Author's Note: Hi, everyone. I hope you guys still remember that this fanfic exists. I'm sorry for the really long update. I really am. I was busy with my final year in high school, and I lost interest in continuing. But then the motivation to continue this fanfic came back around a month ago. Anyways, I'll let you read the new chapter of this fanfic. Have fun.
Chapter Fourteen
Listen: the sound of crickets fills the air.
Sakura has her gaze fixed into the darkness ahead of her while she pays attention to the rising of her stomach as she takes each breath. She often glances at the time on her phone screen, anxiously waiting for her eyes to close and quietly drift into a deep sleep.
She can hear the invisible clock tick. Its sound reverberates in her head, washing out the sound of the crickets outside her house. Tick. Tock. Tick. Tock. Over and over again. She is hypnotized by its sound. Time was slowly running out.
"Then how do you feel about me, sensei?"
Cringing, she forces the memory out of her mind for good. Unfortunately, it doesn't do any justice. No matter how hard she tries to shake it off, it will creep its way back and make her squirm all over again.
"I can't really tell you anything for now, Sakura. Yes, I've been distant, but that's because I don't want anything bad to happen."
Frustrated, she runs her delicate fingers through her pink hair and opens her phone to check the time.
Two-fifteen and she isn't sleepy yet.
Grumbling, she gets up from her bed and stretches her stiff muscles. She hadn't taken off the white cotton dress she wore during the party. Just as she is about to grab her hoodie on top of the chair, she looks at the present Hatake-sensei gave her just hours ago. She hasn't opened it yet and doesn't plan to. She quietly slips out of her room.
The hallway is dark and she can hear her mom's loud snore coming from the other room. She measures her steps towards the front door downstairs, careful to not make a sudden noise that can arouse her mom from sleep.
The sound of the lock turning pierces through the still night air. She freezes in place; ear sticking up to still hear her mom's snore. She slips into her shoes before sneaking out through the door.
Once she's outside, she runs down the empty street as if a ghost is chasing her. Panting heavily, she doesn't know where to go. She keeps on running and running, wherever her feet are taking her. Her heart pounds against her ribcage.
The town on a night of March is very dark and chilly, despite the illumination of the streetlamps. Anxiety swells up inside her with each step she takes into the darkness before her. She doesn't dare look back, fearing there's someone or something following her.
Thunder echoes throughout the edges of the sky. Fat drops of rain gradually fall to the ground. She pulls the hood over her head.
Finally, bright lights blind her eyes. Cars are passing by. Sakura spots a 24-hour fast food restaurant sign a few buildings away just across the street. She rushes to it beneath the pouring rain.
The warmth of the restaurant and the worker welcome her happily as if she had just returned from a long war. Standing by the door, she looks around the place. It is deserted but an old man hunching over his table, arm propped up against his face.
Putting her hands in her pockets, she realizes she had forgotten to bring money. She inwardly groans and curses herself. The thought of bringing money never once crossed her mind.
She stands awkwardly on the entrance, flashing a small smile at the cashier, who is expectantly looking at her. She glances around anxiously before looking back at the old man sitting alone. Her heart skips a beat. His gray, unkempt hair, and the clothes he wears seem familiar to her. She freezes in place, not knowing what to do.
She decides to run as far as she can in the pouring rain. As she is about to turn on her heel, the man looks at her direction and their eyes meet. Her gut isn't wrong. Hatake Kakashi is looking right at her with a weary face. He suddenly lights up and his lips curve into a small smile, his hand waving at her. Her hand rises up and waves back at him without her realizing it. It's too late to run away now.
Her feet start moving on their own toward him. She tries her best to walk normally, especially under his soft gaze, making sure not to make any awkward movements.
"What are you doing here?" she asks him out of curiosity, standing by his table with her hands behind her back.
"I should ask you the same thing since you're a sixteen-year-old girl and the city at night is very dangerous." He replies with the tone he usually uses to his students.
She pushes a wet strand of hair behind her ear. "I'm seventeen."
He chuckles apologetically.
"I can't sleep." She says softly.
He hums thoughtfully, resting his arm atop the other on the table. "Why don't you take a seat and have a little chat with me?"
It takes her a while to process his words until she finally complies. She sits down across him, her eyes staring at his veiny hands. She imagines the feeling of holding his hand in hers. Will she finally feel secure?
"So, why can't you sleep, Sakura?" he asks.
Chills run up her spine when he said her name with his deep, light-hearted voice. She sinks her fingers in the skin of her thighs.
"I always never can sleep on my birthday. It's been that way for as long as I can remember."
There is a sudden dark glimmer in his eyes when he says, "Excited to being closer to death?"
Sakura looks at him funny, earning him a half-hearted laugh from him. His shoulders shake as he laughs.
"Wow, sensei, I didn't know you can be that dark." She smirks humorously.
"I'm sorry," he is still recovering from his laughter, "let me rephrase that." He balls his fist in front of his mouth and clears his throat. "Excited to be seventeen?"
Hatake-sensei's intent gaze on her makes her cheeks flush and the corner of her lips curl into a small smile.
"I don't know. Maybe."
He takes a sip on his coffee. Looking at him drink makes her realize how thirsty she is. Her throat is dry and her lips are chapped. She doesn't want to ask him to lend her some money. It doesn't feel right.
"Seventeen is a great time to have fun—a great time to skip classes before worrying about university entrance exams. Although, I suggest you not to do that since I'm your teacher and all." He chuckles to himself, crinkling his eyes. "Listen to me, I sound like an old man."
The way he speaks about being seventeen sounds so foreign that Sakura isn't capable of believing the words that came out of his mouth. His eyes seem distant the way he's looking through her, as if he's desperately trying to grasp onto something. Yet, she smiles politely and agrees that he is an old man.
A hearty chuckle escapes his lips. He makes a pained look, clutching the fabric above his chest. "Ouch."
She giggles.
"Being seventeen is really fun." He repeats, looking at the space above her head. Again, his words sound empty.
"So, why are you here, sensei? I mean, why near my neighborhood?" she asks after a moment of silence passed between them.
"I live in a condo nearby." He says. "I like to come here and have a cup of coffee when I can't sleep. It's the only place that opens at this hour and the only fast-food chain that serves coffee."
"I don't think coffee helps you sleep, sensei." She tilts her head slightly to one side.
Hatake-sensei smiles softly. "You're right, actually. It keeps me awake. I prefer keeping my eyes open at all times instead of closed for a few minutes or hours."
His smile disappears soon after he said those words. His sudden change of demeanor makes her come up with a topic to avert his discomfort. She holds herself from scratching the top of her head.
"I didn't know you live around here," she finally says.
"Not many students know where I live."
"Am I the only one?" she grins excitedly.
"You and another kid from class B. Just the two of you guys. No one else."
Even though she isn't the only one, still it makes her feel thrilled on the inside. She feels special to know one more personal thing from him.
Then she asks him where he went to university, following with a string of questions, such as the major he took and things like where he attended high school. His eyes crinkle as he smiles and gladly answers her questions, recounting the best days he had as a high school and college student.
Much to her surprise, he never slacked off during high school. He was more hardworking than any of his classmates. He took literature in university. He likes to read books and write poetry when he's not working or grading papers and tests. His favorite books are the Icha Icha series, which she knows very well since he liked to read it back when she used to help him grade tests. Aside from erotica, he likes reading mystery and horror novels.
She feels happy that they can talk normally like this again after everything that has happened. There was a great relief that erupted from deep within her chest as she listens to his stories and speaks when he asks her back about her childhood. They talk for hours without stopping. It seems they never run out of topics to talk about.
However, there is one topic he clearly wants to avoid: family. Sakura asks him about his family, but the saddening of his eyes makes her realize that it was probably a bad idea.
"I don't have a family." He simply said. A smile was plastered on his face, but it didn't reach his dark eyes.
She apologized softly.
In between talking, Hatake-sensei often runs his fingers through his messy silver hair. Sakura marvels at how graceful he seems. She wonders what it feels like to run her fingers through his hair. It seems to be as soft as silk. She has to hold her hand down to keep it from reaching his head.
Some time during their conversation, the rain gradually stops. They are too busy drowning in each other's sentences to notice the ceasing sound of rain dripping against the pavement.
It is a little past four by the time Sakura finally feels drowsy. She tells him that she needs to go home so she can sleep and wake up late. He persistently insists on walking her home, even though she had tried to assure him that she would be fine.
"Aren't you scared of getting raped?" he asks her, to which she immediately shuts her mouth.
In the end, she gives up and lets him walk her home. When they come out of the restaurant together, fewer cars pass by. They were probably returning back to the comfort of their homes from a wild night out downtown. She looks around, sniffing the air, and smiles to herself. There is something exquisite about the way the streets are after it has rained.
"Is it really okay for you to walk me home, sensei?" she asks.
"It's all right. I don't want anything to happen to my favorite student." He says in a singsong tone as he lowers the hood from her head to ruffle her hair.
His cheerfulness radiates and affects her throughout their walk. She is intoxicated by the great vibe he is emitting. She wants things with him to stay this way forever. She likes being affected by that feeling of a different kind of happiness when she's with him—it's the same feeling she gets when she visited Hinata.
"Thank you for walking me home, sensei," she thanks him shyly once they reach her gate.
"It's my pleasure, Sakura." He says with a broad smile on his face, bowing before her as if he is Prince Charming and she's the Princess.
She holds her hands behind her back. She slightly bows her head, hiding the bright shade of red tainted on her cheeks away from him. She's not about to go inside just yet.
"About what you said earlier…after the party…" she begins slowly. "What do you mean by that?"
There is a short pause from Hatake-sensei. Sakura bites her lower lip and brings herself to look at him in the eye. His face is unshaken, but his eyes tell her otherwise. He looks desperate to tell her something, but he's holding himself back. She softens her gaze at him, thinking it will help him to open up.
"I've hurt many people in my time, Sakura, and I don't want to repeat the same mistake with you." He lightly shrugs his shoulders. "But I did and it made me think that I'm not capable of making things right."
A million questions race around her head: one of them being if he has feelings for her.
"I some times don't see you as my student." He confesses as if he had read her mind, however it doesn't really answer the question she has.
"What do you mean by that, sensei?"
He remains unfazed, not even once does he takes his gaze away from her.
"What I mean is that you're someone different to me, Sakura. I care about you very much. And I'm sorry for hurting your feelings with how I acted around you."
She suddenly feels the warmth of his hand on the side of her face. His thumb lightly caresses her cheek. Her legs start to feel like jelly as she looks deeply into his dark eyes. His face is so close she can feel his breath on her.
"It's fine," she manages to say very softly, watching him slightly tilting his head to one side.
Slowly she closes her eyes, anticipating for their lips to touch. She feels his soft lips on the corner of hers. She freezes in place, indulging on the feeling of his lips close to hers. His other hand reaches for her neck to bring her closer to him, pulling his lips away from her, and she rests her face on his chest. Somehow, she never wants this to end.