Chapter 20: Calculations
Heather Powers has a plan, and it doesn't bode well for Sheldon.
Dr. Powers sat in her living room the morning after the fiasco with Sheldon Cooper. She stared into her cup of coffee and thought to herself: Where had it all gone wrong? She could usually read men like a book and that man had given off the vibe of lonely and needing female companionship quite strongly. Had he changed his mind because of Leonard Hofstadter bursting into the room? No. Even her enormous ego would not let her believe that. She knew Sheldon had not been responding to her kiss even before the roommate had found them. The question remained, what had gone wrong? She knew Sheldon hadn't spurned her because of any feelings for his wife, though he might have tried to convince himself of that very thing. Heather had no doubts about Cooper's feelings for his spouse, she was sure he loved Niki Cooper very much. No, the answer lay elsewhere. Most men separated sex from love quite easily and maybe Sheldon had believed he could do that until the moment came when she kissed him. That conjecture only increased her interest in him and that went against all her rules. Heather Powers NEVER got emotionally involved with her targets, ever. Still, here she was, mooning like a small child over a piece of candy she couldn't have.
She gazed out the window and thought of all the conquests in her past. They were all quite impressive. Heather Powers did not play in the minor leagues, oh no, she only bothered to seduce best and the brightest from the scientific community. She had bagged a couple of Nobel winners, a few men on the Nobel Committee, and physicists and astronomers with powerful connections. She had few, if any, regrets about her past. In fact, she took quite a bit of pride in it.
She remembered the summer she had met her best friend, Cari Irving. They had both recently been awarded their Doctorates. She in Astronomy and Cari in Applied Physics. Neither of them had stood out in their graduating class. The best thing that could have been said about either of them was that they were both mediocre students. However, they both excelled at the art of seduction. It had been Cari's exceptional aptitude for hanky panky of the oral variety that had landed Heather's bestie her current job. It seems Hawking's right-hand man greatly appreciated Cari's attentions and secured her the position of transcriptionist for the famed physicist.
Heather had taken a different route. Her specialty had been kinky sex and lots of it. There had never been a man she could not make cry loudly for his mama and then offer her the world…until Sheldon Cooper. Even the head of the science department at the University of Chicago had fallen under her spell and had given her the position she now held as a tenured professor of Astrophysics. The only problem was, getting published. Heather had never been an innovative thinker and developing original theories to research had never been her strong point. So, she had latched on to brilliant men, literally, and had managed to have herself named as co-author on several papers she had never contributed to in any way, shape, or form. To have successfully seduced Dr. Sheldon Cooper would have been a prime feather in her cap, and to be named as a contributor on one of his papers would have set her up for life professionally. But alas, he had been completely unresponsive to her efforts, so now she would have to find a way to reach her goal by some other means.
Her thoughts were interrupted by a call coming in on her phone. As luck would have it, it was Cari Irving, calling to get all the dirt about the previous evening's events.
Hello, Cari.I take it you are calling to inquire about my evening with Dr. Cooper.
What else?I know you've been setting him up for the kill for a bit now.How'd it go?Did he plead for mercy like all the others?
Not quite.He was disinterested in all of my efforts.
What?Does the guy bat for the other team, dearie?I've never heard of a man ever turning you down for what you do best.
No, Cari, Dr. Cooper is quite straight.Married with a kid, in fact.
That doesn't mean anything.I could tell you a couple of really juicy stories about that.
No.I can tell when a man is of the gay persuasion.This guy is completely hetero, trust me.
Then what gives?
I have no idea.Hey, I tried my best, and nothing.I've got to get what I want another way and I'll need your help.
What can I do?
First, you can start a rumor at Oxford that your good friend, Heather Powers, has been having an affair with Dr. Cooper for some time now.
And then?
Come over here in a few days and spread that same tasty morsel of gossip.
And who is going to be paying for this?
Relax, Cari, I will.Now, can you do that?
Sure.I mean, everyone knows you and how you operate.I won't have any trouble getting people to believe it.
Good.I will make Dr. Sheldon Cooper pay for this if it's the last thing I do.
Honey, I love it when you get evil. Remember how you played that guy from Cal Tech, what was his name again?
Kripke, Barry Kripke.
Yeah.Well remember how you got him to get you that summer position at Stanford?That was pure genius!
Yep.Who knew he had, shall we say, problems in certain areas.He certainly had to pay through the nose to keep me quite about that little tidbit of information.ED in a Ph.D. with a lisp is almost laughable.
You played that one well.It was one of your better scores.
Yes.And one I pray I will never have to repeat.I can still hear him saying, 'I nevuh had pwobwems with getting an ewection befow'.God, spare me from ever going through that again!
I still get a laugh over that one.
Yeah, well you didn't have to sleep with the guy.You wouldn't be laughing if you had.
Look, Heather.I'm sorry to cut this short, but I have a 'visitor' coming in a couple of minutes and I want to freshen up.If you know what I mean.
What's the price this time?
A nice little deposit in my bank account.Neither one of us is getting any younger, honey.We've got to get what we can before nobody wants us anymore, or until we land us a rich husband, anyway.
Cari, you're a girl after my own heart.Have fun and make sure you get here in about four days.That will give you at least a couple of days to do your dirty work.
Gotcha.Gotta go.I'll call you tomorrow, okay?
You'd better.For now, think of some people to 'accidentally' slip up to and tell the secret of my affair with Dr. Cooper.
Will do, Heather.Talk to you later, 'bye.
Goodbye.
As Heather Powers ended the call, an evil grin began to spread itself across her face.
These two ladies, and I use the term loosely, are not very nice.Will their nasty little plan work or will the forces of good prevail?