Chapter 3.1: Koopa Camera Shoot

Waluigi and the Gang were zooming down a road into some dark areas.

Waluigi laughed as he drove. "Say, anyone have any idea why why Mario would take that idiotically long route every time the princess gets captured rather than just take this expressway between the Mushroom Kingdom and Bowser's Kingdom?"

Ashley shrugged. "I don't even know who Mario is except for that picture you guys showed me."

Alboort floated to the front of the van. "Well, it's not like Mario has an actual car. All he has are those go-karts."

Waluigi held his chin. "Waluigi supposes that's true." He turned to Alboort. "Say, Alboort, about this saving Princess Peach thing."

Alboort looked back. "Don't worry about letting anything slip. Toadsworth is asleep."

Waluigi nodded. "Well, Waluigi just has to say that kidnapping the princess for Bowser and then going over to smack down Bowser, so we look like heroes, seems a little underhanded."

Alboort adjusted his glasses. "You think so?"

"One hundred percent low and sneaky." Waluigi grinned. "Waluigi loves it."

Alboort grinned. "I thought you might like it."

Ashley looked up from a map. "Our exit should be just up here."

Waluigi turned to Ashley. "Come on, Ash. The least sound a little excited about this."

Ashley glared over at Waluigi. "My name is Ashley."

"Ah, calm down, Ashley." Waluigi turned into the aforementioned exit. "Look, Waluigi might seem rather aggressive and self-righteous, but at least he is used to working on a team."

Ashley shrugged. "Whatever." She put the map down and pulled out a book.

Alboort turned to Waluigi. "It looks like we're just about in Bowser's territory. Keep an eye out for our new hideout."
"Okay. Okay." Waluigi sped down the road. After a while, he elbowed Ashley. "Hey, Ash, you may want to look at this."

Ashley inhaled deeply. "My name's not Ash. And you better learn my name because it's-" Her eyes grew wide. "It's beautiful."

Waluigi scratched the back of his head. "Well, Waluigi will admit that Ashley is a nice name, but-" He looked up. "Oh, you mean the scenery."

Dark clouds swirled over volcanic terrain. A large horror movie castle stood out on the Volcano's ridge, a giant Bowser's head sticking out of the front.

Waluigi blinked a couple times. "Well, it certainly looks like a strong fortress." He snickered. "Waluigi can't wait to see what kind of loot Bowser has in there."

Alboort adjusted his glasses. "You really don't like Bowser, do you?"

Waluigi shook his head. "Waluigi hates the Red Fatso and the Green Bean a little more, but the Fat Lizard isn't a great pal of Waluigi's, either."

Alboort smiled. "So there shouldn't be any issues about messing up the castle."

Waluigi grinned. "Let's just grab the girl and the gold and get out of here."

"Well, I'm afraid it won't be quite that simple, but it's not the most complex plan ever." Alboort looked over to the side. "Oh, here's our new place."

Waluigi and Ashley looked over. There, in the middle of all the darkness and gloom, a single country house stood in the one ray of open sunlight.

Ashley reeled back in disgust. "What's that doing here?"

Waluigi turned around and looked Alboort in the face. "Waluigi is beginning to wonder about these freaky associates of yours."

Alboort frowned. "Quit complaining. I know it stands out, but it might as well be the haunted mansion of this area. Nobody goes near it." He tightened his bowtie. "Now, let's park and get moved in. You'll need to pull some reconnaissance tonight, Waluigi."

---

Waluigi walked out of the country house and pulled out his Thieftech. "Look, Alboort, Waluigi will admit that the beds are nice and that there is pretty good cable reception, but Waluigi still doesn't understand how a house like this could exist in Bowser's Kingdom."

"Waluigi, it's just monsoon season. The lack of sunlight prevents most plant growth, but it actually is pretty nice around here most of the year. That's why Bowser throws the Koopa Ball, to keep his subjects' spirits up." Alboort tapped a couple times on his keyboard. "But enough about the house. Head towards Bowser's Castle. I'll give you further instruction right before you enter."

Waluigi nodded. "Alright. Waluigi has to say, it's pretty nice that Bowser's Castle is only in walking distance." He flipped his Thieftech shut and stuck it in his pocket.

Waluigi ran through several stone pillars until he found himself beneath a Bowser statue. He looked around the statue to see the massive Bowser head that made up the front doors. He pulled out his Thieftech. "Okay, Alboort. Waluigi's at the castle."

Alboort adjusted his glasses. "Good. Now, before you go inside, I need you to take a picture of our target, Princess Peach. She should be standing on her balcony."

Waluigi raised an eyebrow. "What is it with her and balconies?"

Alboort shrugged. "Just get her picture. Now, I realize that there won't be any vines to climb up, but there should be plenty of stone ledges you can use."

"Okay. Waluigi's going up in the world." Waluigi flipped his Thieftech shut and pocketed it. He jumped on top of the Bowser statue and looked around. He jumped up, grabbed a ladge, and flipped himself up to the top of a small flattop hill. He looked around and jumped on another ledge on the mountain. He kept jumping and looking around until he had nearly rounded the whole castle. "Good grief! This castle is well camouflaged. Oh, wait a second." He pulled out his Thieftech and zoomed in. He clicked the button, and Princess Peach was captured on film."

Alboort replaced the picture. "Okay. Princess Peach is commonly captive to Bowser. She looks pretty comfortable. I suppose Bowser must keep a special suite for her."

"Say, Alboort. Waluigi's pretty sure he can just jump down and grab the princess."

Alboort shook his head. "I'm afraid we can't do that. If we did it now, Bowser would probably just kidnap her before the whole Koopa Ball started. Besides, it would raise too many questions from Princess Peach if you just landed on her balcony like a pigeon."

Waluigi shrugged. "It was just a suggestion."

"Yes. Well, just nix the idea for now." Alboort tapped a couple of times on his keyboard. "Now, go through the front doors. We don't necessarily need to be subtle here. All of Bowser's guards should be inside the palace, and unlike the Toads, you can smack the Koopas and Goombas as much as you want. They're used to it."

Waluigi grinned. "Thank heavens. Waluigi was worried he'd have to put that stupid Koopa costume back on."

Alboort smiled and shook his head. "Don't worry, you'll get your chance to be in disguise soon enough. For now, just run in and take the pictures. There should be a clear room that has full view of the ballroom on the third floor."

"Okay. Waluigi gets to the third and looks for a window on the inside. Should be easy enough." Waluigi flipped his Thieftech shut and looked around. He jumped down and ran towards the front doors.

As Waluigi crept through the doors, he looked both ways. He crept around the first floor until he found some stairs. He crept around the the second and third floors similarly. On the third floor, he looked inside the rooms until he found one with a curiously lighted window. "This looks like the room Alboort was talking about."

Waluigi ran into the room and towards the window. He pulled out his Thieftech. "Alboort, Waluigi's a little concerned. He didn't see any guards on his way up."

Alboort held his chin. "They must all be in helping to decorate the ballroom. Now, it might be a little crowded, but I need you to see about taking a picture of one of each of the following: A Koopa, a Goomba, a Hammer Brother, a Magikoopa, and a Dry Bones."

"Okay. That shouldn't be too hard for Waluigi." Waluigi switched his Thieftech to camera mode and looked around. He zoomed in on a Green Koopa and snapped its picture.

Alboort appeared on the screen. "Koopas make up a majority of Bowser's army. They're not particularly strong, but their shells provide them with some fair resistance to both physical and magical attacks." He adjusted his glasses. "As long as you avoid their beaks, they should be too hard of a fight."

Waluigi nodded. "Okay. So Koopas are nothing to worry about." He looked through his Thieftech again and looked around. He aimed in on a Goomba and snapped the shot.

Alboort nodded as he reappeared. "Goombas are also a pretty weak. They also don't have any means of defense. They do, however, come in large numbers, so it might be a bit difficult if the brawl gets too large."

"Right. So Waluigi is going to have to figure out how to take out a whole lot of Goombas with the least amount of attacks as possible. Got it." Waluigi held his chin. "So far, it doesn't seem as though it would be too hard to just bust into this joint."

Alboort adjusted his glasses. "Maybe not, but we still need to see some more."

"Okay. Okay. Waluigi's taking pictures." Waluigi switched his Thieftech back to camera mode and searched amongst the swarms. He zoomed in on a Koopa in a helmet and took the picture.

Alboort was examining his computer screen when he reappeared. "The Hammer Brother, along with the Boomerang Brother and Fire Brother, are specialists amongst the Koopa Troop. They spend a fair part of their day training, but they love games, especially if they get to clobber someone or something in the process."

"So Waluigi will just have to clobber them in a game first." Waluigi snickered. "Or are we just going to let Ashley blow them up?"

"No, I think you should handle them. Because they're elite soldiers, they've been granted a special magic coating. Ashley may have been able to take out the Koopa Brothers in the field, but she have difficulty dealing with a whole army of them in a confined area." Alboort tapped a couple of keys. "No, you're quick reflexes would probably do better at the job, but we'll talk about that later. Get the rest of the pictures."

"Okay. Sorry. Waluigi was just making sure he had the info." Waluigi pulled camera mode again and looked around. This time, he took a picture of a Koopa in a gown.

Alboort nodded as he reappeared on the screen. "Now, Magikoopas are a very vain group. Even though they have a special magic endurance, they usually enhance everyone else. Ashley could probably stir these guys into competition. But if all else fails, she could just drop a house on the whole lot of them."

"Okay, so we'll let Ashley take care of the magic." Waluigi looked around with his Thieftech. He paused when he came across a strange creature and took its picture. "Hey, Alboort, what's with this guy? He's all bones?"

"That's a Dry Bones. They seem to be reincarnated Koopas."

Waluigi frowned. "You mean they're dead guys? How are we supposed to fight that?"

Alboort clicked on his mouse a couple times. "We don't. I'd prefer to stay away from those guys, but Bowser may be using them to hide something." Alboort tapped a couple of keys. "Speaking of which, get a picture of King Koopa himself, and let's not forget his right-hand man, Kamek, and his children."

"That sounds like a heavy order." Waluigi spun his Thieftech on his finger. "But don't worry. Waluigi will take care of it." He placed the Thieftech next to his eye and looked through the window again. He was searching the ground, when something in the air caught his eye. He looked up and took a picture.

Alboort appeared on the screen. "Well, this looks like our good friend, Kamek."

Waluigi scowled. "The little fink tried to get away without paying us." He clenched a fist. "Waluigi would love to wipe that little jerk across the floor."

"Calm down, Waluigi. You have to remember that we're on their turf, now." Alboort tapped a couple of keys. "Kamek may be a traveling magician, but he also is very science-based. We'll have to come up with a strategy before we get him out of the way. We will need to get him out of the way, though, as he both deserves it and could get in the way."

Waluigi nodded. He switched back to camera mode and looked around again. He froze and quickly snapped a picture. "Alboort, what's going on here? Waluigi thought there was only one Bowser, but there's, like, ten of them down there."

"You're right, there is only one Bowser." Alboort adjusted his glasses. "These are Bowser's children."

"Bowser's children?!" Waluigi shook his head. "Waluigi means, he knew about Bowser Jr., but what about the rest of these guys."

"Oh. Mario knows the rest of these guys, well." Alboort clicked on his mouse several times and stared at his screen. "They seemed to have gone underground for a while, though. However, as you can see, they've spent quite a bit of time growing."

Waluigi swallowed. "Yeah. Waluigi doesn't like the idea of having to fight those freaks."

"Don't worry." Alboort's glasses glinted. "I'll come up with a way to get rid of them smoothly."

"Okay." Waluigi looked around for a second. "Oh, hold on a minute." He adjusted his Thieftech and zoomed in on Bowser. He snapped the photo. "There you are. The whole collection."

Alboort nodded. "It's nice, Waluigi. Bowser looks like a tough one, though. He also is very protective and offensive when it comes to Princess Peach. He's definitely going to show up as soon as we go for the princess." He adjusted his glasses. "Look, it's very likely that Bowser is going to give a speech about now. Try to listen in, and see what you can get."

Waluigi nodded and placed the Thieftech up to his eye and ear. He looked over the edge and cupped his ear.

Bowser walked up to the center of the room and roared loudly. After all the creatures in the room turned to him, he smiled and nodded. "My dear children, minions, and associates, as you all know, the Koopa Ball is tomorrow." He slammed his claws together. "Now, you all know that the Koopa Ball is one of the most important events of the year, so be sure to keep an eye out for anything suspicious. I don't want anything to interfere with my plans. Even though Mario and I have a sort of 'understanding' about this event, everyone here knows that Mario isn't our greatest ally." He chuckled. "So, if anyone sees him," his eyes darkened, "take no mercy."

Waluigi reeled back from the window. He laughed nervously. "Well, Waluigi's glad he's not Mario, then."

Alboort showed up on the Thieftech screen, nodding. "However, this does complicate our plans. It seems we're going to spend a great deal of time beating the brains out of the guards."

Waluigi snickered. "Sounds like something Ashley can be excited about."

"Yes, well, it's not going to be that simple." Alboort tapped a couple times on his computer. "Listen, just return to the hideout, and I'll come up with a strategy tonight. Because of how much energy will be needed tomorrow, I may even let you sleep in a bit."

"Okay. Waluigi's coming back." Waluigi crept over to the door and looked around outside. He went on to creep his way down and out of the castle.

Mission complete,

signed,

-Waluigi

---

If anyone is asking any questions about Waluigi's chat with Ashley, Waluigi has been on most of the Mario spin-offs. True, he didn't have good chemistry with a whole lot of characters in Mario baseball, but he should know about being a team player.

Of course, looking at this game, he'll probably need to have good chemistry with a whole lot more characters, like the Toads.

Anyways, this chapter should be pretty straightforward, so I may not take long updating.

Anyways, please enjoy and review.