I hope you all haven't completely lost interest in this. Thanks for reading!

Catherine

A sharp knock on my door startled me into consciousness, blinking slowly as I lifted my head off of numb arms. I glanced up at the clock, squinting tired eyes at the face of it- 4:30. Running a hand through mussed hair, I retrieved my abandoned pen, glancing down at the half finished paperwork sprawled out in front of me.

"Come in"

Nick popped his head around the corner, his smile calming my overworked nerves as I motioned him inside. Of all the people that could have been on the other side of that knock, his face was a relief.

"Sorry to bug you, I know it isn't easy to find a little peace around here"

Between Agent Callum making herself at home in the layout room, plastering every inch of space with gruesome photos from every scene in the series of cases involved in this investigation, Sofia's calm demeanor slipping more and more frequently, and Sara wrapped up in all of it, it was a bit like stepping around landmines out there. Not to mention Ecklie checking in every few hours, clearly shouldering the brunt of the stress from both the sheriff and under sheriff. I had bee lined straight for the safety of my office the moment I found the opportunity. Perhaps it was running, but I saw it as more of a strategic retreat.

"It's okay Nicky. What's up?"

He let himself in, closing the door gingerly behind him. I raised an eyebrow as he took a seat across from me, brown eyes bright as ever despite the dark half-moons hanging low beneath them.

"It really is nice in here" he leaned back, crossing thick arms over his chest. "Quiet. I've gotta say I miss that around here"

I snorted, leaning forward onto my forearms tiredly.

"Yeah, well don't count on things quieting down around here for a while. Not with the under sheriff hovering, and Nancy Drew holed up in the layout room"

Nick chuckled, "How are you holding up?"

What a loaded question. "Well I'm neck deep in paper work and I might be the first person to ever be grateful for that"

He smiled softly, glancing at the small towers of folders I had strewn around me.

"I'm okay, Nicky. Taking things day by day. Now what can I do for you?"

He held my gaze for a long moment, as if to assess whether or not he should believe that. I offered him a smile, grateful for the comfort of his concern, but unwilling to get into the details of it. It wasn't a lie- I was okay. No better, no worse.

"It's Greg's birthday next week"

Right.

"Now I know it's not an ideal time, but it's been a while since we had something to celebrate. I was thinking we could all get together at Joes"

Thank god someone still had the capacity to remember things like birthdays. I had very nearly forgotten that Lindsay's was a couple weeks away.

"That's a great idea, it would be nice to get everyone together. If I can manage to escape this place for a few hours, I'll be there"

He smiled, giving me a nod as he stood.

"Tuesday- don't forget now. I know you've got a lot on your plate"

"I won't. Hey, did you see Agent Callum in her 'office' on your way here?"

He shook his head as he opened the door, glancing briefly down the quiet hallway

"No, just Sara. She's been hunched over those crime scene photos for hours"

I let out a deep breath as the door fell shut behind him, pressing my palms into my eyes. I dropped the pen I had been toying with absently onto the desk, pushing up onto legs in desperate need of a stretch. I wasn't going to make it through the rest of this night without caffeine. Also, the masochistic side of me was longing to speak to a certain grudge-bearing brunette.

I walked quietly down the hall, trying to keep the resounding click of my heels to a minimum. It was like dodging bullets around here lately- step in the wrong spot and Ecklie and his particularly bitter attitude found you and began another round of 20 questions. Turn a corner at the wrong time and Agent Callum roped you into a condescending conversation about some impossible to recall detail of one of the cases. Even Sofia had become a welcome sight to me these days.

The layout room looked like a hurricane of organized chaos. Folder lay open, pictures taken down from their spot on the wall and sprawled across the table. Sara sat on a worn out stool, one leg bent, foot resting on the lowest rail. She was just as Nick had described her, bent over photos, dark brows knit in concentration. Her fingertips tapped absently against one of the pictures, a lock of hair falling from behind her ear as she turned her head to focus on another shot. I longed to brush it back; to be close to her. I was feeling her distance like a vivid ache.

"How's it going in here?" I let my gaze drift over her, leaning against the doorframe. She didn't bother looking up, but I could see her shoulders tense slightly.

"Fine"

She had barely spoken to me in three days, much less looked at me. I crossed my arms over my chest, hoping that the weight of my gaze would garner her attention. The dark circles that had become a permanent fixture beneath chocolate eyes had faded; the way her small bones jutted almost violently out from beneath her skin had softened slightly. Her alabaster complexion even had some color to it, telling me she had managed to get out into the late February sun.

I was grateful to see her healthy, but it was a raw sort of gratitude. Like a painful lump lodged in the back of your throat despite it all. Sofia was good for her. Sofia seemed to know exactly how to love her, and as hard as it was to watch, it was a constant reminder that I needed to be better. A better friend, a better partner. I wasn't going to lose the closeness we had developed over my traitorous heart.

"I'm drowning in six months worth of paperwork in there. I didn't realize how much had built up"

Nothing. Radio silence

"Are you okay?"

She sighed, eyes lifting up to gaze at the wall in front of her in irritation before glancing briefly over at me, that familiar closed off look in her eyes as they met mine.

"I'm fine, Catherine"

I tried to hold her gaze, but it drifted back down to the photos in front of her. I ran a hand over my hair, feeling the beginnings of a dull headache beginning to set in.

"I'm grabbing a coffee, can I bring you one?"

She gave her head a subtle shake, flipping another picture over the previous one.

"I'm fine, thanks"

Fine. That word out of her mouth was like a grindstone to my patience. I ran my tongue over my bottom lip, pushing off the door with a narrowly suppressed roll of my eyes.

"Fine" I spoke quietly, lingering in the doorway for a moment before giving up and continuing towards the break room.

/

The momentum behind the serial case interest was only growing as the days past, the discovery of Hailey Porter, the seventh victim in our investigation, seemed to be the gasoline on the proverbial fire that was the unwavering attention of all of Nevada.

The Arnica Killer, as the press had so originally titled him, had made front page news for the past five days. Online articles were circling, criticizing law enforcement; building their own theories on what exactly was going on. The idea that the recent police shooting was somehow linked to the serial cases was just one of the ludicrous theories making its rounds. Sofia had taken being sprawled across the Las Vegas Tribune two days in a row on the chin, though I had caught her storming out of Brass's office with all the silent power of a hurricane, an almost violent sway to her hips as she past me with a single shake of her head, as if to say "don't ask".

Agent Callum seemed particularly irritated by the explosion of press coverage, creating a chain reaction of upset all the way down to poor Judy, a cold edge to her usually sweet demeanor. I had no doubt that she was sick of dealing with our tension and tight lipped smiles; of the onslaught of calls from the press, trying to get in touch with anyone who could speak on the case.

She let out a heavy sigh as she dropped slim hands onto the table, her dark, violently angled bob falling forward as she leaned over the table.

"There is nothing tying these victims to one another. Three of them went to the local high school, two were homeschooled, two were drop outs. None of them were friends. They don't live in the same neighborhoods…"

"As far as we can tell, the only criteria is that they are blonde haired and blue eyed- between the ages of 15 and 17. Though there have been…" I glanced over at Sara, jaw set as she stared at the folders in front of us "threats outside of that range"

Hazel eyes shifted over to me, an expectant raise of an eyebrow a silent request to explain. I sighed, leaning my hip against the table.

"Detective Curtis, as well as my daughter were threatened by one of our suspects about a month ago"

"James O'Riley, undersheriff Mckeen did fill me in on that shit storm of a situation"

She sighed, drumming her nails rapidly against the table for a moment before straightening up and turning to me. "Are you still convinced that he's our guy?"

I shifted my gaze over to Sara, arms crossed as she focused on Callum with an almost eerie intensity, answering before I could form words. "Yes"

"Compile a solid list of evidence outlining your reasoning, get some sleep, and you two will explore that avenue tomorrow" she flipped shut the manila folder in front of her, turning on a heel to go.

"Without any substantial evidence implicating this guy, this will be your only opportunity to dig any deeper" she glanced over her shoulder to meet Sara's heavy gaze. "You had better be very certain about this. I'll deal with the Sheriff, but no one is going to be happy about this"

The sound of her exit resounded down the hallway, leaving Sara and I in a deafening silence.

I stared at the empty doorway for a few moments before glancing over at Sara, absently straightening the papers in front of me. I could feel the weight of her eyes on me briefly before moving to take a seat on one of the stools.

"That's good. That's…. something. We should start from the beginning- the motor oil we found on Emily Samuels arms"

She let out a sharp exhale, eyes scanning over the papers in front of her

"I've got this, you should go home"

I felt the chill of her words like a violent shove. Resting a hand on my hip, I took a breath to calm the anger that had suddenly leapt into my throat.

"Are we really still doing this?"

Dark eyes finally met mine, heavy and neutral "We're not doing anything. I'm going to write this up"

She slid off the stool, making her way towards the door. I wasn't going to tolerate it, not tonight. I started moving forward, ready to intersect her when a form appeared in front of me, effectively blocking me. A hint of a smile tugged at Grissom's mouth, oblivious to the anger rolling off me in waves.

"How's it going with Agent Callum?"

I held my eyes on Sara as she moved down the hall, disappearing around the corner silently. I flicked my gaze back to Grissom, narrowed and intense.

"I am going to kill her Gil, I have had it . This is all essentially your fault, you do know that right"

Both eyebrows raised, his head tilting slightly "Agent Callum?"

I didn't bother to conceal an eye roll, hand coming to rest on my hip as I gestured towards the empty hallway emphatically "Sara. She is just…" I pursed my lips together, lacking the proper words, before moving determinately around him and following the brunettes path down the hall.

/

I threw open the door to the roof, scanning the open space briefly before storming towards Sara, leaning back against the nearest edge, predictively lighting a up a cigarette. The pink hues of the sky contrasted against the dark cityscape, Sara's form barely illuminated in the soft light.

I didn't stop until I was inches away, her dark eyes unreadable but seemingly un-phased by my explosive entrance. She raised her hand up to take a drag, my fingers darting out to snatch the smoke from her before it could reach her mouth, tossing it onto the dark ground.

"What the fuck!"

I crushed the burning ember out beneath my toe, glaring at her with silent determination.

"You don't get to run away every time you don't want to have a conversation" I rested my hands on my hips, her dark hair blowing lightly in the cool breeze "And I'm sick of watching you smoke these things, do you even care what they're doing to you?"

She snorted, crossing her arms loosely over her chest "Isn't that a bit hypocritical?"

I ignored her, taking another step forward

"You know, this is getting old. I am sorry that I lashed out the other day, I really am, but the way you've been treating me is completely unwarranted, not to mention unprofessional"

"If you want me to be able to remain professional, then you need to stay away from me. Stop trying to engage in conversation, stop asking me if I'm okay"

Her voice was firm, a few decibels above usual. I threw my hands up, shaking my head in bewilderment.

"You don't want to be friends, that is fine, but don't you dare bring this attitude back down there with you, this department is hanging on by a fucking thread"

I held her gaze for a moment, vibrating with anger as I spun around on a heel, starting back towards the door. I made it six steps before I reeled back to face her.

"You know what, it's not. It's not okay"

This wasn't going as well as I had anticipated on the trip upstairs, but that was a risk of throwing yourself head first into things on the turn of a dime. I marched back over to her, unable to put an exact name to the feelings clawing at the back of my throat.

"I am sorry about the other day. I'm sorry about all the other days when I have been less than agreeable. What do you want from me Sara?"

She stared at me with narrowed eyes, arms crossed protectively over her chest.

"I miss you, okay? Is that what you want to hear? I miss spending time with you, I miss working with you without this animosity. I miss…." The feel of you, your soft arms, your smile…

I ran a tense hand through my hair, glancing away for a moment before refocusing on her, still an unreadable look on her face. God she was infuriating and beautiful, the first light of morning softly illuminating her features.

"Can you just fucking say something here?"

She took a breath, thinking out her words for a long moment.

"You're beautiful"

Oh. I felt my heart clench, but the rush of butterflies oscillating through my chest quickly faded into a heavy confusion as I realized that this wasn't a compliment. It wasn't even an affectionate observation, just a bland statement that seemed more irritating to her than anything.

I opened my mouth to speak, hesitating for a moment before closing it once again, furrowing my eyebrows slightly in confusion.

"You're beautiful and you use it to manipulate people, I've seen it a thousand times. Men fall all over themselves around you, and you use it to your advantage. It's… impressive"

I crossed my arms tightly over my chest, shifting my weight onto one hip, wondering where the fuck she was going with this. I could feel the anger vibrating beneath my skin, my teeth literally digging into my tongue to keep the defensive rhetoric from spilling out.

"It took me a while to realize you've been using it on me"

I felt my frown deepen, taking a step towards her. "What?"

She let out a humorless chuckle, shaking her head softly

"The motel last month, pinning me against the Denali, 'get over yourself'" she repeated my own words bitterly. I was inches away from her in a heartbeat, anger and nausea fighting a wild battle in me.

"You pinned me against the god damn car Sara" I reminded her in a harsh whisper, a warning edge to my voice.

"That's right, sorry, you did nothing manipulative there" she rolled her eyes and I clenched my right hand into a fist to keep it from swinging. I took a breath, closing my eyes for a moment in an attempt to calm down.

"Why would I be manipulating you?"

"You tell me, Catherine. To keep things civil between us? To keep me from crossing you while we have to work so closely?"

The nausea was beginning to win the fight, the edges of my anger fading into a deep, heavy dejection. How could she think I would do that to her? That I would toy with her emotions like that? I admit that the reasoning behind my actions was murky at best, but at the core of them was the desire to be closer to her. I searched her eyes, finally recognizing the hurt beneath that wall of false indifference.

"I wouldn't do that, Sara"

She was in my space so suddenly it felt like vertigo, an ever cool hand pressing softly against my stomach, the other gripping my waist. The earthy smell of her overwhelmed me, the feel of her body pressing firmly against mine. I had to grip her shoulder to steady myself, her hot breath playing over the sensitive skin of my neck, lips just brushing my ear as she whispered huskily "what do you call this, then?"

I bit back a moan, my body arching in to her, fingers digging into the skin of her shoulder for a moment before I remembered myself and everything felt wrong. I shoved her backwards, her back colliding gently with the cement wall. I could feel a lump building at the back of my throat, taking a few steps backwards.

"Was pretending to dislike Liev part of it too?"

Oh give me a fucking break.

I could feel the burn of tears threatening to fall, taking a step backwards. How could she think so little of me? I felt the exhaustion blanketing me like a thick fog.

"You know what, I'm done trying with you. But for the record, I never faked a god damn thing"

Her eyes immediately softened, taking a step towards me. I wouldn't cry in front of her- I wouldn't let this tear me apart. I held myself with as much poise as I could muster, turning to go.

"Catherine…"

I didn't turn back. I knew that Liev would be waiting for me, ready with an offer to spend the morning together. I knew that I would accept. I knew that this was a poor substitute for what I actually wanted. She was a god damn headache, a deep seated heartache, but he paled in comparison.