Chapter 14
Caroline's eyes fell at the clock. 5:02 a.m. Sighing at how slow time seemed to be going Caroline remembered being downstairs with Damon just a few minutes ago. And now she couldn't fall back asleep, her thoughts battling with each other causing a constant pounding at the sides of her head. She was actually afraid to fall asleep due to the fact that she'd dream again, she'd dream about him… Rolling her eyes at the pathetic attitude that braced her, Caroline slowly struggled off the bed, definitely not sleeping now. Caroline made her way towards the bathroom, deciding on taking a shower.
He could hear the sounds of her feet slowly and quietly making their way towards the end of the hallway above him. He was slightly confused until he heard the water turn on in the bathroom. Body softening slightly Damon looked over at the clock across the room. 5:11 a.m.
Damon couldn't sleep either, he didn't know why but sudden tiredness had just disappeared… it's not like he'd been sleeping any better before anyway…
It was true that he wasn't sleeping well for a long period of time now, but he wasn't the only one. He knew Caroline wasn't either… and he knew exactly why she wasn't sleeping…
Because of him.
Jaw clenching slightly, Damon practically rolled off the couch as he headed up the stairs. Hands rubbing at his face, Damon made his way towards Evangeline's room to briefly check up on the little girl. Smiling at the sight of her cuddling next to her teddy bear, Damon closed the door once again before heading for the other room. Passing by the bathroom, Damon's brows arched at the fact that the shower wasn't running any more. Walking into their bedroom, Damon headed into the dark room, lazily avoiding the light switch as he entered the room.
Heading to the dresser, Damon opened it to come across clothes. The darkness of the room didn't really allow Damon to correctly see exactly which t-shirt he was grabbing. But it's not like he exactly cared now did he, so he randomly picked a blue t-shirt off the shelf.
Wrapping the white towel around herself, Caroline sighed as she ran her fingers through her wet blonde hair. Picking up her previous clothes from the ground, Caroline tossed it towards the bin which carried all the dirty clothing in the other corner of the bathroom. Grabbing hold of her towel, Caroline eyed herself in the mirror quickly before holding onto the door of the bathroom as she slowly walked towards the bedroom.
Shivering slightly at the coldness at the other side of the door, Caroline simply held onto the towel tighter around her naked and wet form. Walking into the dark room, Caroline flicked at the light switch causing the brightness of the light to slightly pain Caroline's eyes. Eyes wandering, Caroline froze at the sudden movement at the other side of the room. Caroline eyes seemed to be staring into another pair of wide eyes that stared back at her.
Damon's eyes widened at the fact that Caroline stood in front of him in nothing but a towel… plus the fact that she was clearly not expecting him to be in the room was probably slightly scaring.
"D-Damon, what are you doing awake?" Caroline managed to get out as she awkwardly looked down at her partially naked self.
Forcing himself to not let his eyes wander inappropriately, Damon looked at Caroline, "I could ask you the same thing…"
Internally kicking herself to snap out of it, Caroline replied slightly nervous, "Yeah, I couldn't sleep so I just thought that maybe a quick shower would help me fall asleep… but what are you…" Caroline trailed off as she noticed that Damon had now put on a t-shirt. Noticing Caroline's travelling eyes, Damon smiled back at her, "I couldn't sleep either."
"Oh."
An awkward silence pressed between the two before Damon broke the silence, "Well, I should go… uh, try falling asleep again…"
Damon watched as Caroline's expression seemed to change, a more curious and thoughtful look played on her naked face. About to move from his original spot, Damon froze once again at Caroline's response.
"Stay," Caroline said, looking at Damon who seemed to freeze at what she said. Watching as he seemed to look at her in confusion and shock, Caroline decided to continue as she explained, "I'm sure Evangeline would love it, and we'd also be playing along… just… sleep here… with me…" Caroline finished swallowing hard, waiting for Damon to react in any sort of way while awkwardly gripping at her towel, still frozen.
Taken aback from Caroline's offer, Damon had to force himself to respond, his voice extremely unsure as he spoke. "Are you serious?" Damon asked, his voice slightly rising in pitch near the end of the question. He had no idea what exactly was happening right now; he was confused, shocked and slightly relieved.
Caroline couldn't help but chuckle slightly at Damon's voice cracking. Yes. Yes she was serious. Like she had said before… she was done with Damon Salvatore, she wasn't going to let her feelings get the best of her anymore. And if she had to play along and be his wife in order to go back home, she will do it.
She will play along.
"Yeah… it's just sleeping on a bed together… it's not like we're doing anything…" Caroline said trailing off as she slowly relaxed from her tense form, making her way closer to Damon so that she could get her clothes from the dresser as well.
Damon watched as Caroline stood at his side, looking through the dresser casually as she continued to grip at her towel.
"S-Should I stand out for a while… let you change…?" Damon asked hesitantly, not making any eye contact with the woman beside him as he simply continued to stare straight ahead.
Glancing at Damon's form next to her, Caroline chuckled slightly, "No, it's alright… just turn around."
Brows arching at that, Damon slowly turned his back to the blonde as he tried his best in not letting his thoughts wander at the fact that Caroline's naked form was a few feet behind him.
Jumping slightly at her voice, Damon's body tensed as he tried to hear what exactly was being said from the blonde.
"Do you mind if I wear one of your shirts?" Caroline's tired voice rang from behind him. Damon's jaws clenched slightly as he nodded his head in disagreement, "No, go ahead…"
Grabbing hold of the longest t-shirt she could find, Caroline pocked her head through the cloth that seemed to drape down at her body. The worn out grey shirt seemed to stop at the upper part of her thigh, successfully covering the new underwear that Caroline managed to get on, the rest of her long legs clearly visible to the human eye.
Drying off her partly wet hair with the towel, Caroline glanced back at Damon who still seemed to be facing the other side of the room.
"You can turn around now," Caroline simply said as she took the towel away from her hair, placing it on the dresser's door and slowly walked to the other side of the room, nearing the bed.
Hesitantly turning around, Damon's stomach flopped at Caroline's appearance. His eyes danced around her visible legs, as his shirt barely covered her completely. Damon watched (slightly dumbfounded) as Caroline neared the bed, slowly getting herself covered under the sheets.
Damon didn't know exactly what to do, the last thing he thought that would happen when he had come up here was the fact that Caroline would ask him to sleep on the bed with her… he was just hoping to put on a shirt and stay awake until the sun finally chose to rise. And now in this situation, Damon had no idea what to do… but what bothered him the most was the fact that he was so awkward and weird around Caroline these days. He seemed to be so hesitant and almost afraid to go anywhere near her… almost like he was afraid of hurting her again….
That pissed him off the most.
Damon's eyes met Caroline's blue ones that looked back at him with slight concern. His blood boiled at the fact that Caroline knew exactly why he was always so hesitant. She knew he was scared and confused, and yet she continued to push him into her direction over and over.
But he also knew that she was only doing this to play along… she was only doing this because that's what she thought he wanted. He wanted this right? He wanted to get back to the real world… hope for normal…? But why did this feel so right? Why did this world (or whatever it is) feel so right to him? Why did his life here with a daughter, a happy brother, and a wife… feel so right to him?
Jaw clenching hard at his thoughts, Damon's body tensed slightly as he tried to run away from all his thoughts and questions once again. Looking back at Caroline who still seemed to be looking his way slightly concerned Damon rolled his eyes internally before slowly tugging off the blue shirt that he had just recently put on. Placing it back into the dresser, Damon looked over at Caroline who seemed to have looked away from his now visible torso. Grinning slightly at the sudden feeling of slight victory, Damon looked down at his grey sweat pants that he currently wore. Grin growing, Damon slowly peeled his pants off of him, causing him to stand in only boxers. The sudden victory that arose in Damon's mind slightly disgusted him, but if she was going to play this way… so was he…
He was going to play along.
Walking towards the bed, Damon kept his eyes on the blonde who seemed to totally avoid any eye contact with him, a small shade of red forming slightly at her cheeks. Slowly lying down next to her on the bed, Damon covered himself with the sheets.
Turning his head at Caroline's direction, Damon grinned at the blonde that now looked directly at him. "What? Don't want to cuddle?" Damon asked, grin growing. Caroline's brows arched at the sudden change in behaviour with Damon. Rolling her eyes internally, Caroline managed to shoot a sarcastic smile at his direction, "Funny."
Serious again, Caroline looked down at Damon's form, "So how does the famous Damon hold a girl?" Caroline asked looking back at the grinning Damon. Caroline watched Damon's brows arch high as he responded, "That is weird question to ask." Caroline sighed in frustration, "We don't really have a choice here Damon, and we've got to play along…" Damon's brows furrowed at the blonde. "And I am playing along, don't really have a choice now do we?" Damon asked his voice slightly harsh at the end of his rhetorical question. A grin started to from at Damon's face once again at the annoyed expression that started to bounce off of Caroline's features.
Turning herself away from Damon, Caroline now lay with her back facing him as a few words seemed to escape her mouth. "You're impossible," she muttered under her breath, causing Damon's grin to fade, his expression softening. Hesitant at first Damon started, "You have no idea how hard this is for me…" Brows furrowing at what Damon had said, Caroline turned around, so that she was now facing Damon who seemed to be sincerely looking her direction. But before she could say anything, Damon started once again, "I don't want to hurt you again Caroline… I'm not strong enough to see you hurt all because of me… I'm scared of that and you know it."
Face softening; Caroline said nothing as she eyed Damon's confused and hesitant form. "Everything that happened between us… I… All the things I said and did…" Damon trailed off as he ripped his gaze away from Caroline and at the ceiling above him, "…and the things you said…"
"I love you," Caroline stated softly causing Damon's head to shoot her direction, his eyes studying her as he tried his best in ignoring the sudden butterflies that flew at his stomach at her words. "I love you… I told you that I was in love with you that night…"
Tense form relaxing, Damon nodded slowly, only to have Caroline's soft voice continue, "…and you made it super clear that night Damon that you didn't… you didn't love me, and you never will…"
Damon's eyes softened at the expressionless Caroline before him, "Caroline-"
Caroline smiled up at Damon, as she returned his gaze. "It's alright Damon… I was stupid… you're in love with Elena… you always have been and I shouldn't have thought that you would think differently…" Caroline added, interrupting Damon.
Damon's eyebrows knitted together as he tried to register exactly what Caroline was saying. Jaw clenching, Damon didn't know what to say next.
"Like you said, who could ever love me?" Caroline whispered her voice so faint allowing the pain to be hidden from what she had just said.
Damon's eyes widened slightly at her words. No. No… he didn't mean any of what he had said that night. No. She can't think like that, he didn't— No.
His stomach turned at the fact that the woman before him showed no emotion whatsoever, her once warm and gentle blue eyes now with a slight coldness to them… No.
"That is not true," Damon stated firmly, his chest aching silently as he stared at the woman before him. Caroline looked up at Damon, her eyes slowly fluttering closed as she nodded her head, "It is. It is true… everything you said that night was the truth… and it's okay because I'm completely fine. You don't have to worry about me because I'm fine, okay?" Caroline asked, trying her best in not letting her feelings take over. She wasn't going to have that happen to her. She was going to be strong. She wasn't going to allow Damon wiggle his way into her heart again. She wasn't.
Receiving no more than a concerned expression from Damon, Caroline sighed before turning back around so that she was no longer facing him again. "I'm fine," she muttered one last time before letting her eyes seal shut.
Damon could feel himself starting to wake up, grunting slightly, Damon unknowingly snuggled further into Caroline. Sighing in contentment, Damon's hold on her seemed to loosen slightly. Damon lying behind her, his hand seemed to be holding one of her hands as they spooned. Sighing in contentment at the feeling of warmth, Damon's eyes fluttered open only to have his brows furrow.
Oh god.
Swallowing hard, Damon noticed the lack of distance between the two. Damon planned on moving away from Caroline before she were to wake up, but his thoughts were interrupted as he stared at his hand and hers. Damon smiled unknowingly at how right it looked to have Caroline's hand in his. Distracted by his thoughts, Damon didn't notice Caroline awake.
Caroline unknowingly snuggled further into Damon, her eyes fluttering open at the feeling of refreshment over taking her body. She actually slept. Eyes wandering, Caroline's brows furrowed slightly at the sight of her hand in Damon's and yet she didn't flinch or move out of his touch. She could now feel him against her but she said and did nothing. Sighing internally, Caroline managed to turn her form around so that she was facing Damon.
Holding in a breath of air, Damon watched as the blonde's bright eyes fluttered open only to come in contact with his wide eyes simply a few inches away from her.
Taking in breath Caroline let her eyes to quickly trail Damon's face, confused at the awestruck expression on his face, Caroline spoke, "What time is it?"
Getting pulled away from his thoughts, Damon was cut off before he could respond, "It's 12:56 in the afternoon, Mommy…"
Turning her head towards the bedroom door Caroline and Damon spotted Evangeline running into the bedroom, a huge smile on her face as she spotted her parents in each other's arms. Sighing internally at Evangeline's expression, Caroline knew she made the right decision when asking Damon to sleep with her on the bed. Gaining a smile from the little girl was worth the entire struggle.
Watching as Evangeline jumped onto the bed towards her parents, Caroline looked over at Damon who still seemed to have a firm grip on her. Clearing her throat slightly Caroline watched as Damon looked down at her only to have his grip on her loosen allowing her to turn onto her back. Sitting up Caroline laughed as she held onto the pouncing blond in front of her.
Watching the two beautiful blondes before him giggle as they started to talk about the rest of the day, Damon couldn't help but allow a smile to form on his lips. Sitting up himself, Damon looked over at the clock as he recalled they had one more hour to get ready for Evangeline's school meeting.
Looking back at Caroline and Evangeline, Damon spoke, "I think we should start heading out soon if we're going to make the meeting…"
Evangeline looked towards her father, huffing in a breath, "Yeah, don't want to get late because Mommy and Daddy were too busy snuggling in bed…"
Arching his brows at the miniature blonde, Damon watched as Caroline giggled slightly at the blonde as she kissed her cheek, "Alright let's get Mommy ready since you've gotten ready yourself today…"
"I also made breakfast for you and Daddy," Evangeline said cheerfully as she practically pulled Caroline off the bed. Getting off the bed along with the two blonds, Damon rubbed at his eyes as he attempted to follow Caroline and Evangeline out the bedroom door.
One thing was for sure… that was the best night's sleep Damon had had in a very long time…
Damon groaned in frustration as he struggled in trying to button up his dress shirt. Heck he was even having trouble in buttoning his jeans. There's only so much you could do with one free hand. Cursing at his casted hand, Damon glanced around the bedroom before slamming the dresser that stood behind him.
Freezing at the door of the bedroom when hearing the huge bang, Caroline watched as Damon struggled with his shirts button, cursing under his breath as he did so.
Taking in a huge breath of air, Caroline found the courage to speak up as she neared his oblivious form. "Trying to break your other hand now?" Caroline asked, as she caught Damon's attention.
Damon rolled his eyes at the blond while continuing to attack his shirt. "No, of course not," Damon's annoyed voice ringed through the air.
Sighing at the man before her, Caroline nodded her head to the side before slipping in front of Damon while taking hold of his two hands.
Eyes shooting up at Caroline, Damon's eyes narrowed at the blond, "What are you—"
Before he could finish his sentence he felt Caroline's hands leave his as she started to button up his dress shirt. Eyes widening slightly Damon glanced back up at Caroline who seemed to be clearly comfortable with what she was doing. Brows furrowing slightly Damon simply watched her as she continued to button up his dress shirt.
Caroline could feel his eyes on her which made her fumble with the buttons while she did them, trying her best in not focusing on his hard and bare skin that practically lay below her fingers. She constantly cursed herself over and over, reminding herself to play along, reminding herself that she no longer was going to allow Damon Salvatore to get between her and her emotions.
Focus Caroline. Focus…
Damon watched as Caroline was done buttoning up his dress shirt, her expressionless form now somehow hesitant as she looked back up at him, their eyes meeting. "Um… your jeans…"
Damon's eyes widened as he came to conclusion, "Oh… right…" Reaching for his jeans, Damon once again started to fumble with the button, wanting so desperately for the button to go through. Sighing Damon gave up, "Nope, that's not happening…"
Focus Caroline…
Huffing in a breath of annoyance as Damon continued to fumble with the button, Caroline slapped his free hand away before quickly grabbing hold of the button and slipping it through the small jean slot; all simply catching Damon off guard.
Looking back up at Damon Caroline's eyes widened at the fact that she had just did that. Why did I just do that?! Oh my god, he's looking at me, why is he looking at me?… oh god, his eyes are like the gateway to my soul— Why did I just do that?!
"And I have no idea why I just did that…" Caroline began out loud, her eyes still wide as she stared at Damon in slight terror. Regaining his composure Damon cleared his throat slightly as he awkwardly shifted his weight, "N-No it's alright…"
Caroline's brows furrowed suddenly at the soft tone that came from the Salvatore, "I'm so sor—"
Damon chuckled softly, cutting Caroline off while bringing his free hand to Caroline's cheek, "It's alright Blondie…"
Caroline froze at the feeling of his hand at her cheek, the warmness that extracted from the hand bringing chills to her spine. The shivers only seemed to grow at the fact that he had called her 'Blondie'… she hadn't heard that from him in a long time. She could feel her breath start to race… NO.
No! She hated feeling this way! She hated having to confront these moments between them and then have to force herself to forget them after. Every time she tried to shut herself off there would be these moments that she would lose herself just for a moment… she tries so hard to confront these moments and to ignore them… but they always happen, no matter how many times she tried to tell herself otherwise.
There was no way to stop these moments…
Hand moving slightly at Caroline's cheek, Damon had no idea why he did such a thing. Slowly bringing his hand away from Caroline's face, Damon eyed her as she seemed deep in thought.
Why did I do that?
Why was it that whenever he was around her… he wasn't in control over himself anymore… why was it that whenever he was around her… his heart raced faster and faster…?
Snapping out of his thoughts Damon sighed as he brought his hand back to his side. "We should go… Evangeline's waiting downstairs…"
Caroline looked back up at Damon, nodding slowly as she processed everything he said. "R-Right…"
Stepping away from Caroline, Damon turned around, as he started to walk towards the bedroom door.
Fighting with her thoughts, Caroline watched as Damon walked closer to the door.
There had to be a way to stop these moments… the only way to be able to 'play along' and to not let either of their feelings to get in this alternate reality was to find a way to stop these moments from happening once and for all!
"Damon," Caroline called out loud causing Damon to stop mid walk. Turning around Damon looked back at Caroline who seemed to have no idea what to say next.
Caroline had no idea why she called out for him… all she knew was that she had to… she eyed him as his eyes narrowed at her, "What's wrong Care?"
'Care'…? He called me Care…
THAT'S IT!
Damon's brows furrowed in confusion as he watched Caroline practically running towards him. "What are you—"
Cutting himself off Damon watched as Caroline hastily took hold of the collars of his dress shirt and pulled on them allowing Caroline's lips to meet his. Eyes practically popping out of his head, Damon seemed to be caught off guard as Caroline flushed against him, her lips still moving in motion with his. Damon could feel his heart starting to beat faster now, his senses no longer present as his eyes started to flutter closed, his head moving further towards Caroline as his lips started to move in rhythm with her's.
Caroline sighed into the kiss her thoughts lost while one of her hands made it to the back of Damon's neck and the other at his collar, both bringing him further towards her. Placing his hands around her waist, Damon practically lifted Caroline off the ground as she now barely stood on her toes.
Damon could feel his heart beat rising as he only seemed to kiss Caroline back more and more passionately; flashes of all the moments he and Caroline had shared calculating through his mind.
Caroline could feel Damon's tongue at her lips, begging for access. Parting her lips, Caroline took in what Damon had to offer. Hands playing through his hair, Caroline found herself pulling at it, causing a soft grunt to escape Damon's mouth.
The kiss dimming, Damon and Caroline's lips gently moved with one another's.
Slowly parting their lips from one another, Caroline and Damon allowed their eyes to open once again. Damon's eyes remained locked with Caroline's while he still held her in his arms. Slowing placing her back onto the ground, he didn't remove his eyes or arms off of her.
Glancing between Caroline's eyes and full lips, Damon tried to recall just what had happened. Swallowing hard Damon tried to ease his breathing as his chest heaved in unison with Caroline's.
Caroline had just kissed him... And he kissed her back...
Caroline didn't know what to say as she simply never let her eyes leave Damon's. She knew he wanted to kiss her again because of all the glances he continued to give to her lips, and the fact that they were still so close to each other wasn't helping either. What scared her though was the fact that she wanted to kiss him again too...
Inwardly cursing herself at her thoughts, Caroline slowly brought her hands away from the back of Damon's neck causing him to instantly loosen his grip on her waist, his now simply resting gently at her hips.
Studying Damon's face, Caroline could see the slight confusion in his expression along with curiosity. Caroline had no idea why she had kissed him… At that moment it just seemed like the right thing to do...
In a way Caroline thought that kissing Damon would help her be able to confront specific moments between the two... She thought that if she were to kiss him... The moments would stop...
Because she knew that every time these moments had occurred, the only thing she wanted to do was kiss him… and now that she had kissed him… the moments should stop now… right?
Right?
"W-Why'd you just do that…?" Damon asked softly, his expression still dazed as he looked down at Caroline. He didn't know what to feel at that very moment… all he knew for sure was that he wanted to crash his lips against hers again and again and again… again…
"I don't know…" Caroline replied with a whisper, her hands gently placed at his chest. Caroline finally let a bit of realization hit her, she had just kissed him, she had just kissed Damon Salvatore…
"I…I-I just thought that if I kissed you… the moments would stop…" Caroline whispered out again, clearly shocked at what she had just did. Brows knitting together, Damon questioned, still completely dazed, "Moments?" Biting down at her lower lip, Caroline nodded, her eyes constantly bouncing at his eyes and lips. "Y-Yeah… the moments where you'd make my heart race…" Caroline finished softly, her gentle eyes locked with his.
Damon's eyes softened at that, his arms still secured around her. "Why would you want those to stop?" Damon asked breathlessly, the curiosity getting the best of him. Plus he knew exactly what she was talking about. There would be these particular moments where Caroline would make his heart race… her gazes, her smile, her kindness… all of it overwhelmed him…
Caroline stared up at Damon, she watched quietly as he waited for her to reply. Balancing on her toes, Caroline hesitantly moved in closer to Damon once again. Noses brushing, Damon froze while his arms tightened around Caroline's waist. Fluttering his eyes shut, Damon's heart raced faster and faster at the feeling of Caroline's lips hover over his.
Placing her lips softly against his, Caroline's lips quivered against his because she knew how wrong this was. But just the feeling of his lips on hers made her heart ache… her heart wanted this…
Pulling away from the kiss once again, Caroline's voice cracked as she whispered, "Because I-I can't have myself love you anymore—I can't… I can't love you anymore Damon…"
Damon's heart sank at that. He didn't know why but having the thought of Caroline not loving him anymore sickened him. He knew she was trying to change that about herself… that she was trying so hard in not loving him anymore and it made his heart break. He didn't know why but it did.
"I'm sorry…"
That was the only thing that Damon could come up with at the moment. The only thing that ran through his mind was the fact that he was terribly sorry for everything that he had put her through. Caroline didn't deserve any of this. She didn't deserve to be hurt by such a person like him. The truth was he wasn't good enough for her. She would be completely insane to continue loving him. He didn't deserve her love.
Caroline smiled slightly, "Don't be," she whispered back before once again biting down at her lower lip.
Slowly moving away from Damon, Caroline moved Damon's hands gently off her waist which caused them to fall back at Damon's sides. Taking a step away from Damon, Caroline looked up at his thought provoked form. Cocking her head to the side, Caroline smiled warmly up at the man before. "Now can you please stop worrying about hurting me…? As you can see I will be fine…" Caroline reassured, causing Damon's eyes to look back at her.
Forcing a small smile upon his face, Damon nodded slightly. Confused over the slight upset vibe coming off of the older Salvatore, Caroline nudged him, "Might I add, you, Mr. Salvatore are a pretty amazing kisser?"
Smiling at the attempt at trying to make him feel slightly better, Damon slightly rolled his eyes at the blonde.
"We should go…" Caroline added trailing off, as she pasted Damon's frozen form.
Sighing internally Damon followed after her. He didn't know why he was so upset, but something was definitely bothering him. And the pace of his heart at this exact moment was a proof of that.
He couldn't love Caroline… could he?
And there you go!
This is the point where tables turn and now Damon starts to feel things... feelings he doesn't want to face and feelings he doesn't understand!
Tyler and Klaus will be mentioned in the next chapter and a little bit of Elena too!
Daroline is going to be going through a lot!
Anyway? HOW WAS THIS CHAPTER?
REVIEW?!