I do not own Divergent. Credit goes to Veronica Roth.

The night air was cold. It was going to be getting colder now. I pulled the wrap around me tightly and continued to sit there. Maybe I was wrong and just fooling myself into thinking that he would show. Maybe he was going to leave me here waiting for him just as I had left him and decided to stay in Amity. Regardless of whether he came or not, I was still going to get an answer. If Eric didn't show then that meant that he did no longer care about me and then that would be that.

Three nights ago I had contacted Eric after my conversation with my mother and to my surprise he picked up almost immediately. He didn't greet me or even smile. There was a strong look of relief that washed over him but then quickly faded when I smiled and said 'hello'. We stayed quiet for who knows how long. The silenced had been deafening. I had even started to quietly sob. I never knew that was possible but the tears came out and every time I opened my mouth not one little whimper came out. Eric just stared back at me. His eyes were hard and cold.

I shivered unexpectedly thinking about how he looked at me. A small yelp from Smoke came out as he walked rested on his stomach on the grass. I patted his head behind his ears before he put his head back down. Looking away from him I realized something. It had gotten completely dark out here. How long had I been waiting out here by the river? Did Eric really mean to not come after all?

"What do you want Miss Summers," he snarled at me after a half hour of just awkward silence through the communication glass.

"I needed to speak with you, Eric. I miss you and..."

"Don't say it if you don't mean it."

"But I..."

"I mean it JoyAnna," he growled. I didn't like how he spoke. It was dark and full of hate. "Don't tell me one thing and then do another. You know what," he shook his head. "I don't even know why I answered. I don't even know why I had carried this with me to Dauntless. Don't try to make contact with me again."

"Eric please," I begged. "Let me explain. Just give me one minute to..."

"What do you have there, Eric?"

Panic flooded into me. Miss Sanders. That was Miss Phoebe Sanders. She had followed Eric to Dauntless. She was the one that was near him right now. Eric tilted his head back and let out a sigh. She had followed him whereas I did not. She made a choice to be with him and I chose not to.

"Never mind," I said causing Eric to look back at me. "Goodbye Eric."

"Wait," he called out just as my hand hovered over the button to end the call. I looked up at the glass to see him staring at me intently. After a deep sigh Eric shook his head. "I'd never surrender," he said quietly looking away.

"What," I asked confused about what he was saying.

"I had told you once that I would never surrender. What do you need to talk about?"

"Us," was the simple answer that I gave him.

Eric was quiet for a while as he thought about something.

"Can you get out of Amity?"

"Right now," I questioned.

Eric shook his head. "I can't leave right now. Three days from now, just before dinner, let's meet at our spot by the river," Eric said. "We'll talk then."

Just like that a plan was presented to me and Eric had ended the call. I had not heard from him since. But I counted down the days and ended up coming out here. I had bought Smoke with me, an excuse as to why I had been this far out of the Amity borders. Now it was dark. I should have known that Eric was just going to lead me out here and never show. This was his way of getting back at me. He truly didn't like me.

Smoke had come over and licked my face causing me to gasp. I turned to him with a small smile as he danced around a bit.

"Okay, we'll head back. I don't think he's coming," I patted Smoke on his head and got up from the log.

Just as I scoop up my bag that I bought with some snacks, Smoke starts to growl towards the darkness in the trees. I gulp and pray that it's nothing out of the ordinary. Dauntless patrol changed their shifts around this time so for a good two hours or so there is no one out here. There is no one to watch if I'm dragged off by some wild animal. There is no one to watch if I'm taken by some greedy man as Starlet had been. My father had been the one to find her and since then no one had ventured out of the Amity border that late at night. Well, except for me, I rolled my eyes.

I threw the bag around my shoulder and grabbed on a fistful of Smoke's fur pulling him towards me and back into Amity. Quickly though a whistle sounded and Smoke took off towards the woods.

I am confused between going after him or running back to Amity. My hand begins to grip onto the strap of the bag on my shoulder. The air is tense and I don't hear anything else escaping the darkness. There's no sound of Smoke being hurt or running back. There is simply just nothing and for the first time I feel utterly helpless. Of course I couldn't help but think that this was all Eric's doing. He suggested I come out here and then leave me high and dry to get back at me for not following him. Then I could get hurt or attacked and no one would know. That would be the ultimate revenge.

No, I shook my head. Eric would not seek revenge. I had to believe that.

A sound made my head snap back up to attention. I turned to run and got a few steps forward when I heard him.

"Ana?"

Only one person called me that. I looked around, scanning my eyes through the shadows as I saw his figure appear.

"Eric," I stated.

And before neither of us said anything else, I ran up to him and threw my arms around him. It's not long until I feel him wrap his arms around me too and give me a reassuring squeeze. My hands relax from their hold and instead are placed between the two of us, my palms flat on his chest as Eric pulls back a little. I can see his eyes looking down at me through the moonlight and I realized that I might never see it again.

"I hate you."

I shook my head unable to grasp that he had said something so menacing and it was directed to me.

"I hate that I think about you all the time," he continued ignoring the alarming look on my face. "I hate that every other girls' smile looks hideous compared to yours. I hate that you say my name like it is the most precious thing to speak of. I hate how everything reminds me of what used to be. I hate that the pillows don't even feel soft as you. I hate that the food tastes horrible now. I hate that all of it Ana! I hate that you took it all away from me!"

"I'm sorry," I whispered as Eric shakes his head again before releasing me and taking a few steps away.

"I stood there at the choosing ceremony like an idiot. Half of Dauntless had already left," he faced away from me. "I thought maybe I had heard wrong. That maybe you were going to walk behind me any minute and take my hand and we would go into Dauntless together," he turned around. "But you never came."

I close my eyes while Eric starts to walk back.

"I saw everything slip away from me. Everything," he repeated. "I hated that I felt nothing. I hated that I couldn't even smile. I tried to distract myself with Phoebe. I even stuck my tongue down her throat."

I shifted uncomfortably, opening my eyes to look down at the ground. The idea of Eric kissing someone else was hard for me to stomach. It was hard for me to get out of my head too at the moment. I had never felt such anger, such disgust. The worst part about it was that I had felt hurt all over again. Eric had finally came back to stand right in front of me.

"I hate that my body rejected her but the second that I saw your face, your eyes, you smile," he reached out and touched my cheek gently. "Everything about me was on fire. And I hate it Ana! I hate that I'm so in love with you!"

"I'm still in love with you," I whisper.

The hurt and anger that donned on his face is now gone. I never thought it would be possible but the grey-ish smoke that seems to dance around in his eyes like the clouds in the sky are gone.

"It's why I had to see you or talk to you at least," I tore myself away from his gaze. "I cried myself to sleep every night since the choosing ceremony. I even begged for them to shoot me with the peace serum to make me happy, make me forget the pain I was feeling. Serenity told me I needed to find peace without it, that this turmoil was in my heart and no serum could fix it."

Eric scoffed a little before I saw the corners of his lips twitch up. "You've been hanging out with Serenity?"

I couldn't help the small laugh that escaped me too. "Yes I have. She has been kind with everything but not as helpful as my mother. I told her how I was feeling, that you were my first love and how it hurt so much and she told me that you were probably feeling the same. My mother said that your first love when it is true it is the hardest to get rid of. If she had one more moment with my father she knew it would bring her comfort. I should give you one more moment too."

"She wants one more moment with your father? Did he leave," Eric asked.

I closed my eyes as a tear fell. "My father passed. They could not calm me down when I heard the news," my eyes stayed shut. "My brother Jack tried to hold me but I just kept screaming at them. Eventually my younger brothers took the loss the same way. The house was in chaos."

"That's why you were kept with the Counselor at school," Eric stated more so than questioned.

"The day of the aptitude test, I was going to tell you Eric. I wanted to tell you but I didn't want to accept that my father was gone. I walk out on the back porch now and sometimes my mother sits there curled up in his chair," I shook my head. "I keep walking out there. I keep thinking if I do it enough times, that he'll show up. But he won't and it breaks me every time I hear my mother's sniffled cries."

"Your father is really gone?"

I nodded looking up at him, my eyes heavy with tears. My face was wet and I felt weak and miserable as the day that my father had passed. Within seconds Eric had pulled me into his arms and held me tightly against his chest.

We say nothing for what seems like an eternity. It was comforting to be with him again. Somehow without saying anything, he removes our bodies from our embrace and taking my hand he begins to lead me over towards a spot where we would sit and watch the sun set. Soon I find myself sitting in his lap, my head resting on his shoulder and his arms wrapped around me.

The air isn't as cold as I feel Smoke come by us and lay down at Eric's side. We manage to find sleep.

With hours we are awakened by Smoke pulling at my skirt. I turn to see Eric staring off past my head at Amity. I wanted to say at that moment that my mother was right. I did find contentment in speaking to Eric this one more time. Last night I went to sleep filled with peace that he had known but it seemed as we woke up that I had been thrust back into this hellish nightmare.

"The sun is about to come up," Eric whispered bitterly.

"You have to head back soon, don't you?"

Eric shook his head. "I didn't want our time together to be like this Ana. I didn't want us restricted by factions."

"I know Eric."

"Why Ana," he asked looking back at me. "I understand that your father passed but..."

"My mother is pregnant," I responded. "And with my father passing I couldn't leave her. I couldn't leave my brothers. It doesn't mean that I love you any less Eric."

I moved to sit up and he turned his eyes towards me. "Do you really?"

"I do. I love you. I always will."

"You could have called me on the tablet," he replied. "I thought you didn't feel the same. I kept thinking that," he shook his head. "I kept thinking that I wasn't important anymore."

"You are important to me Eric. And I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I honestly didn't decide on staying back in Amity until I was up there, slicing the blade over my hand. I didn't want to talk to you after that. I kept thinking that you would forget me."

"How could I forget someone who means so much to me?"

"The same way I couldn't stop crying every time I thought about you," I offered. "It became apparent that I had to tell you. My mother said it was not fair that you weren't informed of my decision."

"It wasn't," Eric mumbled.

"It's a decision I made though Eric and I'm sorry that we both have to live with the consequences of it. I hope you find happiness in Dauntless Eric. I hope that you..."

I was silenced by Eric pulling me further into his lap and crashing his lips onto mine. It was perfect and full of affection, passion and all those other things that I ever felt with Eric. There was also anger and hurt in the way he held me. It felt like this was our goodbye kiss. Eric pulled back and held my face in his hands. I opened my eyes to look back at him.

"I already did find my happiness. That joy I found made her decision to stay with her family. But I made my decision too."

Eric kissed me softly and then leaned his forehead against mine.

"And my decision is that I'm not giving her up and no faction is going to stop that. It never stopped it before and it won't stop it now."

Eric tilted my head again until our lips met. We kissed and held each other until the sky lit up. I had not noticed in the dark but Eric donned a black pant with a black shirt. It was shocking to see him with it at first. But I had to admit the sight before me was a handsome one. I ran my fingers slowly over the bottom of his jaw and asked what had happened.

"Initiation," he answered showing me his fist that was reddened at the knuckles.

"Oh Eric," I touched them softly.

"You should see the other guy," he joked as I looked up at him with a serious expression. "Enough about that," he kissed me tenderly. "Can I see you again?"

I nodded pulling away. "When," I whispered.

"I'll let you know."

We stood up, staring at each other with our hands locked on one another. Finally we pulled away, walking backwards slowly until we could see each other no more. And just before the sun completely rose in the sky I had already made my way back to Amity and Eric was probably already back at Dauntless.