Masks and Revelations

Kurapika entered the living room slowly. The lights were dimmed and the only sound was a silent murmur of the TV in the background. There were two empty wine bottles on the coffee table, and two glasses. On the couch, Aada was sleeping snuggled into Leorio's side, covered with a checkered blanket, her arm on his chest, clutching at his shirt as she slumbered. Leorio's arm was draped over her shoulders, holding her close and his head rested on the top of the couch. Kurapika smiled despite the sad situation that caused the view in front of him; Leorio was such a good friend, so kind, understanding and loyal. Loving. He liked seeing this side of his long-time friend, it was endearing. For a brief moment Kurapika imagined himself in Aada's place, liking the idea of being held like this.

"Hey." The doctor's quiet voice interrupted his musing.

"Hey." Answered Kurapika and looked down, suddenly ashamed of his own thoughts.

Leorio stretched and Aada mumbled something in her sleep. The doctor brought her chin up and caressed her cheek, waiting for her to wake up, oblivious of an involuntary surge of jealousy his tender gesture caused in Kurapika. Aada blinked owlishly.

"Leorio?" she asked, "What time is it?"

"It's late." He replied, "I'll take you to bed, ok?"

She nodded, and he got up and picked her up from the couch, carrying her to her bedroom, Kurapika following. Aada grabbed her friend's shirt.

"I don't want to sleep there, not tonight. Please."

Leorio stopped and immediately chastised himself for being insensitive. Of course she wouldn't want to sleep there; not in the bed she'd shared with a man who hurt her and left.

"Do you want to sleep in my room instead?" he asked gently, wanting to make it up to her. Unbeknownst to him, Kurapika's eyes widened in surprise.

"Yes. I'd like that." Replied Aada immediately, smiling sadly.

Leorio went to his room, aware that Kurapika was following. He looked back at the Kurta.

"Would you mind opening the door for me? And turn on the lights, please?" he asked.

Kurapika only nodded, not finding any words. Once they were in the room, Leorio deposited his friend gently on the bed and tucked her in. When he wanted to leave, she grabbed his hand.

"I'll be right back, OK?" he reassured her. "I'll get you some water."

Aada nodded, feeling helpless and bereft. She was starting to feel a throbbing headache pressing against her temples, only one thought prominent enough for her to be able to concentrate on. The people she loved kept leaving her. She couldn't lose another.

"Leorio…" her voice was weak, subdued, her strength used up after she stood up to Hisoka and let him go. "You won't leave me, right?"

The doctor smiled.

"Nonsense." He said firmly, "Of course I won't leave you; I love you. You should know that well by now."

Aada smiled, first genuine smile since Hisoka left.

"I love you too... Let's stay together, always." She mumbled, slowly falling asleep.

Kurapika gasped, feeling his heart constricting in his chest painfully as he remembered words Aada had shared with him on a lonely night they shared over a cup of bitter tea.

He's easy to love, isn't he?

For so long he had been consumed by his desire of revenge that he disregarded his own feelings, especially the ones he felt whenever he was close to Leorio. And now, after he'd spent weeks with him and finally realized what it was that he felt for his friend, he was on the losing side. He watched Leorio kiss Aada's forehead and wished he could trade places with her. He also couldn't help but feel angry. How could she? He had thought Leorio cherished her as a friend, but he clearly said he loved her; and not only did she fall for Hisoka, but now that he was gone, she immediately switched to the one that was next to her? He thought better of her. He wouldn't let Leorio be a substitute for somebody else. Kurapika also felt like she was betraying his trust, disregarding the fact that he never told her how he felt about Leorio, having problems admitting it even to himself. He had thought she understood without words – they seemed to share a connection because like him, she'd lost her family and offered him acceptance and comfort without hesitation. After that night when they talked about their nightmares, he slowly, hesitantly started counting Aada among the small number of friends he had, and now the trust he'd placed in her had been shattered.

"Come, Kurapika." Leorio motioned him to leave the room.

Leorio went to the kitchen to get Aada's water. He chose to leave the lights off, only content with the moonlight seeping through the curtains, the surprisingly bright and calm face of the full moon helping him relax. Kurapika followed, unable to help it, feeling furious. Watching his friend pour water into a glass, he finally snapped.

"Are you really OK with this?" he asked, his voice sharp.

Leorio looked at him, his brow furrowed in confusion.

"What do you mean? Of course I'm not. She's hurt. I hate it when she's hurt. " He answered.

Kurapika huffed angrily.

"What I meant was, are you OK with her moving on to you just like that? She can't have Hisoka, so she takes the next best thing. I can see you love her, but don't you have a modicum of self-esteem?"

Leorio's eyes widened in sudden understanding, and then he started laughing, taking Kurapika completely by surprise and making him feel even more confused.

"Why the hell are you laughing?" he asked angrily.

Leorio gathered his courage, aided by the two bottles he'd shared with Aada earlier that night, and walked towards Kurapika.

"Kurapika…" he said, "You've got it all wrong."

The Kurta frowned, not understanding.

"Of course I love Aada." Explained Leorio, "She's the closest thing I have to family, and I have utmost respect for her as a doctor."

"But..." he hesitated, "There's nothing between us… Not like that."

"Care to explain?" Kurapika was growing impatient and couldn't mask the disbelief in his voice. He knew he was in no position to demand answers, but couldn't help it. He needed to know everything.

Leorio sighed, feeling a little uneasy with the revelation he was about to spring on Kurapika, but then decided to throw caution to the wind.

"You see…" he started, feeling a little awkward, "There's someone else I deeply care about. It took me a while to understand what I was feeling, and it wasn't easy to accept. I tried to deny it at first, because it felt strange, unnatural… something I'd never considered before. But that feeling stayed with me, until it became the most natural thing in the world."

Kurapika's brows arched and he held his breath, awaiting Leorio's next words.

"Aada knows." explained Leorio, "And she also happens to know who it is that I love. She actually teased me about it… And encouraged me to tell him, sooner rather than later."

Kurapika's breath hitched and his heart started beating faster. He dared not to hope, but he had to ask.

"Him…?" he cleared his throat before continuing. "Who is it, Leorio?"

The doctor smiled a delicate, shy smile that looked out of place given his usual boisterous demeanor.

"It's you, Kurapika." He said, touching the younger man's face gently. "It's been you, for a long while now."

Kurapika's eyes widened and took on a crimson shade. He was shaking, overwhelmed by a sudden surge of disbelief, shock, and joy. The silvery shine of moonlight illuminating Kurapika's face made him look like a creature of myth or legend, too beautiful for the rusty, sharp edges of the real world. Despite the wonder he felt, Leorio took his friend's hesitation as a sign of being uncomfortable and started pulling his hand away. Kurapika grabbed it, and then stood on his toes to kiss Leorio, surprising himself as spontaneity wasn't something he often succumbed to. It was only a brief, chaste kiss, but it left both of them feeling blissful.

"Kurapika…" it was Leorio's turn to be surprised. "Do you…?"

"Yes. I most certainly do." Kurapika said firmly, for the first time in many years making a decision without careful planning and detailed analysis of potential outcomes. For a long time, he'd been putting his revenge before anything else, be it friendship or his own needs that he chose to neglect, but now that he was presented with something he wanted, he did not hesitate to reach out for it, and it left him feeling liberated. Without thinking, he grabbed Leorio's face with both hands and dragged him down for another kiss. After a long while, their lips parted and both of them were panting, looking at one another.

"You've made me very happy." said Leorio, a small smile on his face. "So happy," he added, "that I almost feel guilty, given what she's going through."

His head hung low now, but Kurapika would have none of it, not now, when something he wanted for a long time, at first not even knowing he did, came true. The anger he had felt towards Aada dissipated, replaced by shame for judging her so harshly because of his own insecurity and fears. He gently stroked Leorio's cheek before answering.

"We'll make her better, together, OK?" he said. "We'll both be there for her."

"And us…?"

"We have all the time in the world." Replied Kurapika immediately. "I'm not going to change my mind, and I understand Aada needs your attention now."

Leorio smiled happily and squeezed Kurapika's hand.

"Does it mean you'll stay longer, even though Hisoka's gone?" he asked hopefully.

"Yes." Kurapika nodded. "I will need to leave from time to time to take care of the Nostrade business, but it won't be for long. I'll make sure of it." He also briefly thought of the Phantom Troupe, but decided to suppress the thought for now and the novelty of being able to do so felt surprisingly good. His thoughts then turned back to Aada and the feeling that had been gnawing at him ever since he witnessed the scene on the porch.

"I have to tell you though…" he said, choosing his words carefully. "I think Hisoka actually cares about her, he just doesn't understand it. I saw all of you today, and I saw him… the hesitation…"

Leorio frowned angrily.

"I doubt it." He countered, "And even if what you say is true, hesitation is not nearly enough."

Kurapika bit his lip slightly before continuing.

"I think Hisoka might be back, Leorio… Probably not anytime soon, but once he understands, he will."

"No." Leorio said firmly. "I won't let him anywhere near her again."

Kurapika cupped Leorio's face, trying to calm him down. If he was right, if Hisoka indeed cared, came to understand what it was he felt and wanted to come back, there'd be nothing Leorio could do to stop him and given the magician's obsessive nature, he wasn't sure if Aada would have any say in that either; he would simply come back to take what he wanted. Still, Kurapika chose not to share this thought.

"Ok…" he said instead, "I understand. Forget I said anything. Now let's go, shall we?"

His words seemed to placate Leorio and he nodded. They went back to the bedroom. Leorio sat next to Aada on the bed, holding Kurapika's hand. She opened her eyes slowly, smiling when she saw Leorio next to her. Her eyes travelled to their joined hands and her smile grew wider.

"You told him, didn't you?"

Leorio nodded, but it was Kurapika who answered.

"Yes. And now you have both of us." He said.

Aada moved back on the bed, leaving space for her best friend. Leorio lay down next to her, and she put her head on his shoulder, draping her arm across his chest. Kurapika left the room and returned after a moment with his book; upon entering he noticed that both Aada and Leorio were already asleep. He hesitated for a moment before making himself comfortable in an armchair close to the bed. Kurapika watched the two, their features softened by the delicate light of the lone lamp on the nightstand. It had been so long since he'd lost his clan, his family, and his attempt at revenge had left him feeling spent and empty. He listened to Aada and Leorio's slow breathing, marveling at how long it had been since he was close to somebody like this. When he opened his book and started reading, he no longer felt any jealousy, slowly remembering how to enjoy the closeness of people he cared about, after so much time being alone.

A few days later, Leorio was looking for Aada, worried. She wasn't anywhere in the house. Of course, he thought. The porch. He walked quietly, not wanting to startle her. She was there, just like he suspected; he stopped in the doorway, watching.

She was sitting on the old couch, her chin resting on her bent knees, her outstretched hand holding a cigarette that was burning out slowly, forgotten, the ash falling on the deck. There was a bottle of wine and a glass on the balustrade next to her. Now, he could see her without the mask, and it pained him. He could tell she had been crying, looking at the road leading to the house; no matter how long she was looking, Leorio knew the one she wanted to see wouldn't be back.

He wanted to be there for her. If he could turn back time, he'd never allow Hisoka into their home. She was happy before, he told himself, before making an immediate correction. No, she wasn't, not really. She was going on an autopilot, only concentrated on her job, trying to work through the emptiness, the grief. As much as he hated the magician for hurting the woman he considered his best friend, Leorio had to admit Hisoka made her vibrant and happy again, even if only for a while. The anger and resentment he felt made Leorio's blood boil. If he could, he'd beat the magician into a pulp and make him understand just what he'd been offered, and what he'd decided to throw away like it was nothing. If it only made Aada happy, Leorio would be able to suffer Hisoka's presence. He wasn't there though, and Leorio disagreed with Kurapika, who entertained the possibility that Hisoka would come back. Annoyingly enough, Gon seemed to support this claim after the boys came back and heard what had happened, but quickly learned not to discuss his views on the matter when Leorio was present.

The doctor stepped back quietly into the hallway, and walked to the porch again, aware that now Aada could hear him. When he reached her, the tears were gone, like he expected. The mask was back on, just as it was when she was at work and when she spoke to her friends. She may be able to fool everybody else, but not him. He sat down next to her, and took the cigarette from her hand. He breathed in, inhaling the smoke.

"Just come here." He said, blowing out the smoke.

Aada put her head on his shoulder as they sat there in silence. There wasn't anything left to say; she would not repeat the pathetic string of pleads, wishful thinking, apologies, shame and guilt that poured out of her that first night over too much wine. She was grateful for Leorio's reassuring presence. It had only been a few days, and despite all Hisoka had done and said, she missed him so much it bordered physical pain. She knew she'd been right to stand up to him, but she couldn't help but feel regret. They both had been angry at the time. She should have convinced him to stay, to talk and try to sort this out. She sighed. He probably wouldn't have stayed anyway. She looked at her right hand, now missing the ring, not because Hisoka didn't want her to wear it, but because she knew she didn't belong with the man who had given it to her anymore, and felt it made her situation even more pathetic. She also felt anger, mostly directed at herself, anger for being weak, for letting that man affect her so much. She wouldn't let him win, even if he had no way of knowing it. She sat up and stretched, taken by a sudden idea she liked. She needed something to concentrate on; she refused to wallow in misery if she could do anything about it.

"What is it?" Leorio sounded a bit worried.

Aada patted his shoulder affectionately.

"Nothing to worry about." She replied. "I think I'm going to write an article on the new hip replacement method I've developed, and try for Yorkshin Medical Journal to publish it."

"Oh? Good idea. When?"

Aada smiled at him.

"Now, of course."

"Now?" Leorio's brows arched in surprise, but then he shook his head helplessly, knowing well that when she made a decision, it was close to impossible to convince Aada to change her mind. "You need sleep."

Aada shrugged.

"I don't sleep well these days. I might as well do something productive."

Leorio sighed and got up.

"I'll make you a pot of coffee."

Blood. Too much, but she'd handle it.

"Forceps." Aada's voice was calm and steady as she extended her hand, knowing Lia would be there to immediately give her the instrument she needed. As usual, barely a second after stating her request, Aada could feel the reassuring weight of surgical steel on her palm. She proceeded to clamp the vein that was giving her trouble, her mind immediately launching into comparing how different the artificial grip was to the more organic one made of nen. She breathed in deeply to get rid of the unwanted train of thoughts; the last thing her patient deserved was for her to get distracted. Even if the procedure she was currently performing was relatively standard and she could likely do it with her eyes closed, the patient deserved her full, undivided attention. She wouldn't think about Hisoka, not now, and not later.

After the procedure, Aada sat down on a bench in the locker room and rubbed her temples tiredly. It's been roughly two weeks since Hisoka left and she was finding it difficult to concentrate on anything but work. Writing the article about her hip replacement procedure had helped for a while and she couldn't deny pride and sense of accomplishment she felt when she'd learned that it would be featured in Yorkshin Medical Journal after all. However, her first reaction clearly reminded her she needed much more time. She wanted him to be there. She wanted to spin him around the room and laugh, just like that night when she'd performed the procedure successfully for the first time. She wanted to share her success with him the most.

Her loss felt much different this time around; when she lost Henn, she missed him too, but now was finding that missing someone who died was completely different to missing one that was alive and well, but simply wanted nothing to do with her anymore. It hurt, only in a different way.

"Are you ok, doctor Holme?"

Hearing the worried voice of her favourite nurse, Aada managed a small smile.

"I'll be fine, Lia." She replied and looked up. "And just how many times have I asked you to call me by my first name?"

A slight blush dusted Lia's cheeks.

"It's not so easy… Aada." She said, and smiled before she continued. "You look like need a cup of coffee."

Aada winced and shrugged and Lia chuckled quietly in response.

"Not the specialty of our hospital." She reassured Aada. "It eerily reminds me of red bean soup… There's a nice new café next door and we have about two hours till the next surgery. Let's relax and drink something that was actually made of coffee beans."

Aada hesitated, but eventually nodded. Leorio told her to make more friends. Leorio told her to go out more. He said it would help. And to be honest, Aada didn't mind; she liked Lia enough to see if they could become friends. Her cheerful disposition sometimes reminded Aada of Gon. She got up and stretched her sore muscles, and then grabbed her bag to follow Lia.

Blood. A lot, but still not enough.

Hisoka smiled happily as his opponent fell on the arena floor. The magician felt rejuvenated; it may not have been the biggest challenge he's ever faced, but he loved the adrenaline rush he always associated with fighting. As usual, Heaven's Arena did not disappoint and was supplying a seemingly never ending stream of floor master hopefuls, some of them with quite impressive abilities.

So many underestimated him, especially the ones drunk on their newfound power of nen, feeling invincible, wondering how come one with such flashy clothes and make up became a floor master, convinced it was merely a stroke of luck on his part. And so the new, strong combatants often thought the magician's low number of fights meant he was insecure and fought only when he had no choice, to preserve his status. Nobody ever corrected them; the Arena above 200th floor was a jungle where only the strongest thrived, and most of them never minded less competition. Hisoka loved that unmistakable look of recognition and a brief spark of despair in their eyes when the ones carelessly challenging him passed the threshold of understanding their mistake, right before they couldn't see anything anymore. It was no different this time. The challenger still proved to be entertaining enough though.

The magician's body hummed with energy and satisfaction, his pupils widened as the adrenaline rush was slowly wearing out. It was a good decision to return. His brow furrowed; why did he even stay away? He had trouble remembering. He shrugged; it was probably nothing important.

Hisoka entered the bedroom quietly and had no problems moving around in the dark, he knew the room's layout by heart. He stripped quickly, leaving his clothes in a careless pile next to the bed. He slipped under the covers and pressed his body against another, warm and soft.

"What time is it..?" asked a quiet voice, groggy from sleep.

"Just after 3 am." He replied.

"What? You have no mercy… I have to get up in three hours."

"Do you want me to go?" he asked, amused.

"Noooo…" the person next to him turned around and nuzzled her face in his neck. "You've been gone for too long."

"Well, I'm here now, aren't I?" Hisoka's arms encircled the one next to him possessively.

"Tell me about the fight."

"Oooooh?" teased the magician. "But weren't you too sleepy barely a minute ago?"

"It's fine." He was reassured immediately. "Besides, I know you're going to tell me anyway, whether I like it or not." There was a faint trace of amusement in the voice and Hisoka couldn't help but smile before he recounted all details of his last fight on the Arena. After he was done, he was about to go back to his favourite moment, but he was stopped by a finger pressing against his lips.

"That's enough." Again, amusement was clear in the voice of the one next to him. "Come here."

She lay on her back and dragged him with her, his much bigger body now covering hers. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him even more into her, her mouth brushing against his, then becoming more insistent as she started kissing him deeper. When their lips parted, although it was dark, the magician could swear she was smiling.

"I missed you." she said. "I'm glad you're back."

It was his turn to nuzzle his face into her neck as he greedily inhaled the scent he missed.

"Mine." He whispered, and then repeated the words louder. "You're only mine."

"Is that so?" her voice sounded deeper and huskier. "Why don't you remind me, Hi-so-ka?"

"You asked for it, little pine." He growled and bit into her neck.

Hisoka's eyes opened and he looked into the darkness of his room at the Arena, trying to understand what had just happened. Still dazed from sleep, he touched his lips with his fingertips. He could almost feel the taste, and smell the resin and pine needles. He shook his head and growled angrily, sitting up in his bed. He didn't think much about Aada for the past two weeks; never before did he have to make a conscious effort to forget, but having surrounded himself with familiar routine and activities, he almost succeeded in forcing his mind to do so, until tonight, when all he worked so hard to suppress forced its way back in despite his wishes. This was unacceptable, a sign of weakness. He hated being weak. He breathed in deeply and reassured himself it would pass. He needed more exhilarating fights, more distraction, more reminders that his life was better without her in it. She would fade eventually, and everything would be back to normal. Somewhat calmed down, he lay back down and stretched, finally succumbing to a dreamless sleep that he so needed.