It was a peaceful and normal day in Summoner's Rift.
You can't get more blatant than that.
Katarina was running as fast as she could. Nevermind, she was running faster. Actually, she was running faster than possible. You could say that she was running so fast, Mother Nature wanted her to slow down, and if she could, Katarina would have flipped her off and threw a knife for good measure.
The point was, she was running all to avoid the demonic fury behind her.
She ran past the minions, who bravely attempted to stand in the way. However, they were righteously smote with extreme prejudice.
She ran past the turret, which began charging a shot at the incoming enemy. The person didn't even notice as he ripped the turret out of the ground and threw it away without breaking stride.
Katarina ran until she came across her team, who was planning the ingenious tactic known as a massive mid lane push.
"Alright, so here's the plan. First, we gather everyone in the team. Second, we kill everything that is not our minions, ourselves, or which pisses us off with its existence. Then we win. Any questions?" Garen asked.
Varus, Nautilus, and Sion were silent. Just then, Katarina ran up to them, or more specifically, Garen.
"Garey, there's a bad person after me. Can you and the other take care of him?" Katarina asked sweetly.
"Sure, Kat. Just know we're going to push mid, alright?"
"Wouldn't miss it. Love you." Kat said as she pulled down Garen's scarf and pecked him on the lips.
Garen pulled up his scarf. "Love you too."
As Katarina ran off, the rest of the team stared at Garen. The Might of Demacia shrugged.
"Marriage counseling does wonders."
"Ah…" The rest of the team accepted this explanation, until Nautilus spoke up.
"Wait, marriage counseling?"
At that moment, HE pounced.
"Yeah, I'd like a Rabadon's Deathcap, please." Katarina told the shopkeeper yordle.
Taking out the item out of his oversized backpack, he held it out to the Sinister Blade. Katarina took out a gigantic bag of gold about the size of the shopkeeper yordle and gave it, grabbing the item in one deft motion. The yordle didn't last two seconds before the giant bag of gold squished him under its weight. Katarina ignored the yordle's plaintive complaints about his broken parts of yordle anatomy.
The reason wasn't that she was a very cruel person and delighted in others' misfortune and pain other than her own. She was more concerned about the sounds of carnage and Garen's screaming about Varus' leg bone being shoved up his urethra. Soon the sounds died down and silence reigned.
"Garen? Are you alright?"
At that moment, the Nexus was ripped from its position and thrown away, beaning Baron Nashor in the face.
Katarina fell on her butt as she beheld the subject of her nightmares for the next few days.
His axes dripped blood. His eyes were bloodshot. His lips leaked drool. His beard bristled.
It was a pissed Olaf. Katarina had to use all her mental faculties to not **** in her leather pants.
"Look, Olaf. It was an accident, I won't do it again. Justlemmegoalrightcool?"
Olaf simply pointed a bloody axe in her direction.
"You mess with the beard, now you get reared." With that, the berserker leapt towards her. Katarina screamed so shrilly, only dogs would have heard her.
Nasus would spend the next couple of days nursing a headache.
Regulation #201: Olaf's beard will not be cut without his consent.
Regulation #202: Olaf will not overreact to people accidently snipping his beard.