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Chapter 19

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Whoops, I titled the last chapter '17' instead of '18'. I'll try to fix that later if I have time.

Hurrah! I have a week off from school!

Hopefully that means more writing time, but I still have the SAT to study for. Ugh, dang it. haha

Now enjoy:

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I sat up instantly, completely aware of my surroundings. My senses were clear and head fine- the only reason I looked as pale as a zombie is because of my anxiety.

My voice trembled, "HE'S BACK!"

Edmund jumped back slightly, he had been hovering over my limp body in concern. "What-"

"Vicern is back!" I screamed, not caring who heard. In fact, good! Let everyone know that the elf King was back. "Aslan has brought him home!"

Silence ensued and I stared at everyone, reading their reactions quickly. Edmund and Peter looked startled, Lucy happy with a bright grin, Caspian confused, Duke perplexed, and Susan... Well Susan ran up to me with a red face. "This isn't funny Kay!" She hissed. I winced, never had I heard Susan so angry.

"I'm not lying-"

"I loved him," Susan held a finger at me in accusation. "Don't you dare say such impossible things! It was a dream and nothing more, I will not have you raise hopes like this-"

"Wait," Duke took a step forward and raised an eyebrow at me. Suddenly, for the very first time, I didn't see him as my friend... Instead, I saw a mature and grown man. Blimey, he really had changed from the past few days. Can't say I'm surprised though, war changes people. "You had a vision didn't you?"

I began to smile at him, but immediately stopped when his eyes narrowed slightly. Damn, he was still pissed with me. Nervous, I looked away from him and instead nodded to Susan. "I did."

Then the most strangest thing happened.

Susan turned darker red- then purple- then pale- then pure white. Her arms snapped out and before I knew it, my shoulders were being crushed my her fingers. "Are. You. Sure."

I gaped at her, "Are you even breathing?"

"Just answer me!" She screamed.

My shoulders... they'll never be the same...

"Yes! He's back! Now let go!" I pleaded, and thankfully Susan released me. But she remained sitting at my side, her eyes never leaving my face. I could tell she was searching for any signs of doubt or uncertainty, but judging by the lack of color in her face I was confident that she found none.

"How?" Caspian asked, the only brave one to speak.

"The elves have been hiding in complex tunnels in the mountains, the entrance to their home is hidden." I stood up slowly, but I was pleased to find that I was fine. No wobbly knees or headache- thank Aslan. "I followed an elf in the tunnels until I came to a large cave, nearly as big as the dining hall in Cair Paravel. IT was obvious that it was there center, because they all ate in celebration... I soon realized they were celebrating the return of Vicern."

"Is he... you know, old?" Duke asked, giving a wary look to Susan.

"No," I shook my head in disbelief. "Believe it or not he's no older than when we first met him. Since we all grew a year older, Peter and I are about the same age as Vi now. And... well, he looks healthy, happy too."

"What did you do?" Peter questioned, "Did you let him know you were there?"

Doing my best to explain, I recounted the story. Susan had grabbed onto Edmund and had pressed her head into his chest, hiding her face. But it was obvious that she was crying... Her shoulders shook, but she remained silent. Everyone else was quiet, much too quiet if you ask me. It sounded like we were in a graveyard when I finished talking. No one spoke a word, even when the Narnians all left the Howe. Somehow they had understood that we humans needed a few minutes to ourselves.

And what was even more strange was that I found myself crying too, but not from sadness- instead happiness. I couldn't help it, the realization had hit me hard as I had told the others what happened. My dear friend was ALIVE! Oh my... I don't even know what to do. I didn't know what to say to Susan. I didn't know what to think!

"We should contact them." Duke murmured softly, breaking the silence.

Edmund nodded and continued to stroke his sister's hair. "Kay, you know where they are."

I wiped away a tear, I hadn't been weeping. At the most, only three tears actually fell from my eyes. I was still too much in shock to make anymore. "But I.. I don't know the mountains. We could spend days trying to find the cave's entrance! Sure, if we came across it I would recognize it, but those mountain ranges are massive-"

"And we can't spare you," Peter said indifferently. "We need you in battle."

Duke snorted, "What is she? A weapon? A thing?"

Oh no...

Peter's hands curled into fists and annoyance flickered on his face, but after a few moments of tension he relaxed. Yes, Peter was doing his best to keep in temper in control. Ignoring Duke, he turned to Caspian, "You are a fast rider, I think you should go."

"But I need to fight-"

"Actually, you don't." Ed put in. "We need you alive no matter what, you're the next in line for the throne. If we were victorious in battle but you were slain, then it would have been for nothing. By going to the mountains you will be safe, the Telmarines will be distracted by our army."

"That... That makes sense." I bit my lip, "But the trouble with that plan is..."

Lucy crossed her arms in authority, "If Caspian finds the elves they won't believe him. How are they supposed to know that he's telling the truth? They'll think he's just another Telmarine liar, and worse, has discovered the elves are alive. They'll take him prisoner so he won't share the secret."

"Well said," Peter admitted. "Then what should we do?"

"I'll go." Susan spoke up, with hard determination. She pulled away from her brother, not caring to dab at her puffy red eyes. "I'll go with Caspian. Vicern will trust me."

Peter and Ed exchanged glances, I could just hear their telepathic thoughts... Sure enough, after a few moments they nodded and Peter spoke, "Fine. We have a plan then. You'll need to leave now if we are to have the elves' help in battle in time."

"I'll ready the horses," Caspian offered and took off.

Eyeing him, I added, "And I'll draw you a sketch of the entrance."

Without waiting for a reply, I hastily followed after Caspian. True to what he said, he went straight to the stables. I lingered in the doorway for a few seconds, doing my best to form words in my head. Coming up with nothing, I decided to wing it. Straightening up, I took a deep breath and readied myself for an awkward conversation.

"Prince Caspian?" I approached him slowly.

He didn't even look up, "Yes your highness?"

Ouch. He wouldn't even say my name.

Still, I didn't let him scare me away. Closing my eyes, I just got straight to the point. "I would like to apologize to you."

I couldn't see his reaction, obviously, but I recognized his silence to be one of surprise.

Well, that was a good sign. He wasn't sending me away or giving a sly retort in return. Grateful, I took my opportunity to just speak quickly, "I-know-that-I-overreacted-but-I'm-just-so-angry-all-the-time-and-that-doesn't-make-it-right-and-I-shouldn't-take-it-out-on-my-friends-but-nobody's-perfect-and-so-I'm-just-really-sorry-and-yeah."

"P-Pardon?"

I reddened, "Oh please don't make me say it again!"

"Can you at least open your eyes?" His voice was calm and I found no trace of malice in it, so I did as he asked. I was a bit startled to see that a light smile tugged on his lips... Are all Telmarines so strange?

"I am sorry too." Caspian bowed his head slightly, "I said some ill things as well."

"Ah, but I provoked you." I pointed out. "Look, I... I just freaked out and went on the defensive when I realized you have feelings for Susan. But... She's taken, and I'm sorry, but I worked too long and hard to see the relationship break apart. For the years that I knew Susan and Vicern, it was always my goal to finally be together. And now that they have a second chance, I'm not going to see someone else ruin it. Ugh, I sound rude again don't I?" I pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration, "Forgive me... I just don't know how I can say that without sounding like a brat."

"I do not have feelings for your sister," Caspian mumbled, suddenly sounding very uncomfortable. "I only find her very... attractive."

"My sister?" I tilted my head in confusion, "You know nothing of my sister."

"Your sister... Susan?" Caspian stared at me for two seconds, then grinned. "Did you not know? Most Narnians view you as a the siblings of the Kings and Queens since history has treated you as the wife of King Peter."

I whistled lowly, "That would explain the wedding ring in the portrait."

"Yes," Caspian paused. "I suggest you marry the High King officially as soon as possible."

I gaped at him.

The Prince sighed and returned to readying the horses. He worked as he spoke, not looking at me. "Duke... He understands that you and Peter are in love, but as long as there is no ring on your finger, he believes he has the right to seek your hand. Do not forget his feelings for you."

"I... I didn't ask for those feelings," I hung my head in shame. "He was my friend, even when I didn't realize it. Before Narnia, I didn't like him, not in the very least! But after my dreams and visions of my life in that world, I realized how much importance he had. And so when I went back... Well, he mistook my affection for that of the romantic kind... You call me a whore... And perhaps you are right, maybe I am. But I did not choose to be one."

"Because you have four men in love with you?" Caspian chuckled.

I crossed my arms, "Oi! That's a lie, there is not four!"

"King Vicern-"

"That doesn't count." I complained.

"Fine," Caspian agreed. "Two Kings and a Duke."

"Edmund is not in love with me." I replied softly, "We have sorted it out. The day I died was the day he began to let that go... We are the closest friends now, he is my best friend and brother. As for Peter, well, my heart belonged to him over 1300 years ago by your count. So I never gave Duke my love... For I didn't even have a heart to give."

Neither of said anything after that, I think we were both lost in our own personal reflections.

I wasn't a whore... I couldn't be, I hadn't meant for any of this to happen. I was me and valued friendship, not dramatic love webs. Ugh, why did God or Aslan or whoever was in charge have to complicate my life? Everything had been so much simpler and easier. No magic, beasts, talking animals, or any of this nonsense!

Whoa, stop.

Stop right there Kay- you can't change the past, so cut out the complaining.

"You're angry."

My head snapped up and the haze in my eyes vanished. "Sorry?"

"Your face, it's all tight." Caspian explained bluntly.

"Oh." I waved my hand casually, "I'm not angry."

"Then why that expression?"

"Just... remembering life when Narnia didn't exist." I said honestly.

Caspian raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.

Then I remembered the sketch I had promised, mumbled a quick goodbye, and ran to find some parchment and ink. I sat in the middle of the great hall, just working on the sketch. There was no such thing as a number 2 pencil and eraser, so I had to crumple up the paper several times and start anew. I was hardly an artist, I could barely draw stick figures for heaven's sake! But I managed to make an outline of a boulder of a distinct shape and size, I even remembered some marks on it that would help Caspian and Susan.

Satisfied with my eighth attempt, I even added a few trees that I remembered and then gave up. With my skills (hah! what skills?) this was as good as it was going to get. Standing, I was taken aback to see Caspian and Susan enter the hall themselves. They were leading two horses and were dressed for travel- I had finished in the nick of time. Approaching them, I made sure to make eye contact with Susan and not Caspian. I was still a bit freaked out by the whole heart-to-heart we had just had. He was better friends with Duke than with me.

"Here." I held out the parchment.

Susan glanced at it and laughed- quietly. She was still very upset over the news of Vicern. "I see your art skills haven't improved."

"Leave me alone." I mumbled.

"Wow... You're crap." Duke noted, walking right past me without a pause.

I stared after him. "D-Did he just... Jeez."

Susan mounted her horse, with grace that I would never have. "We will return. Is there anything you would like me to tell... him?"

"Tell him that I think that little girl is my new best friend." Then I paused and thought, "Oh! And tell that snobby lady elf to get a tan."

She gave me a funny look.

"Uhh, he'll understand."

Giving her horse a little kick, Susan waved and disappeared through the Howe's exit. I turned expecting to find Caspian on his own horse, but nearly jumped when I saw his face coming towards mine. But I calmed down a bit when he put his mouth to my ear, "You are not a whore... Never let anyone make you think so."

And with that, he got onto his horse and rode after the Queen.