CHAPTER 19: SO GENIUS, YET SO DUMB

America looked down at the broomstick lying on the common-room floor. It was George Weasley's, a Cleansweep Five… its owner was currently sitting in a chair nearby, looking a bit nervous. "You know what you're doing, right?" he asked. "I don't think I can get a new broom in time for the match. Actually, I don't think I can get a new broom period."

America gave him his best encouraging smile. "Don't worry, dude, I'm the hero! Now don't interrupt me, or there's a chance this thing will explode." And so he started the process of upgrading the broom. George kept quiet, thankfully, but still refused to take his eyes off his broom as America muttered spells and tapped the broom with his wand. The Beater seemed to have to restrain himself from interrupting when America used a spell to make a small hole from one end of the broom to the other and poured a potion he'd made himself into it. It was fixed with a simple, "Reparo!" A few more spells later, America handed it over. "There you go, dude! Let's go try it out to make sure it doesn't explode."

George laughed, then upon seeing America's expression said, "Dear God, you're serious." He seemed less than ecstatic as they went down to the Quidditch pitch. Despite his obvious reservations, he got onto his broom and kicked off. He let out a surprised yell when it shot off faster than it ever had before.

America grinned. "VICTORY!" He cupped his hands around his mouth and yelled, "YOU JUST KEEP TESTING IT OUT, I'LL GO UPGRADE EVERYONE ELSE'S BROOMS! TELL ME IF IT EXPLODES!"

Tracking down the rest of the Gryffindor Quidditch team proved to be a bit of a hassle. He found Fred first, wandering the halls looking for his twin. Next he found Oliver Wood and Angelina Johnson talking about tactics for the match – well, Wood was talking, Angelina was just listening and looking for a way out. Then he found Alicia Spinnet and Katie Bell talking with a group of their friends. He upgraded all of their brooms and sent them to the Quidditch pitch to try them out. He hadn't heard anything yet, and any explosions those brooms had would be pretty big, so he assumed everything was going good.

Finally, he found Harry walking out of the library with Canada, Ron and Hermione. He wouldn't actually be upgrading Harry's broom; the design of the Nimbus series was too different to other brooms, his upgrade would be incompatible. And the broom was only one generation older than the Slytherin team's, he would be fine. "YO, HARRY, DUDE, I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR YOU!"

The four of them all turned to look at him. For a moment they'd looked guilty, but that vanished once they recognized him. "Hello, Alfred," said Harry. "We were just getting that book."

America felt his brow furrow. "Huh? What book?"

Harry, Ron and Hermione all exchanged confused looks while Canada facepalmed. "Er… Moste Potente Potions?" said Ron. "Y'know, for the Polyjuice Potion?"

America's confusion only increased, and it must have shown in his expression, because Hermione said exasperatedly, "Good grief, Alfred, you were there when we were talking about it! You contributed to the conversation! You can't be that forgetful!"

America scratched his head. "Uh… nope, don't remember a thing. When did this happen?"

"Guys, I think you can let me explain, eh," said Canada. He turned to look at America. "We think there's a fairly good chance Malfoy is the Heir of Slytherin and the one who opened the Chamber of Secrets. You, Harry, Ron and Hermione all decided that the best way to find out for sure would be to get a confession from Malfoy. Then Hermione remembered Professor Snape mentioning a potion that can change your appearance into someone else's – the Polyjuice Potion. We can use it to impersonate some of Malfoy's friends and try to get a confession out of him. We just got the book with the recipe. Got all that?"

America adjusted his glasses. "Uh… I got 'Malfoy is the Heir of Slytherin' and 'impersonate his friends'. Are we using those masks from Mission Impossible? I knew there must be a spell for that!"

Canada buried his face in his bear's fur for a few moments. There was a faint sound, as if he was screaming but the sound was being muffled by fur. Then it stopped and he raised his head again, looking completely calm. "It's a potion, and I suppose that's the best we're going to get, eh."

"Probably…" Harry fixed his gaze on America. "So, what did you want to talk about, Alfred?"

"Huh? OH, RIGHT!" The reason he'd come here in the first place came back to America. "I just finished upgrading everyone's brooms. They're having a practise right now, if you want to join in."

Hermione stared at him. "Wait, you actually did it?!"

America smirked at her. "Oh, ye of little faith. I can put in actual effort when I feel like it!" His eyes flashed back to Harry. "So, you coming or not? Can't upgrade your broom, sorry, but might as well get used to working with everyone else."

Harry exchanged glances with the others. Wow, they were really getting good at the whole non-verbal communication thing, weren't they? After reaching some sort of agreement, he said, "We'll go take a look at the book first. I'll go to the Quidditch pitch afterwards."

America grinned. "Sweet! I'm gonna split, I think I heard a sound that might have been someone exploding. Later, dudes!"

A/N: I'm sorry this took so long. First I had a bit of writer's block, then my Mom confiscated my computer, then I got even MORE writer's block... HERE HAVE A HUG AS AN APOLOGY! \(^-^)/ Seriously, this chapter gave me WAY too much trouble. It's probably horrible, but I really just want it out of the way. Sorry about that. Anyway, Q&A! To SoulxMakaLover37: As of this moment, that is exactly what he has been doing. Now that I know he's doing that, maybe I can leave him out of a few Canada scenes. I always find it a bit difficult to find something for Kumajiro to do in a scene. To Miss Booty Shorts Phantomhive: Glad you like it! And Hunger Games might have to wait a bit. I just watched all three seasons Sherlock over the weekend, and it's still clogging up my head. IT'S WONDERFUL EVERYONE SHOULD WATCH IT! Don't be surprised if I write a Hetalia/Sherlock crossover at some point. I'll read Hunger Games at some point in the future. Maybe I'll just skip Mockingjay and come up with my own ending that involves a lot less deaths. To RussianMochi: Yeah, I think America might self-exile himself from this little adventure. I don't think having a cute boy run screaming at the sight of you would do wonders for Myrtle's self-esteem. And yup, I heard about the World Twinkle. It's kind of a weird name, but I'm looking forward to it. Hmm... I don't really have any plans regarding Estonia, and I think I skipped over most of the Mochi strips, so I don't think that will happen. Sorry. STRATEGIC RETREAT! To Guest: Yup! All seven books will be done so long as I don't collapse from exhaustion or something. To Cat. I'm a cat: I've had a few thoughts about the 2Ps, but not too many. But, yeah, 2P!Kuma would certainly be a sight to behold. He'd probably be more like Nyo!Kuma (aka Kumarie), more vicious and scary than the Kumajiro we know and love. Yes, 2P!Kumajiro and Kumarie would probably use the Basilisk (I'm not even bothering with spoilers, this fic works under the assumption the reader has already read the books/seen the movies) as meat for their sandwiches. Too bad that if one or the other ever does show up, it won't be in time for that to happen. And mochis or kittens... Well, mochis don't seem to have claws, so I guess I'll go with them. To Berlin: It's probably going to take a while, but I'll explain later exactly what happens when a Nation looks a basilisk in the eye in this universe I've created. And as for the story, if you're crying while writing it, I think it's a good sign! If it's able to bring an emotional response out of you, then there's a pretty good chance it will bring a similar emotional response out of the reader! At least, that seems to make sense. I've made myself cry once or twice imagining horrible situations to put characters in, but I've never actually written any of the stories those characters belong to far enough to actually reach that point. So good for you for making it that far! Well, since you all seem to think I should, once Sherlock stops dominating my mind I'll see if I can remember to give Hunger Games a read. And favourite Hetalia character... there are so many, and I love them all. I guess I'll just go with AWESOME PRUSSIA! But I love all the rest as well. Is it just me, or was this Author's Notes a bit long? I don't know, I'm probably rambling, it's kind of late. NEXT CHAPTER: Canada watches the Gryffindor vs Slytherin match. See you all next time!