A/N: Thank you everyone for the reviews! I am so glad you're all enjoying the story so far. To those of you who worry about me ever turning Lyna in to a cliché who decides to go after Zevran because Alistair seems uninterested, I really wouldn't worry. I couldn't stomach writing a weak minded heroine. I grew up on Buffy and am an AVID fan of Joss Whedon, who seems to have a deep and abiding love for strong women do don't take no for an answer and don't back down from a challenge, and also seems to have had a deep impact on who I am and how I write my female characters…However, both our leading lady and her beau began this journey in a very naïve place, and have a great number of lessons to learn before their story comes to an end, so you'll have to bear with me while these two crazy kids figure themselves out.

So, on to Chapter 20; when last we saw Lyna and Alistair they were a half day's journey from Redcliffe. Short chapter for expediency sake, and we are going to skip ahead to dealing with demon-Connor in Redcliffe castle briefly, before sailing right on through to the conversation between Alistair and the warden in camp immediately following that quest. I felt like Alistair gave in a backed down WAY too easy from what he was claiming was basically the murder of a child. I think he needs to stick to that conviction a bit longer.

Looking at the boy playing on the floor of the Arl's family quarters, Lyna had to wonder how the last twenty four hours have boiled down to this. They'd fought so hard just to get to the Arl's family, only to realize that had been the easy part. She felt tears prick the back of her eyes and bile begin to rise in her throat. She knew the boy was possessed and that the demon inside him was slowly massacring the knights, soldiers and towns people they had come to Redcliffe hoping to recruit, but in that moment she only saw the little boy who wanted nothing more than to save his father…and had made a deal with a demon to do so.

The scene downstairs had been devastating when Lady Isolde had revealed that her son was a mage and that she had employed an apostate to teach the boy to hide his power so that he wouldn't be taken away to live in the Circle. Said apostate had later turned out to have been hired by Loghain to poison the Arl, and it was the Arl's failing health that had enabled the demon to tear the veil in the end. "There must be another way to enter the fade," Lyna had insisted, when Jowan (the blood mage who had poisoned the Arl in the first place) suggested using blood magic to send Morrigan in to the fade to confront the demon and free the boy.

"You can find lyrium and more mages at the Circle of Magi—if they would even do it." Alistair had proposed, though he hadn't sounded particularly hopeful. And why would he? There were reasons the Dalish didn't send their young mages to the circle; the right of tranquility being the biggest, though their whole approach to magic was suspect.

"The tower is about a day's journey across the lake," Bann Teagan had included. "You could attempt to get the mage's help."

Her first thought on that plan was then quickly voiced by the Arlessa. "But what will happen here?" Lady Isolde had asked. "Connor will not remain passive forever."

"Then it is not an option," Lyna had responded. "We cannot risk the lives of the remaining villagers. We must fight the demon here." From there, the course had been set. Even if she had been willing to turn to blood magic to save the child, she was not willing to trust the mage Jowan with Morrigan's life. And if Morrigan failed, or was made to fail, then the villagers would be in danger again. So, there she stood, watching the child in what would be the last moments of his life.

She must have shifted, or sniffled or made some sort of noise because it was at that moment that the boy's eyes shot up to her. They looked so scared, so innocent.

"Go away," The boy commanded bravely as he stood up tall and brave, though his voice quaked with fear. "She won't like you being here," he continued, though his bravado quickly wilted. Her own expression changed from morose to suspicious. "She'll just try to hurt you," the boy finished numbly.

"Is this Connor?" Lyna asked suspiciously. "The real Connor?"

"I'm always me," Connor replied, though his eyes and voice were haunted. "But…sometimes the scary lady takes over." He cast his eyes down in recollection. "I feel like I'm sleeping, but I guess I'm not." Unshed tears started choking his voice. "I tried to stop her, but I can't. She said she'd help father. I didn't think she'd hurt everyone." His eyes were now brimming with tears. "Honestly, I didn't."

With her own fears that the demon might be toying with her lain to rest Lyna's eyes sunk to the floor, now unable to look Connor in the eye. "Do you know what she is, Connor?" She asked.

"She's a bad person," He replied. "I heard her in my dreams and then she was everywhere." It seemed that Jowan had failed the boy as much as Lady Isolde. He seemed not to understand that the demon had approached him in the Fade—he didn't even seem to understand that she was a demon. Jowan's attention had been focused on poisoning the Arl, and as such he had missed the real danger lurking at the end of the veil.

"I have to…stop her," Lyna attempted to explain. How did you explain to a child that he had to die? "But I don't want to hurt you. Do you understand?"

Connor nodded slowly. "Someone has to stop her from hurting anyone else."

"And I need to help your father…because I need his help too, but like you said the scary lady won't like it if I do that…there's a blight coming, and without your father's help, we could all die," She tried to explain. She knew her reasons wouldn't make a difference to him in the end; he'd be dead either way, so why was she bothering?

Because she needed to convince herself; her head knew this was the safest way—no, the only way…but her heart railed against it. He was a child! He didn't deserve to die just because some demon wanted a way on to this plain.

"You need to hurry," Connor urgently prompted. "I don't know how long she'll be gone for, but she's always watching!" The tears finally spilled past their dam and trailed down his cheeks as he spoke. "She'll just come back again and then…please don't let her hurt anyone else!"

Lyna fell to her knees before the boy and wrapped her arms around him. She had no right to comfort the boy; she didn't even know him, and she was about to kill him! But the boys arms wrapped themselves around her shoulders and hugger her back, actively seeking whatever solace they could find in the moment. "Shhh…" She cooed. "It'll be alright Connor. I promise you that she won't hurt anyone else."

Connor nodded his head against her increasingly tear soaked shoulder. "At least no one will be hurt anymore, and maybe father can be helped. That's all I wanted…" He trailed off, his voice barely above a whisper.

Lyna felt her own eyes beginning to sting from unshed tears…No! She would be strong now, she told herself. She had to be strong for the child, if not for herself. He needed to die believing that he had been strong and how could he remain strong in the face of death if she could not? "Close your eyes Connor," She instructed quietly as she gave the boy a final hug and then stood and puller her daggers from their sheaths.

It all seemed like such a blur from that point forward. She drew her arm back, prepared to plunge the dar'misu in to the child's heart and with a guttural battle cry (or was it a sob?) she plunged the knife forward…only to meet empty space. In those brief seconds, the demon had resurfaced to fight for the ground it had won. The battle was strenuous, and the demon showed no mercy, nor gave any quarter, but in the end she won out and Connor's lifeless body crumbled to the floor. From behind her she heard Isolde cry out with the gut wrenching agony that could only be understood by a mother who lost a child. Her knees gave out as she tore across the room for her boy and when she hit the floor, she scrambled frantically the rest of the way before clutching his limp body to her chest. She rocked his corpse as she begged him to breath...to live.

Lyna turned away, unable to watch the scene. She had done what was necessary, and it couldn't be undone. And if she were given the choice to do it again, she would make the same one. The demon, and therefore the boy, was a danger to all the lives in Redcliffe and could not have been left unattended. They could not risk the lives of every man woman and child in the village in the hopes that one boy could be saved. She had done what was necessary.

She didn't even remember the trek back to the inn down in the village. She assumed that the queen had demanded they leave the castle, and not even Morrigan would have begrudged the woman her desire in that moment. She now moved instinctively around the room she was sharing with Morrigan and Leliana for the night, removing her leathers, plaiting her lengthening hair, building and stoking the fire in the hearth…

Then a knock sounded on the door. At first no one answered; Lyna barely noticed as she continued to poke at the smoldering logs, Leliana's red, puffy eyes lifted to the door and then darted over to Morrigan in question, and Morrigan simply raised an eyebrow as she wrote in her grimoire as if to say "It's certainly no one looking for me." It was Leliana who finally went to answer the door, and when she did it only opened a crack and didn't open any further for a few moments as she and the visitor exchanged words in a hushed tone.

"Morrigan," Leliana finally called tersely. Morrigan's eyes darted up from the pages of her spell book. Leliana jerked her head towards the hall beyond the doorway indicating she wanted the witch to follow. Morrigan huffed with irritation as she picked herself up off the bed she had been sitting on with exaggerated effort and then glared at both Leliana and the visitor as she exited.

It was Alistair who now stood behind her, occupying the space the two women had recently vacated. His dark mood rolled off of him in waves and broke violently against her back as she continued to poke and star in to the fire. Silence stretched out between them as his eyes bore holes in her back and his fiery anger licked at the frayed edges of her nerves.

"I want to talk about what happened," He bit out abruptly. "With Connor."

A log in the hearth cracked loudly and spewed sparks into the air and across the floor at her feet as if to punctuate the rage he was barely holding back. She didn't react at all, just continued to stare absently at the hearth a moment before responding. "You were there. You know what happened."

"You killed Connor! You killed him-a little Boy! How could you do that!?" He spat.

Lyna laid down the poker and sat back from the fire, her arms hanging limply from where they rested on her knees and her head hanging in defeat. "Are you saying I should have used blood magic?" She asked quietly.

"I…I don't know, maybe!" was his incredulous reply. "It was Lady Isolde's fault, what happened at the castle!" He continued yelling. "With all that blood on her hands, maybe you should have let her sacrifice herself. This is the Arl's son we're talking about here! What do you think he'll say when we revive him?"

Lyna remained stoic, not raising her eyes to challenge him. Her heart agreed with him and she was heartbroken over what she had done, but she had made the choice and so she would suffer whatever anger and grief he wanted to throw her way. "He'll see that there were larger things at stake," She replied quietly.

"I just don't know how you could do it, how you could make that decision!" He snapped.

He wanted her to yell or fight or maybe even break down and cry. He definitely wanted to see something other than the pained and resigned certainty she knew was written all over her face, but that wasn't something she could or would do for him. Not tonight anyway. "I honestly did the best I could Alistair," she reasoned, though there was no force behind her conviction.

"Did you? I guess I really have no choice but to just accept that," he bit out. "You know what? Just forget I brought it up. I'm the one being the ass here, right? That's why you won't stand up and fight! That's why you won't try to make me understand why this was the only choice!" Lyna still refused to respond, refused to rise to his baiting. She'd done what was necessary. No amount of yelling was going to change that. "Forget it; forget I said anything at all…" he trailed off, though his anguish still boiled just below the surface. "I owe Eamon more than this," He muttered more to himself than to her.

His last quip finally struck one of her few remaining nerves. "So this is about you and him then."

"No!" He snapped before stopping to think about her words. When he did a second later, it was just enough trip up his righteous tirade. "Well…I don't know...I suppose it's done either way, isn't it?" He continued as he glared. Apparently he wasn't willing to examine that particular accusation at the moment. "I suppose it's easy to question your choices when I'm not the one making the decisions…and I've let you do just that, haven't I?" It wasn't an outright condemnation of her leadership, but it was enough to make her disengage herself from the conversation entirely.

"Then maybe it's time you stop letting me make them," She finally snapped back, having lost all her patience with his outburst.

"Maybe it is," he snapped back. And with that he stalked out of the room, slamming the door behind him.