Disclaimer: Don't own'em
A/N: Episode is 'Real Deal SEAL'. All you need to know is that Harm is defending a SEAL who, in an effort to flush out an assassin (unrelated to his case, I think), takes a hit out on Harm. Harm of course goes along, bunch of stuff happens, and Harm goes to face the assassin on his own, somewhere far and isolated. He doesn't tell Mac any of this, and only asks her to get a continuance in court – she's prosecuting the SEAL – while he goes after the assassin, whom he ends up killing.
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Insights 14/23
Harm's SUV
En route from the airport
Friday
0838 Local
"Are you alright?" Mac asked from the passenger seat. She'd been throwing appraising glances in his direction since she'd found out the whole story. He'd been thankful that she'd let him be, and slept through most of the flight back to DC. It had put off the conversation he sensed she wanted to have.
"Why wouldn't I be?" He answered easily.
"You killed a man." She hesitated, watching him more openly now, "Want to talk about it?"
"I'm fine." He said, and hoped his tone would put an end to this topic.
"You know, you can trust me." She made it sound as though he didn't know, which was ludicrous. Not to mention upsetting.
"What? What's that supposed to mean?"
"If you'd told me what was going on." She said unexpectedly. "You could've trusted me to watch your six."
He took a breath. He should've realized she'd want to analyze this.
"I know, Mac." He meant it.
She turned to look out her window, deep in thought.
The silence was starting to get to him.
"Mac. I was worried you'd overreact."
"Overreact?" There was a hard edge to her tone as she turned to look at him. "About the fact that your client hired an assassin to kill you?"
"See what I mean." He answered impatiently.
"Harm." She warned in response to his attitude. "You assured me you weren't involved in any of Rivers' crazy schemes. You asked me to go to the judge for a continuance with no explanation and I did, based solely on the fact that I trust you. Obviously, trusting your judgment was my first mistake."
"I didn't think you'd understand." He rebutted, trying to bite back his anger at that barb. "And by the looks of it, I was right."
"What I don't understand is how Rivers can appeal to your ego and actually end up getting you to go along with his half-assed ideas. You and your testosterone. You are such a ... a man sometimes.
"I'd hope so," He joked, sensing she wasn't going to budge on this point.
She sighed. "Harm, I learned a long time ago that once you set your mind to something, it's a waste of time to try and talk you out of it, no matter how ill-advised. All I can do is make sure that I'm watching your six, be it was your partner or your friend or anything else, and I can't do that if you keep me in the dark."
He put his hand on her knee, his thumb gently rubbing back and forth.
"I didn't mean to hurt you." He attempted to make amends, even though he didn't think he'd done much of anything ill-advised. "You know it's not that I don't trust you."
"Then? What am I supposed to think?" She asked. He hated it when she levelled that hurt look in his direction.
He also hated admitting he was wrong – not that he was wrong here, his actions were just being misinterpreted – let alone apologizing.
He cleared his throat. "So I didn't go about it the right way, and I shouldn't have kept you in the dark." Then he added, "Even if things worked out in the end."
She turned to look at him; he thought she even seemed slightly amused. She raised her eyebrow. "Is that an apology?"
"Consider it an acknowledgment." He offered.
She studied him intently for a moment, before shaking her head with a fond exasperation. "Acknowledgment accepted."
They shared a grin, but she was quick to sober.
"You sure you're alright? This is me you're talking to." She put her hand on top of his, where it was resting on her leg.
"I'm fine, Mac." He said warmly, and squeezed her knee. "Thanks."
She seemed sort of satisfied, so he jumped at the chance to change the subject.
"We'll head to your place?" He asked.
She nodded. "Makes sense. I think your fridge is empty."
She fell into a silence, and he left her to it as his thoughts wandered over the events of the past few days. He didn't think he should've done anything differently. Rivers was the kind of crazy it was best to keep Mac away from. And he could handle himself.
"Harm." Her voice cut through his thoughts. She sounded unsure of something.
"Yeah." He threw her an inquisitive glance.
"You think I'm being unfair to Jingo?"
"What?" He exclaimed. "How?"
"I mean, I'm almost always off somewhere on assignment, and he's stuck being carted from Louise's to my place and sometimes to yours. He's ageing, and..." She trailed off.
"Mac, Jingo's fine. You've given him a great home. He gets food, treats and trips to that park just up the street. This for a dog who was going to be put down because the DEA thought he'd passed his usefulness."
She contemplated his words for a moment with her eyes fixed on him, and then broke into a slow smile.
"You know Chloe said I have a thing for strays."
He laughed. "Did she?"
"Yup," She answered, and he recognized her playful teasing mood. "Says it's something you and I have in common."
"Hey, you remember what Chloe said, when she came by JAG that first time?" He could give as good as he got. Besides, he was curious.
Suddenly, though, Mac was far from chatty.
"No." Was her too-quick reply.
He checked his blind spot, only so that he could hide his grin from her.
"That's alright. I can jog your memory." He was in a charitable mood.
"That's the exit to my place," Mac said unnecessarily; he was already halfway up the exit ramp.
He ignored her lame attempt at redirection.
"She said that you talked about me all the time." He gave her that cocky expression that always netted him a roll of her eyes and sometimes even an indulgent smile. "Fantasized about me, even."
She rolled her eyes, but no smile was forthcoming. Harm's grin widened; this time he made no attempt at hiding it.
"Yeah, well Chloe also told the admiral he should ask me out." She informed him.
Harm choked on his laughter, even as he gave her points for an impressive attempt at redirection.
He decided to grant her a momentary reprieve.
"She did not." He challenged.
"Oh, yes she did." Mac was blushing even as she said this. "I thought was I was going to die of embarrassment."
"How'd the admiral take it?"
A marked silence was his only reply.
He looked over at her when he realized no answer seemed imminent. She was examining her hands where they rested on her lap. He had to smile that she was still embarrassed over the incident.
"He was surprisingly gracious, once I apologized." She finally said.
Harm grinned, and decided she was uncomfortable enough about this topic to make it the subject of future ribbing. He could already imagine the fun he was going to have needling her. Speaking of having fun needling her...
"So," He said slowly, thoroughly enjoying himself. "You fantasized about me, French fry?"
"There's my building," She said, once again unnecessarily; he was already midway through parallel parking his SUV right by the front entrance.
"C'mon, Mac." He couldn't control his mad grin as he put the car in park and devoted his full attention to her. "You know, silence is as good as a confession."
"Harm." She said in that tone of infinite patience. "Chloe lied quite a lot back then, before her life settled down a bit, you know that. She saw you, figured you were the best looking guy at the office, and she spun her web."
"So you think I'm the best looking guy at the office!" He pounced on her statement, his vindication back in full force. Not to mention his ego: Mac thought he was hot, way back then. "It was the dress whites and gold wings all along, wasn't it?" He bragged, with a self-satisfied arrogance that usually got a rise out of her. "You just can't resist me, can you French fry."
She sighed heavily as she pulled open her door and hopped out.
"You are hopeless," She muttered as she walked away, followed by the sound of his laughter.