Chapter 20

"Arina."

"I'm fine," I replied, with a shaking voice.

"Don't be a fool," Thorin replied, as he wrapped a blanket around me. "You need to sleep, and to eat something. You've done enough now come on."

He knelt beside me, and reached out to take my hand from where it was set clenched. I loosened my fingers to hold on to his for a moment and I looked at him. He was worried about me, and I was being stubborn. All he wanted to do was help, and I was denying him the chance to. I took a hard breath, and tried to control my tears. Thorin stayed quiet, and let me have the time to control myself.

"You've done enough," he repeated gently, letting me lean against him from where he knelt at my side.

"I know that," I whispered, looking down at our hands.

"Then let's go," he rumbled softly. "You are going to work yourself up too much if you keep going. Even you can get sick if you don't take care of yourself."

"I'll be just fine. I won't get sick," I muttered, clearing some tears from my eyes.

"You can be so stubborn," Thorin chuckled suddenly. "Come. Let me take care of you for once. It's the least I can do."

I sighed softly, my trembling shoulders dropping as he wrapped an arm around them. I was still leaned against him and his cheek pressed against my temple gently. I closed my eyes at the feeling of his beard rubbing against my skin there. It was a cherished contact, one that had almost been taken away from me. I stayed there for a little while, taking in the fact that he was warm and solid against me. He was right, I did need to stop and rest.

"Fine," I whispered, giving in.

Thorin pulled me to my feet in one easy move, and then reached out and framed my face to make me concentrate for just long enough that I could compose myself again. Blinking away the tears that were left, I nodded when I felt that I was okay to move. He let me wrap my arm around his own as we walked back out and I kept the blanket wrapped around me as I started to warm up. We walked over to the fire that I had originally been at and he sat down against a large rock and eased back a little. He moved carefully, the tension in his shoulders making me want to wince. When he was comfortable, he motioned for me to join him.

I sat next to him, and got comfortable as Dori came over quickly to hand us both something to eat. I didn't realize I was so hungry until the smell of the food entered my nose. Eating in silence, I listened to the talk going around and Dain's voice echoed across the dwarves. His booming laugh shortly followed and I couldn't help but smile a little. I could hear everything, including the coughing and moaning of the injured not far off. I knew that was going to take a while. Thranduil had set up a large tent down by Dale from what I could see, and the dwarves had done the same thing here by the mountain entrance. I let out a yawn and blinked a few times as I finished my meal.

"Are you okay, Arina?" Fili asked, from across the fire.

"I'm fine," I sighed tiredly.

"You need to sleep," Thorin said flatly.

"I can't, I have blood in my hair," I sighed, annoyed.

"And you smell," he added, making me glare at him.

"You didn't smell so great earlier either," I snapped.

He smiled at me, and reached for a pot to put some water in. Bofur hopped up to help him, and came back with a cloth and the pot was soon steaming with hot water. Thorin adjusted himself to do what he wanted next. Sitting behind me, Thorin grabbed my hair and gathered it in his hands and brought it over my back. I almost shuddered at the feeling of his fingers grazing along my shoulders. The dwarf lord then set to work on working the blood from my own hair. He had already washed his own when I was tending to the others. I couldn't help but close my eyes as the warm water worked its way through my hair. It would have to do for now.

"Lean your head back," he rumbled gently.

Doing as he said, I felt his finger run through my hair after he finished cleaning the blood out. Thorin brought the braid he had put in back and took it out so he could wash it. When he finished, he pulled my hair back and braided it for me. I cold never get over how his thick fingers worked so expertly with hair. He added the beads into the braid itself and when he finished, he tied it for me. I looked at the night sky as he worked, staring at the stars that were shining brightly. Sighing softly, I felt my shoulders relax a little.

"There," he murmured.

"Thanks," I sighed gratefully.

His fingers lingered on my back, but he went back to eating his dinner which he had set aside so that he could tend to me. I moved back so that I was sitting beside him again and set my own plate down. My body felt heavy, and I knew the moment I closed my eyes that I'd fall asleep. I was surprised I wasn't already. Dwalin was eating his food sitting not far from us and I caught the look he was sneaking our way. I arched my brow at him when I caught his stare and he gave me a grin. Thorin set his empty plate down, and glanced at his war master for a moment. Dwalin snorted a little and took a drink from the mug he held in his hand, looking at us over the fire.

"What?" Thorin asked, his deep voice low.

"Have you kissed her yet?" Dwalin asked, with heavy amusement.

"Really, Dwalin?" he asked flatly.

"Actually, I kissed him," I blurted out before I could control myself.

I covered my mouth when the words left my lips and I looked at Thorin when he suddenly blushed. It was dark out so the others couldn't see it at least, but they all started laughing from where they laid. I felt my cheeks turn red, and it hurt from how bad I was blushing. Looking down at my hands, I fiddled with them for a moment and then leaned my shoulder against Thorin's. He glanced at me, clearly embarrassed by my outburst. I laughed at him, unable to help the sound that passed from my lips.

"About time," Kili laughed.

"Be quiet," Thorin muttered fiercely, and we were rewarded with the silence his order gave.

I looked over at the company for a moment, and then my eyes drifted back to Dale. It was late, but they'd be working through the night. It was amazing, that only hours ago we were all fighting for our lives. I blinked a few times as the horrible image of Thorin dead came to mind and I clenched my jaw tightly. Thorin was finishing his meal beside me, and finally set his plate down. Turning my head to Thorin, I looked at him for a moment. He didn't seem as tense as before, but I couldn't help but ask again.

"How is your back?" I asked softly.

"It'll heal," he rumbled. "Don't worry about anything for tonight. Get some sleep."

Bofur had launched in to a story about fighting the Orcs back in Lake-town and I couldn't help but snort a little in laughter as Fili joined in with him. I leaned my head tiredly against Thorin's arm while I listened to the story with a smile. He was complaining about his fight outside the house. I rolled my eyes, as a smile appeared on my face.

"Oh, don't smile, Arina," Fili said loudly. "We were fighting them with pots and pans in that tiny little house."

I couldn't help the laugh that escaped me. "Yeah well," I yawned unable to help it. "It was pretty amusing watching you running around. Kili smacked another with a frying pan so hard it killed the Orc. And that poor girl who I swear was braver than we were. She threw a plate right at ones face before you got after him. Of course the two elves had to save the day. I was sure it was Kili's favorite part."

"They had weapons," Bofur laughed from across the fire, and Kili turned red from his spot by the fire. "I was thrown over a bunch of boxes and then on top of that they all fell on me."

"I don't want to hear about you whining about a few boxes, after what we had to deal with," I said sourly as he laughed.

We couldn't help the laughter that erupted, and even though Thorin was smiling I knew he was thinking about when he had sent Smaug upon the city. I pressed my cheek against his arm when Gloin started talking of the ride down the river in the barrels. Thorin glanced down at me then when he felt the increased pressure.

"We're alive," I reminded him softly. "No more torturing yourself."

"Yes, I know that," he rumbled. "And it's not thanks to you that we are all here in numbers far greater than what we thought we'd have."

"Like I said," I murmured. "People can see when someone is worth following. Even when they have their darkest moments, the good out weighs the bad."

"I am glad you didn't leave," Thorin murmured. "Back when I..."

"I told you that I wasn't going to abandon you," I said softly, looking at the fire. "I was staying for the company, and because I knew you needed me. Even if I couldn't always tell, I knew you did. Why would I abandon you? You'll be a great king. You've already been one for a while now, just without the crown."

"I'm sure I still have much to learn," he chuckled a little.

Thorin shifted slightly, so I moved away as he readjusted himself to get comfortable again. He ended up laying back against the rock we were next to and threw a blanket behind him to rest his head on. I went to lean back against the other half of the rock when he reached out and grabbed me. Thorin pulled me into his hold, making me almost squeak in surprise. Several of the company members were grinning as he wrapped his arm around me. I laid against his chest, since he had pulled me close to his side. I felt myself relax some more.

"You have a good heart, that's a start," I said, fighting a yawn. "There is no doubt about it after the way your people rallied to their King today. You over came dragon sickness, Thorin Oakenshield. Be proud of what happened today."

I glanced up at him and met his smiling gaze and listened to the stories that were being told. There were stories of the journey here, and of times that had long since passed. I wasn't listening intently, so I couldn't really repeat what I heard because I didn't know. I just listened to the talk and laughter that was part of it.

Thorin ran his hand through my hair gently, and he sighed against me. "Go to sleep, Arina," he rumbled firmly and I smiled.

"Shh," I hushed him, but it wasn't very long after that I fell in to a deep sleep when I couldn't hang on anymore.

I fell in to a dream the moment I was in a sleep deep enough that I couldn't wake from it.

I watched from above as the dwarves rallied to their king before it switched to Thorin taking Fili, Kili and Dwalin up the slopes and to Ravenhill to take out the old guard post. Thorin sent his nephews in with orders not to engage the enemy while they waited quietly. The post looked abandoned, and even as I tried to get down there, I could do nothing.

"Thorin! Thorin it's a trap!" Bilbo cried running in to view. "It's an ambush! You have to get out of here!"

"We can't," Dwalin replied. "Fili and Kili are in there..."

"Go, I will go get them," Thorin commanded firmly.

The fog lifted from over the river, as Azog came in to view holding Fili and everyone froze when they saw what was before them. Azog boasted about what he was about to do and I screamed as Fili was killed, but no sound came from my mouth. Thorin shuddered as he watched his nephew get thrown to the ice below and Fili's body landed right in front of Kili who cried out in anger.

His rage took him through the fortress, slaying every Orc he came across before Tauriel was there, yelling for him. Their battle with Bolg almost had them both killed, and instead Kili saved Tauriel at the last moment by giving his own life. I shuddered as it changed to Thorin and his struggle with Azog.

The fight had been so swift, that when Azog disappeared under the ice, the dream had me believing that Thorin had won until the Orc exploded from the ice after stabbing the dwarf in the foot. I tried to aid them, but my body was frozen, unable to do anything. Azog slammed Thorin in to the ground and thrust his sword forward. Thorin caught it, and held on to it, trying hard to keep it off his chest when some emotion crossed his face.

He gave up suddenly, and let his arms fall to the side as the blade pierced him right in the chest earning a cry from him. At the same time, however he had stabbed Azog and managed to flip them. I watched as the light faded from the Orc and Thorin pulled the sword from his own chest and staggered to his feet.

He walked to the edge of the water fall, gasping for a bit of breath and I noticed tears in his eyes as he collapsed to the ground where Bilbo was scrambling over the rocks to get to him. A bird entered my view and flew over to them, turning human. I watched myself collapse against the ice and grab Thorin's hand.

"Thorin!" I cried.

"Arina," he gasped after looking away from Bilbo. "I'm so sorry..."

"Don't you say that," I whispered. "You can beat this, come on let us heal you."

"You always...were so beautiful..." he choked out, as he put his head back gasping."I'm so sorry...so sorry to both of you..."

"No, no, no," Bilbo choked out as Thorin took a gasping breath. "Thorin!"

"You are not supposed to die. You cannot give up now," I whispered as he had trouble breathing.

"It's okay," Thorin choked out. "You...you go on living...promise me..."

Blinking several tears from my eyes, I nodded. "Promise..."

"No, no, Thorin. Don't you dare," Bilbo croaked from beside him, and the dwarf gave a slight smile.

Holding his hand tightly, I let him squeeze my fingers with all he had left before his hand began to go limp in mine. He gasped for a breath, and looked at me. He smiled once more at me, his fingers giving one last squeeze. After a moment, it was still and he stopped breathing, and his heart fluttered to a stop. I cried as I laid my head against his chest, and I could faintly hear Bilbo sobbing helplessly as well. Closing my eyes helplessly, I felt the sobs rock my body as all my control left me.

"I was supposed to be here," I whispered. "I'm so sorry!"

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