First, god it took me so long to update! I lost track of time and I changed my mind a couple of times on what to do with this chapter. So did you guys hear that Skins got cancelled? Not that I care, god season 6 is so horrible I refuse to go on after episode seven.

iwetta- I agree on what you said. Personally, I don't like that kind of relationship man, where you have to tell the other everything about everything. It's just unhealthy imo. But in this case, Emily had her reasons to be like this, and so does Naomi.

This goes to Crazy2592 and that suggestion. :)

p.s. Chapters are going to be this short from now on I think.

Naomi's POV

She left. And it's the worst fucking thing I've ever felt in my life, seeing her walk away like that. But I reminded myself it's not close to what I made her feel, being lied to by someone she trust and love. It's my fucking fault, I should have seen it coming. I don't know what I was thinking in not telling her about my plan.

Hot, guilty tears spilled out my eyes; I was able to hold them in just long enough until she walks out the door. I wiped them away angrily, told myself I fucking deserve it.

"Serves you fucking right Naomi." I made my way back to chair and sat down.

I couldn't handle this emotional turmoil while I'm in here. I finished the rest of the articles I had to edit as fast as I could and I left as soon as possible. I avoided everyone and left a note on my desk telling them I wasn't feeling well.

I drove back to my flat and collapsed on the couch when I got in. I should start packing my things for my early flight tomorrow but I can't bring myself to do it. "Jesus, fuck…"

My phone started ringing and I jumped a bit. I answered it without looking who it is. "Yeah."

"Naoms, I'm fucking sorry mate I didn't know Emily knows nothing."

"Cook, it's alright. It's not your fault."

"But… shit Blondie, you should have seen her."

I swallowed hard. I have. "Cook, don't work yourself up I'm telling you it's not your fault."

"Where are you? You fine?"

"I'm home. I'm just not feeling well. I'll talk to you later."

"Alright."

I lay there for a really fucking long time, motionless, but inside I'm a fucking mess. I never felt such emotions so strong for a long time, like it's going to consume me whole, devour me from the inside out.

Last time I felt this paralyzing feeling was four years ago. I was in my history class in uni and my professor received a note, said I was excused and someone had to talk to me. I was confused, clueless on what they had to say. Then there were police, told me Nathan's car crashed and he's dead. They could have taken their gun and shoot me in the head and I wouldn't know the difference.

I stare at my phone and I thought about ringing Emily but doubts of she'll answer. She seriously fucking hates me right now I guess. The longer I lay here alone, the longer I feel like picking my phone up to make a phone call. I made up my mind and reached for it, clearing my throat as I dial a number.

X

I toss the phone aside and I made my way to my kitchen and took out the wine that's chilling in the fridge, grab a glass and went back to the couch.

I poured myself one, then another, and another. I was buzzed and tipsy and I've long been consumed the whole thing when the door bell breaks the silence of the apartment.

My heart started hammering against my chest, a little hope lights up in me that maybe it's Emily. I go to the door, checked my reflection on the mirror on the halfway before I answer the door.

It wasn't Emily. "Cook," I said weakly. "What are you doing here?"

Instead of answering me, Cook frowned at me and looks me up and down. "You off your tits?"

"It's just a bit of wine," I said, a bit annoyed. "What is it Cook?"

"Man, I want to check if you're alright. I'm really fucking sorry."

I lean on the door frame, the room seems to start spinning. "I told you Cook, not your fault. You didn't have to ditch work just to tell me that in person."

"I thought you'd need some company Naoms," he smiled.

I smile a little. "I suppose I do," I said and let him in. "There's beer in the fridge, if you want any," I told him as I settle back in the couch. He nods and went to the kitchen to grab some.

Cook comes back from the kitchen with a freshly opened beer. He sits down beside me and nudged his shoulder against mine. "You want to talk?"

I rub my forehead and shook my head. "Not really."

We sat silently for a few minutes as Cook works on his beer. But then I had enough of silence, because the things in my head screams a little louder, the fears I have feels more real.

"I fucked it up Cook."

"You didn't man. It was one time mistake is all," he said without skipping a bit.

I scoffed bitterly. "I'm the worst fucking girlfriend."

"Stop being hard on yourself, it wasn't your purpose to hurt Emily."

"Of course not." I link my arm with Cook and leaned on his shoulder. "What should I do Cook?"

"What did Emily exactly say?"

"That we need things to cool off before we talk again."

"Nothing good happens when you talk while you're angry at something."

I cracked a little smile. "That was rich, you're not exactly the calm, let's-cool-things-off kind of guy."

He laughs at that. "You're right. I'm not the giving-an-advice kind of guy ain't I?"

I take my head off his shoulder and looks at him. "I don't care, what's important is you try."

"Uncle Cookie's always here, as long as there's free beer," he smiles cheekily and raised the can of beer at me before he finishes it off.

Cook's a good friend, you'd be lucky to have him as your mate. He's loyal and would be there for you if you needed him. "So what should we do now? I have another bottle of wine in the fridge."

"I don't think so, you're going to New York tomorrow. You don't need a fucking hang over."

I cast my eyes down and bit my lip. "I'm not going anymore."

"What?"

"I'm not going to the interview Cook. I called Newsweek not long after you arrive to cancel."

"Why the fuck you're not going?"

"Honestly, I don't care about the job. It's just a fucking job, I already have one. But when Emily told me we need time apart and walked away from me this morning, I swear I went crazy. I don't want to lose her. I can't lose her Cook."

"Have you told Michael?"

"Not yet, but he'll understand," I shrugged.

"Emily doesn't want to lose you too Blondie. So maybe this cooling off shit is her way not to damage any more of your relationship because it's important to her."

"I know she meant well when she said that. I just wish I could tell her how sorry I am."

"So what ya gonna do, you go to Emily."

"What, now?"

"Right fucking now."

"But she doesn't want to see me right now."

"Because she thinks you're leaving and she'd feel less pain when you she ain't gonna see you. But you're not leaving anymore."

"I'm not sure I could…"

Cook stood up, not having anything of it. "Come on, I'll drive. If you're lucky, you'll be okay with Em again tonight."

"What if she doesn't want me there?"

"She'd want you there all right, what the fuck you talking about?"

"You don't know if she'd want me there."

"There's only one way to find out," he said with a raised eyebrow. He wears me down.

"Oh good governor. Fuck it, let's go."

"All right!"

"No, wait."

"What?"

"I'm going to see Michael first."

X

I let Cook drive to my parents' house and we arrived in record time, reminding me how I don't let him drive it in the first place.

"I'll wait here," Cook said as we get out the car.

"I won't be long." He nods and lights up a fag as I ring the door bell.

"Hi love, what are you doing here?" Gina greets me when I get in the door.

"Hi mum, I need to talk to dad."

"He's in the bedroom."

I walk towards the stairs, straight up to my parents' bedroom, Gina following behind. Michael's perched on the bed and reading.

"Hi, I need to talk to you."

He looks up, surprised to see me there but didn't say anything about it. "What is it kiddo?"

"I cancelled the interview."

"Hmm," he said thoughtfully. "Why?"

"I don't need that job, I'm already happy with my job here. I don't want to leave behind what I now have."

"And that's the only reason?" he asked while he takes his reading glasses off.

"No. I want to stay because I want to be with Emily. I love her and she's more important than anything in my life right now. Okay dad?"

"Okay sweetheart," he smiles at me. "I'm glad you told me."

I sigh with relief. "Thanks for understanding dad. Now if you'd excuse me, I have to go to my girlfriend and tell her what I just told you." I turn around and sees Gina with teary eyes by the door. "Oh no, no fucking crying please."

"Oh hush, come here," she said and pulled me into a hug. "I'm proud of you love. Emily's a lucky girl to have you."

"Not really, I'm sort of a prick for not telling her until the last minute," I said sheepishly.

"Go and fix it, you could tell me about it later," she said and squeezes my cheek.

X

I put my head on what to say to Emily when I get to her place and wills that my buzzed head would at least coordinate with me tonight if I want her to listen on what I've got to say.

Too soon, we're stopping in front of Emily's building. I gaze up to where her window is and the lights are still on. It's 11pm by this time.

"Go get your lady Naomi," Cook said with a warm smile. "Cookie will wait for you here."

I lean on the passenger seat to the driver's seat and gave him a light kiss on the cheek. "Thank you Cook, it means a lot."

Cold chilly wind welcomed me as soon as I get out of the car. I dug my hands deep on my coat's pockets as I cross the road to the old building. I stare up her window one last time before I get inside.

I get more nervous as I step closer to her floor, then my heart's just a fucking mess as I stand in front of her doorstep. My knuckle hesitates against the wood. Just fucking do it, I said and knocks on it, waits for to answer, hope that she answers.

What do you think would happen next chapter? ;) See you in the flip side!