So this is Team Threes bonding.
Orochimaru, Naruto, Itachi, Neji and Lee… And things go wrong… So horribly wrong XD
Enjoy.

To say that Orochimaru felt left out was probably an understatement.
Normally being alone with minimal companions was something he was used to, what with abandoning his village and his only two 'friends' being a homicidal teenager and a prematurely graying, half-blind medic.
At the moment though, it was safe to say he was COMPLETELY out of his comfort zone.
He glumly watched the rest of his new team from the woods as he picked up firewood.
Sounds of giggling and enthusiastic cries of joy erupted from the clearing frequently, every time they did making Orochimaru want to pound his head against a tree.
He was all for Operation: Kill Tobi but come on…
Even reliving his defeat at the hands of Itachi wasn't as depressing as this.

Originally he had been ecstatic when he found out he was on a team with both Naruto Uzumaki AND Itachi Uchiha.
Even having a Byakugan prodigy was exciting.
He had hopes of extracting some of the Kyuubis chakra for his various experiments and was enjoying Itachis company for obvious reasons.
Perhaps he could throw away his ambitions of grooming Sasuke to be his new body.
Sasuke was just a watered down version of his brother after all.
But instead of everything being exciting and fun as he has expected, he almost felt like a fifth wheel.
And it had been like this since they had left the original meeting place.

Naruto and Itachi had wandered off ahead of the team on their own, whispering and giggling into each others ears while the Uchiha fended off the playful boy with noogies and smiles.
Orochimaru had narrowed his eyes at the pair.
He didn't like the way they constantly turned to look at him before chuckling and resuming their whispering like they shared a secret about him..
The other two weren't much better.
The one in green, Lee, had been badgering Neji nonstop since they left about stupid little things.
Who seriously wants to walk the rest of the way to their destination on their hands?
If he was to be completely honest, Lee was the one he hated the most…
Not much had changed since they settled down for the night.

Itachi and Naruto were still giggling – although this had stopped briefly when they each discovered they were out of ramen and dangos.
The only noticeable change with the other two was that the Byakugan user – Neji, was gritting his teeth with an obvious vein pulsing in his head.
Orochimaru sympathized with him.
Rock Lee was most definitely a nutcase and to be honest, he was irritating Orochimaru more than Itachi and Naruto's little exchanges.
There had to be a way to shut him up.
A metaphorical light bulb switched on above the sennins head and a sinister grin overcame his face when he realized that he had the cure for this annoyance all along.

Itachi smiled at his friend as the boy wiped a tear from his eye.
He almost felt bad for not bringing Naruto more ramen than he had, although how he could possibly have carried more without attracting attention was beyond him.
He had already gotten suspicious looks from Pein about his over packed bag and the sloshing noise it made when he walked.
Oh well. He had made the boy happy temporarily.

"Why is the ramen gone-dattebayo…?"

Itachi ruffled his hair with a soft smile and glanced into the woods as Orochimaru emerged with an armful of firewood.
Something about the Sennin's smug face made Itachi slightly nervous.
He had a look that said 'I know something you don't and shit is about to go doooooown!'.
The Uchiha watched stoically as Orochimaru dropped the logs next to the fire and pulled a strange little vial from his robe.
He turned away before Itachi could see anymore and he narrowed his eyes at the man's turned back, making a mental note to keep a very close eye on him.
Why he was paired with Naruto, Neji AND Orochimaru in the first place was beyond him.
I mean, the creeper was dedicating his life to making himself immortal and acquiring every jutsu in existence.
So how about we team him up with a jinchurikki, a Byakugan user and a Sharingan wielder?
Itachi could almost feel the face palms of all Orochimaru's dead test subjects.
He himself was tempted to murmur profanities under his breath at the Hokage and Pein.
But he was an Uchiha… And Uchiha's don't curse.
…Much…

Itachi vaguely noticed that Naruto had become very silent and glanced at the boy curiously.
The boy's eyebrows were furrowed and he was watching Orochimaru quietly, seemingly as interested in the man's movements as he was.
Itachi turned his gaze back to Orochimaru who at this point in time was handing Rock Lee a cup with a strange green liquid inside.
Before Itachi could make a move to stop him or even cry out a warning, Lee had gulped it down.
Time stood still and a silence descended as everyone in the clearing looked at him in shock.
Neji was gaping at his team mate, seemingly unable to comprehend the stupidity of drinking something offered to him by a missing nin.
Naruto was gritting his teeth and looking very much like he was about to strangle said perpetrator.

"Orochimaru…"

The Sennin turned to look at the Uchiha with a triumphant smile on his face.
He grinned and replied, "Yeeeeees?"
Itachi narrowed his eyes and glared.

"What did he just drink?"

Feigning innocence, Orochimaru began to play the 'I don't know what you are talking about' card.
Before he could begin, he was surrounded by three very angry ninja.
Rock Lee seemed oblivious to the scene around him and sat in front of the fire, blinking into it.
Itachi grabbed the man by the shirt and pulled him closer, his Mangekyou Sharingan whirling threateningly.
Orochimaru couldn't help but gulp at the glare he was being given.
Waving his hands back and forth in front of his face, he cried,

"Okay okay! I just spiked his drink with a relaxant. His constant speeches on youth and random jabbering were annoying me. "

Itachi relaxed his grip slightly and glanced at the drugged ninja.
He certainly did seem to have toned down a little.
Releasing his hold, he sent the Sennin one last glare and returned to his seat across from the fire.
Being set free from Itachi's dark presence made him feel a little easier.
Neji sighed and discreetly smiled to Orochimaru, inwardly screaming with joy.
It's not every day that Rock Lee calms down enough to be deemed a normal person.
Naruto growled irritably and followed Itachi, slumping down beside him and watching Lee carefully.
Orochimaru smiled at them,

"I haven't brought anything on this mission that could endanger us and nor do I plan to. I was originally going to try and slip that drug to Tobi to relax him enough to be taken captive but I figured this was a better use for it. Other things I brought along include energy boosting formulas and chakra enhancing medicine. I have a special one that does both at once. They will be useful for future battles."

Itachi nodded his understanding from across the clearing, still not particularly liking the idea of Orochimaru supplying them with drugs.
Neji seemed torn between his thoughts, on one hand he looked like he wanted to hug the Sennin for his actions but on the other, was finding it difficult to trust him as well.

From beside the fire, Rock Lee stood up and flexed his muscles.
A very creepy, very manic grin spread across his face as he glanced around at everyone silently.
Itachi raised an eyebrow and Orochimaru tilted his head.
With an almighty scream, Lee jumped into the air, shooting for the sky and achieving a height about 3 times that he usually would.
Naruto gasped and shielded his eyes from the light of the full moon as he watched Lee's rise and descent.
He whizzed back to earth at a tremendous speed.
As soon as he touched the ground, Lee disappeared in a flurry of leaves, a blur of green bouncing off the trees and ground, circling the team.
Orochimaru furrowed his brows and pulled out the vial that he had spiked Lee's drink with.
One glance at the label and he began to chuckle very hesitantly.
All eyes turned to him as he sheepishly turned the bottle around, exposing the name tag on the side.

Chakra and energy enhancing formula.

For the second time that evening, all presents mouth dropped open in disbelief.
Orochimaru sighed and pulled another bottle from his robe, this one reading Relaxant drug.

"Sorry everyone… That really was a mistake… They are the same color…"

Itachi gave into temptation and face palmed… groaning violently.
Naruto patted his back comfortingly while Neji dropped to his knees and began to sob.
The speed that Lee was travelling was intense and soon the fire was blown out.
In what was probably his most tactful move to ever be used, Naruto, while still sitting down, timed his aim carefully.
Drawing back his arm, he punched Rock Lee right in the stomach, not succeeding in slowing him down, but forcing him into the next little clearing, giving them all space.

"How long does it last?"

Orochimaru paused in his preparation to cheer for Naruto and glanced at Itachi fearfully.
All eyes turned to him as he placed the vials back into his robe.
Gulping, he sheepishly replied, "About 3 hours…"
Simultaneous groans echoed throughout the camp.
Of course this would happen…
A violent gust of wind blew that had nothing to do with Lee, followed by a repetitive swishing noise.
Naruto looked up to the sky.
At what he saw, he jumped to his feet and pointed,

"Aghh! What is that dattebayo!?"

Itachi looked to the heavens, his impaired eyesight taking him a second to confimr what he was seeing. Once his vision was focused, Sharingan red eyes widened and he cried out in horror.
Oh no…
Oh hell no…

Cliffy mwahahaha.

I know you love cliff hangers.
The next chapter should be out soon though.
I haven't began to write it yet because I have been screwing around trying to write Hidan, Sakura, Konan, Iruka and Shikamarus team bonding… Which is going lovely by the way (insert snickering here)
Tenten, Kiba, Pein, Kakuzu and Kabutos team bonding will come out before that team though because:
A) that's the order I wrote the teams in
B) they are actually really difficult to write (because you can do soooo much with Hidan and Iruka its not funny)
And C) because I think that's the chapter a few people are hanging out for so I want to do it well.
Anyway, rates, reviews, complaints and excuses will be heard after the loud, irritating, mechanical, high tone produced as an alert signal…
Or just 'beep' for short