A/N: Finally!! Here's the next chapter and I'm sorry for taking so long. =.= Tied down with work and well, it just gets so exasperating that I can't find the energy to write my story. Sorry all! But the next chapter is almost done. And it will be up by tomorrow.

Thanks to all who reviewed the last chapters. Those that I couldn't personally reply to, I will express my thanks here. Cheers!


Chapter 20: Troubling Uncertainties

Iruka opened the door and headed into the room. The moment Anko saw him, she pounced on him.

"Iruka, you are finally here!" The purple-haired kunoichi almost growled. "Here, I need your help with the list."

Iruka sighed and let himself be led away. He turned his head slightly and noticed Kakashi sitting with Asuma in the corner of the room, talking quietly. A smile quirked up when he spotted the older man.

It had been three weeks since the incident at the Hokage mountain. Hiruzen had Mizuki released after a round of interrogation by Ibiki. Kakashi, Genma and Asuma had protested the decision at first, stating that Mizuki was a threat to the village and the other shinobi. But the Hokage had a closed door talk with the three jounin and for reasons that remained unknown to Iruka, the three men had eventually accepted their superior's decision.

Though, due to the complications of having attempted to injure a fellow shinobi, the Third had ANBU watching Mizuki around the clock to ensure that he wouldn't try anything else and that he wasn't plotting anything against the village.

But still, even with all the things that had happened, Iruka had never felt happier before. Even now that Mizuki is let loose in the village, the older chunin had stopped bothering him. When they met each other along the corridors in the academy, Iruka had politely avoided him and Mizuki never approached him, though that did not stop him from sending deathly glares in the younger chunin's direction.

Things with Kakashi were progressing at a steady pace. They were beginning to feel more comfortable around each other and their contact with each other was more frequent and natural. The shared chaste kisses, the warming touches and the gentle gestures were all becoming familiar to Iruka. To the younger man, they were beginning to feel more like a couple now, although Kakashi still had yet to tell their friends or make official anything.

The silver haired jounin turned his head slightly when he realised he was being watched. When he caught sight of Iruka, he smiled under his mask and raised a hand in greeting. Iruka returned the smile and turned away, heading towards Anko.

The kunoichi shoved a piece of paper in front of his face and sighed. "This is the guest list for tonight, Iruka. Do help me sort it out before the party. I can't have uninvited people barging into the room."

The chunin took the list and studied it over. He shook his head at the messy handwriting of Anko's and figured that it will take some time to decipher those words and put it into a proper list.

He turned and walked over to where Kakashi and Asuma sat, greeting them politely.

"Asuma-senpai, Kakashi-senpai."

Asuma nodded his greeting and Kakashi gestured for the younger man to sit. Iruka blushed lightly as he took the seat offered beside the silver-haired jounin.

Asuma stretched himself as he stood up and with a knowing grin, stepped away from the table. "Well, I will leave the two of you in peace. I will go and see if they need my help on anything."

Kakashi watched his friend's retreating back before turning back to Iruka and noticing the paper he was clutching in his hand.

"What's that?"

The chunin gave a smile. "The guests' list for your birthday party later."

Kakashi gave a long-suffering sigh. The younger man stared at him amusedly. "Anko spent a lot of time planning for this. So be grateful."

Kakashi shrugged. "Honestly, I wouldn't mind if she didn't go to the extent. I would be happy just to have a few drinks with the usual group. But she just couldn't let it go and had to invite the whole village to join her in this charade."

Iruka laughed and turned to study the list. It almost does seem that the snake summoner had almost every name in the village listed there. He focused on sorting out the jumbled up writing and wrote it down neatly onto a blank piece of paper. The two sat in comfortable silence, one working while the other watching until another voice cut into their moment of serenity.

"Hey, what are you guys doing?"

Iruka raised his head to see Genma walking towards them. Kakashi sat up from his lazy slouch and raised his hand in a half wave. The chunin turned to the honey-haired man and greeted him with a smile.

"Genma-senpai."

Genma smiled and settled on the chair opposite the chunin,. He peered at the list that Iruka was diligently writing on and raised an eyebrow. "The guests' list?"

The chunin nodded. Genma whistled in amazement. Then he turned around and called for Anko. "Hey, Anko, did you just invite the whole village for tonight?"

The purple-haired kunoichi strode over with a grin. "Well Genma, as a matter of fact, I invited less than half of those on the list."

Genma snorted. "Then what about the rest?"

Anko shrugged. "They invited themselves."

"What?" Genma stared at her.

Anko's grin was back as she sauntered over to where Iruka sat. Kakashi sighed and removed his arm from the chunin's waist, shifting away to allow Iruka to clear a place for Anko.

The kunoichi happily plopped down in the seat offered. "Well, when those kunoichi heard that we are throwing Kakashi a birthday party, they asked if they could come. And they promised to contribute to the booze for tonight." The grin grew. "Couldn't reject that, could I?"

Genma chuckled. "No, of course not."

"See?" Anko smirked. "And Kakashi only has himself to blame for the overwhelming response."

The silver-haired jounin stared at them with a bored look. "What has it got to do with me?"

"Well, if you stop looking so damn mysterious and always charming ladies off their feet, you probably wouldn't have garnered such a huge fan club out there." Anko leaned forward in the table. "I'll bet that if you would only open your mouth and ask, kunoichi and civilians alike will willingly throw themselves at your feet begging you to take them, even if it's just for a fling."

Genma and Anko chuckled. Kakashi scowled.

Iruka felt himself stiffening. A lump formed in his throat and his chest tightened at the truth behind Anko's words. She was right. It was common knowledge that most of the female population in the village was captivated by the mysterious copy nin, even when Kakashi never look twice in their eyes, always keeping a polite distance and remaining professional when dealing with them. Iruka knew he had just been lucky that he managed to catch the jounin first before anyone else does. But that doesn't mean that they can't compete with him and even more so, that doesn't mean that Kakashi can't have a choice.

The thought stung more than he thought it would. He felt the tears stinging his eyes and a sense of loss overcoming him.

And then, a hand gently covered over the one he had on his lap under the table. Kakashi squeezed his hand in a comforting manner as he countered Anko's claim.

"Maa…. Anko, you think too highly of me. There are others out there who would appeal to them better." Kakashi rubbed the nape of his neck nonchalantly. "And besides, I have no interests in flings."

"Oh?" Anko leered. "So the great copy-nin does not go for one-night stands? I'm surprised. I would have thought you would prefer different partners to meet your needs." She pondered for a minute and grinned. "Well, it's fine. You will have plenty to choose from tonight. Men and women alike. Practically all of them are here because of you. Take your time and choose one that would suit your taste."

Even with the hand over his, holding on comfortingly, Iruka felt the fear rising in him. He began to fidget uncomfortably and subconsciously, he shifted and tightened his grip on the jounin's hand.

Kakashi shot Iruka a concerned look. But the younger man was staring blankly at the piece of paper in front of him. He sighed, understanding that the conversation was heightening the chunin's sense of insecurity. He shifted his gaze back to the table and frowned deeply.

He would have to make up his mind fast to allay the chunin's fear. He had been pondering over it for the last weeks. He knew what Iruka meant to him now. But why was he still holding back?

Genma chortled. "Well, I would honestly be surprised that if one day, Kakashi would start pulling his head out from the piles of missions and start looking around for a partner."

Anko grinned. "About time. Twenty-five is a good time to get attached. And besides, mission sex doesn't come by all the time. I think it would be best to have someone who can help you out on a frequent basis."

The silver-haired jounin rubbed his temples in frustration as he felt Iruka growing more uncomfortable beside him. "I'm happy as I am now. Thank you very much. But I can take care of myself."

Genma threw his friend a lazy grin. "Well, we are just concerned. After all, you've detached yourself for so many years. It's not too late to rejoin society, you know? Hey, wasn't there this kunoichi who's extremely infatuated with you and tried asking you out a few times? Now, what's her name again?"

"Harumi." Anko chirped in cheerfully. "And she's coming later."

Iruka's eyes widened. Who's Harumi? Why hadn't he known that Kakashi had a devoted admirer?

Kakashi growled under his breath. Those two were butting into his life too much. And to make matters worse, they didn't seem to realise that their teasing was unsettling Iruka.

He was about to snap at the two who were continuing on their talk about the kunoichi in topic and causing the tension in Iruka's posture to rise when Asuma reappeared by the table with an unreadable look.

"Anko, Raidou is calling for you. Genma, Kagari and Hayate need your help with the food."

The two jounin turned to look at Asuma for a minute before grinning broadly at Kakashi and left the table. Asuma turned to his remaining two friends seated there and gave them a curt nod before walking away.

Once they were left alone, Kakashi turned to the younger man.

"Don't mind them. They don't know what they are talking about."

The chunin turned to look at him before hurriedly averting his gaze and nodded dumbly. He managed a smile on his face as he pulled his hand away from the jounin's grasp and started to gather the papers on the table. "I'm going to hand this back to Anko."

The copy nin watched as Iruka walked away. He sighed and shifted his gaze to focus on the rest of the activities in the room. But he wasn't really looking. He was lost in the various contradicting thoughts in his head.

He and Iruka had been together for a while, if he could put it that way. But he had never acknowledged the new progress in their relationship openly or made it any more official than it is now. The last few months which they had spent together, connecting on a deeper level, had been insightful and fulfilling. He had learnt more about Iruka than he had ever in the last decade. And through their constant interaction, he knew for a fact that he was falling for the younger man.

But he still had his doubts. Iruka is twenty-one – an age where thoughts were still unstable and fickleness comes more often than not. And that applies to matters of the heart too. He didn't know if Iruka has truly grasped what he wanted or if it was a just a moment of deep infatuation, which will pass after some time.

That thought made him hesitate. Iruka finding out that he had made a hasty choice in this relationship wasn't something that Kakashi wanted to deal with after they have made things official. It would only make it more painful to end it. But he knew he couldn't go on not saying anything about it. He was well-aware that as long as their status is not made known, the insecurity will continue to plague Iruka.

The jounin sighed and leaned back in the lounge seat, staring up at the ceiling. Whoever knew falling in love involves such difficult decision-making times?

A shift in weight in the seat made him turn his head. Asuma dragged out a cigarette as he stared at the group busying themselves in the other corner of the room.

"What got you so deep in thoughts?"

"Stuff." Kakashi murmured.

Asuma smirked. "Iruka."

The other jounin turned to look at him with a raised silver brow. Asuma shrugged. "I would reckon that's the only thing that could get you so deep in thoughts lately."

Kakashi sighed. "I guess."

"Want to tell me about it? I could offer advice, you know." Asuma took another puff on his cigarette and extinguished it.

Kakashi was silent for a while. Then he shrugged. "It's nothing much."

Asuma watched in silence as the first guest entered through the door. He grimaced at the boisterous speech that Gai made the moment he reached Hayate and Genma who were getting the food ready. Then he stood up and stretched himself.

"I know what you are thinking, Kakashi. But sometimes, some risks are meant to be taken. If you remain uncertain about this whole situation, it could harm both parties more than taking the action does."

With that said, the bearded jounin stepped away, leaving Kakashi to his own thoughts.

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