Chapter 18
To his surprise, it was Pleakley who took over the introductions instead of Bubbles, who just closed the door to the office and stood guard over it.
A natural door guarder. Can see why he's friends with Superball, Max mused as he put his attention back on Pleakley.
"You see Max, we came to earth, myself and a Doctor Jumba, to chase down Stitch, an experiment Doctor Jumba made that… well got him arrested. Stitch had escaped the authorities and with my knowledge of Earth and Jumba's knowledge of Stitch, or experiment 626 as we called him, we were sent after him"
Pleakley, Max noticed, seemed irritatingly polite. He was generally happy and hadn't responded at all to Max's previous rudeness and man handling. Max instantly felt himself wanting to see how far he could push Pleakley's buttons before he would snap, but decided against it.
"Well, I won't go into details but Stitch was cleared by the Galactic President herself after a rather harrowing set of adventures"
Harrowing? Adventures… must… repress urge… to troll.
"And we all ended up living with a truly wonderful family in Hawaii. Lilo is a truly one of a kind child and Nani, Lilo's older sister is just sooo accommodating to us all, I…" Pleakley slowly dropped the topic as he noticed the look in Max's eye.
"Anyway" Pleakley said with a weak laugh "We've been living on the island for a two years now… met some other experiments. I won't go into that either, too long a story. But one day, a week ago Jumba suddenly disappeared"
"Disappeared?" Max said, who had been wondering when his new client would get to the point.
"Yes, just gone and off. No message. Nothing. We didn't know what to do but then Stitch left as well. He told us he was going after Jumba. Said he could track him or something. But he went just as suddenly. We followed the tracking device in his ship and it shows he landed here, in New York"
It was then, when this was sinking in that Agent Bubbles spoke up. "The situation with Stitch is a sensitive one. He is not just an alien but technically a dangerous experiment. One originally designed to take out entire cities."
Bubbles spotted a look made by Pleakley and added, if only for his benefit. "I do not personally believe Stitch capable of such acts since he came to Earth and met the Hawaiians Lilo and Nani. But his current standing on the Intergalactic Court is a tenuous one. And that is only Stitch. Dr Jumba is technically considered even more dangerous."
"Go on" Max said, wondering if he should mention he had already met their Stitch and the encounter had not been a friendly one.
"He has the knowledge to create more creatures like Stitch. The knowledge on how to create such living weapons of mass destruction is considering far more dangerous then what one of his creations can do. His position with the Galactic Council is even more tenuous. He is technically carrying out his prison sentence here on Earth."
Bubbles then, showing the only emotion Max had seen out of him so far, looked over at Pleakley and glared over at him. An impressive feat considering he was wearing shades. "So, when Jumba went missing, Pleakley decided the first thing to do was report it to the Grand Councilwoman herself"
The glare dropping and looking back at Max. "Superball told me you have experience with…. Exceptional cases such as this. Do you believe you could help us?"
Max looked between the Agent and the cyclops in front of him, not answering straight away. He then looked at the mass of sticky notes on the main desk. The notes for the current case he was on…
Sighing, Max got out of Sam's old chair and went over to his original desk. The school unit that now stood discarded in the corner of the office. With a horrible grating sound Max dragged over the desk next to the larger one.
"Ok…" Max said, going back to the main desk and fishing out a pen and set of post stick notes. "… Give me all the details on this Jumba guy"
2 Hours later
"And then what happened" Max said, ripping off another sticky note.
"Well the Grand Councilwoman had just arrived on Earth to arrest Stitch, me and Jumba when… (sniff). I am sorry to pause but the smoke in there air. Is that what you Earth people call incense?"
"No" Agent Bubbles said simply, waving his hand in the air to clear the smoke around him. "We call it second hand tobacco smoke. Max, sir. Could you please put that out?"
"Fascinating" drawled Pleakley as he studied the cigarette in Max's hand.
Max sighed, flicking the embers off his cigarette idly. Generally he never used to smoke all that much. Only on the odd occasion, like when he was at the Inventory and he thought proper poker playing should only be done with a fine cloud of thick cigar smoke settled around the players. But after Sam's death he had been going through packs day after day. He had cut back but not completely.
Max noted the annoyed look on Bubbles face as he stared over at Pleakley who was happily sniffing up the smoke trails in front of him like he was smelling a freshly picked daisy. Deciding he could be irritating once he had the full story he acquiesced and crushed the cigarette in his hand and flicked the remains into the bin.
"Ok, go on" Bubbles said, indicating Pleakley could finish.
"Right. And that's when The Grand Councilwoman decided Stitch, me and Jumba could stay on the island, with Lilo and Nani" Pleakley said, ending the story with a forlorn look, as is reminiscing at a happy memory.
And they all lived happily ever after… Max thought to himself sarcastically as he wrote the last detail down on a yellow sticky note and slapped it on a free space on the small desk. He had run out of room on his tiny school desk and chair far faster than on Sam's old desk.
As ideas go, this is a pretty stupid method of keeping notes, Max thought as he looked down at his desk and chair, both appearing as if they had suddenly evolved and produced a set of yellow vibrant scales. It looked ridiculous.
Problem for another day. "OK. And beyond that, you've lived on the island together? No real problems since then?"
It was Agent Bubbles who took over. "There are only two known people, also aliens, who have caused… some mischief with experiment 626 and his adopted family. A former captain of the guard for the Galactic Council and a former colleague of Dr Jumba. Both were prime suspects but through our own investigations, both have been captured and eliminated-"
Max perked up. "Really?" He said gleefully before laying on his thickest presidential speaking voice and adding "That'll send a clear message to those illegal extra-terrestrial immigrants"
"…eliminated as suspects" Bubbles finished, again showing that small but noticeable tone of irritation in his voice.
"Oh. More boring. But OK." Max said, looking back down to the desk at the various notes he had made. Though, like the bigger, equally sticky-note infested desk, the details were randomly placed, Max quickly ran through the events as Pleakley had described them, from Dr Jumba creating this monster thing called Experiment 626 (later named Stitch). From there Max had asked about the Grand Councilwoman, her capture and trial of Jumba, followed by his incarceration.
The whole Stitch escaping, getting to Earth and forming a loving bond with a sweet cynical Hawaiian girl really didn't interest Max. Not relating to the facts of the case, but emotional. Pleakley had been telling the whole story like some wonderful adventure, where a poor little experiment went on a journey of discovery, finding out he didn't need to go around breaking stuff…
… and as it happens, Max's first encounter with the little guy was to have his car thrown on top of him. As first impressions went, Max couldn't think of any worse.
A memory of his first encounter speaking with Cocky suddenly appeared to before him sharp focus, as if to answer his own rhetorical question. Feeling his mood darken, Max focused back on the case to distract him.
"Ok, I think I have everything I need to know… this guy really doesn't sound like he should be that hard to find, based on the picture you gave me" Max said, staring at the family picture he held of Stitch, Jumba, Pleakley and even a smiling Agent Bubbles. All of them were circled around, as Max had been told, Lilo and Nani.
Max focused on the four eyed whale of an alien at the back of the picture. He towered over everyone else and… well his features wouldn't get lost in a crowd, even in New York.
"Ok. I'll take the case. Find this guy, who's somewhere in the city. Sounds easy. Sounds simple" Max said, showing a perfectly innocent pearl white grin
Wait for it… wait for it….
"…There is one proble-" Bubbles said uncomfortably
"KNEW IT!" Max said happily, jumping up and pointing repeatedly at Bubbles. "I knew there would be something else. Don't tell me, a door that needs 3 keys that are held by three-"
"There's a deadline" Bubbles said simply.
Max paused and shrugged. "…My second guess. So why the time limit… which you also haven't told me"
Bubbles, to Max's surprise, suddenly glared over to Pleakley, who gave an embarrassed chuckle.
"Well you see" He began, already using the universal tone that said, 'though I might have screwed up, it was by no real fault of my own, and if you are a reasonable person you will of course see that as well'. "When Jumba disappeared and Agent Bubbles got involved, we spent a good long while looking through the island, trying to track him down… and-"
"After I asked you specifically not to do so" Bubbles cut in.
"… After Mr Bubbles did indeed say not to do so" Pleakley added, as if that point was hardly an important detail. "I still thought it would be a good idea to, at the very least, inform the Council Woman of the problem"
"The problem of Jumba disappearing off the island. With no sign of struggle. A planet he has been put under house arrest. The Council Woman has taken the view that Doctor Jumba has left to try and either continue his work or leave the planet. Neither of which are things she is happy with"
"Don't you guys have a space ship at hand?" Max ask, adding a couple extra post stick notes for 'No sign of struggle' and 'Clock is ticking'.
"One that can leave the atmosphere, which is what Stitch took." Pleakley added helpfully. "It cannot make interstellar trips. And the nearest inhabited planet is over-"
Pleakley paused as a low pitched whine suddenly erupted from his coat pocket. Pleakley suddenly went pale, which was impressive considering his natural complexion, as he took out a small device with a single blinking red button.
There was a stillness in the room as Max looked curiously at the flashing orb whilst Pleakley and Agent Bubbles shared a worried look.
"What was that Earth expression you mentioned before Mr Bubbles?" Pleakley said, looking back at the device in his hands, as if he held a freshly armed bomb.
"Speak of the Devil?" Agent Bubbles suggested.
"Yes, that one." He replied quietly as he timidly pushed the button.
In an instant the object in Pleakley's hand began to glow a dull pulsing blue light as it hovered off his hand and towards the centre of the room, between Max, Bubbles and the now trembling Pleakley.
The tiny orb suddenly began to spin wildly in place as tiny particles of light began to pour from it. The pulses quickened in pace, as did the low whine became a thunderous booming.
"Are skype calls from space always this epic!?" Max shouted over the sound of the drumming, trying to shield his eyes and ears from the sudden disco that had spawned in his office.
As the lights and sounded faded in an instant, all looked at the centre of the room, where now was standing a tall elegant looking alien. The Councilwoman stood there in what was obviously her robes of office, which included a black and gold waist coat, a red cape and, as Max considered it, the most ludicrous looking shoulder pads he had ever seen. It was like a set of deer antlers curving around from her back and circling her face.
Despite the last part of her attire looking a little comical, she still dominated the room with an imperial glare. Max was already jealous. He had tried after being elected president to get a good glare like that going.
"Agent Wendy Pleakley" The Council Women said calmly.
"Wendy?" Max said, sniggering to Agent Bubbles.
"Yes Your Highness?" Pleakley replied in a shaky voice.
"How goes the search on Doctor Jumba. I hope you have news on the matter?"
"Oh, um, YES! Yes Your Highness, we have news" Pleakley said desperately, arms and limbs flailing as he ran over to Max. Placing one hand on Max's should Pleakley continued "We have confirmed Jumba's location is somewhere here in this city and with the help of Agent Bubbles, we have purchased the services of an expert investigator"
"You haven't paid me" Max said simply, slapping away Pleakley's hand as he walked forward toward the Council Women, giving her his best winning smile
The Councilwoman, on her part, looked down and recoiled at Max, saying in startled voice "Another experiment?! He's horrific! Is this what Jumba has been working?"
Max's smile didn't so much fall, but transform from the welcoming grin he used to try and give the impression that he didn't have extremely violent tendencies, to the smile he used before he was about to be extremely violent. It didn't make the expression of revulsion on the Council Women's face any better though.
"I would have you know, madam, I am a Lagomorph" Max said, trying to sound just as airy as she had earlier.
"Oh, I see. Very well then" The Councilwoman said, unapologetic at her earlier comment. "And you have been hired to retrieve the good doctor"
"Yeerrp" Max drawled, too tired to come up with a proper patronising retort.
"Good. Then the first thing we need to confirm is if Jumba has left the planet" The Council Women said promptly.
"He couldn't have done. He left the only ship behind and this is a Class B planet. Vehicles that can travel even outside this planets solar system haven't been created yet." Pleakley shot back quickly, desperate to put the Council Woman at ease.
"And it is not possible he could have constructed such a vehicle since disappearing?" The Council Woman replied coolly. "He is capable of such a feat I believe."
"Hmm, he would need the right materials to make the parts. Making one from scratch with what we have available here on Earth… and if he wanted to do that, he would have taken the other ship, even if only for parts" Pleakley said, sounding less sure under the Council Woman's heavy gaze.
"…But it is a possibility" The comment was dripping with threat. Obviously if Jumba had left Earth with no given reason and considering what he knew, the ramifications could be immense.
That was what Max should have gathered from the discussion, but his mind kept tuning out all the political problems suddenly on his door step and thinking about his earlier session with Philip. He wanted to get the next session over and done with as quickly as possible.
"Beyond this investigator we must discuss this with your worlds leader, to inform her or him of the very real need to find Doctor Jumba and quickly" The Council Woman said, pacing away from the now relieved looking Pleakley and instead aimed the comment at Agent Bubbles.
He at least seemed to be able to handle himself better as he replied smoothly "There is no planetary leader of Earth. It is made up of smaller lands and areas within those lands that have their own rulers"
"Fine" The Councilwoman replied, disdainfully. "If there is no central leader then we at least need to contact the leader of the area you are all currently residing in"
There was an awkward pause from Agent Bubbles. He seemed intent on not looking directly at the now grinning Max.
"Oh, I think my adorably long ears are burning" Max said, looking as if he was trying to hide a blush.
The Councilwoman turned to Max in confusion. "I beg your pardon?"
With what seemed like great reluctance Agent Bubbles said in a resigned voice "Max, the one we requested to investigate Jumba's disappearance… is also the freely elected leader of the United States… in which we currently reside"
Max grinned ear to ear as he stood up straight and performed a casual Nixon Victory Salute, as if this illustrated the point.
"…(sigh) Very well. Max, was it? What news do you have on Jumba's location. Do you believe he has left the planet" The Council Woman said, sounding slightly less patronising then she had earlier.
Max was about to say, No, I'm only just got the case and I have no clue about any of this rubbish, when he saw Agent Bubbles desperately make a sign at him in his peripheral vision.
What is he… Max thought idly, until he suddenly recognised the hand gesture as one Superball had taught it. A sign every president had been taught for the last two centuries by their respective secret service team.
"Oh" Max then cleared his throat and said clearly. "We have been informed of the disappearance of Jumba and can confirm no reports of him leaving the planet"
All of which was true. Max had been informed of the disappearance, if only one hour ago, and he had been given no reports of Jumba leaving the planet. Because, as mentioned earlier, Max received no information from government officials at any given time. Plausible Deniability. Something that Superball had drilled into him that, as president, there was a lot more stuff Max wouldn't want to know rather than know, so he could in fact say whatever he liked in public.
This hadn't really meant anything to Max who was still treating his raise to power like a roller coaster. That is, guessing it would be an exciting but short ride filled with lots of people screaming.
But the sign was something Superball had taught him when giving speeches which meant deny everything.
"That is something at least" The Councilwoman said, taking the clear answer to mean Max had been honest.
"But we still need to make a plans until the real officers arrive to track Jumba down. They should be ready to leave soon but anything you can find out beforehand would most likely be of use"
Why is it my luck to meet all the crappy Aliens… Max thought, seething.
"You will need to compile a list of possible locations and start a sweep of the city-" The Councilwoman began before a sound burst into the room.
Ring Ring
Oh thank god, Max thought.
"What is that sound?" The Council Women asked, obviously annoyed to be interrupted.
"Phone. Be right with you" Max said, grinning apologetically as he walked away from the suddenly annoyed Council Women and over to the phone. He noticed as he turned Pleakley desperately shaking his head at Max, as it trying to say ignoring the Council Women was not a good idea.
Already aware of that and going ahead for that exact reason, Max picked up the phone and leaned against the stand, facing the rest of the group in his office with a relaxed attitude.
"Hey there. Who's calling?" Max said conversationally.
"Hello Max" Came the voice of The Geek. "I've just got the results of the tests you asked for"
"Fantastic" Max said, trying desperately to remember what he had asked for. He didn't think well when sleep deprived.
"Is now a good time?" Darla asked
Max, knowing he might be pushing the matter turned from Pleakley, Agent Bubbles and the now impatient looking Council Woman as he repeated her question "Is now a good time…" to the whole room.
He saw Bubbles mine the words no and Pleakley again kept shaking his head.
"Yeah, now's as good a time as any" Max replied cheerily, leaning back and soaking in the rage in the room. He knew deep down he was being childish, even more so then usual. But he was tired and after his earlier session with Philip, on edge.
"Ok well…. I'll be honest Max, we've had our best guys over here, and that includes me, run every known test imaginable on the sample you gave me. And the good news is we can see some of the chemical components of the nail."
"Some?" Max asked.
"That's also the bad news. It's weird Max" Darla said, actually sounding frustrated "Part of the DNA sequence and chemical composition come back clear as day. But other parts… it's like there's a wall around it. Every time we scan it and read it, segments of the data come back as gibberish. Like its encrypted… DNA that cannot be read. That's…."
"Alien" Max added helpfully
"Yeah, I suppose. It's just annoying. Most of the later tests we did were destructive so there isn't much left of the sample. It's annoying watching each test come back with negative results and know you have a finite number of tries left. I thought I would enjoy being back in the lab but I'm starting to miss management"
"So, find out anything useful from what did make sense?"
"One thing for certain. As I said, part of the genetic sequence is coming back correctly, and the chemical analysis did find a number of compounds that seemed to make up this thing. One, part of this guy's genetic makeup contains a certain synthetic substance you might recognise. Dryhazometosin"
"What now?" Max asked before clicking "Oh. Wait, the stuff from the warehouse that was stolen?"
"Yep. Made the comparison and it came up green. This thing is made from the stuff. Or something else that Dryhazometosin is an component of."
"Ok. Good to know, I guess" Max mused, taking out his sticky pad and making a note. Suddenly remembering Max quickly added "Did you get the other samples I sent you?"
"Other samples? What other samples?" Darla said, sounding halfway between eager and fatigued at the news.
"I just handed it to reception. One thing I got from another encounter yesterday and another from the warehouse. Could you have a look?"
"Sure. Already here and got everyone working on this." Darla said. Through the phone Max could make out the muffled command from Darla to some random lackey nearby the collect the delivery. "Ok Max. I'll have a look and come back to you with what we find."
"You're the best Geek" Max said affectionately.
"I certainly am" Darla said happily before putting the phone down.
Max heard the other end of the line go dead. He was just about to put the phone down when he spotted the impatient looks from all those in the room with him, including the apparent ruler of the Galaxy.
It was for this reason that Max decided to instead ask into the dead phone "… So… What're you wearing?"
"Mr Max" The Councilwoman yelled, stepping forward to Max and looming over him threateningly. "You will cease your conversation now and focus on the task at hand. Right now!"
Max, feeling he had pushed things a bit and for no actual reason let up. He threw the phone down casually and picked up his pad.
"As you wish, Mam" Max said, this time trying not to sound cheeky. It obviously hadn't worked judging from her expression.
"You will report you findings in five hours' time. My our investigation team are being prepped and will make their way to Earth as soon as possible. We must find Jumba and confirm if he has been kidnapped or if he is working by himself"
The comment didn't make any suggestion as to which was the worst case. And with that, and obvious tired of handling Max, the Councilwoman disappeared into a cloud of particles, leaving the spinning orb floating in the air.
"Did you really have to annoy her Max. She holds, from the perspective of the Intergalactic matters, absolute control over Earth."
"She owns Earth?" Max said, appalled that someone else could say they owned the world, other than him. (Max generally couldn't distinguish between being president and owning America and also couldn't distinguish between America and the rest of Earth"
"No, we are a class B Under Developed Planet, which is technically part of the Galactic Federation, which the Council Woman heads. We are protected by them. So for that reason it might not be a good idea to annoy someone we have had good relations with for some time"
"Eh, heard that before" Max said, remember his times meeting various diplomats when he took his role of President seriously... well, more seriously than he did now.
"Anyway, back to Jumba" Max said quickly, to change the topic. "So they really think he left on his own. But you don't"
Pleakley again looked uncomfortable about the subject "We've been on the island for over two years and I can promise you, he showed no signs of wanting to leave. He honestly seemed happy here"
"…but" Max said, as if filling in the missing word.
"But, Jumba lived in a section of Nani's house that he renovated. There was security and camera's…"
Max nodded. This point had been gone over previously. When Pleakley had looked over the footage of Jumba in his quarters, it showed him sleeping, then waking up suddenly in the middle of the night and then just leave. No struggle. No sign he had been called. He just walked out the house and disappeared.
"Doesn't look good" Max said evenly
"Maybe so, but I honestly cannot believe he just left. Not without saying goodbye at least"
Oh for the love of…
"In any case, I will need to remain in this…" Pleakley looked over to the window of the office and took in the run down street outside "… fascinating city to investigate" He said this last part like a kid in a candy store. Max could even see his one eye glaze over.
"You will remain with me, if you don't mind. And we should remain close to Max so we can properly organise the investigation" Bubbles said evenly.
"You can use the rooms upstairs. They aren't taken" Max said distractedly, looking over his notes on the case.
"We can use those?"
"What?" Max said looking up at the pair. "Oh, yeah. Technically I own the building so, yeah. Go crazy up there"
Max waved them off already losing interest in the pair. He needed time to go through the details.
As soon as the two left Max quickly relit another cigarette and leaned back in the office chair.
Another case… another case involving Aliens... What was that thing Stitch shouted at me in the car park? Max thought idly as he blew out smoke rings.
"Oh yeah" Max said tiredly as he recalled the alien profanity. Just as he leaned back however a sudden wave of fatigue hit him like a stone, as if it had been waiting for him to let his guard down.
"Meega, nala kwishta" Max muttered before, finally, drifting off to sleep.