It's the home stretch - 5 more to go. Thank you for the reviews and please enjoy.

Chapter 20

Sunday,

3:20 pm

Pure surprise gave Eric a small opening of opportunity and he leapt at it before Calleigh could regroup and slam the door on him once more, "Don't do this. Don't let that son of a bitch win. Not now, not when we've barely started. I don't think I could stand it." He looked down at his hands. Clenching them into fists, he looked back up, "Talk to me, Calleigh. I won't insult you by saying I'd understand even a tenth of what you've been through but I promise you, at the end of the day, I'll still be here for you. Nothing you can say will change that, so don't even try."

"Eric," Calleigh tiredly wiped at her face. "It's too late. Please, for both our sakes, just let go."

"I can't. I won't." Eric edged a little closer, "Talk to me." When she shook her head again, he felt a deepening sense of panic. What had that bastard done? He was scared enough to beg, "Calleigh, please. Don't shut me out."

Calleigh closed her eyes for a moment. She should have known, hell, she did know, that Eric never stepped away from anything or anyone that he considered worth fighting for. Lord help her, this was a no-win either way. If she didn't talk, he'd tear himself apart for not stopping this in the beginning and if she did, she'd get to deal with his pity and well-concealed disappointment. What a choice - she could push him away or watch as he pulled away.

"Calleigh," Eric's voice broke in, low and edged with desperation.

With an almost imperceptible slump of her shoulders, Calleigh gave up. However much it hurt, she would have to tell him the truth and deal with the consequences. She rubbed at her forehead, how to start and where? Taking a breath, she steeled herself and began, "Ever read 'To Kill a Mockingbird'?" Calleigh glanced over and saw him nod his head, looking somewhat baffled at the apparent change of subject. "Darnell is Louisiana's version of Maycomb, Georgia. It's a sleepy old southern town where everybody has been there forever and they all know everything about everyone else. If you sneeze before going to bed, half the people you meet the next morning will ask how your cold is and the other half will be shaking their heads over your family's inclination towards respiratory complaints."

He smiled at that and nodded encouragingly although the worry in his face seemed stronger. Calleigh sighed quietly and started to ease herself back against the pillows. She tensed for a split second when Eric's arm was suddenly across her shoulders taking some of the weight. "Thanks," she murmured, not quite looking at him. She studied her hands instead, "Harper Lee understood Southerners. Remember that line in the opening chapter? '...they were Haverfords, a name in Maycomb county that was synonymous with jackass.'? It's the same in Darnell. The LeBlancs have a stubborn streak, Johnstons tend towards ulcers and Cliftons argue about everything." She finally looked up at Eric, "Want to know what they say about the Duquesnes?"

"Calleigh," Eric said quietly, "You don't have to do this." He wasn't quite sure he was going to like where she was heading, but at least she was talking to him. As long as she was talking, he figured he had a chance.

Calleigh shook her head, her hands clenching slightly, "They say, 'The Duquesnes start strong.'" She shot a quick glance at him, her eyes bright with unshed tears, "I thought... I was so sure I was going to be the exception to that damned rule."

Delko carefully eased a hand up to cover hers. They felt ice-cold. He shifted slightly, so he could sandwich her hands between his. "Your hands are freezing," he commented as he started to rub them lightly. Eric looked up at her, "Are you cold?" She shook her head, her attention now focused on their hands. He cleared his throat softly, "Calleigh, Querida, you are the exception." He tightened his grip as she started to pull away, "Listen to me. You are one of the strongest people I know." A thin thread of panic began to blossom as Eric felt her start to withdraw behind the walls again. Desperate, he changed tactics completely, "You are also, without exception, one of the most exasperating and pigheaded women I have ever met."

She stared at him in wide-eyed surprise and he gripped each of her hands, determined to at least keep her physically connected to him. He gave her a dry smile, "It's what I'm counting on to get us through this." Eric settled himself a little more firmly, "I'm not asking as a CSI, Calleigh. If you don't want to tell me what happened, that's okay. We can talk about the weather, favorite foods or your neighbor's cat. Just talk to me." The defeated look on her face when she started talking about her family and herself had been wrenching. Calleigh rarely let vulnerability and despair out for everyone to see. This wasn't the woman he was used to. It wasn't that he didn't know this side of her existed; he'd seen glimpses and thanks to Horatio and Dale, he knew more than he really needed to about her childhood. He would never understand how her parents could have treated her that way.

Calleigh ducked her head, making a determined effort not to cry again. Damn him for being so understanding, for giving her an out. Her resolve was crumbling. She wasn't normally a weepy person and she hated the emotional rollercoaster she seemed to be on. Once she finally thought she could control herself, Calleigh looked up to see Eric watching her, concern clearly visible. She plastered on a bit of a smile and said, "His name's Lionel Skritchie." The look on Delko's face was nearly worth a chuckle. "My neighbor's cat."

His eyebrows rose as he smiled, "I almost hate to ask if they have a dog."

Her smile grew more genuine, "Barkus Welby, but they call him Doc."

Eric winced and gave a mock shudder, "Tell me they don't have kids."

Calleigh shook her head and grimaced slightly. The lacerations on her neck were beginning to ache, too. She couldn't help trembling as the memory of that first jolt overwhelmed her. It had caught her completely by surprise and she'd hit the restraints hard in an automatic escape reaction. When the white hot agony had abruptly ceased, it'd left her limp and gasping. It had taken a few seconds to realize that the warmth on her neck was blood. That was all she'd had time for before the second jolt hit her and the nightmare began.

Gradually, Calleigh became aware that a pair of warm hands were comfortingly rubbing her upper arms. She raised her eyes and looked into Eric's worried gaze. He ducked his head a little, studying her from under his eyebrows, "Where were you?"

"Hell." She didn't fight him as he gently wrapped his arms around her. Wearily, she rested her head on his chest wondering how to tell him that his somewhat rose-colored opinion of her wasn't true and apparently never had been. It had been a bitter realization that she'd been deluding herself all these years. It had taken that son of a bitch only a couple of hours to prove that her life was a lie, that she was a spineless, pathetic hypocrite.

Delko shifted a bit so that she was tucked under his chin while he considered what to do. He wished he knew what the hell Owens had been trying to accomplish beyond hurting her. Whatever his purpose, he must have come damn close to achieving it if Calleigh's current mental state was any indication. Eric let out a quiet sigh as he resisted the urge to tighten his hold on her. Somehow he had to get her to open up. He knew Dale had already begun to talk to her. What he didn't know was whether she'd given the doctor anything to work with. On a good day, Calleigh could be tightlipped as hell and this was far from a good day.

Giving her a quick kiss on top of the head, he forced himself to relax, "Hey, did you hear about the Darwin case Ryan investigaged the other day?" Feeling her shake her head, he chuckled softly, "Seems a Mr. Larkin had a container of old gas that he needed to get rid of and a bunch of moles he wanted to get rid of and he decided to kill two birds with one stone."

Calleigh pulled back enough to look at him, grateful for the change of subject, "He didn't."

"He did," Eric grinned. "He emptied 5 gallons of gas into the tunnels crisscrossing his lawn, figuring the smell and the fumes would drive the little beasts away. Once that was done, he pulled his Harley out of the garage to work on it."

"Oh no," Calleigh was beginning to smile.

"Oh yes. An hour or so later, he finished working on the bike, hopped on and started it up." Delko paused for effect, "A spark from the engine ignited the fumes and his whole front lawn blew up."

"Oh my lord," Calleigh laughed quietly, keeping a hand on her side. "Mr. Larkin survived?"

Eric nodded, pleased to have lightened her mood somewhat, "Bruises and some minor burns - and the Harley's going to need some more work." He adopted a solemn look, "No word on mole casualties, though."

They grinned at each other and Calleigh tilted her head to one side, "I've got one for you. Did I ever tell you about the woman who tried to kill her husband with peanut butter?"

Eric shook his head, "He was allergic?"

"No, but he was diabetic." Calleigh relaxed back into the pillows while maintaining a grip on Eric's hand. Bless the man for doing his best to take her mind off things. He always knew the right tone to take with her. It was one of the many things she loved about him. Stepping away from him was going to hurt like hell but it would be for the best. Eric deserved better than what little she had left to offer. Suddenly realizing her pause had grown too long, Calleigh flashed him a quick smile and continued her story, "This was back in New Orleans. A friend of mine, Barton Tribideaux, caught the case. Seems the husband woke up one morning to find the sheets at the foot of the bed were soaked in blood. He'd lost part of his toes."

Delko frowned, "He didn't wake up when it happened?"

Calleigh shook her head, "No, his diabetes was at the stage where he'd lost all sensation in his feet. Anyway, his wife took him to the Emergency Room where they fixed him up and sent him home. About a month later, the same thing happens. He wakes up, the bed is soaked in blood and he's missing more toes. They go to the ER again and wind up with the same doctor. He gets suspicious and calls the police. Barton shows up, reads the files and they confront the wife. Turns out she was coating her husband's toes with peanut butter and letting the family dog munch on them, hoping he'd bleed to death in the middle of the night."

Eric stared at her, "I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that the wife thought she could kill her husband that way or that the family dog didn't stop with licking the peanut butter." He raised an eyebrow and smiled, "Just in case, I think we'll need to set some rules - no peanut butter if there's a dog in the house."

Calleigh's eyes widened. "What did you say?" she asked weakly.

Somewhat perplexed by her reaction, Delko ran over his last statements and then stopped. Oh. He ducked his head and gave her a sheepish grin, "Well, um, it seems like we'll need to do something to ease the transition. We're both pretty independent and having some ground rules in place would probably help until we get used to each other's routines, but if you want a dog and peanut butter..." He trailed off. Babbling wasn't term he'd ever associated with himself but there he'd been, rambling on.

Calleigh stared at him in shock and not a small amount of panic. Now he was talking about sharing a place? God above, she needed to stop this before it went any further. "Eric."

"Calleigh, don't," Delko interrupted quickly, knowing he'd upset her again. A knock on the door saved him from her response and he looked gratefully at the nurse standing there with a small tray. Standing up, he gave Calleigh a quick smile, "Look, I'll come back a little later, okay? We can talk more then." Turning on his heel, he hurried from the room, fully aware he was running. He couldn't help it. It made him feel like a coward but he also knew he wouldn't be able to stand it if she'd said what he thought she going to say - that she wanted to end their relationship before it even got properly started.

Once he was safely down the corridor, Eric stopped and braced a shoulder against the wall, closing his eyes for a moment. What the hell had that sick bastard done? There'd been no evidence of any type of sexual assault. It had obviously been on the agenda judging from what he and Ryan had found but Owens hadn't reached that stage when they caught him. That he had tortured and traumatized her was equally obvious. Somehow the man had punched a hole through Calleigh's formidable defenses and scored a direct hit on her psyche.

"Eric?"

Deja vu. He turned to see Louise watching him. Pushing off the wall, he gave her a half-smile, "We have to stop meeting like this. People will talk."

She folded her arms, looking surprisingly like Alexx when the ME was about to cut through whatever smokescreen he was trying to throw, "What's wrong?"

Eric glanced down the hallway for a second before shifting his gaze to his feet, "I wish I knew." He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly before looking up at the nurse, "She's pushing me away and I don't know why."

Louise eyed him, "Don't you?" She turned and gestured for Delko to follow, "I'm going to get some coffee. Come with me."

Uncharacteristically at a loss, Eric fell into step with her. He didn't usually drink coffee at this time of day but maybe the caffeine would jumpstart his brain. 'Don't you?' He turned Louise's words over in his head. Did he really know what the problem was? He blinked in surprise when Louise stopped in front of an office door. He'd been expecting to go to the cafeteria or some sort of break room and hadn't been paying attention to where she was headed. He turned to look at Louise.

She gestured towards the door, "You need to talk to Dale again." Louise gave him a smile, "And his coffee is considered an alternative energy source around here - providing you survive it." Turning, she rapped on the door and then opened it, sticking her head in, "Dale? I have Mr. Delko here. Do you have a couple of minutes?"

Eric heard the rumbling affirmative and then Louise was practically shoving him into the office. She gave him another reassuring smile as she shut the door.

"Eric, come in and have a seat." Dr. Lindsay glanced up from his computer screen and then resumed typing, "I'll be done in just a second."

Delko walked over to a chair and sat down, mulling over what had happened. He was fairly certain Calleigh still cared for him and he knew his feelings hadn't changed and yet, here he was, hiding in Dale Lindsay's office so he wouldn't have to hear her tell him to get out of her life. Knowing her as he did, she had to be doing this for what she thought was his own good.

"What happened?"

Eric looked up from his musing to see Dale watching him. He shifted back in his chair, "Calleigh's putting walls up again." He paused for a moment and then shook his head in frustration, "I wish I knew what kind of mind game Owens played with her. I swear, it's like she's suddenly decided she's not good enough for me."

Dale raised an eyebrow, "Suddenly?"

Surprised by the Doctor's question, Eric's eyes narrowed, "What are you getting at?"

"I understand that she's second-in-command at the lab?" Delko nodded slowly and Dale continued, "She's smart, good at her job and highly disciplined. I imagine she took on the extra responsibility without blinking an eye, correct? So you'd think her self esteem would be through the roof." Again, Eric nodded silently, wondering where the hell the psychiatrist was going.

"I suspect that self-esteem extends no further than her professional life. That she's good at being in charge is because she's been doing it since she was a kid." Dale tilted his head, "You heard Lt. Caine. She's the oldest child of alcoholic parents. Since she and her siblings didn't wind up in foster care, someone had to have stepped up and held the family together. I would guess Ms. Duquesne moved into the role of parent by the time she was 9 or 10. That's a hell of a thing to deal with when you're just a kid. I'll lay money she felt responsible in some way for her parents' drinking - it's a typical reaction for children of alcoholics. Somehow, it had to be her failures that made them the way they were. So, in addition to keeping the family functioning on a day to day basis, she's driven towards perfection in the desperate belief that it will make everything better."

"I guess," Eric murmured quietly, half to himself. He hadn't really thought about how different their childhoods had been. He couldn't begin to imagine what his life might have been like if his parents had been the same way.

Dale propped an elbow on the chair arm and rested his chin, "The problem, of course, is that she can never be perfect - and the failures pile up. Now this has happened and, mistaken as she may be about it, it's a spectacular failure on her part. Of course she's doesn't think she's good enough for you - or anyone else."

"Damn," Eric scowled.

"Now this is mostly speculation on our part. Aside from her professional life, did you know anything else about her past? Other than what Lt. Caine mentioned the other day?" Lindsay watched the CSI carefully.

Eric glanced away, "No, not much, really. I knew about her father - I've met him, and I knew she has brothers but that's about it. She's a private person. I've respected that."

Dale's voice was soft, "But if you wanted to, you could find out, right?"

Delko straightened suddenly, glaring, "That son of a bitch."

"I agree," Dale steepled his fingers together. "Guilt's a powerful weapon with the right opening. Add physical torture and you've got a combination that could break the strongest will." He watched silently as Delko heaved himself out of the chair and began to pace in the small office. Dale cleared his throat, gaining Eric's attention, "There's no evidence of sexual assault but she's been absolutely terrified to find herself in a bed. I think we can guess what his goal was. Odds are he probably enjoyed telling her what she had to look forward to."

Delko scowled as he gave Dale a hard look, "The bed on board the Esmerelda had physical restraints built into it. Owens could have put her there at any time and done whatever he wanted."

Dale tilted his head, "But mere physical dominance wasn't his goal or he would've sexually assaulted her right from the start."

Eric tried not to think about the other items they'd found. Calleigh might have survived physically from their use, but mentally, he wasn't so sure. His eyes widened slightly as realization hit, "Oh my god."

"What?" Dale leaned forward at the horror-stricken expression on Eric's face.

Delko turned to look at him, "He was killing her mind."