Reckoner (S5E3)

When all is said and done, the weather and love are the two elements about which one can never be sure - Alice Hoffman.

Pip had dragooned Hotch into letting her have her laptop so that she could do some work from home. Bored, and increasingly twitchy about the trial and the day she would give her testimony as it got closer and closer, she'd gambled on Hotch's new-found obsession to do more, to work harder. She'd won.

That was how on the morning of the day she was due to take her oath and tell the jury what she'd seen, Pip phoned Rossi to give him a dose of bad news.

"Heads up, I don't have long," she said, dispensing with the polite formalities as usual.

Rossi checked his watch. "Aren't you supposed to be at the courthouse in less than an hour?"

Pip made a dismissive noise. "This is more important. You've just caught a case."

"And you call me, from home, when you're supposed to already be on your way to court, to tell me this?" he asked, exasperated. "I could have waited and found out in the usual way."

"It's in Commack, Long Island."

"Oh." Rossi felt his stomach drop.

"Thought you ought to know." Pip's voice was anguished. "Dave, I'm sorry. I've got to go, even with my escort I might be late to court, but I thought you'd want to hear it from me first, rather than just have it sprung on you."

"No, no it's fine. I understand," he reassured her. "Thanks for the warning."

"Dave?" There was a pause. "If you decide to go? I'll be waiting when you get back."

She was gone before he managed to ask how she'd known he was thinking of asking Hotch if he could stay behind.

Unfortunately, with Reid lying about being fit to fly, Rossi had no choice but to join the rest of the team as they flew out to Commack. A place he'd sworn never to set foot in again.

And the only person who knew why was in court. Unreachable. Unavailable.

It was just as bad as he could have imagined it. His old friend Ray was dead and his tragic history with Emma had not only been dragged out into the open, but used as a tool to try and get Judge Schuller to talk. He lied about sleeping with Emma, but he'd caught the lack of surprise on Morgan's face and knew the younger man had believed it, even if only for a moment. Rossi made sure to tell Hotch it had been a fabrication as they flew home. He'd been lost in his own world just staring at Emma's picture, when Hotch had piped up and asked about her. Recognising an opportunity to gently steer his friend down a less destructive path, Rossi tried to help him see that he still had something to fight for. Using Emma as an example of love lost because he didn't make time for it, felt disrespectful but necessary.

"What are you going to do, to make sure you're not a lonely guy wondering why you let the purest thing in your life get away?" The words he'd said to Hotch echoed in Rossi's mind as he drove to Pip's place with a front seat full of Chinese takeout. And another pizza for the two Marshals sat outside in their car.

What to do indeed. He'd done nothing but think about Pip the entire time he'd been away.

He'd seen the look Hotch had given him. A contorted mixture of thoughtful and disbelief, tempered with annoyance. The disbelief and annoyance had been for Rossi's own hypocrisy, something that wasn't fully appreciated until he was letting himself into Pip's apartment with dinner in his arms. How wonderfully domestic of him.

Was he really going to go through the rest of his life hoping and wishing for something, or was he going to do something about it? The look Hotch had given him flashed through his mind once more. Rossi decided in that moment, with his key still in the door, that he wasn't going to wait any longer. He'd tell Pip how he felt, and deal with whatever the consequences were.

New found resolve lasted until Pip asked him outright what was on his mind once they'd eaten. Dinner had been perfect, a lively argument over man's impact or otherwise on climate change and the problems inherent with trying to solve that while still being a nation that thrived on large-engined trucks and cars. They meandered around a little, at one point disagreeing over the interference of bright street lights on sleeping patterns. It was a topic so completely unrelated to work or anything else that Rossi could completely immerse himself in the discussion, sometimes even playing devil's advocate just to get Pip's back up. She'd flare up, passion sparkling in her glorious hazel eyes, and dress him down so thoroughly he could only laugh.

As before, dessert brought that enjoyable pastime to an end, and then Pip broadsided him.

"Dave? Do you want to talk about it?" That she didn't just tell him to do so spoke of her knowledge of how conflicted he was. She'd seen through him, as always. His energetic defence of the V8 engine hadn't convinced her that he was fine. Probably because he wasn't.

Rossi shook his head in the negative. He'd changed his mind some point in the few seconds between the last bites of cannoli and her speaking.

"Ok," she said, laying a warm hand on his arm. "That's fine too. I can't imagine what it would be like to have to back to Chicago, so I get it. Just remember I'm here if you need me." Pip got to her feet and started clearing up the remains of their takeout and the inevitable heap of cartons and packaging that entailed.

Rossi lounged in her sofa sipping his first whisky of the evening as she disappeared into the kitchen with the trash. He was a little put out. She'd completely missed the direction of his thoughts, probably for the first time since they'd met. It wasn't Emma and Commack he was thinking of, but of her, of Pip and the strange relationship they had.

He was both glad and disappointed she hadn't picked up what he was thinking. Self-doubt wasn't a common occurrence for him, and all the more unpleasant because of that. He wasn't used to questioning his own actions or motivations in this manner, but he had to ask himself honestly: was he just setting himself up to get his heart broken again? Would she ever think about him the same way he did her, or would he be better off just keeping his mouth shut?

"Started without me?" teased Pip lightly as she returned. She poured herself a drink and looked him over again. "Are you sure you're ok?" she asked seriously. "You can tell me anything, you know that."

Except he couldn't. Suddenly that felt like lying to her, and Rossi needed to leave. Immediately. Before he made a complete fool of himself.

"I know," he said gently, with a smile that he hoped didn't look as artificial and wonky as it felt. "Thanks, but actually I ought to be going," he added, hoping none of his thoughts showed on his face.

The twisted frown he received in response told him that he'd been less than successful. Rossi made a mental note never to play poker with Pip lest he lose his shirt and a lot more besides.

"Going back…was…" He sighed. "I'm worn out," said Rossi honestly, hoping to reinforce his need to leave, this time with a little more truth mixed in. Hopefully enough that she wouldn't spot the effort to be deliberately misleading. "I just want my own pillow and to see my dog."

"Need to keep up your energy, we're going out tomorrow," replied Pip, making an effort to tease him whilst still giving him pointed assessing look.

With a sinking feeling that Rossi felt all the way down to his toes, he realised she wasn't buying a single bit of what he'd just said and had retuned that receiver he was convinced she had in her head. The one that allowed her to know what he was thinking, even when he wasn't sure. She'd picked up wavelength Rossi and realised it definitely wasn't Commack that was on his mind. She just wasn't quite sure what was.

"Out?" he asked uncertainly. "I thought you weren't keen on that while you've got bodyguards escorting you everywhere you go."

"JP thinks we'll get a guilty verdict sometime tomorrow afternoon," Pip said with a somewhat relieved smile. "It's all gone far quicker than expected, the jury retired to consider this afternoon. Hopefully by tomorrow, I can finally stop being followed by Pinky and Perky. So, you and me?" she pointed her finger at them both in turn, "we're going out to celebrate my new freedom." There was a familiar hint of steel in her voice, a promise that he wouldn't get away with avoiding talking to her for long. "You still owe me dinner out."

Rossi smiled, a far more genuine one than he'd managed a few minutes previously. Whatever his thoughts about talking to her, really talking to her, about what she meant to him and what that meant for their friendship…it would wait until the following evening. When he could sit across from her in their restaurant, where it had all begun.

"I'll drink to that," he said as drained his glass. He stood to go and told himself the flash of disappointment on her face was wishful thinking on his part. "Can I pick you up at the courthouse?" he asked.

Pip shook her head. "His mother Audrey is a real piece of work, she makes him look comparatively sane – my dear boy wouldn't hurt a fly, it was all the evil ex-girlfriend, you know the type. I'd rather not have you in her sights if you don't mind." She snorted. "I've got half an idea that shooting us was her idea not his." The sardonic smile that went with that statement told Rossi she wasn't really joking.

"Seeing as I'll be footloose and fancy free, I'll drive and pick you up from the Bureau, cases permitting. It's about time you see what I bought myself as a present." Pip grinned, as if the anticipation of his reaction amused her.

Rossi nodded. "Is your driving just as crazy as the rest of you?" he teased, making his way to the door. He didn't know what she'd bought, only that she'd replaced the clapped out old estate car she'd driven back from Maryland. He'd never been a passenger with Pip driving, and knowing her as he did, he could only imagine what an experience that would be.

Pip laughed. "Honey, you have no idea," she drawled, prompting Rossi to laugh with her. "Be grateful I sold my bike years ago, or you'd be turning up to the restaurant on the back of a Harley Davidson softail," she added.

Rossi raised his eyes to the ceiling. "Grazie," he muttered to The Man Upstairs. He'd never been a fan of motorbikes.

Pip sniggered again. Rossi was pleased to see her so carefree and happy, especially as he'd caused that chirpy grin on her face. He lent down to brush a gentle kiss to her cheek, but Pip moved at the last moment and it ended up being dangerously close to her lips.

"Goodnight Pip," Rossi whispered, mind now firmly back to thinking about the conversation they'd have tomorrow.

"Goodnight Dave."

Rossi drove home with the heavy knowledge that tomorrow, everything would change. For good or for ill.