Thanks for your reviews. I'll be taking a little break from this story to work on some others, but please do not be alarmed. I am not abandoning anything.

Rated M, I own nothing. If you have time, please review.

OoOoOo

If charging through the Citadel on a near rampage skill could have been classified an art form, then Shepard was fairly certain that she would be among its greatest artists. Krogans aside. It did not bother her that she'd left Garrus and Tali in the dust, their proportionally longer legs never quite keeping up with the infuriated human. Nor did she appear particularly troubled when she jogged through the doors of the nearest elevator, jammed the button overly hard, and watched the doors slam shut in the faces of her two surprised teammates.

She wouldn't exactly say it didn't give her just a smidgen of pleasure either. All in all Shepard really did try not to lie to herself; so it wasn't being unkind so much as honest. Correct? 'Yes', she thought sagely, 'that will work.'

She tapped a foot impatiently out of pent-up nerves and just wanting to get this over with. If she'd just been able to exercise her Spectre status, this whole thing would have taken two hours… three tops. But, alas no, she just had to go hunting through the cracks of the citadel, shooting mercs, and dredging up things she didn't want to focus on.

It wasn't enough to ask her to deal with Reapers, the Council, and oh let's not forget the 'oh so charming' Illusive man. Fucker couldn't even spell 'elusive' right.

Her thoughts rambled and jumbled as she tried to focus herself for the shit-storm that was about to go flying in all directions. Yet, she found herself unable to block out the familiar elevator music and the pang of longing because she missed having Wrex around for a moment like this. The Krogan had the most tongue-in-cheek humor that Shepard simply adored.

That and she believed he would have enjoyed going up to the embassies with her and his favorite shotgun. They were both oddly perverse like that. Granted, Shepard hid it better. Not by much, she allowed gracefully, but enough that she had advanced through the Alliance military without her superiors knowing what idiots she thought they were.

She watched dispassionately as the doors opened, and her face was fixed in a fiercely determined look that caused nearby Asari to mumble uneasily around her. She stalked up the ramp toward the Earth Councilor's office, her boots echoing loudly in the hallway. A few curious glances were thrown her way by Turian C-Sec Officers. She pointedly ignored them.

The door to the office opened and revealed Councilor Anderson at his desk, his blue uniform neatly pressed. Her eyes went form him, and his surprised expression to the figure in the pompous white suit.

Udina. The one that had been behind the location set-ups of the black market gun deals.

"Shepard?" Anderson queried politely. "What are you doing here? I-"

In the time it had taken him to ask the question, Shepard had sprung up on the balls of her feet. She took three quick running steps, leapt up and pulled back her fist. She came down with force, letting the punch fly directly into Udina's face. His nose reacted like a geyser and crimson blood rushed from the injury. She watched in obvious satisfaction and he spun almost like a top and crumpled into a heap at her feet.

Anderson blinked and turned his chair toward Shepard, he had not bothered getting out of his seat.

"Something on your mind Shepard?"

She rubbed her fist absent-mindedly. "Oh, you could say that."

"I only ask because you seem… upset," he continued amicably.

"Upset?"

"Just a bit."

Shepard barked out a startled laugh. "I am a bit, I believe."

The Earth Councilor gestured to his advisor moaning on the floor and looked at her expectantly. "Care to fill me in?"

So she did. She had always respected Anderson. He was a damn fine soldier and he had always looked out for her. Even when others had cast her to the way side and it wasn't in his best interest to do so. For that, she had been forever grateful and would help him in any way she could. She told him about Chellick approaching her, leaving out the steamy bits because Anderson was like a father figure and her private life was no one's business, and about the lives lost combined with the heavy legal implications.

Anderson, to his credit, listed to every word she had to say. With each passing moment, he grew more and more angry.

"Sadly Shepard," he confided in her as Udina began to pick himself up off the floor. "There is little I can do. You found a connection, yes. But, we both know he had much deeper roots than either of us would like and friends in higher places than you can imagine. Hell, the only reason I'm even the councilor instead of him is because of you."

She winced at the honest reply. Movement drew her attention to the floor.

"He has his uses," Anderson continued, "Though I think it is time I put him back in his place. With a much tighter leash."

Udina glowered at them, pinching his nose to stem the blood flow.

'Douchebag,' Shepard thought angrily.

She didn't stop Udina as he ran form the room shouting obscenities and threats in her direction with Anderson trailing in his wake. It was not lost upon Shepard that Anderson's chest was puffed out in manner of Paternal pride. She smiled to herself.

It truly had been a solid punch.

The door opened again and Shepard couldn't stop her eyebrow from rising in surprise. She had only credited Udina with empty threats. The fact he might have actually returned with someone he thought could take on Shepard was both highly entertaining and dumbfounding.

Her surprise turned to annoyance when tell-tale blue armor came into view, accompanied by one very pissed looking turian.

'Ah, Garrus has found me,' she thought.

"Shepard," he stated lowly.

"Wrex," she quipped with a snarky smile.

"Ha ha. Very funny."

"I try," she replied mildly as she shrugged her shoulders. "How do you keep finding me."

The turian cleared his throat awkwardly, and looked down. "Turians have a… good sense of smell."

She blushed to the roots of her hair. She had forgotten she was 'scented' for a few moments of blissful time. Well, that had been enjoyable while it lasted.

"Was that Udina I saw running out of here with a bloody nose?" His mandibles quivered for a moment in honest curiosity and pulling her from her train of thought.

Shepard took the lull in their emotional storm and chose to answer him. "Yes, yes it was."

His avian eyes took in the room, the blood pooled slightly on the floor and Shepard's appearance with an all too keen eye.

"Did you need something?" She cocked her head to the side and felt much more at ease with some of her pent up emotions released physically. "Where's Tali?" She looked past him toward the door, not allowing him to answer.

Garrus blinked startled. He craned his neck in a true avian fashion toward the door. Shepard thought that odd. It was as if he had just noticed Tali were not with him.

"Uh," he started in a confounded manner, "she was right behind me… I thought."

Shepard found that both funny and strange, but decided not to comment on it for it would serve no purpose here.

"So yeah," she continued on conversationally, "Udina was linked with the black market arms deal. It turns out that he was taking a cut of the profits for turning a blind eye in the human sections. I think he plans on trying to over throw Anderson, but that's not going to happen if I have anything to say about it. I didn't leave him in charge for this exact reason. You know Donnel. Anything that gives the humans and himself a leg up, damn anyone else," she all but spat out the last part in firm distaste.

His face registered his disbelief and she almost snorted at him. He might not have seen Udina for the worm he was, but Shepard had sent many years trusting her life in the hands of herself and others. If her instincts said he wasn't worth the piss if he were on fire, chances were that he wasn't.

"Well, that certainly keeps things interesting," Garrus remarked off-handedly.

"Tell me about it."

The turian shifted uncomfortably. "I don't like this," he stated clearly.

She nodded her agreement. "I'm not a fan of it either. Udina needed to be knocked down a peg or eight. Unfortunately he won't get punished nearly enough to suit me-"

"That's not what I meant, but that too," he interrupted in a tight voice.

She blinked. "Oh, what did you mean?"

"I don't like this rift between us. It's not…right," he fumbled awkwardly for the word.

In some respects, she understood he was correct. They couldn't be at odds and out saving the galaxy. She needed Garrus at her back to protect her six when situations got rough. She also needed him as a friend and sounding board on tactics or missions as things presented themselves. However, she had been pulled in all different directions at once and frankly; she was running out of energy to deal with all the side missions that came along with trying to destroy the Collectors. Hell, she didn't even want to think about what would be required to get the Reapers. They were still an ever-present threat and never far from her thoughts.

Yet, she was not willing to be stepped all over and have her affections smashed repeatedly to make everyone else happy. She wasn't that much of a martyr.

Garrus walked toward her slowly, and cautiously, as if she would leave again if he came to close. The action caused her heart to throb painfully in her chest. There was intent in his eyes that she couldn't quite read, their species barrier being what it was. He reminded her for a moment of Septimus, but he looked so very unsure.

"There is something I have been meaning to talk to you about," he jerked his head once in a nod, as if even bringing the words up caused him some nervousness.

Shepard braced herself for anything under the sun to come out of his mouth.

"You asked me once, well… more than once, what was going on with me." His jaw clacked as he clenched it shut and alien eyes zeroed in on her. "I think I finally have an answer for you. And, I know now isn't the perfect time, but the way things are going between us I might not get a second chance."

She hadn't been expecting that.

"Shepard," he warbled with his double-harmonic voice edged in pain. It caught her attention and though she did not want to, she turned to face him. Patiently, she placed her hands behind her back and waited. Garrus drew a shaky breath and rubbed the back of his neck for a moment in agitation. "You don't understand what it's like."

She blinked at him before sighing. "Yes, you've said that before," she muttered acerbically.

"No," he corrected harshly, "No. It's not… it's just… you."

"Me?" She stood straighter in indignation. "What's so awful about me? You didn't seem to mind so much when I was pulling your ass out of the fire-"

Garrus clenched his taloned hands in frustration. "That's not what I meant. Spirits I am getting this all wrong!" He walked toward the nearest balcony, and Shepard watched him in confusion laced with hurt.

She gingerly took a few steps closer toward him, one hand reflexively reached for his arm before she could think better of it. Garrus didn't turn, but looked down at where her hand was touching him.

"You were dead Shepard. Dead. I know it seems like a stupid thing to ask, but do you get that? You were there, and vibrant. So very… everything that I respected. There is no one in this galaxy I respect more than you. Everything I…" He turned his face away even further, causing him to shift slightly to the left. "Valued," he stated after a moment's pause. "You were my commander. My friend. Someone I… we've been through a lot. Even two years ago. When I heard that you died, it hurt. It nearly destroyed me."

Shepard noticed his talons bit into the railing of the balcony with a great deal of force as he clenched his hands tighter.

"It hurt so much that I had failed."

"Failed," her voice was soft but firm in recitation.

His eyes closed briefly and his mandibles pulled tight in remembered grief. "I had failed to protect you. If I had been there, maybe you wouldn't have died. Maybe I could have gotten Joker off the ship sooner and we all could have huddled together in the damn escape pod. I would've… you have always helped me Shepard. I'm not foolish enough to think otherwise. First with taking me to bring down Saren, saving me from certain death countless times including those mercs on Omega, and now with Sidonis," he bit out the name as if it still offended him greatly.

"Garrus," Shepard said softly. It made her heart heavy just to watch him be so vulnerable. In a moment like this the great Commander did not know what to say. And, the woman wasn't much better off. "I-"

"You've always been there," he continued on seemingly lost in his thoughts. "Always. But, when you died; suddenly you weren't there. You were just gone. I kept going forward, like you always did and ended up costing so many people their lives. Then just a suddenly, you were back. You were charging up the bridge on Omega in my scope and I couldn't trust my eyes. I thought all those hours fighting for my life had finally caused me to crack. But it was you, holding out your arms and so happy to see me. I-"

When he had begun to tremble, Shepard leaned her head against his shoulder in an unspoken gesture of comfort.

"Spirits! Even now you're trying to comfort me and I'm…"

"With Tali," she finished softly, and it pained her to say the words. They tasted leaden and cold on her tongue. They were both foreign and not.

He snapped his gaze to look at her, the shock of her words translating through his face plates and widened mandibles. His normally sharp gaze seemed to mellow out to a soft look of something she couldn't quite place in a turian. Concern? Sadness? Understanding?

"Shepard," he warbled softly as if she were something infinitely precious, "there is something I need to tell you-"

"Commander Shepard," Chellick's voice cut across the tender moment like a dull serrated knife. "By order of C-SEC, you are under arrest for battery and assault against advisor Donnel Udina."

"Ambassador," Udina hissed angrily.

Shepard spared the man a raised brow in mocking question. Her eyes turned toward Anderson who was doing his best to hide his smile as he stood behind the C-SEC officer trailed by Udina.

"I don't think that will be necessary Detective Chellick," Anderson said dryly, "Commander Shepard was acting on my orders."

Shepard gloated slightly.

Udina gaped in outrage. "How dare you!" His vehement gaze landed on Shepard. "You'll pay for this! Do you hear me? You'll pay!"

"What are you going to do? Kill me?" Her manner was relaxed and a touch sarcastic.

"I believe it is time for advisor Udina to make himself useful," Anderson cut in forcefully. "Get out of my sight. I'm sure you can find some paperwork around here that needs doing. We will be having a talk, you and I, in a moment."

Chellick observed the pair, and Shepard knew that this might cause him discomfort to see her with Garrus in this manner. However, she couldn't really dredge up the effort to look guilty or chastised. Truth be told, she wasn't with anyone. So there wasn't a single reason for her not to be by Vakarian's side.

The detective flared his mandibles to show his impressively sharp teeth, and a low rumbling emanated from his chest. Shepard could only surmise that he was upset. His avian eyes locked with Garrus'.

Shepard swallowed the hot lump in her throat. Her head tilted down a fraction and she took a slow deep breath. She'd cleared everything up for Chellick, but she doubted it would go anywhere. Udina was a slippery little bastard with far too many connections to actually implicate him outright. Though Anderson was a fair man, he didn't have the luxury of incarcerating Udina right now. Shepard knew this would simply all disappear into the woodwork.

Fucking hell.

She could already guess the number of files that were encountering an 'unrecoverable error' right about now.

"Oh by the way, before I forget, Ms. Vas Neema is looking for you," Chellick stated coolly before giving a self-satisfied grin. "You wouldn't want to keep her waiting."

Shepard reacted as if someone had struck her. She pulled away from Garrus, and shot Chellick a look that would have castrated a lesser turian. Yet, she refused to show weakness for long. She nodded cordially at his words and walked passed him in an effort to save some face in front of these males.

Garrus' words echoed in her ears long after she had stepped into the elevator to return to the Normandy.

"No, I wouldn't want to do that, now would I?" His words had been soft, confused, and full of self-loathing just the same as when he had confided in her about his team.

Shepard blinked back the moisture in her eyes, blaming it on the different climate in the Citadel. She had done one task, now it was down to finding Sidonis and giving Garrus his peace of mind. Then she was going to fling everything she had at the Collectors.

She was the first human Spectre, what did she have if not someone threat to fight?

The answer in her head was astoundingly hollow.