I am not apologizing for the puns you are about to read later in this chapter.
edited 9/4/18 - Rewrote part of the opening diary entry
The Chief Consul's Diary
By Bilbo-sama
Entry 12 - Purreparations
[FROM THE DIARY OF ROLAND CRANE]
Nature's Tongue is an unexpected addition to Evan's spellcasting. When cast, the spell includes the caster's companions so they can also follow the conversation (though it may be Evan subconsciously including us). So far Nature's Tongue has revealed that the whamsters around Evermore have come to respect Evan's strength and his ability to lead which is why they have left Evan's 'nest' alone these days. The skeleplasms are fighting each other in hopes that one day, one of them could challenge Evan to a duel. Somehow, neither of these two types of creatures are aware of what the other feels about Evermore.
Evan has turned his sights on a similar spell called Spirit Medium. The spell allegedly allows you to speak with spirits and gain insight from their perspective of the past. My world has many stories about why attempting to speak with supernatural beings is a terrible idea but, alas, my and Leander's efforts to dissuade him has failed. The best we can do is ban researchers from going beyond from this spell and encourage them to look into any exorcism incantations we may need as a result of consorting with spirits.
Day 222/November 1, 20XX
It was decided that visiting Goldpaw's library would help Leander learn how the world outside of Hydropolis progressed in the past three centuries. As long as he was accompanied by Evan or one of the others, Boddly would allow him to venture further inside the library and read her 'bookie-wookies.'
A passing dog man told Roland that somebody wanted to speak with him so he was unable to be Leander's 'guardian.'
"Oh, it's too bad Mr. Crane hasn't returned today," said a librarian assistant before sighing in disappointment, "I was hoping to catch a glimpse..."
"Why?" asked Evan, curious.
"Because," she said dreamily, "I have never seen a man work so hard in deciphering a tablet!"
Lofty and Evan glanced at each other in confusion.
"What?" said Lofty.
"Yesterday he was reading one of our tablets and writing down in a book he brought with him. He must be working on a better translation because the last time I read it, the translator made it out to be an account of somebody visiting a strange world where people travel in large metal machines the inhabitants call 'cars' and no one there uses magic!"
"That is odd," Evan commented diplomatically, knowing of Roland's origins.
But wait...Roland can use magic even though it's limited to a few spells. Is it because he's been living in this world for at least half a year?
"It is!" the assistant agreed, unaware of Evan's confusion, "I even asked Madame Boddly about redoing the tablet's translation charms but she said it was accurate! Now if your Chief Consul thinks that the translation is bad, then maybe she would let somebody fix it."
"Where is this tablet of youers?" asked Lofty.
"Oh, its over here," the assistant declared, going around a round edge and entered a small nook of books that had its own reading table. She removed the tablet from the shelf and left it on the table. "I'll be around if you need anything." She wandered off.
Evan looked around and saw no one around. He picked up Lofty and placed him on the table. The Kingmaker looked over the tablet and spent some time 'hmmm'-ing as he read it.
"Well, Lofty?" Evan said at last.
"Translation spell is correct all right," Lofty frowned, "but there's a few layers underneath that one."
"Really?"
"Oooh yeah, mun, looks like everybody hasn't flippin' agreed on what it says for centuries. Crikey, some even gotten forcibly weaker because the next translator didn't like what their predecessor flippin' did. Flip, I understand why the one from 800 years ago is almost gone. It's caster refused to use a universal language and instead went for their mother tongue."
"Why would they do that?"
"Hmmm...most likely because they were more fluent in that language ," he hopped off the table, "Welp, no need to worry ourselves over this one."
"But..." Evan wanted to know more but Lofty was no longer interested. Any further attempts at this topic came to a halt as a loud noise assaulted his ears, "Ow!"
"Evan!" Tani ran over once she noticed the king hunched over in pain, "what happened?"
"I don't know," Evan straightened up as he registered that the noise was gone. "There was this noise."
"I didn't hear anything," Tani shook her head, confused.
"Crikey!" Lofty looked around, "looks like you weren't the only one, Evan!" He pointed out the dogfolk who also had covered their ears and were now asking each other what that was about.
The source of the noise had stuffed her Viewer into her pocket and sheepishly headed for the employee break room.
[MEANWHILE ON LEAFBOOK]
(Self Portrait of Roland in traditional Goldpaw warrior robes)
Roland: Several months ago, my colleagues and I helped defeat a windwyrm that was terrorizing families visiting the area around Capstan-Upon-Hull. Today I received a thank you gift that had taken several months to make.
Yu Sei: Nice!
Lili: Is it really comfortable as it looks?
Roland: Yes, it is.
Ro Var: Glad you like it!
[MEANWHILE ON A PRIVATE BOARD]
Di Di: AAAAAAAAAAAAA-
Linda: AAAAAAAAAAAA-
Tiffany: EEEEEEEEEEEEE-
Bracken: Wait what happened? Oh.
[MEANWHILE IN BROADLEAF]
"Huh. It suits him. Probably," Bracken decided before typing in her next message.
Bracken: :O
The Evermore delegation regrouped in the throne room where everyone complimented Roland's gifted outfit before getting down to business.
"It appears that methods of crossing the ocean crevasses have been forgotten in the past three hundred years," reported Leander, looking at the world map. Ding Dong Dell and Goldpaw he could recognize but Broadleaf's inclusion and Al Mamoon's absence on the map appears to be recent.
"You mean those giant cracks in the ocean?" said Tani, "Boss always warned us to not fly over those."
"With good reason, girlie," Batu lectured, "those cracks are pretty deep with no way of getting out if you crash down there."
"They block all the ways to Broadleaf," Roland pointed out.
"Can't we just fly?" asked Evan.
"Nay, our air craft aren't built for distances of that nature," Batu frowned.
Leander smiled, "No need to fly. We can just have the boat leap over them."
He received five shocked looks from that suggestion.
"...What?" Roland said finally.
Leander adjusted his glasses, hiding his embarrassment, "Forgive me, I had forgotten that while this method is an everyday sight in Hydropolis, it was lost to time for the rest of the world."
"Can you make our boat do that anyway?" queried Evan.
"Of course. It would require certain modifications but with my guidance and the proper facilities, it can be done."
Day 225/November 4, 20XX
It took three days to modify the ship. In that time, research into the spell Spirit Medium was completed (to Batu, Roland, and Leander's great concern but to Lili and Speio, the idea of speaking with ghosts was fascinating), Fai Do and Gene completed several orders for the upcoming winter, Thetis learned key differences in non-merfolk anatomy, and architects finished drawing up plans to expanding the kingdom and the castle. One of the major changes to the castle was that the suites in the residential wing would have more space for new rooms to the occupant's desire.
"A bedroom I guess," Roland suggested when an architect gathered everyone in the wing's hallway, "You get more privacy that way."
"It'll probably be quieter too," mused Lady Penelope, "So you can't hear your neighbor rant to their own self after midnight." She pretended to not notice how the Earl's gray fur puffed up in embarrassed anger.
"Well, it doesn't look any different," Tani commented as they looked over the ship in the harbor, "but that's magic for you."
"Then why not take it for a test drive, mun?" Lofty suggested.
"I believe there's a crevice north of here," said Leander while Roland pulled out his map and handed it over, "We'll use that one."
"Oh gods," moaned Batu as he realized that it was too late to back out now. Another bout of seasickness was on the horizon.
"Well," declared Roland after the boat successfully leapt over a crevice, "I'm not sure if magic won this round or if the laws of physics did."
"Why not both?" said Lofty.
The boat sailed left and entered the string of mountainous islands and the green plateaus Roland and Evan eventually recognized as places they flew by when they journeyed to the Cradle of Light in hopes of finding a Kingmaker.
"What's that over there?" Evan pointed.
"...A cave, lad," Batu deadpanned.
"I sense something in there," Leander frowned, "however, its not a tainted monster."
"Cave it is, then," sighed Lofty as the ship drifted towards it.
The cave contained a fangfish and a treasure chests full of gold. A unearthly wail heralding a ghost sounded.
"My apologies," said Roland to the ghostly ball of flame floating off the ground, "We weren't aware it was yours."
The ghost responded with another wail. Evan frowned before his eyes lit up.
"Oh hang on! Spectra!" There was an intricate circle that started beneath the boy's feet before it spread to include his companions and the ghost. The light that ensued blinded everyone for a moment before it died down.
"Hello?" said a voice and they all looked to see that in the ghost's place was a transparent grimalkin dressed as a sea captain.
"Blimey," gaped Tani, "it worked."
"So this is Spirit Medium," observed Roland, "it would've been nice if you gave us the heads up first, Evan."
Evan's tail drooped, chastised.
"I am surpurrised to have visitors after all this time," said the ghost, "it's just been me and the sea monster that killed me."
"What were ye doin' here?" asked Batu while Lofty muttered, "Oh flippin' heck, here we go."
"I was burying my treasure before Purrince Marcassin the Second's forces could capture me. How was I supposed to know the ship was the Purrince's purrsonal boat?"
"Er..." replied Evan reluctantly.
"So this world once had the sea kind of pirates," Roland mused to himself.
"Pirate? No! I was a Purrivateer under the service of Queen Moocia," the ghost corrected before shrugging, "though purrhaps after that incident, Her Moojesty declined to speak on my behalf to save face. Politics, you see."
"Aye," agreed Batu, "which is why we air pirates spent hundreds of years without alignin' ourselves to anyone until recently."
"I am pleased you choose Dellian royalty," said the ghost indicating to Evan, "but tell me, child, why did you choose that as your Kingmaker?"
"Lofty just...appeared when I succeeded with my trials," said Evan.
"So he was your purrize," confirmed the ghost.
"I'm not anyone's flippin' prize, mun!"
"My apologies, I did not mean to anger you, Kingmaker, but your kind was indeed considered a purrecious purrize. In my time, some kingdoms used to claim their conquered neighbors' Kingmakers if they survived the war. It took a team of highly skilled sorcerers to purrfectly merge the Kingmakers together into one."
"That doesn't sound like fun," commented Lofty.
"I suppose it was not in the Kingmakers' purrspective," agreed the ghost, "but it looks like nobody has purrformed that lately."
"And thank flippin' goodness for that!"
"Since your king defeated my slayer, you may claim my treasure as your purrize. I purrfer that you do."
"Um, thank you," said Evan.
"I have no need of it, since I'm dead. Purrhaps I should move on. Farewell." At this, the ghost suddenly dissipated.
"Well...that was interesting," commented Leander, "that speech pattern hasn't been spoken for two and half centuries when I was born."
Everyone did their best to ignore the implications of being in a cave for at least five hundred years.
"What should we do with the gold?" asked Evan at last.
"We keep it, lad," Batu decided, "we killed a powerful monster, we win its prize."
"You mean 'purrize,'" smirked Roland, earning a laugh from Batu in response.
"What should we do now?" wondered Tani as they all headed to the boat with the chest.
"Purrhaps," said Batu casually, "we return home."
Tani and Leander sighed.
"Can we flippin' not?" whined Lofty.
"Might as well appurreciate that no one expurressed themselves this way anymore," grinned Batu.
"It's a purrfect oppurrtunity to get it all out before we get back," added Roland.
"Okay but I purrfectly understand why this stopped," said Evan innocently while Tani glared at him, "It's really hard to purrpetuate a purrcise speech pattern like this one."
Day 226/November 5, 20XX
"What's Broadleaf like as a country?" Batu asked the next day when they gathered to discuss their next move.
"According to my studies, it's a kingdom founded on a mysterious art called science," Leander replied before noticing Roland's surprised-confused expression. "What's wrong?"
"It's...ah...hard to explain but," Roland began, "ah, where I'm from, science is widely used and magic is considered fictional." Leander stared at him in great confusion. 'Where he's from?'
"Anyway, I'm surprised that Broadleaf's discoveries aren't more widespread." Roland quickly added.
"They indeed aren't," Leander reluctantly agreed, "the Leafbook viewers and advances in medicine are so far the most widely used exports from Broadleaf."
"How did the viewers mesh with the time spell?" asked Tani.
"Somehow they didn't interfere with the spells holding Hydropolis in stasis. We currently have senior priests and priestesses experimenting to figure out why."
"Interestin' but who is the royal swab in charge?" said Batu.
"Zip Vector, CEO turned President who raised a small company into a great industrial nation practically overnight with his ingenuity," recalled Roland.
"Alas," added Leander, "things don't seem to be going well for him as of late. There have been reports of political unrest and discontent citizens."
"So another country with problems," commented Evan as he placed his fist under his chin in thought, not noticing that Roland has done the same and Leander was raising an eyebrow at both of them.
"Another fine mess is waiting for us," added Roland.
"So...whose going on the boat this time?" Tani piped up.
"Roland," Batu said immediately.
"Wait, what?" said Roland.
"Rrrrroland," agreed Lofty.
"You can do it, Roland!" grinned Tani.
"The others have made up their minds, Roland," observed Leander.
"Ah, good luck, Roland," said Evan a tad nervously.
Roland looked around helplessly before sighing.
"Well, this is just purrfect."
[MEANWHILE]
"About damn time," said Doloran as he viewed Evermore in his scrying cauldron. Now he can speed up the process with President Vector so the Kingsbond could be ready by the time King Evan enters Broadleaf...
I regret purrcisely nothing.
So uh, this chapter's diary entry mentioned an incident with spirit medium and puns but I had terrible writer's block that I spent an hour playing Wrath of the White Witch, got inspired, and decided to write the incident out with all the puns I could possibly fit...And throw in a history lesson. Why not I guess.
Anyway, I remembered the Samurai outfit you get for Side Quest 30, which happened several months ago plot wise. I guess it takes this long to make a garment that actually fits the guy who solved your dragon problem. orz