AN: I hope you guys enjoy this chapter, despite the rough ending of the last chapter, this one was pretty fun to write.
Read and review, friends!
"People have forgotten this truth," the fox said. "But you mustn't forget it. You become responsible forever for what you've tamed. You're responsible for your rose."
― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince
or
"The price of greatness is responsibility."
― Winston S. Churchill
Chapter Twenty: Of Crooked Crowns and Children's Books He had lost both of them.
It had happened only two months ago, and everyone seemed to have moved on, forgotten maybe, and he still felt it every day. It hurt, to lose his father, and his sister, and he wasn't allotted that much time to grieve. The funeral services had been held the next day, and immediately following this, one of his father's old advisors had walked James through his coronation. He had the crown placed on his head and then he officially met 'the council' which was made up entirely of nobles and made James uncomfortable with all of their demands and looks of mistrust they kept shooting him.
"I can't do this." James said, walking into Dumbledore's quarters and tossing his crown onto the table. It made an ugly clatter as it bounced around.
"You're going to break that." Sirius said, seated by the fire with his feet up on the wall.
"Hell if I care, they should never have given it to me."
"I for one could not be happier that our king has such confidence in himself." Sirius dropped his feet to the floor and walked over to the table, picking up the crown and placing it on his own head. "Maybe you should give me the crown. I think it suits me." He took a look in the looking glass that hung on the wall near the door.
"You couldn't do worse than me." James muttered.
"Stop that." Remus walked out of his room with a book in his hand. "Both of you. James you're a great king. Sirius, you're an arse and you look ridiculous."
"You didn't say anything about me." Lily said, also walking out of Remus's room with a few books of her own. They had taken to meeting here after James' council meetings every afternoon. Dumbledore and Remus had been collecting so many new books lately that they had run out of space in the main room and taken to using Remus's room as a miniature library.
"You're lovely." James sighed, sounding nothing but sincere as he fell onto the bench and rested his head on the table. Lily gave him a small smile that went unnoticed as he covered his face with his hands and huffed. "I can't do this anymore. I know I can't stop being king, but I can't do these council meetings anymore. I mean, why are these men even on the council. They didn't do anything, they were born into a rich family and that's their only qualification. My father kept them complacent so that we could have their money. I hate all of them."
"Here, here!" Sirius cheered, raising a fist, James' crown now crooked atop his head.
"Then change it." Lily said, sitting across from him.
"I can't do that."
"Why not?" She asked, raising a brow. "You've been king for two months and you've yet to change any of the rules that you said you would change before you were king."
"Because I'm not naive anymore," He sighed. "I've realized that my father didn't make most of the laws that govern our land, he was just the enforcer. The council makes the laws, maybe not directly, but they do make them. You know what they were talking about today? How more of the people's crop yields need to be coming into the kingdom because they were running out of wheat. I told them that the only reason there was a shortage was because we gave some of our extra food to Leefside after the fire, and do you know what they suggested? Taking it back." Remus let out a humorless laugh. "And on top of that, I've got both Arden and Amos hounding me to name a new head of the Knights." He looked over at Sirius with his brow raised.
"No."
"You could do it though," James sighed. "And I'm telling you to, as your king."
"I don't care." Sirius said. "I'm not going to train those tossers, I don't even train with them most of the time. Just give the job to Arden. Everyone likes him more."
"Yes, but that would be a slight to Amos."
"He would understand." Remus said. "If you explained it well enough."
"No, he wouldn't." James slammed his fist against the table. "You don't understand. There's an order to the kingdom that's been in place since this damned castle was built. There's those who are in charge, and those who are not. The sacred twenty-eight, have power over the kingdom, over the king. Everyone else has to keep them happy if they want to keep whatever status that they've managed to make for themselves. Amos is a Digory, his house is closely related to the Abbotts, which is a family in the sacred twenty-eight. The Weasley's not only never made the list, but they were all but blackballed after a dozen of their cousins either married below their status or were imprisoned for theft or for using magic. I can't just give Arden the job because people like him more, because while I might be able to convince Amos that it was best for everyone, I would never be able to convince his father or his maternal grandfather of that. Arden is a great knight, but I remember when I asked my dad if I could make him a knight. The council met for two weeks before they came to a decision."
"You asked Sirius to do it though."
"Sirius is better than any of those prat's kids, with or without a sword. I wouldn't mind angering everyone on his behalf. Also, I'm pretty sure Sirius could take the fallout, they would eat Arden alive though."
"So, what you're really saying here is that you can't do your job effectively with all of these men around you only looking out for their own best interests?" Lily said, a sly grin on her face.
"Yes." James said, not quite sure where she was going with this.
"Then change it!" She cried, standing up from the table and walking over to one of the many bookshelves. She ran her finger along the spines of a few before finding the one that she was looking for. "Do you remember this book?" She walked back over and handed it to him.
"A Table with No Head." He laughed and nodded. "Yeah, we read this a couple weeks ago." Lily flipped it open to the very last page. James watched her as she read the last line of the story over his shoulder.
"The table was small with a crack down the middle, but anyone would tell you she was fine. It wasn't the wood that made her a beaut but the feelings she garnered inside. Nobody felt taller, and nobody felt smaller, when they sat at a table with no head." She turned her head towards him and smiled, taking a quick step back in the process noticing how close they were. James might have noticed her faint blush if he weren't so distracted by her smile and the quote she had just read.
"Yes, it's a very nice story, Lily. I don't know what you're getting at however."
"You don't like the power structure, right? You don't like that some people hold power over others when they shouldn't?" James nodded. "Then cut the head off the table! Figuratively of course, tables don't actually have heads- but if you want to disband your council, then disband it."
James stood up and smiled at her. "I would love to do that. But without the council members happy, the kingdoms vaults would dry up and then what?"
"There are other rich families out there, James. Maybe you're just doing business with the wrong ones?" She shrugged and then took her cloak off the hook by the door. "I need to run now, Dumbledore talked to the nurse over at the hospital so I have a job again and Poppy doesn't listen to excuses when it comes to tardiness." She waved to all of them, and then spun on her heel and walked out of the room.
"A table with no head?" Sirius took the book from him and flipped through it. "So it's just a round table? How did someone write an entire book about a round table?"
"It's not about a table." James said thoughtfully, "It's about stripping away the power and creating an opportunity for equality. At a round table, no one holds more power than anyone else seated there." His mind was racing again, and for the first time in months, he was starting to feel as though he might be able to accomplish something. "A round table." He repeated quietly.
"You look like you have an idea." Remus said, looking up from his stack of books.
"Part of one." James nodded. "I've got to go- Meet me in the throne room in an hour."
"You're about to do something impulsive and stupid aren't you?" Remus asked, smiling despite his tone.
"Impulsive, yes. Hopefully not stupid." With that, he turned and ran out of the room.
"He's going to make a round table isn't he?" Sirius asked. "He's going to take her point literally and make an actual round table."
"I wouldn't put it past him." Remus shrugged.
oOoOo
It wasn't a secret that James favored the knights over the castle guard, as one he trained to be fierce warriors, and, well he frequently jested that anyone and their sister could be a castle guard. Remus had become accustomed to this, he knew that it stemmed more from James' pride in his knights, than his actual distaste of the castle guard. As far as Remus could tell, the castle guard were good, very tolerant men.
However, when Remus walked into the throne room with Sirius an hour after James had ran out of Dumbledore's quarters, what he found was a bit more than he was ready to deal with.
"No, no, no," James sighed and grabbed the man he was addressing by the shoulders. "I told you to stand here." He pulled him a few feet to the left and then jumped back and climbed up the steps towards the throne to get a better look. What he was looking at was a room full of castle guards that he had placed in specific places throughout the room. Some of them were linking arms, some of them where facing others, and one of them was standing in the corner of the room. Remus took a deep breath and then walked through the men, careful to avoid those that were linked at the arm, and walked up the steps so he was next to James. Sirius had followed him, instead of looking exasperated as Remus did, he was torn between amusement and confusion.
"James," Remus nudged him with his elbow. "What are you doing here, mate?"
"Everyone take a seat." James called out, ignoring Remus' question. Remus glanced over at Sirius, but he was surveying the mass of men who were simultaneously taking a seat on the floor. He didn't seem at all concerned about their current location. Remus however was acutely aware of the fact that this was the first time that James had set foot in the throne room since the night that Bellatrix had killed his father, and he knew that it had happened not ten feet from where they were standing. There had been no blood to clean up, no stains to make the spot, but Remus knew exactly where it had happened, and he knew that James did as well.
"So, what are we looking at here?" Sirius asked, now trying to make sense of the seated guards while playing with James crown that he was still wearing. "Aside from some very patient men whom you are using as props."
"Floor plans." James said. He jumped down the stairs and ran over to the group of men who were linked at the arm. There were a few more than a dozen, and they had their arms linked so that the lot of them created a circle. "This is the table, see." He motioned his hand around them. "And these men are the chairs," He touched one of the men's shoulders. Remus could see it now, he wasn't sure why James had thought that this was necessary, but he could see it.
"And who's that?" Sirius asked, pointing to the man in the corner.
"That's Philip. He didn't want to be a chair so I told him he could stand in the corner."
"Philip, you don't have to stand in the corner." Remus sighed, calling out to the man.
"Yes he does." James said, Philip had taken a step away from the wall and at James' voice moved it back.
"No, he doesn't. You can't punish someone for not wanting to be your plaything."
"Come here, Phil." Sirius called out. Philip hesitated this time, but when James didn't immediately tell him to get back in the corner, he walked across the room and knelt before James. "It's alright to listen to me, look, I'm wearing the King's crown. Who's in charge of you lot?" Sirius asked.
"The king, sir." He said, still kneeling.
"Unfortunately, yes- but who is head of the castle guard?"
Philip looked up, his lips pressed into a hard line. "You're the head of the castle guard, aren't you?" Remus asked. Philip nodded. "You can escort your men out of the throne room. Right, James?"
"Yes, fine." James sighed and then walked over to the throne and took a seat on the very edge. "I'm only trying to do some actual good for this kingdom."
"Of course you are, mate." Sirius picked the crown off his head and put it on James. "And I for one think your round table of humans was inspired." He clapped him on the back, and James glared at him. "But you have to admit that it was a bit demeaning for all those involved. Especially poor, Phil."
"I need to talk to a carpenter."
"You really want to build a table?" Remus asked. "Is that really going to solve everything?"
"No." James shook his head. "But it's not about solving everything, it's just about solving what I can. The kingdom deserves a better group of people looking over it than the one that it currently has, so I'm going to fix that." He stood up and started walking out of the throne room, "I want to hold a tourney as well. We never had one for my coronation due to the circumstances, but I think we should have one now. It will help me choose who gets to sit at the table. It's also a good venue to announce some changes to the law. First and foremost, I decree that from this day on, you no longer need to be of noble decent to become a knight of the realm, you must only prove your courage, strength and loyalty to the crown."
"To you?" Sirius asked.
James looked uncomfortable. "I suppose that's what that means now."
"You know when Lily was reading you that passage from A Table with No Head, she wasn't telling you to go and make a circular table, right?" Remus said, looking around the room where the guards had just been.
"It's a round table, and yes, I know she wasn't but I have a good feeling about this. You've just got to trust me."
oOoOo
It was the first big thing that James had done since becoming king, and so people were eager to see it done quickly. Invitations were sent out, tents were raised, fields were cleared, stands were built, and the prizes were set. James walked quickly through the streets, ignoring all the hustle going on around him in search for Lily. She didn't really know it, but this idea he had stemmed from what she had told him.
His boots were muddy from having been helping his knights set up archery posts in their back training field earlier, and his trousers had a hole in the knee because Sirius had shoved him while they were setting up some of the stands. His hair was a bit more out of control, and his shirt kept coming untucked, but his cheeks were flushed with color and his eyes were bright. He was feeling good today, and this was the first time he could say that honestly in months. Maybe since before he found out about Bella.
Lily wasn't hard to spot, though she never was, her hair made sure of that. She was standing just inside the doorway of her house, sweeping the floor. Her hair was loose, falling in large ringlets past her shoulders, and she was wearing her blue dress today. James liked her blue dress.
"Good afternoon." He said with a smile, coming to a stop in the doorway and leaning against the frame. Lily looked up, not at all surprised to see him there.
"Afternoon." She replied, a smile of her own appearing on her lips. "What brings you here? And in that state," She laughed and reached out to brush some of the dirt off his shoulder. "I think for the first time, you might be covered in more dirt that me." He reached up and caught her hand in his. She looked at their hands and then up at him, the look she wore was demanding an explanation as softly as it could. His grinned widened, and he complied.
"I want to show you something." He said, giving her hand a slight tug and stepping out of the doorframe. She set the broom up against the wall and stepped out onto the street after him, closing the door behind her.
"And what are you going to show me?"
James squeezed her hand and narrowed his eyes playfully. "It's a surprise." Lily pursed her lips, but James could see amusement there, so he started walking, keeping her hand in his and trying not to think too much of it when she didn't try to extract her hand.
People parted quickly when they saw him coming, even dressed as he was, they knew he was their king. It had been like this before of course, when he was prince, but there was something different now, people seemed to stare a bit longer, whisper a bit louder, move back a bit further-
Lily pulled her hand out of his quite abruptly and James stopped walking. "What's wrong?" He asked. He had looked before they left her house for any indication that she was uncomfortable with their handholding. He may not have recognized exactly what he saw, but he knew that it wasn't discomfort.
"Nothing." She muttered, crossing her arms over her chest and glancing around the street. James did the same, but all he saw was what he had seen before, people watching him and whispering behind their hands.
"Are you shy?" He asked, a smile coming back.
"No," She said, "Let's just go." She started forward, but James didn't like that answer. He placed a hand on her shoulder and walked in front of her so they were face to face.
"Don't let them bother you, Lily. Their gaze follows me wherever I go- and before you say anything, this has nothing to do with my ego and everything to do with the fact that I'm their king."
"And they're not used to seeing you with someone like me." Lily said, meeting his eyes.
"What?"
"You're their king, and I'm- I'm," She laughed. "I'm sort of a nurse now I guess. I'm the daughter of a blacksmith and the former maid to someone who-" She cut off abruptly and shook her head. "They don't approve of our- you know- friendship."
"Friendship." The word tasted wrong in his mouth, but that wasn't the problem he needed to focus on at the moment. "Well, normally I wouldn't say this, but to hell with them."
"James, it's not that simple." Lily sighed, pushing her hair back over her shoulders. "When you came up to my house, just a few moments ago, do you know what I was doing? I was cleaning up shards of glass. People expect you to-"
"Shards of glass?" James interrupted.
"Yes," She shifted uncomfortably, looking unsure of how she wanted to continue. "Don't get upset, but people haven't taken too kindly to you- to us- My family is very poor and you're the king."
"Someone threw glass at you?"
"Not at me, just into my house." Lily said quickly.
James' hands clenched and he rocked forward and then back onto his heels. "Why would they do that?" He threw a glare at the nearest gossiper, who quickly cowered away.
"Because it's not right." Lily said, putting a hand on his arm and pushing him up the road. James couldn't relax until they had made it to the courtyard, where there were only a few castle guards at their post and they didn't find it necessary to whisper. Lily dropped her hand when she felt him relax and stopped walking. "People expect you to surround yourself with nobles and I'm about the furthest thing from a noble woman."
James now clenched his teeth, but attempted to appear calm. He had enough working against him when it came to Lily without the entire kingdom working to get her to believe that she's not worthy of being near him. He wanted her near him, he wanted her very near him. And now that he was finally making progress, now that she was spending more time with James outside of him teaching her to read, now that they were not both in immediate danger and things were finally starting to calm down after everything that had happened; now it was his people that were working against him.
"You've got that look on your face." Lily said, her cheeks blushed a light shade of pink.
"And what look would that be?" James sighed, very much wanting to reach out and hold her hand again. Lily's blush intensified, she bit her lip and James had to clench his jaw for an entirely different reason.
"It's just that sometimes you get this look on your face," She tucked her hair behind her ears and then shrugged. "And then you tell me that you love me."
"I love you."
"I-" She closed her eyes and pressed her lips together. "You shouldn't."
James stepped forwards before he could think, cupped Lily's face in his hands and pressed his lips to her forehead. He held her like that longer than he should have and then pulled away. He smiled down at her, waiting until she opened her eyes to say, "Can I show you the surprise now?" Lily blinked rapidly and then nodded. She reached for his hand this time and he gave it a light squeeze.
"Alright," He said, as they neared the throne room. "Do you remember a few weeks ago, quoting The Table with no Head to me?" She nodded. "Well, I may have taken your advice rather literally and I want you to be the first to see it." Lily narrowed her eyes and James pushed open the door just enough for them to slip inside.
They stood on the inside of the throne room in silence for a few moments, James watching Lily's reaction and Lily staring at what was before her. "You made and actual round table?" She asked incredulously. She laughed. "You made an actual round table!"
"I did." James nodded. Lily shook her head and walked up to it. It was very large, oak table, with thirteen great oak chairs placed at equal intervals around it. "Well, I had someone else make it of course, I wouldn't know how, but-"
"What are you going to do with it?" Lily asked, her eyes darting around the room. "And where is the throne?"
"It's been moved to the Great Hall. I'm going to make a new council, like you said I should. This new council will be made up of people who understand that it is their job to protect and serve the people of the land, not their own interests. They will have to earn their seat by proving their honor and selflessness, and if they should ever dishonor themselves, or disgrace what the table stands for in anyway, they will be asked to step down and someone else with take their seat."
"And how are you going to test people's honor and selflessness?" Lily asked.
"With the tourney." He said. "I don't think I'll find all twelve men that I'm looking for, but still, it's a place to start." Lily walked over to the table and ran her fingers along one of the chairs. "I just want to do what's right for the people."
Lily turned towards him and smiled, warming his insides. "You're going to be a great king. You know that, right?" There was a pull in his navel and one of his feet took a step forward without his permission. He loved this woman with his entire being and he didn't know what to do about it. He was standing here, trying to force himself not to run across the room and kiss her, but he couldn't convince himself that she would mind if he did. His other foot found it's way in front of the first.
She was everything good in his life, she was warm and open, soft and loving. She gave every relationship her all and when she smiled at him he felt as though he would burst apart and catch fire all at once. She was his safe place, and his sunny day, his reason to keep fighting, to find a better way. Another step forward, only this time she mimicked his movement.
James stopped thinking entirely and looked at her face. She had gone very pale, and was torn between looking absolutely terrified and painfully hopeful, though there was a chance that he was projecting his own feelings onto her. Her step was smaller than his had been, but she didn't wait as long to take another step. And then another.
She was walking at a steady pace and James had just kind of frozen where he was, not able to get his feet to move. And then he looked at her face again, really looked at it and saw that it had gone soft. When she reached him, she didn't kiss him as he thought she was going to, she smiled at him and wrapped her arms around his neck.
He sighed, trying to push his disappointment aside, because a hug was nice too, a hug had her close to him and wasn't that what he really wanted? He couldn't stop himself from laughing.
"What are you laughing at?" Lily said, pulling her head back to look at him without dropping her arms.
"Nothing." He pulled her back against him. "Let's go find the lads, yes?"
"Alright." She pulled away. "What do you have them doing?"
"Setting up for the tourney of course."
"You were helping them weren't you. That's why you look as filthy as you do?"
"Filthy is a strong word." Lily pressed her lips together and shook her head.
"If you say so."
OOoOo
There were five hundred and sixty seven stone blocks making up the room they had put her in. Five hundred and sixty seven stone blocks, only two windows and both of them too high to see out of. She had counted five hundred and sixty seven stone blocks fourteen times now, the second time only getting five hundred and sixty six and after double checking, the numbers started to sooth her. She started to find solace in the rhythm of the words she muttered under her breath, she started to find comfort in the way the number would come with another beat of her heart and a soft breath and she kept moving her eyes around the room because if she kept looking at the wall, if she kept counting to five hundred and sixty seven than she didn't have to think.
She had no idea how long she had been in this room, but she wished it was made of more stone blocks, she wished there was an infinite number so that she never had to stop counting, because whenever she ran out of numbers, she would have to pause and in that briefest pause, she would hear what he had said to her. She would hear him call out… and then she would hear James… and then she would start over at one.
"Bella?" Someone walked into the room without knocking, but Bella didn't let that deter her counting. "The Dark Lord would like to see you."
She took a deep breath and pressed her lips together. Do it now, Bella! She pulled at her hair and asked, "Is that a request?"
"The Dark Lord doesn't make requests." She didn't know who was in the room, and she didn't care. She brushed off her dress and started counting her steps.
She hadn't seen the Dark Lord in a few weeks now, and all of their interaction since he forced her to kill King Charles had been silent on her end, and she couldn't tell anyone what he had said to her because she hadn't paid attention. It hadn't been intentional per say, but whenever he opened his mouth, her head would get very loud and she couldn't focus, she couldn't hear him over the other voices.
She was being led down a dimly lit corridor and she had counted to two hundred and thirty six steps before whoever she was with stopped in front of a door and motioned for her to go inside. She looked up at them for the first time and saw that it was Rookwood's son Alvin. He was four or five years younger than Bella, and she couldn't understand why he was here. He was too young to be involved with something like this, to be near someone like Voldemort.
"He's waiting." Alvin said quietly.
Bella tried to smile at him, and then turned towards the doors and pushed one open. She didn't want to see him, she didn't want to talk to him, she wanted to leave. She wanted to go and find James, tell him what happened, that she was sorry for getting tangled up in all of this mess and that she would do whatever he said in order to regain his trust. She had messed up, but she didn't want to lose her brother, she didn't want to lose James.
"Bellatrix Black." Voldemort's voice drew her attention to the left side of the room, where he was seated at the head of a long oak table. She saw Severus Snape stand up and excuse himself. He walked passed her and gave her a slight nod before exiting the room and closing the door behind him. Closing the door behind Bella. And then they were alone. "Come and sit down. We have much to discuss." He didn't sound upset with her, which should have made her relieved, but it only made her suspicious. What was he going to tell her to do next? What did he need her to do now?
"I'd rather-" She thought about arguing with him, but after the first two words, she was already exhausted and so she slowly walked across the room and took a seat at the table, making sure to leave two empty seats between Voldemort and herself. "What is it now?" She sighed, resting her head on her left hand.
Voldemort smiled at her and she felt herself shiver. She hated this man.
"I didn't do this to you." He said quietly, still smiling. "I didn't turn you into what you are now. If you didn't want to kill Charles, you wouldn't have killed him."
"I never said you turned me into anything." She turned her head so she was looking down at the table. "And you didn't give me much of a choice. If I didn't kill Charles, you would have killed him and James."
"You had tried to kill Charles earlier." He pointed out. "You almost succeeded. You would have succeeded if there were not others in the castle who practiced magic and recognized it's properties."
Bella took a deep breath and considered this. "The Charles that I tried to kill and the Charles that you had me kill were two entirely different people. The fire that killed my mother, it wasn't set by the king."
"It was your father's brave attempt at killing a dangerous foe. He would be proud of you."
"I don't want him to be proud of me." Bella snapped, turning to glare at Voldemort. "He murdered one of my friends, he burned my mother alive, I would be dead too if he had his way. He told Charles not to rescue me. My father was a horrible man and I don't want to make him proud of me."
"He made sure that your sisters survived."
Bella laughed at this. "They survived because my mother threw them out a window. They're lucky that the fall didn't break their necks."
"Well than we'll have to agree to disagree on the topic of your father. And Charles apparently. No matter, you have done as you were told and I have allowed you to wallow in misery for long enough now. It's time we start prepping you for the throne."
"I don't want the throne." Bella said through gritted teeth. "I told you that I don't-"
"Not the Hogwarts throne." Voldemort interrupted, his jaw a bit tight as he did. "Not yet." He added quietly. "There are more kingdoms than just Camelot. I want you and Rodolpus to take charge of Durmstrang castle. It's farther north, and while the people there have a higher tolerance for magic, it's always good to have people I trust in positions of power."
"You still want me to marry Rod?"
"I'm giving you a throne." Voldemort snapped. "Why can't you just appreciate that?" He pushed away from the table, the legs of his chair scratching violently against the floor. When he stood up and clasped his hands behind his back and started pacing the length of the table in front of Bella. "I gave you a chance to prove yourself, I allowed you to disobey me and gave you yet another chance to prove yourself. I showed more patients than any man has ever had to for a woman these last three months and gave you the time you needed to piece yourself back together and now I am handing you a crown and you are still not satisfied? What more could I possibly do?"
Bella's brow had knit together sometime in the middle of his speech and she wasn't quite sure what to make of it. She had never wanted to marry Rod, so she thought it was fair to point that out, but he the way he was talking it was like he was trying to make her happy, trying to fit her in somewhere. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"I've given you everything!" He shouted, banging his fists on the table. "These past three months you have had nothing but the finest of everything. You have servants waiting on your every need, you have had the best food available, the most expensive gowns- More than that, I made you see who you really are."
"I didn't ask for any of that." Bella said, her mind reeling. He had forced her to kill perhaps the only person who had ever truly accepted her but it seemed as though he had warped that in his mind somehow. He seemed to think that he had shown her what she was capable of, that he had awoken something inside her that she hadn't been aware of before, but that wasn't true. She hadn't wanted to kill the king, but she never had a problem with ending people's lives before that. When she would get caught using magic and randomly point to a man that she would claim to have seen cast a spell, she knew exactly what would happen to him and, part of her, a terrible part of her, reveled in it. "And the only thing you did was force my hand. I'm not now anything I wasn't before, the only difference is that other people can see me. I'm no longer lurking in the shadows, I no longer have the protection of the king-"
"You have my protection." He said slowly, a smile growing on his lips again. "You have my protection and you are allowed to be whoever you want. You're allowed to use your magic, and you're allowed to be violent, and no one is going to say anything against you."
Bella took a slow breath and studied the man before her. He was old enough to be her father, but the way he was looking at her, he didn't seem aware of this. And she hadn't realized that what he was saying, at least what he was saying now, was true. She didn't have to hide anymore, she didn't have to pretend to be something that she wasn't, she was free. She could use her magic, show off a part of herself that she had been forced to keep hidden.
"You take people's magic." She said carefully, standing up and stepping away from the table, holding his gaze as she did. "You killed Regulus Black, my cousin."
"You don't get power unless you take it." He replied calmly. Bella found herself nodding, as though this made sense, as though this wasn't him casually tossing aside the life of someone that she had loved. "And I would never take your magic." And she believed him.
"I know." She said, and then with a coy smile she added. "I wouldn't let you." His smile grew.