AN: 'The Grace – Neverending White Lights'. This is the only song I like-well, this and the one that features Raine Maida-only because I like Dallas' voice. I didn't want to pick it but the lyrics fit really nicely!

Well, I'm glad you liked that I put Rosalie and Emmett in! By the way, notice I used two T's there? Psh, I feel stupid; I hadn't even realized I wasn't using two T's because I actually know an Emmet and he only has one T in his name. So I guess it's just a habit. But Emmet and Emmett couldn't be more polar opposites, teh. Emmett's high on life and Emmet's high on…other…substances…-awkward cough-…good thing I know he wouldn't be reading this…or do I? Moving on.

For someone who needs to write a poem this weekend on Infatuation (along with 9 other assignments from the hated English teacher, Mr. I-Think-I'm-Gangster), the mood of this chapter is really putting a damper on the mood. Sheesh. Sorry for the wait, though, I really didn't know what I wanted to do for this chapter and I still really don't. Enjoy.

EPOV

I felt like I was reliving that time period when Bella had left the Center. Only this time it was one hundred times worse. Last time I had been left with the hope that my love—who at the time had claimed she loved me—would be waiting loyally for me on the other side of the doors. But now all that was lingering was unreciprocated feelings and half-hearted apologies.

Although Bella did not love me anymore, my heart's feelings for her were stubbornly staying put. I had no idea how I would be able to get over her-I couldn't-but I secretly knew there would be no one else for me. That sounds comical coming from a seventeen year old that has barely lived or even seen the world, for that matter, but I knew I was right.

Every morning seemed like a tiresome task to crawl out of bed, I was so depleted. Knowing I wouldn't be seeing Bella every day was affecting me, yes, but I had taken on the goal, I guess you could say, to putting as much energy I could muster into getting out of the retched hell they called Phoenix Rehabilitation Center. Mostly so I could brood and sulk in my own home instead of having to look at the other hopeless cases there.

Though Alice and Jasper would be two exceptions. I knew that it wouldn't be too long until the two of them would be leaving. But really, could I honestly say I wasn't used to it by now?

"Hi, Edward," Alice greeted me when I entered the classroom. I knew she was still upset about the situation with Bella but she was maintaining her upbeat attitude. She had tried countless times to bring it up, saying that Bella didn't really mean what she had told me and I wanted to believe her, I really did, but I couldn't. After I told her to stop saying it following every time she tried to say something about it she eventually gave up. Now, she had moved on from those choice words to simply saying cryptically, Everything is going to work out. I knew better than to bet against Alice but I daringly did so; I did not want to get my hopes up. She was so sure of this fact that her mood had taken a turn for the better, multiplied by three.

"Hello Alice," My less-happy self replied formally to her annoyance. She didn't understand how I couldn't believe her and why I wasn't as chipper as she was.

"Edward, everything—"

"Is going to work out. I know, Alice," I said monotonously, earning an impatient huff from the pixie.

Alice angrily muttered something incoherent and turned her attention back to the front of the classroom, though Mrs. Williams hadn't even arrived yet.

A presence to my right informed me of their entrance when they scraped the chair legs at the desk loudly and sat down. I growled lowly at who it was.

"Cullen," he acknowledged me. He had the audacity to act smug in front of me.

"Newton," I growled out. I had been trying to put as much of a distance as possible between Mike and myself but he wasn't making it easy right now or any other time when in passing he would mockingly asked 'where my girlfriend is'. Even now I had to fight the urge not to give him another black eye and so much worse. As much as I wanted to do that I would definitely get kicked out and I needed to stay-though to my displeasure-to get clean. It was the only thing that was keeping me going at this point, my freedom. And Mike seemed to enjoy waltzing right in and dangling it front of my face.

"What's got you down, eh?" he asked in mock sympathy. Like he didn't know that I hated the very ground he walked on for what he had tried and almost succeeded to do to Bella. I glared at him as he stared back with his arrogant smirk. His mood and actions were sure signs that he still hadn't quit the drugs. He knew I couldn't do anything to him with so many people around and he was taking full advantage of it. No, I had no patience for this jackass today…or ever for that matter. I darted my eyes to the front of the classroom to find that Mrs. Williams still hadn't arrived. With this opportunity, I moved my chair closer to Mike.

"Edward…" I could hear Alice warn. I ignored her.

Mike bravely stood his ground but I could see the fear lurking beneath his audacious façade. I surprised him when I grabbed a hold of his forearm forcibly. I knew he thought I wouldn't dare try to hurt him in here but he thought wrong. I applied enough pressure to turn my knuckles slightly white and that emotion of fear, which I had recognized previously, surfaced.

"Listen. Bella may not have wanted me to injure you further before but she isn't here now-as you have so kindly pointed out to me numerous times-and I have no problem in finishing what you started," I said deathly calm.

I removed my hand from his arm and returned back to my original position at my desk after giving Mike one final warning glare, which seemed to send him over the edge of terror.

"Boys." Alice muttered beside me while shaking her head.

As I ate my lunch in the cafeteria that day I was really missing the hospital food. At least they made some sort of effort to make the food edible there. If only Bella was here to go get me a cheeseburger, I mused. My neutral expression washed away to be replaced with a frown at the thought of her name.

Alice let out an impatient sigh across from me with narrowed eyes.

"Alice, leave him alone," Jasper said gently, voicing my request.

"Well, I can't stand seeing him depressed like every other kid in here. If he'd just listen to me, he'd know that there's nothing to be upset about."

"And how do you know?" Jasper inquired.

"I just know," Alice replied simply and seemed that Jasper believed her. I continued to look between the two as if a tennis match was taking place.

"Well, it's hard for him to—"

"Okay, I'm right here. You can at least acknowledge my presence," I said, annoyed.

"Sorry," they both said bashfully.

"And Alice, this is rehab. You cannot honestly except everyone to be so happy and go-lucky as you," I said coldly.

"I'm not asking for that, Edward, it just wouldn't hurt to see a little bit of hope from everyone around here," Alice said stiffly, narrowing her eyes further if that was at all possible. I opened my mouth to retort when she cut me off. "Have you even played the piano since Bella's leave?"

"Damn it, Alice!" I half-shouted as I stood up abruptly. Alice stood her ground, looking up at me with a clenched jaw. "Would you just keep your nose out of other people's business?"

"Edward," Jasper warned lowly.

"What?" I snapped.

"You need to cal—," he said.

"Do not tell me I need to calm down," I said menacingly.

As I stormed out of the cafeteria, Alice chose that time to speak up. "It's okay, Jasper, Edward is just a coward who won't face the truth," she said loudly. I chose to ignore it, knowing it would be in my better interest and that she was trying to get a rouse out of me to either come forward with what I was feeling or to finally accept what she was claiming; she had already half-succeeded.

I climbed the flight of stairs to my room, slamming the door behind me. I paced the room for a good five minutes, throwing things at the wall in my wake. When I came across the sheet music to her lullaby I paused. In my furious state I tore the paper up until it could be passed as confetti. There was no point in having it around any more, though I knew that I would always know the song down to the last note; I had it memorized.

When I gave up on being angry I slumped in defeat on my bed. I looked around at the mess I had caused. I was embarrassed to have lashed out like I did but I wouldn't lie and say it didn't feel good. I was still anxious, though, and so I stood up and went to the only thing that would calm me.

There it was in all its glory. Alice had made a point when she asked if I hadn't played since her leave from the Center. I couldn't believe I went so long. That was just the affect she had on me. I hadn't even entered the room after her last night; the room held too many memories.

Her showing me the room for the first time, me playing her lullaby for her, us sharing our first kiss, officially becoming boyfriend and girlfriend, and then there was that last night where I had confessed my true feelings for her. I was beginning to wonder if she had only said those words back because I had said them…but I couldn't see her doing that.

I sat down at the familiar piano bench and started playing whatever came to me first. I winced as that song happened to be her lullaby.

My fingers continued playing the now painful melody until the end. No matter what, though, it did calm me down. I let the last note reverberate throughout the room and then let my hands fall to my lap.

"Told ya," A voice said from the door. I jumped in fright from the sudden noise and turned around to find Alice smirking to Jasper. I rolled my eyes at the pair but a feeling of guilt washed over me as I remembered my earlier words and actions.

"I'm sorry, you two," I apologized quietly. "I was just upset."

"Really?" Alice asked sarcastically. I ignored this.

"I miss her," I sighed, voicing what I had been bottling up, "so much."

"We know. We know you still love her and that Bella loves you too," she said confidently, not noticing my small flinch at the sound of her name. I wanted to argue the latter of that sentence but Jasper spoke before I could.

"Just…let her have her way," he said.

"Ugh, I can't believe I behaved that rudely to you two when I really shouldn't be. You both are all I have left here," I said, running a hand through my hair.

"It's fine. We understand," Jasper interjected.

"Yeah, we realize you are just being an idiot, not wanting to face the fact that everything will fall into place eventually," Alice said brightly with an underlying tone daring me to disagree this time.

I sighed and leant my elbow on the piano keys- creating a mesh of notes to ring in the air- and rested my head on my hand. "All right, Alice," I conceded. "I believe you; everything's going to work out," quoting her words she had said so many times before. I refrained from rolling my eyes as I said it. But Alice was so confident when she was saying it that I couldn't help but to start consider it. I guess I would just have to trust her; she had been right before.

AN: So I tried showing just how messed up Edward is right now and so there you go. I don't think it was one of my better chapters but that just means the next one has to be better hopefully. He's having a rough go but he's starting to accept what Alice keeps persistently telling him (you know you shouldn't go against what Alice says). Next we'll go back to Bella, I believe.

Also, I'm not sure if Alice and Jasper will meet up with everyone in Forks…that just seems unreal (then again this is fanfiction) but they seem happy enough just two them already, don't they? I don't know; if I can think of a way for them to get to Forks I'll do it but if not… well yeah. Ideas in reviews/PM's maybe? :)