Heero Yuy, L6, and the Second Suit Wars | ELLE

Another Monday, another chapter! Can't believe I'm halfway through part two with this one...! It seems unreal since I'd had this filed away for so long. Thank you so much for your continued support and enjoy! =)

Tsukino - Welcome back! Ha! ;-P Trust me, I was wanting Duo to forgive Heero long ago, but after four years, he's got a wee bit of anger left in spite of himself. (Sometimes even as a writer you can't control your characters ha! As evidenced by like the first three chapters of part three... -_-)

cheZaswulf - Thank you for your sweet reviews! So appreciated. *blush* I did think a lot about Heero and whether he would go in disguised or not. You're right, he never does in the series! But as he worked for them and they have all kinds of data on him including rental scans, no disguise was really going to matter. He'd either get through the check point or not. This will be further explained... You'll just have to see. ;-P

PART TWO | A Former Life Reprised

2.7 The Plan

We spent a slow week learning the schedule of our construction area, feeling the flow of bodies through the housing complex and the cafeteria, learning the expectations placed on our team, testing our roommates' expectations of our behavior as well. We didn't want to do anything that would cause them to become suspicious so we made sure to vary our schedules – where we went, when we went, whether or not we went together – just so they wouldn't have any preconceived notions of our activities that might alarm them if they suddenly changed.

I was actually thankful for the work. It tweaked my knee and ribs something awful but I felt my muscle grow by the day. I was thankful for my genetic modifications, which expedited my muscle repair significantly. And I was thankful for how nice it was just to work beside Duo quietly, hear his playful banter, watch his muscles flex as he moved, rhythmic and deliberate. Occasionally, I would catch him eyeing me as I worked and I tried hard not to let it affect me... but sometimes I would lose myself in a small fantasy that this could be our life. Maybe in some ways it would be better than Lyon. No Preventer missions, no one who knows us, just us. Simple work, simple life.

But I pushed it off and waited patiently for Duo and I to get some time alone together. We tried not to show each other any special favoritism aside from my natural proclivity towards his conversation and his tendency to seek me out in a room first with a warm smile. But nothing that would make us stand out as anything more than close friends. Everyone in our room knew we were friends from before our assignment here and I'm sure they assumed I was some charity case for Duo now. He made sure to spend most of his time with his new friends, cultivating relationships with them, and I often found myself observing traffic patterns, conversations, interactions.

Despite my inability to relate to most people, I could pick up fairly easily on the way people interacted with each other. Not subtle things, not when they were interacting with me, causing me emotional distress, but the tone of their voice, their posturing. Those things were drilled into me. Friend or foe? Flight or fight?

And what I saw I found disconcerting. I needed Duo to help clarify it for me. The only people who heckled, the only people who argued, the only loud and boisterous ones were in our initial group of ten. Was it possible the other two hundred and fifty or so people stationed with us were all so passive? These were ex-military guys, men who couldn't find jobs in offices or retail. I expected showdowns of testosterone filled boredom at least once a week, if not once a day. Hell, if Duo, Wufei, Trowa, and I were in a room longer than an hour without a deck of cards all bets were off on what injuries Sally would be wrapping up. Even then I was sure Duo would find an inventive way to use cards as a weapon if he got bored enough.

We finally got our opportunity on Sunday. I was growing restless with waiting for him to make time for me, despite the necessity of it all. I thought we were going to miss our chance when Lennon invited Ralph, Miguel, and Duo to run a few laps around the housing block, but Duo made a guilty face at me and politely declined. He followed Lennon out and I heard him say something about needing to spend some time with me, all apologetic like. It did wound my pride a bit, but this was the character I was playing, so I took it in stride and buried my anger.

Then he shut the door and we were alone.

His eyes studied me for a long time in the dim light and I repressed the urge to cross the room and pull him into a deep kiss. Just as I fought the urge to crawl into bed next to him at night. Just as I fought the urge to grab his ass on the construction site. Undercover. Professional. Not a couple. Nothing. Fucking nothing.

"Obviously nothing to learn here," he opened, sitting down on his bed across from me. We'd long ago checked the place for bugs and came to the conclusion it was safe.

"Need to get to the lower levels," I agreed.

"My guess is there's special teams working those areas. Their own barracks. Their own cafeterias. Maybe they don't even know we exist up here."

I nodded. "Have you noticed the people?" I asked carefully. Duo's eyes narrowed in worry. "They're so docile. No fights."

Duo mused over my words and a look of fearful understanding swept over him. I knew from his stories of his times with the Sweepers that he knew all too well the trouble a group of lonely, bored men could get into. "You don't think...?"

That they wiped all their minds? Didn't need to be said.

"Yeah. I do."

"Fuck." Duo paused. "How long do you think...?"

"We have to check in with Edward. After that."

Duo stalked up and down between the beds in the small room a few times before he threw himself down on his and then rolled over to face me. I was used to his anxious habits and knew he was feeling frustrated by his inability to do anything useful. He wouldn't have looked at me if he had a plan.

"What are we going to do?"

I couldn't help the pleased feeling it gave me to know that he needed me.

"I need to get more detailed blueprints. We'll probably have to make a run of it. Slip down into the lower levels and back to the loading bay and stow away on an outbound ship. Don't think they check outbound goods as closely."

Duo stewed over that, gnawing on his lower lip.

"You don't usually do this kinda shit," Duo grouched. "This is a Maxwell plan."

"It's flexible," I repeated the words he often used to try to convince me, though with a deadpan and not his usual optimistic boasting. "It's adaptable. It's fun."

He was grinning at me then, his eyes finally shining the way I remembered them. Excitement. Noted.

"Well, I can probably get a pretty good shuttle schedule outta Sal down at the commissary. But how ya gonna get the blueprints?"

I sat down on my bed and he rolled onto his side as I contemplated that.

"Our access is too restricted here, even for me. But I suspect they'll hook us up to some kind of externally connected computer to contact Edward. You saw all those business people on the shuttle here, they have to have more access than we do."

"So what, you're just gonna wing it?"

I frowned. "Yeah."

Duo smiled. "Cool." He reached out a hand and I stared at it for a moment and finally returned the reach tentatively. This confused me. I thought we were supposed to be professional. But his fingers were warm as they curled around mine and I couldn't have denied the touch even if I wanted to. "You're doing okay, right?"

I nodded.

"Good. This is more emotional than normal, more personal." He squeezed my hand and let it go. "Wasn't really expecting it. But every time I see a picture of that asshole's face I want to rip him a new one for trying to kill me." Duo barked a short laugh. "As if he could kill death."

I recognized that as his own attempt at over-reaching self-confidence. Unfortunately, he was never as convincing as I was.

I was quiet for a long moment as he studied me. It was a routine I knew well. Despite his lack of self-assurance, he would always take it upon himself to care for me. He could be bleeding out in my arms and he would ask what was wrong, was I okay?

Luckily no words were needed to explain my guilt in this particular situation. I could see the concern deep in his eyes and he sat up, reaching to grasp both my hands in his own.

"We'll take these bastards down." His words were firm and even somewhat comforting. "We'll bide our time, won't let 'em get to us."

He was quiet then, dropping my hands and leaning his chin into one of his own as he studied me. I felt somewhat self-conscious under the scrutiny.

When he spoke again his voice was soft. "Stop doubting yourself. I understood why Jack was different but you... You're not the same either. This whole thing, this whole plan isn't you. And I don't know –"

He was interrupted by the door swinging open and Blair entering. Duo called out a cheerful greeting and I was silently grateful his intrusion brought an end to Duo's introspective rambling.

The truth was I couldn't place what exactly was wrong with me. The self-doubt I was experiencing was vastly greater than any I had ever experienced before. Greater than when I took down that shuttle of Alliance members, greater than when I shot the wrong man in Zurich, greater even than when I was sitting in that white room waiting to reformat my life.

The only moment that comes close to this was when I showed up at that OZ base and saw Duo's battered face.

"Hey, you're seriously gonna shoot me, aren't you?" For some reason, despite the reality that shooting him was in fact my intent, the words sliced through me like a knife. And I hesitated.

I hesitated. I hesitated and that confused me. I changed plans – no, I had no plan. I risked myself – and by default the colonies and the outcome of the whole fucking war – for him.

Because I hesitated.

Because I doubted myself.

"I came to kill you. I hadn't thought up an escape plan yet."

Stupid. Ridiculous. What the fuck was I thinking? A liability. He'd just get caught again. J would fucking tear into me for this.

And now I was doing the same damn thing. I only doubted myself when it came to him. And this whole damn thing, this whole damn mission was about him.

Fuck. As Duo would say.

"Yo! 'Ro!" Duo's voice broke through my muddled thoughts and I stared up at his smiling face. "Come get some lunch with me and Blair!"

I always found it difficult to say no to him.

After lunch Duo, Blair, and I headed up to the commissary just to dick around and we ended up running into our other roommates. A couple hours later and we were all settled around a table in the cafeteria playing poker.

I have to admit, I am damn good at poker. I am a keen strategist and I am incredibly difficult to read. Duo, on the other hand, is horrible at poker, as I have learned through the years. When he has a good hand he attempts to bluff, but his nervous excitement is obvious in his body language – as obvious as his disappointment when he gets a bad hand. I think the game was a good idea because I couldn't help but crack a small smile as I won a third round, narrowly beating Lennon with three of a kind. I guess it humanized me. The other guys teased me good-naturedly and bitched up a storm, claiming loudly to no one in particular that if they were going to have to take this abuse they should at least be able to drown their sorrows in a bottle.

Lennon for his part was actively trying to befriend me and I wondered if it had something to do with Duo choosing to hang out with me earlier today. So I sucked it up and engaged him as much as I possibly could and Duo seemed pleased by that turn of events. We honestly worked better when we didn't have to interact directly like this. I knew my reticent nature could make his infiltration tactics difficult. I preferred to do technical recon while he scoped the area and made contacts.

But eventually the guys got tired of losing to me and we headed back under the disconcertingly constant artificial light of the colony. Duo and Lennon hung just outside of the door, pulling out cigarettes and staying out to talk for a while. Blair and Ralph decided on showers leaving Miguel and I alone.

Miguel had been suspiciously quiet around me since his few pointed comments, but my eyes lingered by the door for an extra second and when I turned to glance at Miguel before sitting down, I noted the way emotion contorted his dark, faintly Hispanic features.

"Do you ever think about it?" he asked me, drawing close before I had a chance to sit down. He didn't intimidate me, I knew I could take him down easily. But I thought the move was strange and too intimate and it confused me. Think about what?

I guess the confusion was obvious in my face and he leaned even closer, his voice a whisper. "You want him, don't you?"

I backed up a degree and shot a cool look at him. "What?"

"I see the way you look at him, the way you stare just a little bit longer where ever he is, where ever he's been. But he's just a friend, isn't he? He doesn't see you as anything more than that. Always right there, he'll always have your back, but he'll never be what you want him to be. He'll never be yours. Right? Tell me I'm right!" The words tumbled out of his mouth in a surge and his thick brows furrowed. I could tell he was experiencing some kind of extreme distress but I didn't know how to respond. I forced myself not to look at the door. Duo could talk for ages. It was futile to hope that he would walk in any time soon.

When I didn't answer him, he backed up, seeming frustrated and dejected. Unfortunately, despite the fact that I didn't answer, I still felt the sting of his words. And I had to remind myself, he was wrong. Duo and I – we could still have something. We did have something and we could get it back.

I was saved from that dark train of thought when Miguel spoke again, soft and contemplative.

"Did Edward tell you about what they want to do here?"

With the quick change of topic, it took me a second to register what he was talking about. The memory reconstruction.

"Yes."

He jerked his head up at my response and studied my eyes for a minute. Not that I gave anything away there, but I tried to look somewhat compliant to the conversation. I didn't expect Edward to have told the others about it. I guess it was only fair to warn them, but I felt obligated to find out what exactly he knew. And I knew Duo would be pissed if I passed up this opportunity.

"Have you ever thought about it? You know, going through with it?"

I couldn't stop the painful thud of my heart. Yes. I had considered it. Yes. I had done it. But I shook my head ever so slightly. Then clarified. "No."

"But it could take all of that away, couldn't it?" I noted his distress was back, his voice was sorrowful, sad. "You could forget about Drake and start over."

My reaction surprised us both. I was shaking my head violently. "No." I said, and then repeated with more force, "No!"

"But I came up here to get away from her," he started quickly and he looked like he might punch me, assault me in some way, but he stopped himself. "But all I can do is think about her. Think about what she's doing, who she's with right now. You know what that's like! You understand, don't you?"

"No." I was firm and I pressed a finger against his chest. Over his heart. Ironic. "Even if they take your memories, you will still feel that. But you won't know why. You will hurt. But you won't know why. You will never feel complete for the rest of your life, because you won't even know her, but you'll still want her. And you won't know why."

Miguel blinked in shock. To his credit, that was probably the most words he'd heard me speak at one time since we met. I'm sure it was disturbing. And then his face changed, maybe confusion, as he thought about what I'd said. Then, understanding, I think, and he was charging out of the room, the door slamming behind him.

After a moment two heads peeked in, Duo's long braid falling down in to the side in a straight line to the floor and Lennon's fairness blending into the brightness beyond.

"Whad'ya do, 'Ro? Ask him to play a round of strip poker?" Duo's words were lilting and jovial – causing Lennon to chuckle – but I could see worry as plain as day in his eyes. "'Ro...?" he asked cautiously after a moment and then he exchanged a glance across the doorway with Lennon. "Hey, stay out here a sec, huh?" he asked quietly, handing over his cigarette for safekeeping. Lennon took it, nodded, and shrugged, turning back to lean against the building, out of sight once more.

Duo shut the door softly and walked up to me. Miraculously the showers were still going, but I didn't know for how long, and I just wanted –

"Hey." Duo was facing me, a hand on my upper arm, that incessant worry, those kind and curious eyes seeming huge and wonderful and I realized my heart was still hammering painfully against my ribs. "What happened?"

Quicker than Duo could react, I dug my hands into his shirt and drew him into a fierce kiss, trying to impress upon him everything I felt for him in that one simple action. I didn't want what Miguel had. Fuck, but I just – I didn't want him to be right. I didn't want a friend. Not this pseudo-professionalism bullshit, not the unrequited glances, not his soft, tentative touches. No. Not anymore.

I wanted Duo to want me. I wanted my lover back.

And damn if I wouldn't go down fighting for him.

Duo's lips merged against mine as his hands instinctively sought out my waist and his fingers curled up in my shirt. My hands loosened their grip and slid across his shoulders, up his neck, to the back of his head, cradling it and pulling his face nearer until our foreheads pressed and our noses mashed together and I knew we couldn't possibly get any closer.

And then we heard a shower shut off and immediately we broke apart, breathless and overly alert.

"Shit," Duo breathed and he looked up at me, wide-eyed and gentle with affection, drawing a tender hand across my forehead to brush the bang out of my eyes. "What was that for?"

"I made a mistake," I told him quietly, bluntly. "My life was so much better when you were my future."

A faint flush colored Duo's face and for once he said nothing. Instead, he gave me one last lingering look before he joined Lennon outside again. I wondered what he would tell him about Miguel and I. But more than that, even though I knew he couldn't possibly, I wondered if he understood.