Disclaimer : I don't own it. I also don't own the idea of polar bear Ratchet's holoform, that's hummergrey's
Note : Bored Decepticon = Another avatar mischief chapter. Decepticon-centric. Inspired by hummergrey's 'If an Autobot, do NOT do the following'.
http: // www. fanfiction. net /u/ 237585 / (Just take out the spaces)
Note : I want to thank everyone for their patience and comments. I really appreciate your best wishes (and so odes my computer -computer transforms and starts giving everyone hugs-). my computer is being worked on, but as long as the crappy farm computer works, I figured I could update my stories. :)
I also realize that it was not a virus, but the 'scan' it was telling me I needed to do was. I didn't actually download it. I tried, but in my panic, I had closed all active pages and already disconnected from the internet, so I think I'm good.
Thanks again, everyone. I really hope you enjoy this chapter, I loved it and it even inspired a sequel chapter (coming up a little later) with Starscream as the lead role. ;)
P.S. : I have been trying to flipping update for the last 3 days, but for some reason it would not convert my files. -.-' -Sighs- Ah well, I'm baaaaaacccccckkkkk!
And I saw this gorgeous yellow Corvette the other day. It was the almost spitting image of what Sunstreaker would look like, if he was in the movie, only the wrong year. Unfortunately, all I got was a distant picture of it's car butt. LOL!
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
(Normal POV)
To say he was bored would be an understatement.
Ever since The Fallen had been defeated by the resurrected last living Prime, Optimus, Megatron had fallen back. He'd, as the humans would say, fallen off the face of the Earth, it seemed. Humans are such pathetic, odd creatures. He found himself thinking, grimacing as the saying ran through his processors. How can someone fall off the face of the planet?
Shaking his head mentally, he kept an eye out on the road, silently cycling his vents and forcing his holoform to shift a little, as a human would do. There had been no sign of Megatron's reappearance, and his last orders had been to attend to damages sustained in battle, and staying under cover for the time being. That's what he was doing, not that he was acting much like a police officer of the Earth laws.
Watching a swerving silver Corvette racing down the street, followed by a yellow search and rescue Hummer H2 that somehow managed to drive angry, he silently rolled back on his wheels, pausing when the window of the Corvette rolled down to reveal a caveman behind the wheel.
"It's so easy, even a caveman can do it!" He called out, driving off with a surprisingly evil cackle.
Blinking a moment, he smirked as he watched the window of the Hummer roll down, and a growling polar bear was seen in the driver's seat, waving an angry paw at the Corvette that ducked into heavier traffic.
That actually looks like fun.
He silently sat back and watched as many human vehicles swerved, some pulling cameras and phones out of practically nowhere in order to get pictures of the odd scene in front of them. Some were looking shocked, and one man took a long look at a large coffee cup he held, before dumping the remaining coffee out of it, and driving off.
With a low smirk, he began searching the worldwide web for images he could use. He searched their laws of physics, and some rather odd tales about strange creature sightings, his smirk growing larger and larger as he went. Then he activated his altered holoform and lights and took off after a speeder. Luckily, he tinted his windows, so no one could see what was inside the large car.
The person was seen sagging in their seat as the red Honda Civic slowly pulled over, and the window to the driver's side pulled down. Without even getting out of the 'car', he rolled up next to the car and rolled his own down, enjoying the way the human's eyes widened comically.
"Are you aware you were doing 75 in a 50 zone?" He asked, all business-like.
"Are you aware you're the freakin' Loch-Ness Monster??" The driver blurted out, his jaw dropping.
A long, green tail slid into the front seat, slithering around the headrest and the tip waving at the unhealthily pale human across from him. "So I've been told." Grabbing a notepad in his flippers, he managed to scribble out a ticket for more than was really necessary, and used his tail to easily hand it to the driver, who still looked shocked. "You take care now." With a smirk of his sort of dragonic face, he nodded, pulled his tail back, rolled up his window and drove away.
Still, he kept his audio sensors tuned to the car as he pulled behind a sign post.
It wasn't long before a phone was heard dialing.
"Holy hell, Will! I just got pulled over by the freaking Loch-Ness monster!! What? No, I didn't snort anything! I didn't smoke or drink anything, either! Seriously!!!! It was a cruiser with a giant...giant... A giant thing inside it!!" There was silence for a moment. "No, it was black and white, not blue... No, it didn't have that written on the side of-What? Well, excuse me! It's not every freaking day a giant lizard pulls you over, you know!"
Tuning him out, he stealthily sat back, chuckling to himself as he decided to play a little more with this human. He changed the coloring of his alternate form and watched as the guy seemed to nervously drive off, this time at a normal pace. Realizing a cop car was too conspicuous, he changed his form all together into a regular dark blue mustang, with tinted windows, and changed his holoform to match.
If the Auto-scum's medibot ever found out I stole this idea from him, I'd scrap myself. With a smirk, he drove off after the man, pulling up behind him at a red light and rolling down his window. The human never did roll his window up. "Excuse me." He altered his voice a little, and watched as the human looked over, then did a double take. "I was wondering if you had directions to the nearest beach?" He smiled as pleasantly as he could. "I'm new here and I'm a little lost."
A low sound escaped the shocked man's throat.
"I'm getting a little dried out." He hinted a little, struggling not to shake on his axles with his muffled laughter. "I really could use a drink."
With a small choke, the human pointed off towards a direction, before speeding off as the light changed.
"What?" Looking out his opposite window, he grinned at a woman turning the corner, who almost lost control of her car when she saw him. Feeling the slightest scrape on his bumper, he lost his grin and glared. "Watch it!" Waving a blue flipper, he balled it up into a fist, and snickered as the girl squealed and took off. He looked into his rear view mirror, and smirked as he saw the face of a giant dolphin staring back at him.
'Starscream to Barricade, what the slag are you doing?!'
Rolling his optics, Barricade cycled his vents and 'drove' off, keeping the dolphin holographic form in place as he went and watching as several people swerved, or spewed their drinks all over themselves. 'Relax, Starscream. I am not causing any trouble.'
'Then why am I already hearing reports of a black and white police cruiser with a.... 'Loch-Ness monster' driving it?'
Raising an optic ridge, he pulled over behind a building and changed back into his regular form. 'That was one flesh bag.' He grumped. 'One. And he doesn't know what I am.'
There was silence for a moment, before a snicker reached his audio sensors. Then he felt Starscream's presence and looked up, startling when a jet flew upside down over his head and he saw there was a giant.... He had to scan the worldwide web for this one... A giant strawberry sat inside, waving at him.
Blinking for a moment, Barricade smirked and chuckled. 'I always knew you were a little fruity.' He changed his alternate form again. This time he chose a rather famous character, his body growing larger than it should have been, sprouting hair all over, with elongated ears and bulging eyes. He then plastered the 'cutest' look he could on his face and started his engine, pulling into traffic with his tinted windows rolled up.
He remained half listening in on Starscream's channel, as the seeker found every human aircraft he could, and flew by in just such a manner, they saw his ridiculous form.
"Oh my God, you should see this pilot! He's a fruit!" One guy yelled.
"Well, yeah, he's probably a little unbalanced. Just be careful, you don't know what he's capable of."
"No, sir. I mean, he's a fruit! He's a giant fricken strawberry!"
There was silence on the other end of the line.
A snicker escaped Barricade, even as Starscream rolled in the air from laughing so much. Then he found himself a speeder on the edge of town, rapidly exiting said town. Seeing who it was, his snickers grew and he couldn't blame the poor man for trying so hard to get away, but... Switching on his sirens, he watched as the man glanced in the side mirror and visibly paled.
Still, perhaps it was morbid curiosity, but the human pulled over. As they were the only ones on the street, Barricade clumsily climbed out of the seat and hobbled forward, cursing mentally as he realized the form he chose wasn't very maneuverable He steadily ignored Starscream's roaring laughter overhead.
"This is the second time I've had to pull you over today, and you ran a red light earlier, sir. I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to step out of the car." Part of him wanted to cringe at how high and 'cute' the voice came out, even as the human stared at him with such wide eyes... How haven't they fallen out of their sockets, yet? "Now, please." Tilting his head to the side, he scratched one massive ear.
Slowly nodding, the fleshling turned off his car and stepped out, before turning his back to the car as Barricade walked over, did the standard pat down, and handcuffed him. "I'm going to be taking you in, do you understand? An officer at the precinct will read you your rights."
The ride was uneventful. It seemed the human didn't know what to say. He just kept staring, his mouth slightly agape. As they approached the precinct, however, he gasped at the sight before him.
William Lennox was standing next to a yellow Corvette, chatting with an officer.
Pulling to a stop, Barricade allowed the door to open of it's own accord and the handcuffs to dissolve into thin air, even as he spun in his seat and audibly growled at the human in the back. I'm not to take on the Autobot scum. He reminded himself, as he narrowed his oversized eyes at the man in the back. "Get out. Now."
Not having to be told twice, the man let out a rather girlish scream and raced out of the car.
"Will! Oh my God, Will! You'll never believe it! I was arrested by a mogwai!!"
Shaking on his axles, Barricade's alternate form returned to normal, he shut his own back door and slowly pulled away, not wanting to draw more attention to himself.
"Yeah, Gremlins! I was abducted by a freakin' Gremlin!!!!!!"
Barricade sped off, his laughter becoming too much at the sight of the other fleshbags' faces, and the suspicious rev of the engine of the Corvette next to them. That was more fun than I've had in a while. I'll have to do it again, sometime. He thought, already choosing to find and pick on that nameless man again.
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Note : I do not have an actual identity for the 'nameless man' or a relationship to Will, so you can make of it what you will.
Hope you like it.
R+R please.
Thank you.
Tenshi
