Part 20

Livia had never been more confused in her life. What had just happened? Had she actually…. She didn't even know what word would describe it. The way she had acted… She couldn't understand it. Why hadn't she stopped Tristan? Was she really that pathetic? Yes, she was. For so long she had suppressed the part of her that craved to be touched. She had never wanted to put herself in so vulnerable position again.

There had been men who had approached her, but she had known that none of them had really wanted her. They had been willing to do whatever they had to do in order to advance their own position. Including courting someone like her. She had no doubt that they would have been nothing but kind and polite if she would have allowed them in her bed, but deep down they would have been nothing but disgusted.

She would have been nothing more than an unpleasant task for them. As much as she had wanted to be touched, she would have never been desperate enough to be with a man like that. What about Tristan then? He had kept saying that he wanted her, but could that really be true? What if it was? She had no idea what to do.

"Livia?" Lucien's voice said after a long silence.

For a moment Livia had forgotten his presence, she gave him an apologetic smile.

"I'm sorry, I…"

"No need to apologize, I would just want to know are you alright?"

"Me? Yes… Yes, everything is fine."

Obviously he didn't believe her, his eyebrows furrowed.

"Livia… If Tristan did something to you…"

"He didn't," she cut in quickly. "We… talked."

She couldn't look at Lucien, she was afraid that he could somehow see what had happened. The thought would have made her blush, if that would have been physically possible. Did she look somehow different? Could everyone see that? Suddenly she realized something. Eli. She froze and swallowed.

"Livia? I can see that something is wrong," Lucien stated tensely. "What did Tristan do?"

"Nothing, I swear. Please… Please don't tell anyone that I met him."

Lucien didn't say anything. Finally Livia forced herself to look at him.

"I'm really sorry for putting you in this kind of position, I shouldn't have…"

"This isn't about me," he cut in firmly and sighed. "Look, Livia, you know I'm not the kind of person who usually cares about anyone, but the thing is that I happen to like you. I don't know what's going on between you and Tristan, but I can see that something is wrong. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to, that's fine, but don't expect me to just look away and forget the whole thing."

Livia stared at him, unable to reply. She could see that he was certainly out of his comfort zone. He was worried about her. She couldn't help but smile.

"Lucien… First of all, I like you too. And second of all…" She paused and reached for his hand. Both of his hands were resting on the steering wheel, she touched the right one. "Thank you."

"For what?" he murmured.

"For being my friend."

He cleared his throat before smirking.

"Well, I'm afraid I have a purely selfish reason to worry about your wellbeing, darling. Your family would kill me if anything would happen to you."

She smiled.

"Sure, you keep saying yourself that. Softie."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me."

He frowned.

"I demand you take that back."

"And what if I won't?"

He smirked.

"Do you really want to push your luck, darling?"

She crossed her arms and looked at him challengingly. He stopped the car on the side of the street and turned to look at her.

"Last chance, take that back."

She smiled and shook her head.

"I don't think so, softie."

His eyes narrowed before he moved closer to her.

"Take that back."

"No."

He grinned and pushed her seat back, pressing his palms flat on either side of her head.

"Is that supposed to scare me?" she asked.

"Yes."

She laughed and was just about to reply when he suddenly leaned closer and pressed his lips against hers. For a moment she was too stunned to react, then she thought that this was some kind of joke. What else could this be? He didn't lay a finger on her, she could have easily broken away from his lips, but he had managed to take her completely by surprise. As he covered her mouth with his, he pressed the tip of his tongue against the seam of her lips. Her mind was still refusing to work properly; she made no attempt to stop him before he pulled away and looked at her. There was a strange look in his dark eyes.

"Forgive me," he murmured and returned to his own seat.

She needed a moment before she was able to speak.

"Lucien…"

"I can smell it," he murmured tensely. "And if I can, then so can your family."

Livia stared at him.

"What… What are you talking about?"

He cleared his throat and cocked his head towards her waist. She still couldn't understand.

"I can smell certain… body fluids," he clarified.

Her eyes widened before she quickly turned her head away, wanting to hide.

"Oh lord…" she mumbled. She was more than embarrassed

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"Why… Why did you kiss me?" she asked after she was able to speak again.

"I'm not sure," he murmured. "It felt like a good idea, since your brothers will blame me for this anyway…"

"Blame you for what…" she started before she understood. "Oh…"

They were both quiet for a moment, she needed to think.

"Alright… No one is going to blame anyone for anything," she finally said. "I need a place where I can take a quick shower and if you can be so kind and find me a new pair of panties?"

Lucien turned to look at her.

"You want me to go and buy you panties?"

"I'm sorry," she sighed. "I'm sure you don't want to see me again after tonight and I completely understand…"

"Why wouldn't I want to see you again?" he cut in.

"Why would you?" she huffed. "I doubt that this has been a fun evening for you."

"Well…" he hummed smirking. "I do enjoy lingerie shopping. I think pink especially is my color."

She broke into a snigger, she couldn't help it.

"I'm sorry about the kiss," he added.

"That's alright. This has been a strange evening."

"Yes… Shall we take a room then? There's a decent looking hotel across the street."

She nodded.

"Any place is fine. Thank you, Lucien."

The evening had really been strange, but it certainly wasn't over yet. She still had to face her family.