Hi everyone, here's the new chapter! Hope you enjoy!!
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Inara let out a loud sigh as she opened her eyes and saw that it was still very dark in the shuttle. This meant that it was still night. She was so tired but she couldn't sleep anymore. She sat up in bed and noticed that Sivella was still sleeping. She put on her slippers as she stood up. Lying in bed was no use either. Maybe a walk or some calming tea would help. Then she could get back to bed and sleep for another hour before morning would come.
Inara walked through the hall as she noticed Mal who was just walking away from the kitchen.
'Mal?' Inara said surprised. She hadn't counted on walking into him.
He looked up with a confused expression on his face. His eyes stood blurry.
'Inara.' He stated just as confused as she, as he looked around as if he was expecting someone else. 'You- Couldn't sleep?'
'No, I- Yes..' Again with the stuttering. She looked away to compose herself shortly as she looked up at him with big eyes. 'Mal, I-' She paused shortly as she studied his face. 'I want to apologise for what I did earlier, I shouldn't have slapped you.' She didn't break eye contact. 'I am still angry for what you did, but I shouldn't have... I was out of control.' There, it was out. But in a weird way, she didn't feel relieved.
'Yeah well..' Mal said as he looked away and went through his hair with one hand. 'I was out of control too. So maybehaps I deserved it. Had no right in lockin' you up.' He looked back at her and she swallowed. 'I had no bussiness tryin' to control you. Even when it was meant in a good way.'
'Thankyou.' She was glad Mal could see it that way, finally. 'I-' She suddenly felt silent and got a shocked look on her face as she looked at Mal's hands.
He looked down at his hands too.
'What happened?' She uttered as she took his wrist and pulled his hand away from his stomach.
'O, 'tis nothing. Just a scratch.'
'You're bleeding.' She said shocked.
'Simon will-'
Mal looked around him, he was sitting in the medical bay as Inara rummaged through a drawer and found a clean bandage. How did he even get here? One minute he's talkin' to her and tellin' her that Simon will take care of his wound, -well he didn't really mean that, he can take care of it himself- and the next minute he's here?! It was only hours ago that he had had that dream- don't think about that! Not now, don't look at her like that! Her legs, they are so long and her- STOP! Mal looked to the other side of the room instantly.
'This will be sufficient.' Inara said as she walked with the bandage towards Mal as she concentrated on rolling it off neatly.
'Why do you still have your shirt on?' Inara questioned surprised when she noticed Mal was still fully dressed sitting on the table.
He shouldn't take off his shirt. He swallowed. Nope, no taking of his shirt. Not in front of her.
' 'Cause it's cold?' He answered dumbly.
'Take of your shirt, I can't see the wound well enough like this.' Inara said as she was so concentrated on the bandage that she didn't notice his unease.
Inara raised an eyebrow as Mal held up one side of his shirt and still didn't take it off.
'It's not like you have got something I haven't seen before Mal.' Inara said surprised. Why was he acting so difficult?
Yep, that weren't the problem. Not the problem at all. 'You'd be surprised.' Mal stated dryly causing her other eyebrow to raise slightly at that comment. 'Cause the woman must have seen... How many...? Hundreds of men naked? He could say something mean now but he chose not too.
'Just don't feel like takin' off my shirt is all.' He said as he wanted to jump of the table. He had to get away from her.
Inara got a surprised cringe between her brows as she eyed him. 'I just want to help you.' Her voice came.
It sounded so sweet, and he thought that he heard an undertone of hurt in it.
He looked at her, at those dark big eyes and sighed inwardly as he let himself be pushed back on the table by her soft touch. He swallowed as he looked away. Yeah, the woman just wanted to help, with her carin' nature an' all. That was all. He was sure of that.
'Since when did you become such a prude?' She said in a mocking way with a small smile. It wasn't so long ago that he had walked through the desert naked. It wasn't like he had been ashamed of his body then.
He took off his shirt involuntarily as she put down a scissors and placed her hand on his stomach.
Mal's breath caught in his throat sharply the moment her warm hand contacted with his skin. She looked up at him in surprise because of his reaction.
'You're hands are cold, is all.' He quickly muttered as he looked away. Just hold your breath Reynolds, an' it'll all be over very soon. Don't think 'bout her. Don't think 'bout her at all. Instead he focused on her long dark hair, the beautiful long tresses that curled around her elegant neck and shoulders. She can be so caring, he thought fondly.
'AAAAUuuuu!' He cried out in pain when she suddenly ripped off the other bandage. And then she does a thing like that! 'You could have warned me you know!' He shot at her angrily.
'Well, you could have expected that.' She said with a small smile at his reaction.
'When did this happen?' She asked worried as her finger grazed the skin softly, next to the wound.
'You'd better not do that.' Mal said as he grabbed her wrist to stop her from touching him.
'Why?' She asked surprised.
'Cause it makes me want to grab your arm and pull you towards me so I can feel you against me. 'Tickles an' all.' Mal answered shortly as he reminded himself that he would never feel her against him like that. Ever. He should give that dream up. Maybe then he wouldn't feel that tormented. Yeah sure, the woman had kissed him, shouted at him some and then had kissed him. But was that likely to ever happen again? Sure, the shoutin' part, but the other part... He studied her serene face. Probably not, courtesy to him lockin' her up an' all. But still she was helpin' him, 't wasn't like she had to. He even didn't want to! But she still did. Maybehaps 'cause she regretted hittin' him, that she was tryin' to make somethin' good.
'But when did this happen?' Inara repeated her earlier question. She noticed how silent Mal was and how he seemed deep in thought. Far away with his thoughts.
Yes, that's good. 's good to think 'bout when this happened. To think 'bout anythin' but her! 'Kind a run into a knife from one of Blake's guards.' Mal explained.
'I didn't know.' She absolutely hated it when he got hurt. When anyone was trying to hurt him. She looked at the wound, she wished that she could make it dissapear. Make all his pain dissapear. Her own thoughts shocked her. She would do a lot for him, she realised.
There a lot of things you don't know. Mal thought. 's Good thing possibly. He would have felt so ashamed if she only knew what he had dreamt hours ago. His look went to her midsection. It was so small. Just like in his dream. She had felt so warm, and just the fact that she wanted him, that had sent him over the edge totally. Yep, and then he remembered the waking up again in a cold bed, alone. And here she was, right in front of him, tormenting him with her closeness, her smell, her- everything. It didn't matter what she did. Everything she did was too much already. Just seein' her was too much right now.
'I can only find this roll of bandage.' Inara said as she got a wrinkle between her eyebrows. She couldn't find the new version of the bandage Simon used.
This wouldn't take long. She would just put the bandage on his skin and off he was. He was a busy man after all, he was a Captain! There were always a lot of things to do 'round here. So he wouldn't even need an excuse to leave instantly. Just a few more seconds... I can do that, I can... Think about how much it hurt when Niska tortured him. That was a good thing to think about right now. That really made him feel bad, and that way he could control himself! Niska cutting off his ear-
'That'll have to do.' Inara said.
Mal looked innocently from the roll of bandage in Inara's hands towards the discarded small square bandage. What did she mean? The moment she placed a gauze against his wound and wanted to step closer he quickly said something.
's Not the bandage Simon used.' Mal remarked quickly.
This made Inara stop and look at the bandage and then to him.
'I meant 's not sticky an' all.. Like Simon's bandage..' He quickly muttered.
'No, I can't find that anywhere. But this is good too. It's just so it will keep the gauze at the right place.' She said as she closed the gap between them and encircled him with her arms to roll the bandage over his back.
He held his breath, she was way too close now. This was not good. He could feel the warmth from her body against his chest. How was that even possible? The woman didn't even touch him. Must be some Companiony talent or somethin'. Or perhaps not, 's not like she would use her Companiony techniques on him. Except when she wanted somethin' ofcourse but there weren't a thing to want for her right now, was there?
O, no, and there you had it. She probably was used to it bein' with many men an' all but he didn't like it at the moment. How did this even happen? He felt his trouser strain against his crotch. He thinks of her not touching him and that makes him feel aroused too? How low can you go? He really was lost with that one around. He thought as he eyed Inara angrily. He'd always been a gentleman towards woman, polite an' all, he'd always been able to control himself but she... She threw everythin' upside down and then some more.
's Best to act like nothin' is wrong. Mal thought quickly. Maybe she hasn't noticed yet. 's not like the woman has eyes everywhere. Just wait until she is ready and then stand up and put my shirt in front of me and leave. That will be simple. Simple and plain, just like that. Then he suddenly wonders about his age, and how old he is, he's a grown man acting this way? It's because he's tired! And because of her. That's what she does, she always spins him about, whether he wants it or not. Damn woman.
He felt her put the last piece of the bandage softly behind another piece. Why did this take SO long?! Mal thought frustrated.
'I'll just wash the blood away-' Inara began.
'-No!' Mal uttered quickly as he jumped away from the table and pushed away her arm.
Her eyes grew big as she looked at him, he saw a flicker of a hurt expression in her eyes but she hid it instantly.
And there she stood, all innocent, wide-eyed, like a bambi with his bandage in her hands to help him. He felt like some sort of angry oger man again, 't was like he could do nothin' right around her.
'I'm okay, thankyou.' Mal said quickly as he held his shirt strategically in front of him.
'Mal, did I do something wrong?' Inara asked confused.
'Nothin', nothin' wrong an' all.' He eyed the room for his other shirt. There it was, next to her. Discarded on the table. He should get it.
'Could you throw me my shirt? Thankyou, then I'd best be off an' all, with it bein' the middle of the night, or morning, but late- uh- early and I need to get me some sleep.'
'I just wanted to help you.' She uttered.
He looked away. 'Don't need your help.' He said as he passed her quickly and took his shirt. That sounded more harsh then he had intended too..
She turned around to face him.
Don't look at her. Don't. She'll have that hurt expression on her face again and he just couldn't face that right now.
'What is wrong with you?'
Wrong? All sorts of things.... All sorts... He thought annoyed.
'What is it Mal? Why don't you tell me?' She suddenly said angrily as she threw down the bandage on the table next to her. She expected an insult.
'You want to know the truth? You sure 'bout that, 'cause said words can't be taken back.' Mal asked directly as he turned towards her.
'Why don't you enlighten me.' She said as she put her hands in her sides and braced herself from an attack that she was expecting to come.
'One more of those touches of yours, don't matter none what sort of touch, and I can't stop myself anymore. I Just want to push you onto that right there table and kiss you senseless.' And touch you everywhere, rip off that skimpy nightgown and- He clenched his teeth. Leaving, leaving now. But for some reason he couldn't move. He just had to see her reaction. For a large part inside of him he was afraid that she would push him away, again. As always. But still, he just had to stand there.
She stood there, stunned, just staring at him, wordless. That didn't happen many times that the woman was wordless. The ever so trained Companion wordless. He thought surprised. Was that a good sign?
Inara hadn't expected him to say something like that, to be so honoust. He'd never say something like that, but he just did. Her eyes wondered to the shirt that he held in front of him. That explained the shirt he was holding in front of him, how could she not have noticed before? She had been somewhere else with her thoughts, she was thinking of Blake, everything that had happened, how hurt Sivella was and how Mal had gotten into this.
'But ofcourse, you already knew. 'Cause you're a Companion. You have to know. You know exactly what sort of effect you have on men, or woman.' She heard Mal's voice.
On contrary to popular believe, Inara had to admit that a Companion didn't know EVERYTHING about men. She didn't know everything about Mal. Sometimes she felt as if she knew nothing about the man. He could be such a mystery to her.
She felt dazed. Ofcourse she had known her effect on men or woman, but Mal? She had thought that he was attracted to her but she had managed to ward that off somehow. No, that was a lie, she knew that he was attracted to her, but she just pushed that knowledge away for some reason. And hearing him say that, it suddenly made it real. Very real. She remembered Sivella's words in the back of her mind. 'Why didn't you leave Serenity Inara? Make a choice! But you don't. You just keep lingering somewhere. Go back to the Training House or stay here, go back, stay here, go back, stay here, push him away, let him close, push him…. And I know how difficult it is, but don't ruin this like I did!'
'That's what you do.'
'I was just helping you with your wound.' Inara explained. 'You're assuming that it was my meaning-, it wasn't my meaning at all to-'
'Don't care 'bout your meanin' woman, 's just the way things are for me right now. You wanted an explanation, here you go.' He didn't know he could be so trutsome and clear at the same time! Maybe he was learning. He surprised himself!
She looked at the table he had said that he had wanted to push her against and then looked back at him.
'Well, then I'd suggest you keep your control because I am going to care for that wound whether you like it or not.' She stated.
She walked towards him and he swallowed as he walked back.
'No, Nara.' He said as he took her small wrist. 'I weren't kiddin' here.'
'Neither am I.' She said earnestly as she looked him in his eyes earnestly. 'Just sit down.' She ordered him as she pushed him on his shoulder and forced him to sit down.
He clenched his teeth again as he looked away and held the arms of the chair in a deathgrip.
She focused solely on his wound as she finished bandaging him with a lot of care.
He swallowed and kept looking away as he ordered himself to stay put. Why did he always just do what she said? What she wanted? His will had been to walk away, out of this room, so why was he still sittin' here? Why was he sittin' here in the first place?
'Finished yet?' He mumbled impatiently as he expertly avoided eye contact.
'No.' She said in a voice as if she was talking to a child.
What was taking her so long?
He looked down to find the bandage already neatly wrapped. 'You're already finished.' He stated disbelievingly.
'You think?' She said matter-of-factly
When he cast a glare he noticed a smile play around her lips.
'You enjoyin' this?' He asked.
'What?'
'You know full well what.' Woman's tormenting me and enjoyin' it.
Her finger went agonizingly slow over the skin above the bandage. He inhaled a sharp breath the moment something soft, warm and a bit moist touched his skin. He looked down to find her putting feather light kisses above the bandage.
'What are you doing?' He asked shocked as he swallowed hard and looked at her with wide eyes.
She placed her hand on his chest as she moved to his eye level. He inhaled sharply as he grabbed her wrist again. She looked up at him, her eyes big. 'What does it look like?' She asked him, her voice sounded low and soft.
He knew what it looked like, he just couldn't connect the dots in his brain or somethin' like that. Was he still dreaming? He had to be.
She looked at him now, only inches away from his face, he didn't dare to breathe. It was like she was asking permission, his eyes went from her lips to her eyes. She slowly closed the gap between them, he closed his eyes the moment her lips touched his. This was a dream. A good one, 'cause he felt that tingling sensation again, running all up his spine. He put his hand gently against her cheek and stood up while they didn't break the kiss. He pushed her into the table as he deepened the kiss. After a while they had to come apart from each other to breathe shortly.
'Are you sure 'bout this?' He asked softly as he looked in her eyes deeply.
She gave him such an intense look that his heart leapt.
'Yes, very.' She said as she panted, she had been with many men, had had many men close but none of them could bring up that passion that she felt right now for him. None of them could make her pant like this with just a short touch of them. Her breath caught in her throat as he kissed her passionately, she felt him push her against the table hard, melding his hard body against hers. It felt wonderful. She wanted to feel him everywhere, kiss him everywhere at the same time. Her hands roamed his muscled back, pushed him even closer to her if that were possible. It was wonderful to feel his hard, muscled chest pressing against her breasts. He kissed her neck, tracing kisses down her clavicula, she felt his warm tongue licking the swell of her breast, she moaned at the contact. Mal put her on the table and she put her legs around him as she felt her back touch the table.
'God, I have to stop.' Mal suddenly said as he panted wildly. She felt his hot breath against her neckline.
She looked at him, not being able to steady her breathing just yet.
He closed his eyes shortly, as if it strained him to say the next thing.
'What is it?' Inara asked softly. Was something wrong? It almost never happened but she felt insecure right this moment.
'I-' He swallowed and tried to pant less but he couldn't, he felt so aroused. She was all around him now, her legs around his hips, her breasts inches away from his mouth, her eyes looking at him. 'I don't want this to be over just like that.' He said.
She looked at him, not understanding.
'I can't... Can't let this be one night and next... Nothin' again. That'll break me 'Nara, doesn't work for me like that.' He said.
He swallowed. 'I want this to be 'cause I care 'bout you.' Love you, but he didn't dare to say that yet. 'Not 'cause I want you. And not just one time.'
He saw her swallow hard and her eyes became watery. He didn't understand and let go of her leg as his eyes caressed her cheek. 'Did I do somethin' to hurt you?' He asked worried.
She shook her head as a tear loosened itself from her eyes. 'No.' She said with a soft smile. 'It's just that.... I am not used to...' What could she say?
He looked at her, waiting for an answer.
'You're being so sweet.' She said as she caressed his cheek so fondly.
'You're not used to them bein' sweet?' He asked, dreading the answer. He couldn't bear it when someone mistreated her. She deserved sweetness.
She moved herself up from the table to lean on her elbow.
'You're the first man-' She looked away. 'They just want me. For my body.' She said in a trembling voice. No one had ever... She got afraid, so afraid. It made her afraid. It felt so close. 'Nothing more.' She said as she avoided his gaze. Ofcourse they just wanted her for her body, that was her job, in a way. But she had never, met a man like Mal. A man that wanted her for her, and not just for her body. A man that could stop himself from wanting her body, who wouldn't just take her if she offered. And that was what Sivella had felt too, it was frightening.
'Well, I want all of you.' He said as he put his arms around her and held her close to his chest. He suddenly let go to look at her. 'I mean, if you'd... If you'd want that too 'course.' He said feeling insecure.
She laughed shortly at that.
'You're tremblin'.' He said worried as he took her upper arms and studied her.
'That's okay.' She said as she brought her finger to his lips to caress them. Shortly followed by her own lips. 'What do you propose?' She asked softly against his lips in a teasing tone.
'That we... Take time.' He answered heatedly against the skin of her neck.
'That's a - moan- good idea.' Inara managed to bring out as she extended her neck the moment his warm tongue played on her skin. Inara rested her back against the table again as she pulled him on top of her. This made Mal notice how strong the woman really was.
'This isn't exactly....' He kissed her hungrily. 'What I was thinkin' with-' Her lips on his mouth, shock through his whole body.
'We could just-' Inara panted as she lowered her head and began to lick his chest. Before he knew it he was suddenly the one on his back. 'Keep it-' He moaned hard when she sucked at his nipple. 'Above the belt?' She suggested as she looked up from his chest. Even the sensation of her hair, spread all over his chest made him feel like he was in heaven.
'Uhuh.' He agreed as he took her face gently and kissed her again, pulling her higher on top of him and turning so she was under him again. He took the button of her silken gown and wanted to open it but the damn thing wouldn't budge. His fingers trembled. The moment his knuckle grazed with the naked side of her breast she moaned impatiently and pulled him in for a deep kiss. He finally opened the button and began with the next one. Gorramit! He couldn't open the buttons.
'It will be two days later at the rate you're going at.' He heard her whisper in his ear silkily.
'It's these buttons, flimsy thing's.' He muttered chagrined.
She sighed in a teasing way as she ushered his hands away and began unbuttoning them herself, revealing more of her cleavage by the second. He gasped as she was finished.
He didn't move. Just looked at the revealed cleavage.
'What is it?' She asked.
'Just that..' He had imagined so many times how it would be to touch her, how she would look naked, how her breasts would look 'cause she had cleavage a lot of times. 'You're so beautiful.' Great, that really weren't the word she was waiting for, he thought quickly. 'I mean, you've probably heard that a lot of times an' all, I didn't mean-' She held a finger to his lip to stop his rambling as she kissed him again.
'It does come off you know.' She whispered teasingly after a few seconds as she kissed him hungrily.
'Really?' He asked mischievously. Within a second the garment was away from her skin at those words of her and the cold table sent goosebumps all over her naked torso instantly. She gasped hard at that and he smiled. Serves you right, he thought teasingly as his hand touched her soft and full breast.
She felt his warm hand cupping her breast and moaned again as she pulled him closer. She wanted this to last forever she thought the moment he lowered his head to her breasts and she felt his mouth doing something with her nipple that made her loose the ability to talk or think instantly.
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I thought I had to make something up with all of you after last chapter, the dream hehehe. Hope you liked it, please let me know!!