A/N: Hi you all!

I'm sorry there wasn't a chapter last week. Insanely busy weekend for me!

But, because I woke up to a text that school was cancelled, here I am with a new chapter.

This isn't the surfing chapter yet, but it's coming up. Look for it next week.

I mention a bunch of music in this chapter so do you guys still want a Beautifully Broken playlist? All the listening would be free so yay for free music!

As always, look at the visuals and REVIEW!

Love you guys.

xx, S

"Alright, take ten and we'll review the last set." I yell over to my busy crew. Everybody walks off or outside for a cigarette as I head over to the monitor where all the photos I'm taking are being projected.

"How they looking?" Lizzy, a.k.a Lana Del Rey's, approaches and looks through the pictures with me.

"Pretty good so far. What do you think?"

"I think they're almost as amazing as you." She blows me a kiss and walks off to refill her coffee.

Lizzy and I first met backstage at one of our LA shows when I was still touring with Matty. Matty and Lizzy knew each other from playing the same festivals and hanging out at award shows so she came to the show and her and I started talking. From there, Lizzy asked if I would be interested in shooting her and from then on I have done all of her album covers and album art.

After flipping through the whole set, I see they're all solid shots so I decide to call it a day.

"Hey guys, all of them great and we have a substantial amount to work with. We're done for the day and thanks for all your work. Have a wonderful rest of the weekend." I say into the earpiece radio that we all have. I head over to grab my stuff but am stopped by a delivery man carrying a bouquet of purple flowers with a yellow center. "Are you Isabella Swan?" he asks. I say yes and he hands the bouquet over to me after I sign for them. The little greeting card is peeking out of the bunch of flowers and I grab it curiously, wondering who sent these.

Bella,

I'm sorry I didn't have a chance to say goodbye to you when I wrapped, but I'll be seeing you soon at the wrap party… Enjoy these Asters; I thought of you when I saw them.

-Jane

Well. That was odd.

Her note was sweet, but it was totally a weird gesture to send me flowers just because we didn't say goodbye when it's obvious we do not like each other. I have to dismiss my questioning for now, though, because I am in an absolute rush.

I rapidly throw my bag over my shoulder, grab the flowers, and stick on my sunglasses as my assistants start to pack up my gear.

"Is it ok if I skip out and leave you guys with this? I have a place I need to be and am worried about traffic." I ask my trusted crew as they dismantle lights and shut down monitors. They all tell me to go and enjoy my weekend enthusiastically and I plant a kiss on Lizzy's cheek before practically sprinting to my car.

You can classify Edward's arms as my urgent place I need to be, right?

I left Edward's Thursday night and he and I both slept terribly in absence of each other. The bed wasn't sunken in from his body, the sheets were cold, and his scent didn't overcome the room. I felt detached. We reunited early the next morning on set and it was like we hadn't seen each other in years when it was really 12 hours. Jane and Lauren had the day off, so the day flew by peacefully before Edward and I cooked dinner back at his place and ate together. It pained me, but I knew I couldn't stay the night with him last night because Jake would start to notice my frequent absence and get suspicious. It was like dragging a kid away from the playground, but I eventually left reluctantly and returned home last night. My sleep without him was like the night before's: disturbed and pretty much nonexistent.

This morning, I got up at 6 for this shoot and I was now speeding towards his house to reunite with him. Throughout the whole shoot I was getting weepy texts from Edward telling me to hurry up and come home; he even sent a pouty selfie of him in his bed alone. The stares I got when I gasped at the photo was humiliating. He had his messy hair, light stubble, and toned chest with the covers covering only below his stomach. The guy had just woken up but looked as though he was in a photoshoot. He's inhuman for looking that good in the early morning.

I finally reach the gate to Edward's place and zip up the driveway. He must have heard the familiar sound of my engine because when I get out of the car I see him walk out of the door and light up when he sees me. Thankfully, he still has no shirt on, and is standing in the door with his arms wide open and a smile. I forget my bags and run into his arms like one of those cheesy rom-coms.

"Hi Beautiful." He says into my hair as his head rests on mine. His sticks his finger under my chin and lifts my face to pull me into a passionate kiss. I tell him how much I've missed him with my lips as he does the same.

"God we're ridiculous." I mumble against his lips about the fact that it's been only 12 hours since I last saw him.

"And I wouldn't change a thing." He says back, kissing me quickly before I head back to turn off the music coming out of my car and grab my stuff.

"Who sent you flowers?" He stares at Jane's flowers in my hand as he waits for me by the door.

"Jane, actually." I say, still unsure of how to think of the gesture.

"Why would she send you flowers when she knows you don't like each other?"

"I asked myself the same thing." I was just as confused as he was.

He plucks the card she wrote me from the bouquet and reads it with a puzzled expression.

"Weird. Why Aster flowers?"

"Who the hell knows. They're pretty, though." I throw my stuff down at the door and hop up on his kitchen counter.

"How was the photoshoot?" He opens my legs so he can stand in between them.

"Good, it was great seeing Lizzy again and she loved the photos." I trace my finger along his scruffy jaw.

Edward plants a kiss on me and I moan into his mouth, enamored by his touch.

"Should I be embarrassed that I've been watching youtube videos on surfing this whole morning in preparation for tomorrow?" He asks adorably.

"No," I place a kiss on his chin. "It's not, and as a matter of fact I was thinking we could pick up lunch and head to my favorite place for surf gear. It's totally under the radar and the owner is a old man who's friend of mine so there won't be speculation." I ask, looking into his smiling eyes.

"Sounds perfect. I'm going to throw on some clothes so I don't look ridiculous standing next to you in that outfit and I'll be ready in a second."

He kisses me deeply once again and grabs my ass before escaping into his bedroom while I grab my purse.

"Come pick our weapon," he says once he comes out of his room, oozing of sex with a tight grey tshirt, jeans, and a beanie hanging off his head. The jeans showed off his ass, the shirt pressed against his muscles, and the beanie pulled his hair back showing off his incredible facial structure. To be honest, we looked pretty killer together with him wearing that and me wearing a flowy white tshirt with high-waisted denim cutoffs and a brown fedora.

I also admit that I seriously considered calling the paparazzi and throwing him to them wearing a sign that says "PROPERTY OF BELLA SWAN" just so everyone will know that he belongs to me.

Edward grabs my hand and leads me to a door that brings us to a room that makes my jaw hit the floor.

There was a whole underground wing of his house that I had no clue existed. His garage was entirely black and white marble containing the hottest cars and bikes I had seen in my whole life.

"Holy shit." I gasp, gaping at the cars with the overhead lights making them look like pieces of gold.

"Some call it an obsession, I call it a hobby." Edward says as he goes and leans against the hood of his navy Lamborghini, looking effortlessly like he's in one of those sexy, brooding cologne commercials. "Make your pick." He says heading over to where he stores the keys to all his cars; I wander around before settling on his silver Ferrari convertible. It was a gorgeous day and the road we're taking is along the beach so a convertible was necessary. The engine comes to life when Edwards ignites it making a loud hum and we speed out of the garage as I give him instructions of where to go.

We blast a mix of chillwave artists like Odesza, Ryan Hemsworth, Tycho, and Bonobo as we cruise down the coast parallel to the surfers and children splashing in the ocean. With the ambient beats enveloping us and his hand on my thigh, I experienced true bliss for the first time. We weaved in and out of the lanes, the wind whipping through my hair as the ocean air coated it with the salty-air smell that so distinctly reminds me of my childhoods spent at the beach. Since I was a baby, I chose to spend every free moment with the ocean. I saw the ocean as a motherly power, one that I can spend hours with and never feel lonely. Australian people, especially surfers, worship the ocean as a god and treat it as one as well. We have a deep respect for the ocean and we see it as an honor to surf in it.

"I'm pretty sure I was mental when I was a kid because I used to run down my porch to the ocean whenever I was sad and unload to it. I told it about my day, the boy who had just broken my heart, the fight I had gotten in with Rose, I really told the ocean everything. " I say to Edward during our conversation as we continue down the beachside highway.

"You weren't mental, everyone needs their outlets and there's nothing wrong with having a connection with the ocean. It was your safe place so it makes sense that you confided in it." He looks at me briefly before his eyes return to the road ahead of him. He didn't even look real with the beanie on his head and the wind blowing in the little pieces of hair that escaped from his hat. He had his sunglasses resting on his nose and hand gripping the wheel while the other was caressing my thigh.

"Everybody used to call me a disappearing act in high school because I always left campus during my free periods or lunch to surf but would then show back up right on time for the next period. I used to go alone and just spend time with the ocean and my surfboard. I forget about everything when I surf, it was my escape from the chaos of high school and it was the only committed relationship I really had back then."

"You sound exactly like me in high school with soccer. We would've gotten along really well." Edward remarks with a smirk.

We continue talking about surfing, soccer, and our dreams until we're pulling up to Hoapili, my most trusted surf shop in LA. The man who owns it grew up on Kauai and we bonded instantly because he is a true surfer; he isn't like the random LA people who surf to look cool, he sees the opportunity to surf in the ocean as a privilege and he really gets the true meaning behind surfing.

"Bella, E komo mai!" Kalei, the old man who runs the shop, says once I walk in the little surf shack with Edward. His name, which meant happiness, truly suited him because he never was without a jolly smile on his face. Kalei was probably 75 so it was obvious that Edward and I didn't have to worry about him leaking that he and I were out together. To be honest, I'm sure that he has no clue who Edward is.

"Aloha, Kalei." I say, giving him a hug in return. I introduce him to Edward and brief him on what we're looking for. After he and I walk around picking out equipment and the best wetsuit, I stuff Edward in the dressing room in the back and hand him stuff to try on.

"I feel like a fucking sausage." Edward yells from behind the curtain.

"Oh, come on, I bet you look hot!" I shout back

"I am being hugged in so many places that I didn't even know possible." Right then, Edward rips back the curtain and my jaw hits the floor. The tight wetsuit grabbed every muscle of his and with his usual sexy beach hair, he looked straight out every girl's wet dream.

"Oh my god" I say, taking a step back and taking all of Edward in.

"Is that a good oh-my-god or a bad oh-my-god?" Edward says looking at me with worry

"A very good oh-my-god." I reply, smiling like an idiot at the fact I got Edward to buy a wetsuit and start surfing.

"Come on, strike a pose." I whip out my phone.

Edward situates himself between the door of the dressing room and pushes his hand on the top corner of the door frame, leaning seductively. His other hand is on his hip and his hips are popped out dramatically as he gives me the best stereotypical, obnoxious male model pose.

"Oh, yes, work it." I exclaim, snapping pics of him posing like Zoolander.

I open up the pictures and we laugh hysterically at how they turned out. Edward was purposely posing like a male model on his first photoshoot and was making a ridiculous cheeks sucked in, pouty-kissy face.

"I don't give a shit what you say, this is going on your Instagram." I say, quickly opening up the app in case he starts to argue.

"I would normally protest, but it's too fucking good to not be seen by millions."

While I edit the photo, he changes back into his clothes and we head to pay for our stuff.

"Caption?" I ask while we're checking out.

"Hmmmm….. A Zoolander quote?"

I think through the movie before I remember the most perfect quote.

"Do you think there's more than life than being really, really, ridiculously good looking?"

"Perfect. Done." Edward says in approval.

I type in the caption and hit post, throwing my phone back in my purse and grabbing our bags of surf apparel and gear.

"Lunch?" Edward asks while he reverses out of the parking lot.

"Yes, please, there's a great place about a mile away."

I lead him to one of my favorite place for food, Café Gratitude, but I ask him to pull over two blocks away from the street it's on.

"Everything ok?" Edward asks

"Yes, but it's definitely a trendy place so it wouldn't be safe for us to pull up together. I'll get out and walk and you take the car and park as normal so we'll walk in separately.

"I'm sorry we have to do this." Edward says sullenly after a few moments.

"It's ok, really, it is what it is and if this is what we have to do to be together, then so be it."

Edward smiles and kisses me passionately. I grab my purse and head down the block while Edward passes me and parks by the entrance. I enter the café and I see Edward reading the menu. Immediately, it is obvious that we were right about our decision because there's a couple in the corner staring, a group of high school girls "taking a selfie" when it's obvious they're just trying to get a picture of Edward, and the waiters are all huddled together whispering and looking while the rest of the customers are doing the same.

I slip past the group of high school girls squealing and whispering and place my order. I step to the side and Edward does the same while I casually play around on my phone while I wait. It was truly odd to have to act this way around somebody that I'm with. Before, I had the privilege of leaving the house whenever I wanted with my boyfriend and it never crossed my mind that I would someday have to have a three step plan to get lunch without being on the front page of a magazine.

Edward grabs his lunch, heads out of the restaurant, and zips off, rounding the corner. Afterwards, I grab my stuff and head down the block to find Edward in the same place he was before. I take a look round to make sure no photographers are hiding in the bushes or undercover and slip into the car before we speed away.

"We did it." Edward and I high five and put the music back on before we cruise back home.

EPOV

"I'll be back in an hour and a half." She didn't respond so I head over to the table by the window where Bella's work is spread across while she has her headphones on, concentrating on a photo she's editing.

When we got home from surf shopping, we had sex once again and laid in bed before we had to face our responsibilities. I have the field reserved tonight so I am heading over to play for an hour and Bella has to turn in these Lana photos to Nylon so she had to edit. I lift one of her headphones off her ear and tell her I'm leaving once again.

"By the way, 750k likes in 4 hours, Derek Zoolander." I laugh at the ridiculousness of it all and she kisses me deeply before I depart with a kiss on her nose.

When I slip in the car, my phone goes off and I see it's from the person I expected it to be from.

Will be there in an hour. Usual meeting spot?

Yes. See you then.

A pang of guilt stings me when I think about Bella; in theory, I wasn't lying, I just wasn't including all the information. I would tell her someday, I'm just not ready yet. In all honesty, though, I don't know if I ever will be ready.

Brace yourself, I'll take you on a trip down memory lane
This is not a rap on how I'm slinging crack or move cocaine

Kendrick Lamar echoes around the field as my soccer playlist continues on. Sweat is flying off of me as I sprint down the field, chasing the ball. I step over, scissor, and drag swerve the ball down the field, escaping the imaginary defenders on the field. I see the goal in the distance and pick up my speed even more so you couldn't see my legs because they were moving so fast. I lunge my left foot in front as a swing my right foot back and slam into the ball, making it soar into the goal at the top right corner. Hell yeah.

I slow my pace and place my hands on my knees, trying to catch the little breath I have from sprinting up and down the field multiple times.

Just as the chorus of m.A.A.d City is about to come up again, the music cuts off abruptly.

He's here.

The familiar bald head and all black attire of Felix emerges from the corner of the field as I begin my jog over to him.

"Evening, Felix," I say as I shake his hand. Even his handshake is intimidating.

His emotionless, stone expression stays the same while he pulls out a file for me as usual.

Every time, anxiety rips through my veins in anticipation.

"She has a recital coming up. Grades came in and she's doing well. Won the spelling bee, too." I flip through the pages of her reports that say she contributes intently in class and has shown excellence in the arts. The little photo of her in the corner of the page with a toothless, cheeky smile stares me in the eyes. I close the file abruptly, not wanting to revisit that place in my mind again. Shut it down, Edward. Not now.

I get traumatized by these files I get every three months, yet I still request them. I feel it's my duty and I deserve every ounce of pain I feel. I'm a monster.

"And her father?" I ask in an emotionless tone.

"Same as usual. Gets her ready for school, goes to work, picks her up at school, plays with her on weekends. Perfect dad if you ask me."

No, it's not the same of usual. It will never be normal ever again because of me.

"Thank you, Felix." I stuff the file in my gym bag and shake his hand.

"See you in December. Three months, correct?" He asks, his same serious self.

"Yes. See you then." I shake his hand and walk over to the audio system to disconnect my iPhone. I slump on the bench on the sidelines and chug down a water bottle, hanging my head low.

I had to tell Bella, but how? I bet she'll see me as the monster I am and run right out of my life.

I wouldn't put it past her.

Burying the file under my pile of gym clothes and soccer equipment, I shut off the stadium lights before slipping into my car to return home to Bella.

All I can do right now is figure out a way to tell her about my past and pray that she'll understand when I tell her.

DUN DUN DUN!

What did Edward do?

You'll have to keep reading to figure out, my loves ;)

xx, S