text message in the middle of Mississippi in a salon full of friends and family and strangers. At least his promise of distracting me wasn't failing.
Uh, yes. Yes I am. But then again, I'm not, because it's you. You know?
I do. Oh! That' exactly what I will say mere hours before I ravish you in all of the sexual ways ;)
It was my turn to laugh out loud and Jasper asked me what was so funny. When I shook my head in refusal to speak he tried to steal my phone but I poked him in the ribs, hard.
"Alright, sorry! I won't try and read your dirtly little text messages," he teased.
I poked him again, hard, and he pulled lock of my hair kind of hard while we laughed.
"Keep it up Swan, and I'll tell Grammy to do a text message check."
We both laughed harder at that because earlier in the morning Grammy actually threatened to do a "portable phone" check on Jasper's cell phone, in case he had any mystery numbers on there that Alice needed to be concerned about.
I went back to reading through the bridal magazine, pointing out a few different gowns I liked to Rose and pushing away thoughts of Edward ravishing me in any way.
A few minutes later, when I was reading an article all about picking out the right kind of centerpieces for your reception and freaking out because I wasn't aware there was a way to pick out the wrong centerpieces, I got another text from Edward.
Look up.
My eyes widened and I took a second to gather myself before actually looking up because this was the moment of truth.
And then I did.
And....and.....and...
And he didn't look that different.
"You look amazing!" I practically yelled, throwing my arms around his neck as he laughed at me.
"See! You like it!" Alice accused as Edward released me and we turned to leave the hair cut hell hole.
"No, I just don't see any difference," I said with a shrug and a large smile.
They boys and Rosalie all chuckled at me and I continued smiling in victory and checking the time on my phone. How the heck did that take 20 minutes?
"You said he looked amazing, though," Jane said from behind us, nothing but actual confusion in her tone.
"I know. Edward au-natural always looks amazing," I spelt out for her. Duh.
"Well I can see the difference, and I feel a lot better," Alice said as she checked off something on the Clip Board of Marital Bliss.
"What now, chief?" Emmett asked Alice as we approached the vehicle we had been using all day. He and Alec has decided to sit in the SUV Alice's dad let us borrow and they were watching DVDs of 24. Alec turned Emmett into a major Jack Bauer fan in a matter of minutes.
"Now we are off to the church for decorating, and then we split off to begin partying away our freedom!"
Alice laughed and looked up at Jasper with her last comment. He smirked and kissed her forehead as we climbed into the giant vehicle and drove away.
My hand ran through Edward's hair the entire way to the church and we were both pretty thrilled it all ended so well.
"It's so soft, Bella. Do you feel that?" he asked me for the thousandth time, reminding me of the beginning of our relationship when he would always obsess over the softness of his hair and I wasn't as used to it as I was now.
I just nodded and kissed him. In a weird way, I felt more connected to Edward after the whole ordeal. I'd managed to work through my crazy hair issues and we'd had a sort of random text conversation about sex and our aversions to Jane. What can I say? I sort of felt accomplished. And we still had a whole church to decorate…
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
The first bachelorette party I ever attended was Alice Brandon's.
Even though I'd been sharing a bathroom with it for a good part of my life, the first time I ever tasted whiskey was at Alice Brandon's said bachelorette party....resulting in the first time I ever got drunk.
We'd gone to a nice dinner with the numerous ladies in her family. There were about 20 women all together at the small Italian place we went to, all of them some sort of cousin or aunt or something. It was hard to keep track of them all individually because they were all small with black shiny hair, though Alice had beat them all in shortness on both accounts.
Grammy was there, telling everyone all of her reservations about poor Jasper.
"California boys are known to be wild," she'd say, refusing to listen to Alice's arguments that Jasper was from a tiny town in Washinton.
"Blondes are promiscuous"... "Sandy, you should see his eyes, full of secrets," and my personal favorite comment from the evening, "he and the pretty one probably made a sport of bedding young ladies in Los Angeles. Dirty boys love those demeaning sort of competitions…"
So it only made sense that by the time we left the dinner and found ourselves being dragged into Ride Em's, the infamous mechanical bull bar, by the younger portion of Alice's cousin population, Alice was not exactly opposed to be on 6 Shot Alice's old stomping grounds.
In fact, she was a little too comfortable there.
"You guys," she panted as she grabbed Rose and I each by a hand. She'd just come from being literally carried around the circular bar in the middle of the room. Apparently the people at Ride Em's had missed Miss 6.
We had been hiding in the corner. Me too try and disappear because, uh, Bella doesn't really do the bar scene, Rosalie because she was "getting a feel for the place" or something.
"Come on, we're doing the 6!" Alice told us as she plopped us in an empty space at the bar.
"What?" Rosalie and I both gasped.
"You know, the 6," Alice said as she winked at us and simply flicked her wrist at Pete the bar tender. In one swift movement he had 6 shot glasses up on the counter.
As he started pouring what I assume was vodka into two of the six glasses, I panicked.
"Alice, I don't want to rain on your parade here, but what the heck are you doing? I thought 6 Shot Alice was dead." I tried to laugh a little bit to show how cool I was with all of this, but truth was I wasn't. I didn't mind that Alice was going to drink. I just minded that it was in a place she had sworn she never wanted to be in again, doing the one thing she swore she never wanted to do again.
Friends bring that stuff up to other friends, right? Accountability and all that.
"Relax, Bella. I'm not going to do all 6 shots," Alice said as she laid a hand on my arm in a comforting manner. Behind her Jane slammed 2 shots of whiskey down and smiled at me sweetly.
"You're not?" Rosalie asked in a disbelieving tone with an amused smirk on her face. The shots were now sitting on the bar directly in front of us.
"Oh no. I'm not here to get belligerent. We're splitting them." Alice smiled proudly and held up 2 of the shot glasses, She smiled back and forth between Rosalie and I for a second before setting 1 down in front of each of us.
"Two, two, and two. That way we all get a little somethin' somethin', but none of us gets out of control."
She smiled again as she explained what I'm sure she assumed to be a brilliant plan. She set the remaining two shots down in front of Rose and I.
Rosalie said, "Sweet, this place seems pretty all right," and picked up one of her tiny glasses. Alice followed suit and they both turned towards me at the same time with expectant looks on their faces.
I tried to ignore Jane leaning on the counter behind Alice, staring at me expectantly as well.
"Um, ok," I hesitated as I picked up a shot and tried to smile. It wasn't like I was so opposed to drinking I wanted to back out. I'd just heard way too many stories about shots being painful to swallow. Why would I be excited about being on the threshold of that exact pain now?
"What's wrong, Bella?" Alice asked, sensing my hesitation.
"I'm just not so sure about doing a shot of vodka. I've heard horror stories, you know?" I shrugged because I was not trying to make this into a huge ordeal, but I was going to be honest about my discomfort.
"Vodka is sort of rough," Rosalie commented to Alice.
"Try whiskey," Jane cut in, confirming that she was listening in on all of our interactions up until this point. It wasn't that weird I guess, I noticed she didn't seem very close to any other cousins during the dinner and she definitely didn't seem interested in being with any of them now. Maybe she usually hung out with Alice at family functions and now Rose and I were hogging her.
Jane then slid 2 shots she had in front of her over to our side of the bar and they were a dark liquid. Whiskey. Edward's drink.
I smirked at that thought and at the face I knew Edward would make if he knew I was thinking of it as "his drink." He only got drunk off of the stuff once, but somehow it made me feel comforted knowing the first time I did any real drinking of alcohol it would be whiskey as well.
"Is this Jack Daniels by any chance?" I asked Jane as she pushed the shots closer to me and grabbed for the vodka I wasn't going to shoot.
"Indeed it is," she replied without looking at me.
I smiled to myself and picked up both small glasses, nodding once to Rosalie and Alice who looked like they knew why I asked that question.
"Alright then," Alice began with a smile. "Here's to my last night being a Brandon, and the beginning of our fine asses invading the fine ass Cullen family!"
The three of us laughed and clinked the small glasses together. Following their lead I closed my eyes and poured the first shot down my throat. I instantly felt something… unnatural. Before I could register what it was I heard Rosalie yelling, "fast Bella! Drink them both fast!" and my second hand lifted to my mouth to pour the second shot down.
Once it was all the way down I felt many things at once. I felt discomfort from the unfamiliarity of the taste of straight liquor. I felt warmth all the way down my chest. I felt victory over taking my first two shots ever, and I felt confused at how something could taste spicy, warm, harsh, and brown all at the same time.
I opened my eyes to a smirking Rose, Alice, and Jane.
"You ok?" Jane asked with a laugh. It wasn't a terribly friendly laugh, but it wasn't condescending either.
"Um, yeah. That's not so bad. I can see why Edward got into this stuff," I said with a slight shrug.
Alice and Rosalie laughed and I refused to notice how Jane's eyes flickered in interest of Edward's name.
"So, what now?" I asked all three of them.
Something was happening to my body. The warmth I felt in my chest was subsiding and being replaced with a small tingling. It was barely noticeable, but it was there.
"Now I ride the bull!" Alice cheered.
She ran off into the crowd with Jane tagging behind her and I looked up at Rosalie.
"You guys aren't going to get me drunk at make me ride the bull, are you?" I asked with real fear.
And then, for some reason, it was sort of funny to be asking Rosalie a question. I laughed a little bit.
"No, Bella, we won't do that. Well, we won't make you ride the bull at least."
I nodded along until I really heard her words. By the time I was ready to ask her a question she was handing me something. It looked like soda with a tiny black straw in it, which meant there was clearly something else in it.
"For me?" I asked as I took the drink.
"Yes ma'am. Alice is done drinking for the night, I'm pretty sure, but I don't think we need to be. I mean, you've never really drank before and I kind of think it would be fun to experience it with you. I'd like to see Bella gone wild."
She laughed to herself and I noticed how shiny her hair was even in the dim light of the bar. Rosalie's so pretty. It made me smile.
And the drink she picked out was gooooooooood. It was like the 2 shots I had, but instead of warm and harsh it tasted sweet and cold.
I took another drag from the straw and realized now was as good a night as any to have my first drunken experience.
"Bring it, Rosalie Hale. Get me crunk!"
I laughed out loud with her at that statement and we clinked our drinks together. Hers was green and fruity looking, and as we took another sip I started to miss Edward a little bit.
"Do you know what the guys are doing tonight?" I asked her.
"I don't, actually. I did overhear that it wasn't going to be anything too crazy though," she said, motioning to Alice who was now riding the mechanical bull like a pro. "Jasper's too scared of letting anyone get in any sort of trouble on his watch. Grammy's got him pretty paranoid."
Even though I felt bad for Jasper I laughed and took another sip of my yummy drink. I liked knowing Edward was safe and before I knew it Rose and I had gotten seats at the bar and were having a very pleasant conversation with Pete the bartender on what sorts of mixed drinks wouldn't make us too sick.
About an hour later, nothing much had changed except Rosalie and I were smashed, Alice was sitting on top of the bar instead of the bull telling stories from LA, and Jane was sitting next to me with her head on my shoulder.
Ok. So kind of a lot had changed.
All of the occupants of Ride Em' had crowded around the bar to mingle. There weren't that many people left, mostly Alice's cousins and a few of the regulars who were all very kind, very tame people. They had all missed Alice, understandably, and I felt truly comfortable in a room of strangers that suddenly felt like my closest friends.
Everyone was just sooooo niiiiice.
"I know!" Rosalie agreed with me.
Oh. Apparently I said that out loud.
"Bellsy, you've said everyone was nice about a thousand times," Jane laughed and pushed on my leg a little bit. It liked it. It made my chair swivel. Maybe I should ask her to push me again…
"But really, are people in California this niiiiiiiice?" I asked Rose, picking up a piece of her incredibly beautiful shiny hair. "Your hair is niiiiiice too, Rose. Shiny."
"These people are nicer than my hair, Bella," Rosalie laughed.
I had figured one thing out about Rosalie, even through my own drunkenness. Drunk Rose only listened to a few words in people's sentences, and then formed a response to them from the words she picked up on. It made it extremely difficult to keep the flow of conversation going.
"I know's who's nice with their hair," Jane said suddenly, picking her head off my shoulder and pointing at me. I felt really empty on my left side without her there.
"Edward!" I cheered because all this talk of hair was just making me think of bronze, bronze, bronze, love, love, love.
"Yes! How did you know that?" Jane asked, smacking her hands down on the bar.
"I have something to say," I announced.
I'd also noticed things about my own drunken self during the night. Apparently I like to announce when I have something to say quite often. The weird thing was, though I could register I was doing it I couldn't turn it off.
"What, Bellsy?" Jane asked me sincerely as she picked the tiny black straw up out of her drink and began chewing on it. I felt hungry as I watched her chew.
"I'm hungry. And you, Janesy, yooooou like looking at Edward." I felt myself lazily point my finger at her but I wasn't angry about my accusation thought I remembered I should be. I think it made me pout.
"Yeah," Jane sighed, resting the side of her head on her hand and continuing to chew on that darn straw.
Seriously, had it been 36 hours since we ate? I wanted foooooooood.
"I know he's yours though. He looks like my old boyfriend, so it's kind of weird. You wouldn't have liked him Bellsy. He was mean and always wrong. I loved him, and he left me, and now I'm in this wedding even thought I'm sad. Seeing you with Edward makes me miss him. I'm hungry too."
I nodded and felt sad that my new friend Jane had an old, mean boyfriend.
"You guys are so hungry all of the time! Stop talking bad about the boys," Rosalie said suddenly from my other side. It was only then that I noticed she was braiding my hair. It felt nice. Maybe Edward will braid my hair every night before we go to bed. Hmmmm. Nice.
"Bellsy, are you mad at me?" Jane asked as I noticed there was some ice left in my last empty drink cup. I instantly got excited because ice was edible.
"Jane, Janesy," I felt my head do another fun spinny thing as I whipped it around to one of my new favorite faces. She's pretty like Alice….
"What?" she asked. It took me a second to remember I had started speaking to her.
"Oh. I have something to say!"
"Good. I like your words. What?"
"Can we be friends now? I mean," I took a second to chew some ice and I felt something really, really cold fall down my chin. Rosalie reached over with a cocktail nap and wiped it up. Nice.
"Bellsyyyyy," Jane took the straw out of her mouth and threw it on the counter. "We will always be friends!"
"Always, always?" I asked, because it seemed so important that she knew my intentions were to be friends forever.
She nodded rapidly, kind of making me loose track of her for a second until I could focus in on her leaning towards me for a hug.
"This is the sweetest shit I have ever seen," Rosalie said suddenly with conviction.
"Cussin' Day!" I cheered as I turned to her and noticed her pretty, pretty blonde hair for the milltionth time that night.
She clapped, I clapped, and the next thing I knew we had Alice's attention.
Right as Alice decided it was a good idea to pull me up on the bar to give the whole place instructions on how to do the shimmy throw, one of the best sounds in my little Bella world boomed through the crowd.
"Who ordered a male stripper?!"
I fell down laughing, thankfully only falling back into my barstool because Alice was having a hard time actually getting me to lift myself up onto the bar.
Rosalie yelled, "Emmett! Emmett's here to strip!" and then she began giggling wildly and "whooing".
I noticed Emmett's face turn confused and amused at the same time and it made me laugh because he looked really silly being all confused.
And then I grew confused because where did Emmett come from? Was he always here? How come he hadn't been talking to Janesy and me?
I was going to confront him on it because the confusion in my head was so so so strong I couldn't let it go.
But then I saw Edward and I forgot about everything else.
Edward. Edward. Edward. Bronze. Love. Soft. Edward. Hair. Love. Love. Love. Bronze. Edward. Love.
Drunk me did a lot of word association.
Suddenly I was in his arms and smelling his scent and so happy he was there, I didn't even have time to be confused as to why. It seemed I wasn't drunk enough to forget he hadn't been there all along. I was drunk enough, however, not to give a crap as to why he was with me now.
"Edward I don't even care why you're here," I admitted to him and kissed his mouth because it belonged to me and that made me happy.
"Bella, are you....wait….have you...?" he unlocked my arms from around his neck and held both of my hands in my lap while looking so deeply into my eyes I felt it in my stomach. I noticed he was chuckling and decided I should as well because if he was happy I was happy and we could be happy together.
"Bellsy is a bit tipsy," Jane giggled from beside me. Edward glanced at her and then back at me, and amused smirk lighting up his face. It looked so good on him, this amusement. I wanted to amuse him for forever and for always.
"Is it true? Is Isabella drunk?" his perfect mouth asked me as he leaned in closer. It was surprising how out of tune the world around me was in my silly state, but how focused and clear Edward remained to me.
"Edward," I whined, letting my head fall into his chest.
Smell him, I thought to myself, because he always smells so good. I did. I smelled him in one big smell and it was one of the best choices I have ever made.
"I don't like Isabella, you know that," I informed him after my grand smelling of his chest.
He was aware of my aversion to my full name. Most of the time I let him get away with using it, because he makes it sound sort of nice, but for some reason I wasn't comfortable with it now. Maybe I was too used to hearing "Bellsy" for the past hour and a half.
"Well I love Isabella," his hot mouth said close to my ear.
I knew he was messing with me. I knew he was playing with drunk Bellsy because he I was acting all silly and liquidy. I knew it, and I thought maybe I should be mad, but all I could do was giggle and stick my hands under his shirt.
"Watch yourself, love, we are in public," he laughed huskily into my ear. Public-shmublic, his skin was warm.
"I have something to say," I told Edward because now, in my head, it was only he and I in the room.
I moved my hands around to the small of his back and I felt him chuckle and take a step in as I pulled him closer to me.
Closer, Edward. Always closer.
"You do?" he asked me with a smile.
"Yes." I took a second to feel how soft the skin on his back was. I was certain I'd never felt anything like it before. Except, wait, I had... I had felt his back before, many times.
That made me smile and giggle all over again.
"Bella?" he asked me with another small confused laugh.
"Oh, oops, I got sidetracked by the soft, soft skin. On your back. Sorry. I still have something to say."
He raised one brow at me and I blushed when I realized I had just said that out loud.
"I love you, too!"
There, I said it.
"Was that all you had to say? You made it seem as if you had a a lot to talk about," he said to me as he rested his forehead against mine.
Again, with the soft! His skin was so niiiiiice tonight.
"Um, yeah. That was it. Janesy and I have talked a lot already. I'd pretty much just rather kiss you now," I admitted, because why shouldn't he know that I wanted to kiss him?
"Janesy?" Is what I thought I heard him say quietly before I placed my lips on his and melted.
A few minutes later, or maybe hours, I'm not too sure, I was kissing Edward, we were in the giant SUV on the way back to Alice's house.
"Alice!" Rosalie yelled right next to me. I laughed really hard because I thought her yelling in my ear should hurt but it didn't and that made me happy.
I was squished into the middle seat with her, Emmett, and Edward because Janesy passed out in the very back seat and Mr. and Mrs. Romeo and Juliet were in the front seat. Jasper-ette was driving and Alic-eo was in the passenger seat holding the iPod. And they were holding hands which was cute. It was all rather sweet to my liquid brain.
Someone should always be in charge of holding hands and holding the iPod.
"What do you need my Rose?" Alice turned to ask. Her smile was pretty and I thought it made her look excited to be marrying Jasper the next day.
"I miss you, my Alice. I miss you, and I miss Bellasy, and I miss Eddie and I miss this!"
Rosalie flailed her hands around the front end of the SUV where we were all sitting. I nodded along with her movements because she was gesturing to our little family and I missed them too. Or at least I would. I couldn't now, they were here! Silly.
"I have something to say!" I sat up from leaning into Edward and I heard him mumble, "of course you do," but when I turned to smack him in the chest for making fun of me he grabbed my hand and kissed my palm with a smile.
"What do you have to say, love?" he asked instead, making me happy and even more happy.
"I need to say that I agree with Rose." I lifted up my finger to make a point and I felt proud I was able to speak my mind.
Then I felt myself pout because it made me sad to say that I missed everyone out loud.
"I think you mean that you are going to miss everyone again, after the wedding when we all have to go back to real life. Is that correct, Bella?" Japser said from the front seat. I was impressed he could say so many words and park the car at the same time.
"Yes. Yeah," I agreed.
Even though the car was parked none of us moved to get out of the vehicle. Alice was still dancing to the song that was playing and Rosalie was trying to braid Emmett's hair.
"Look, none of this sad business tonight, ok crazy ladies?" Emmett said in his big cheerful voice.
"Good call, Em," Alice agreed. I noticed she was still dancing and decided to dance along.
"Ok," I agreed. "No more sad because - oh my gosh!"
And then, in the middle of my sentence, it hit me like a ton of bricks.
"Romeo and Juliet are getting married tomorrow!"
I covered my mouth and turned to look at Edward because he always knows what I'm talking about and always understands me and I was freaking out over the fact that we were all in a wedding tomorrow. And he's niiiiice to look at.
"Romeo and Juliet?" Jasper asked, making me turn quickly to him.
"It's a long story," Edward informed him, which was kind of him. I didn't want to speak with my hands still over my mouth.
I think Alice insisted that Edward tell the story of how she became Romeo and Jasper became Juliet, because I registered that we were all laughing and Alice was telling Jasper, "I love my pretty little Juliet," as she leaned over the center console and kissed him. Her. Him. Her...hmm.
This Romeo and Juliet business was getting confusing.
Again, things seemed to move too quickly and before I knew it Edward's sweet lips were pressed against mine, but this time it was in a goodbye and I was sad.
I clung to him and he promised to see me in the morning, we were only going to bed. I made him promise me three separate times that he would never leave me, and he did, all three times. Then he kissed me once on the nose, saying something that I was too tired to comprehend that sounded like, "silly fella".
Luckily I fell into instant sleep mode once my head hit the pillow. I was spooning with Rosalie because we both liked drunk cuddling and we were fortunate enough to be sharing a bed.
"Rose," I whispered as loud as I could so she would definitely hear me.
"Hmm?" she hummed against my back.
"I have something to say…"
"Hmmm?"
"I had a niiiiice night. I really nice, nice, nice, nice, nice night."
"Mmm-hmm."
"Thanks."
"Mmm."
The next thing that happened was loud and bright.
"Get up pretty ladies! Stop cuddling and get up! It's my wedding day! EEEEEEEEE!"
Ok, it's been over a month since I've had to face the facts. Hit or miss? To those of you that ask, yes, I've gotten "miss" reports before, and that's why I continue to ask. They have been few and far between, but I need to know if the numbers rise because I'm not going to continue down a path of misses! haha
Anyway, thank you again and again for the love and patience! Please know that I love this story and I cannot help that college and work get in the way of finding a proper amount of time to give. I'm not quitting though, there will always be more more more until I announce the last chap :)
Send me all of your thoughts and give me as many as you want! Long reviews are my friends.
Next up: The actual Romeo and Juliet wedding!
LOVE YOUS!