Hogwarts Express
September 1, 1981
Narrator: Naruto 'Tao' Uzumaki

"Well, this bites." He muses after he has searches about his person for his ninja headband and weapons. He couldn't help but scowl out of the window as he begins to twirl the oak stick that he found in a pocket.

He didn't know much about where he is but he did know that he didn't really have anyone to blame for his being here other then himself and whoever those voices belonged too. I wonder I should have waited until they explain more about what this mission is about... He wonders as he continues to watch oddly dressed people continue to appear at the station.

"I wonder just where this train is headed?" He wonders but in the end, he decides to take a nap since he didn't see anything in the compartment to entertain himself with. True, he did spot a trunk but decided he rather be well rested for whatever awaits him at the end of this train ride then get frustrated with what's within the trunk.

Hogwarts Sorting Ceremony

He couldn't help but stare at the hat. Great... Now I've seen everything. Who's bright idea was it to allow it to sing? He wonders until he spots somebody with a worse color scheme then what Sakura and his friends accuse him of.

"Who's the butterfly?" He asks a kid with bronze tan. Said kid gives him a minor glare before answering in a voice oozing with disdain. "That's the Headmaster of the school, mudblood."

"Must be touched in the head to wear such a... 'fruity' dress." He muses softly as the stern woman reads names off of a scroll so that the kid can walk up to the stool and put on the singing hat. Another kid behind him snorts softly, he's not sure if its in agreement or what, so he decides to stay quiet.

Then after forty-six names had been called, the stern woman states calmly, "Uz-make, Na-roota." The hall quiet downs and he glances around, wondering where this guy who's name sounds almost like his own is standing.

"What's your name?" One of the five remaining kids asks him softly and he replies, "Uzumaki Naruto."

"Isn't that what she said?" The sole remaining girl asks and he blinks. "Huh... I guess she could be saying my name..." He admits slowly before he walks up to the stool, although before he takes the hat off and sit on the stool, he corrects the woman.

"It's Uzumaki Naruto." He says and makes sure to go through the proper pronunciation, only stopping when the graying woman finally says his name properly.

"Well, well, I didn't expect to see a member of that... mission so soon. I had hoped to have time to consider what to do with you lot but I guess I'll just have to wing it." The hat tells him and he sighs softly.

"Well, I believe I have it. It's going to trample on 'tradition' but then, change has to begin somewhere." The hat finally says after a few minutes of silence. "House Kirin!" The Hat declares loudly and he couldn't help but notice how different that declaration sounded when the hat was talking privately to him.

The whole hall just stare at him with their lips moving but nothing coming out. He gets up off the stool and places the hat down as soon as a small table appears between the staff table where the teacher were siting and the head of the table where those wearing red and gold were sitting.

By the time he sits down, there are murmurs about how odd it was for a fifth house to be declared. He didn't really pay them much heed since he had other things to think about now that the hat confirmed that he arrived a little ahead of the rest of the team for this mission.

Once the last of the students names were called and they were sorted, the fruity Headmaster says a few words before the food arrives. At the sight of food at his table, he couldn't help but stare dumbly at it before sighing. I'll just have to make request with the cooks to see if I can't get real food. He decides before starting in with the chicken wings that were on one of the plates before his plate.

And ask for some chop sticks to use until I'm comfortable with these strange tools. He adds as he stares blankly at a knife, fork, and spoon.

Kirin Common Room

"Ok, let me get this straight... You guys aren't enslaved nudists midgets, but House Elves." He says and the almost naked group of tiny beings nod their heads in agreement with that statement.

"And you guys can't accept cloths because it'll 'free' you." He says in the same even tone. "Master Naruto is correct!" The leader, a House Elf named Poky agree with earnest agreement.

"Ok... but does that stop you guys from creating your own cloths to wear to cover up your nakedness?" He wonders and the total group of House Elves blink before they huddle together for a quick, whispered discussion.

While he waits for them to answer, he glances around the small room that's to serve as his house's headquarters. He already has a few ideas on how to make it look more presentable but before he goes through with them, he figures it wouldn't hurt to study up on what kind of spells could be used to make it more... homish feel to it.

He knew for sure that he does want a statue of a kirin to stand within a few feet of the entrance. Maybe include shorter statues of a dragon, turtle, tiger, and phoenix standing at the correct points around the kirin statue, making it the center piece as well as giving it an Asian touch.

He also wanted a library off to the side, another room next to the library where study tables could be housed, maybe a small dinning hall off to the side where he could eat his meals without having to put up with hundreds of students and teachers eyeing him throughout a meal...

Would be nice to have an alarm clock to wake me up at the correct time... He mentally adds to the slowly growing list of items that would help make his stay at this school more pleasant.

"Master Naruto is such a great and thoughtful wizard! Anything that Master Naruto wants for his house sets, Master Naruto will get!" Poky announces with all of the other House Elves nodding in agreement.

He couldn't help but find the admiration with the little guy's eyes to be very amusing and a tiny bit creepy. "Good to know. Now then, I believe the first order of business is the library. I want the library off to the side and filled with a copy of every book that the school has. I don't care if you magically copy them or dig into some obscure bank account attached to the school. There will be a study room connected to the library, but I'm sure you've got a lot of spare chairs and table you can put in said room."

"Would Master Naruto want his own potion lab and ingredient cabinet as well?" Poky asks and he nods, not sure what a potion lab is but he gets the feeling it will come in handy in the coming years.

It was after midnight that he managed to hit the hay, mostly because the moment he let loose a yawn, Poky declared that for Master Naruto's own health, they will have to continue on at a different time so that he could get some rest.

Although the one thing he hadn't managed to settle on was House Kirin's colors, but none of the House Elves pressed him too much for him to pick a pair of colors.

November 1, 1981

He yawns as he heads down the stairs to the minor dinning hall that the House Elves had created at his request. He does pause to take in the sight of the ten foot tall kirin statue that's the center piece of the much larger common room. They really out did themselves when they created that one and the other four statues. He admits as he stares into the back of kirin.

The kirin's furry mane is colored a rich brow with the fish scales coloring being dull, tarnish orange. The belly scales being a creamy white and the hooves of the statue being black. Jetting out of the kirin's forehead is a single horn covered in gold. Even though he can't see the face of the kirin, he already has a good idea of baby blue glass eyes.

He straightens before he turns his gaze to the door leading to the minor dinning hall. Within seconds of his arriving at the table, a traditional Japanese breakfast appears just as he pulls his chair up. As he partakes of a sample of various dishes, a House Elf appears, Clicky if memories serves.

"Master Tao! Master Tao! He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Name is gone!" Clicky continues on that vein for while the House Elf dances around.

I should have picked a different name in that rant... But at least they've stop calling me Root. He thinks privately to himself as he tries to ignore the House Elf wearing a teal tunic and black pants tailored to fit the House Elf's small size.

It wasn't long before Clicky vanishes and he's able to continue to eat his breakfast in peace. He snaps his chop sticks and as they fall to his plate, everything on the table vanishes and within seconds, he's created roughly a hundred clones.

Without a word from him, the majority of his clones make a beeline for the library while the rest slip out of the common room in the form of cats to investigate the latest happenings of the day. He couldn't help but grin at the sight of the huge heated pool that the House Elves had created just beyond the washroom stalls. He had opted for co-ed washrooms instead of the classic men and women washrooms, although there is a wall separating the two sides just to give each gender some form of privacy.

He tosses his pajama pants into a basket next to the entrance way. A cold shower later finds him relaxing in the large, heated pool without anything covering his body. By the time fifteen minutes have passed, a clone of his dispels and he gains the memories of that particular clone.

So, Harry Potter is now an orphan, huh? Stupid title though, Boy-Who-Lived. Not the most pleasant ways to become known either... He muses with a frown, trying to ignore how similar this event calls forth Sasuke's own orphaning.

He's privately glad that today's a Sunday so he didn't have to worry about anything other then how he wants to spend the day, which will likely begin once he's out of the hot pool.

I wonder if I shouldn't try out that Come and Go room the House Elves told me about? He muses, after all, he's finding it harder and harder to find a nice spot outside to train at and he's kind of reluctant to find a spot within these stone walls to train in.

He rather not alert Dumbledore to the fact that he's more then capable to doing more then just magic and he's fairly certain that the paintings, ghosts, and the House Elves likely spy on the going ons of the school. Not that he holds it against the little buggers, only accepting the fact that they can only do so much without running into some order or other that Dumbledore have likely given them.

It's pretty amazing that Dumbledore has forgotten to tell them to stop aiding the efforts of House Kirin now that the common room has been mostly done. Not that there isn't room for improvement but.... He muses, he really didn't like the old greezer for some reason and is very determined not to slack off in his ninja training and skills.

December 20, 1981

"So you're telling me that there are hundred, possibly thousands of porn cashes throughout the castle?" He asks the sorting hat as he rests within the heated pool. It seems that the hat decided that it wanted company... particularly his company and its not as if he's going to try and steal the hat...

"Considering that your likely looking for a challenge, why not try and find as many of these cashes as you can? After all, the money you can make by selling some of these... collectors items might allow you to broaden your horizons while at school and out of school." The hat explains and he sighs.

"I really don't have a place to stay when summer comes, do I?" He asks the sorting hat and the hat remains silent, but he could guess that the hat agrees with what he said.

"Well, it's not as if I have anything better to do while this break is upon us. I might as well take advantage of the pretty much empty school to look for these things. Who knows, I just might stumble upon something that doesn't relate to porn." He muses before picking up a glass of chilled fruit juice and sipping it.

After a few minutes of silence, the hat says, "I must say, the House Elves have gone the extra mile for you. I never would have imagined they'd create this pool area."

"Well, you have to admit, it does cause work for them to do and from what Poky has told me, it seems that the number of House Elves at the school is rather... high. So high in fact that they're complaining about the lack of work to fulfill every House Elf's time. Seems that an elf only gets a turn to work about every third to sixth day. They like me because I can always find something for them to do for me." He admits to the hat.

"I'm having them learn how to make Asian style meals for me to eat while in the miniature dining room off to the side. They've decided that it's their task to go out and buy or duplicate every book out there so that there's a copy of every book in the world in the library. I have them investigating in purchasing a film projector and films to watch. They're also busy with buying and/or harvesting position ingredients and I've asked some of them to start going through Hogwarts personal vaults to organize the lot. I'm kind of hoping that they might be able to find interesting artifact that I can experiment with." He admits with a bit of guilt to the sorting hat.

"But you're not the type to take without giving something back." The hat points out and he sighs.

"I might have pointed them in the direction of exotic styles like latest muggle fashions and then gave them the idea of maybe creating new cloths for the students instead of allowing those that come from poor homes to wear rags... I also believe I mentioned something about stables... Does Hogwarts even have stables?" He muses and the hat chuckles.

"To answer your question, there are stables at Hogwarts. You see, that pet rule only applies to First years students. In the past, when relations with the muggle world were closer then what they are today, students were often taught how to ride just about anything or to house their favorite mounts, be they Hippogriff or a normal horse." The sorting hat says and he couldn't help but get thoughtful.

"I don't suppose they could be used to house... I don't know, other large beasts? Of course, they'd have to be, at the max, the same size of... what was the large mount to be house within the stable?" He asks curiously and the hat replies, "Well, let's just say there had been cases of hybrids that grew to be fairly large, say, about a foot taller then Hagrid."

"Interesting. I'll have to keep that in mind then." He muses with a slight grin on his face. "You do that." The hat says with a hint of amusement.

Farewell Feast

He tries not to fidget as he sits at a small table between the Gryffindor table and the Hufflepuff. He had forgotten what it feels like to be the center of attention and felt he should have just remained in his dorm. Kami... I'm going to be forced fed European food aren't I?

Anyway, the Headmaster finally finishes his speech by going over who wins the House Cup. He's not all that surprised that Kirin House came in last, more then a few people snorted and murmured, "What did you expect? There's only one guy in the blood house!' He didn't really react when Slytherin won the cup.

Finally the food appears and he stares at it a bit before shaking his head and using a spoon to fill his plate with some mashed potatoes, turkey, and various other food stuffs. He really didn't see how anyone could eat this type of food daily but from the size of some of his classmate's waist line...

Well, hopefully next year, I'll at least have someone to befriend. He thinks before he smirks as the potion he put into the staff's table interacts with the potion in their wine goblets and causes the teachers' skins turn bright red with various horns, claws, and fangs growing until the lot look like a bunch of devils.

That prank did work out after all. Good to know that I'm not the one who's going to get caught for it too. He muses to himself, after all, all he did was replace the potion some Seventh year Slytherin was going to sneak into their goblets. He's not sure what kind of potion the guy planned to use and its likely he really didn't want to know anyway either from the way the guy's expression shifts into dawning horror.

So Ends Year Zero of the Kirin House