Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.

A/N: Just to let you know, Bella paid Gerard to leave in secret…No one but Bella knows why Gerard left. And also, Bella didn't take the money back from Gerard because she thought that Gerard only didn't want to go because he wouldn't have anyone to use for pleasure. And also, Bella paid him, believing that he and Alice were never in love, only lust.

Chapter 17

BPOV

I watched with my old eyes as Alice trudged back into her house. Her shoulders were hunched forward, and she had no intention of covering herself from the rain. With her fragile white hands, Alice opened the door and entered her home. Even through the pounding rain I could hear the faint smack of her body hitting the floor.

"I don't love you like I loved you yesterday."

My world tilted.

Good God, what had I done?

I jumped out of the car and ran. Ran to get somewhere, but I was going nowhere. I didn't care if a human saw me. I didn't really give a damn. I had just killed my daughter's heart.

---x------X-----x---

My legs pumped underneath me, eating the ground faster than any sports car could. The trees rushed past me. The wind pushed my hair back, making it pull at my skull. I pushed myself fast and faster, trying to get to the airport before my thoughts would make me turn around. It was taking twice as long because I couldn't run near the highway; the humans would have seen me. I could faintly make out the sound of airplanes lifting off and landing. I needed to get there. I needed to.

---x------X-----x---

I entered through the sliding doors. The cold breeze of air conditioning hit me and the foul stench of unwashed and sweaty humans almost made me turn around and leave. But I couldn't leave. I marched up to an American Airlines desk. The person sitting at it did a double take. He shuffled his papers and pulled at the collar of his uniform. He smiled at me warmly. I almost rolled my eyes.

"Is there a Gerard Reynolds getting on any of your flights?" I demanded.

The man coughed and typed away at the computer. He blinked and adjusted his nerd sized glasses. "Well, ma'am, his flight is taking off right now."

"Damn it! Could you tell me where that plane is going?"

"I'm sorry, Miss. We're not allowed to let that type of information out."

This man wasn't going to give me anything if I played nicely. I leaned over his desk, making sure that my cleavage showed some. "Are you sure about that? I would be so disappointed if you couldn't tell me."
The man swallowed. I almost smirked. I had him right where I wanted him. He stared for a few seconds. He cleared his throat.

"I'm sorry, Miss. I said I'm not allowed. Could I have the next person!?" He called.

I hissed at him but got up and left, pulling the collar of my shirt all the way up.

It was raining even harder now. My wet hair dripped down my back. Many a curious stranger stared at my soaked through shirt. I didn't feel like running back home, so I hailed a cab. The cabbie was the old grandfatherly type. He looked like Charlie.

I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply. I missed Charlie. I missed his quiet manner, the sound of him clomping around in the morning. I never saw him after I turned into a vampire. According to him and my mom, I had filed for a divorce with Jacob, but disappeared before the divorce was final. They never found my body.

I asked the cabby to stop a mile away from my house. I paid him his money, with an extra hundred dollars because I liked the man. I would have brought him home with me if I could. The cabby smiled at me and patted my cold hand.

"Take care," He said. His salt and pepper mustache quivered.

I ran out before I would start crying. This man had Charlie written all over his face.

I walked into my house feeling like a murderer.

"Bella!" Edward cried as he ran to me. He kissed me on the mouth. "Were have you been?"

I made my eyes wide and innocent. "Alice told me Gerard left. I wanted to catch him at the airport before he left."

Edward looked at me for a few seconds. "Yeah, I had a feeling Gerard was leaving. Alice was thinking about him all day. I'm glad you cared enough to look for him. By the way you look; I don't think you found him."

I nodded. "I didn't want him to leave…Alice liked him too much."

Liar.

I floated around the house, doing miscellaneous chores. I scrubbed the showers, made the beds, and pulled the weeds. My hands hovered near the phone; I was tempted to call Alice. She probably didn't want to talk to me. Like I didn't want to talk to any of my friends when Edward left.

Oh God. Oh God. Oh God.

My room started to spin.

What did I do? What did I do?

I leaned against the wall and slumped, waiting for the blackness to hit me, waiting for the peace from reality. But I was a vampire. I couldn't sleep. I couldn't close my eyes and escape to a world that was mine. I just couldn't.

Okay, I just noticed how short that chapter was…It wasn't even a thousand words. But this just sums up what Bella's feeling…I don't know, I feel kinda bad for her…Yeah I know she's horrible, but can't you just feel compassion for her? She screwed her kid's life up and now she doesn't know what to do; she doesn't know what's going to happen next.

I mean, Bella's really falling apart. She's lying to Edward. That's something big for her. And Edward believed her. So now she feels even worse. Basically, Bella is feeling like a big screw up. Come on, don't you feel sorry for her?

I'm not saying you have to feel sorry for her. I'm just pointing out what it pitiable. You can still think she's a cold hearted evil mom. But really, Bella means good. She just wants the best for Alice, and she thought that Gerard wasn't the best. So she wanted him to leave, but she couldn't let anyone know that she (vampire and mom wise) was in Ithaca. So, yeah…

Oh yeah! Also, check out my profile...I have some cool links on it...I just noticed that my author's note is ridiculously long…I should be studying…Peace.

Melissa (lovess you)