Whole Foods was the most likely place to find herbal stuff in Berk. Standing in the middle of the aisles, Astrid was hyper-aware of the comfortable weight of the hidden weapons she wore under her clothes. They pressed against her skin, familiar. She refused to fear the Fair Folk, no matter what Hiccup said or thought. She wanted to See. So she stalked up and down the aisles hunting for the ingredients she'd seen on that page of the journal.
Hiccup shadowed her. Since he was invisible to everyone else (and wasn't that just fantastic), she had to pretend she couldn't see him, but she watched him from the corners of her eyes. He looked thin and shadowed, the bright florescent lighting washing him out, leaving him paler than usual.
He'd had always been nervous and fidgety, but now that he'd told Astrid the truth about his Sight, it was different. Every flinch and twitch had meaning now: he was ignoring something unSeeable.
He'd always been bad at looking people straight on. His eyes slid away, not staring for too long, flickering here and there. Now, every time he did it, she had to stop herself from whipping around to stare, knowing there was something fey there. She wanted to know what he Saw.
I wonder how much longer I'll even be able to see him, she wondered as she turned a bottle of some spice over in her hands. Already, staying aware of him seemed an effort. If she let her mind wander, his presence faded away from all awareness until she forgot he was there. She didn't remember him until he spoke. She had to be careful not to start chattering at him in the middle of the grocery store. It was maddening.
"I can't believe my parents didn't have celery seed," she muttered to him out of the corner of her mouth. He shrugged.
His eyes slid sideways. "No. I don't know. Just put it back."
What is Jack doing? She wanted to ask but another customer was walking down the other side of the aisle, a middle-aged woman in a cardigan, ambling slowly as she perused the bins of bulk goods with a grocery list in-hand.
Astrid tried to focus on the endless rows of spice bottles with their little green labels. There were too many spices here; why did there have to be such a wide selection? She felt like she was reading the labels over and over again.
"Just stop touching things," hissed Hiccup. Astrid almost jumped. She glanced at him over her shoulder to see him looking very stressed. He pinched his mouth together and shook his head at her.
Astrid liked this Jack guy already. She smothered a grin and turned to the shelves again. Pumpkin spice…that was a thing they sold?…oregano…celery seed… wait, we need that one!
"Got it," she whispered, soft enough that the other woman in the aisle wouldn't hear.
Hiccup heaved a relieved sigh. "Thank god," he muttered.
Just then, a lever on one of the bulk bins went down — seemingly of its own accord — and organic pistachio nuts spilled everywhere. They piled up on the shelf underneath,then spilled over across the floor with little rat-a-tat-a-tat sounds, bouncing and shooting every which way across the fancy fake-rock texture ceramic tiles. The endless stream of nuts kept coming until the entire contained finally emptied itself out, and one final nut fell out, bounced off the pile, and went skittering away across the floor under the rest of the bins. Everything fell silent.
Astrid stared at the pistachios. The other woman in the aisle stared at them. Astrid looked up. The other woman stared at Astrid.
"'Sup," said Astrid. She tossed the woman a peace sign and power-walked away down the aisle, onward to the herbs and supplements section. Behind her, Hiccup was muttering very quickly into thin air. It was hard to tell, but he sounded both annoyed and amused.
"We'll meet you outside," he said, louder. He was gone almost before Astrid could nod at him, presumably taking Jack along with him. Astrid heaved a relieved sigh and continued her hunt for eyebright, orris root, and mugwort.
Next on the list was the four leaf clover. Astrid wound up crawling around on the lawn of Tam Lin Park on her hands and knees, peering at every little plant she could find that wasn't grass. It was hardly more than a cramped patch of grass next to a swingset, a slide, and a couple shabby picnic tables, but it was closest to her house and Berk had nothing better to offer. Her hands and knees grew covered in dirt and green stains. It was growing cold; she was glad she'd brought a sweater, even if it was getting filthy.
Where Hiccup sat, the grass was dry, brittle, and brown. She stared at it. Dead grass circled him; next to him there was a spot covered in glittering white frost. What the hell…was it like that before?
"Are you cold?" she asked him.
He shrugged. He was wearing his own hoodie that he'd taken from his house earlier. "I'm okay."
On the tiny playground a little ways off, several young mothers sat at a picnic table while their children crawled on the equipment. The mothers kept shooting Astrid weird looks, muttering among themselves. Astrid cast them a glare and turned her back on them.
Hiccup was building up a pile of ripped grass at his elbow. It stained his fingertips green. He glanced at Astrid. "Why are you scowling?"
"There's too many damn three leaf clovers." Astrid tossed yet another one away from herself, in the direction of the nosy suburban moms.
"I know," Hiccup agreed. His eyes flickered across the playground and turned downward.
Astrid felt the skin on her neck prickle and took a breath.
Hiccup focused back on her. "But there's going to be a four leaf. We'll find it."
"Who says? Jack?"
Hiccup snorted.
Astrid grinned at him. …those pistachios nuts… She smothered a laugh. She could imagine how hilarious it must have been for Jack, standing unSeen in the middle of them: the cause of the commotion but undetectable as the source, watching the astounded looks on their faces.
Between the three of them — two that Astrid could see — an aura of excitement permeated the air. She couldn't help the rising bubbling hope in her chest, even as she picked through bits of plants and dirt. Astrid would get to See, the same way Hiccup could. She couldn't wait. She wanted to meet Jack in the flesh.
Questions bubbled up inside her, so many questions. "Are all the fey friendly like Jack?"
"No! No. Nooooo." Hiccup looked horrified at the idea of it.
"Ah." Astrid frowned. "What are they like then?"
"Uhhhh…" Hiccup considered this, his eyes downcast so that the sunlight glanced over his face without illuminating what he was thinking. "Capricious," he said at last.
"What was the court like? Did you talk to any of them?"
"Er…Astrid." Hiccup dropped a handful of grass and wiped bits of leaves off his hands. "Listen. I know you think this is all very exciting, but…they're dangerous. You can't trust them. Ow." He rubbed his arm and glared off into space at Astrid's left. "Okay, you can't trust most of them."
"I think I can handle it."
"I mean, sure you probably can. You're Astrid. But…do you remember Heather? Heather Snarkson?"
"What?" Astrid had never heard that name in her life. "No. Who-?"
"She was in our class. She sat next to you in bio. You were friends with her, Astrid."
"Okay, now you're just-"
"The fey took her."
A cloud passed over the sun. A breeze swept through the trees around the park, rustling the branches and sending down a shower of dead leaves.
"A few months ago, and everyone in Berk forgot she even existed or was ever here. They just do that sometimes. They take people."
"That's-" Astrid's mouth was dry; she licked her lips with a nervous tongue. "They can't just-"
"They do." Hiccup's voice went hard. "What do you think happened to my mother?" He looked away from her, down at his hands in his lap, absent-mindedly running his fingers through the lawn again.
Oh my god. Valka was… Astrid swallowed. "But why?"
"For fun. They're not human. Most of them have no concept of morals or empathy."
They won't get me though. Astrid's gaze strayed into the space where she knew Jack was sitting, where the grass was frosty white. "What about your faery? Jack?"
A soft, fond look came into Hiccup's eyes. "More human than most."
Does he like…oh my god. Ohhhh my god, he likes the faery. Astrid let this pass without comment since she knew Jack was there, but she made a mental note to absolutely drill Hiccup about it later as soon as she knew they were truly alone. "Uh-huuuuuh," she said out loud.
"Find any four leaf ones yet?" said Hiccup quickly.
Astrid sighed. "No," she admitted. "Nothing yet." A man walking his tiny chihuahua past the park stopped in the middle of the sidewalk to give her a strange look for talking to herself. Astrid stared back at him. "What?" she demanded when he didn't immediately say anything.
"Don't you have school?" he asked.
"No." She glared at him until he tugged on his dog's leash and scurried away. "And mind your own business!" Annoyed, she ripped up a handful of the lawn without checking it and threw it after him. As the little bits and pieces of vegetation flew through the air, she spotted a clover in the middle of it. "Ah!" Her shout startled Hiccup. She dove for the clover and grabbed it before it became lost on the ground again, clutching it between her fingers. "Got one! Yes!" Excited, she punched Hiccup's arm with her free hand.
"Finally." Hiccup rubbed his arm, smiling.
When they drove back to her house, they found Jack's little messenger fey waiting for them on the front porch. Hiccup grabbed Astrid's arm to stop her before she barreled it over on her way to the door.
It bowed low at their approach and held out its hand. A large speckled mushroom rested on its palm between curled fingers. "Your mushroom, my lord," it said to Hiccup, peeping up at him.
"Uh." Hiccup sputtered and turned red.
Jack stepped in front of him. He bowed back to the fey. "He is grateful for your service." Behind his back, his hand flapped at Hiccup. Hiccup clamped his mouth shut.
The little fey bowed deeply again, almost falling over in its enthusiasm. "I am happy to provide it." It seemed very pleased with itself as it flew off again and disappeared beyond the gate.
"Why is he calling me that?" Hiccup muttered. He gave Jack a desolate look and motioned for Astrid to unlock the door. Jack handed the mushroom over to Hiccup, who in turn passed it to Astrid. "We have our special mushroom," he told her.
She raised her eyebrows at it. "Oh, is that what just happened."
"I told you, there have been, um, rumors." Jack answered Hiccup's question. He pursed his lips and looked away.
They trailed after Astrid into her house again. She parked them at the kitchen island. "Wait a second." She disappeared out the back door. A few moments of silence passed.
"Do you think this will work?" Jack whispered.
Hiccup glanced up at him; Jack looked thin and worn down, dark circles under his eyes, hair drooping over his forehead, skin greyish from being exposed to so much human metal. "…yeah," said Hiccup. "Of course it will work."
Jack's mouth twisted and he opened it to say something, but Astrid interrupted him as she barged back in through the door.
"Okay," she announced. She set down a glass jar half full of greyish water, little bits of leaves swirling around the bottom of it. "Rainwater from the bird bath. I think we have almost everything." Hands on her hips, she surveyed everything they had collected, laid out across the marble countertop: the celery seed, orris root, eyebright, mugwort, their crumpled four-leaf clover, the mushroom, the rainwater. "We're just missing the stone thing. I checked google. Did you know that you can order witch stones from people? They say they're real, but either way it would take almost a week to get one sent here, and I don't know where in Berk to find one naturally." As she was talking, she pulled an egg out, cracked it into a cup, and put the innards of it back into the fridge.
"We don't have enough time for that," said Jack, blanching. He leaned against the island and scraped a hand through his hair. The unsaid threat loomed over them: Pitch is coming…
"We'll do it without the stone," said Hiccup firmly. "It'll be fine."
Astrid was rifling through cabinets with a great deal of banging and clanging.
Every glass container that the Hoffersons' owned appeared on the island: mason jars, Pyrex measuring cups, glass bowls. Astrid pulled her hair back and they opened the bottles that they'd gotten from Whole Foods, cracked open the capsules for eyebright and mugwort, carefully sliced off a portion of the mushroom. They poured off the top of the rainwater that was clearest into a Pyrex and boiled in the microwave. Jack watched them with his fingers holding one eye open, slowly coaxing the eye to water.
"I think we're ready for you," Hiccup whispered to Jack. Between he and Astrid on the island counter was the Pyrex of potion, a simmering cloudy grey.
Jack caught a couple tears on the tips of his fingers and shook them into it. It hissed a little, remaining the same color. They all stared at it. "What now?" asked Jack. "It's too early to actually use it." It was still light outside, late afternoon; the sun was still up.
The distinct sound of tires on the gravel driveway alerted them to an approaching car. "Ah, fuck, someone's home." Astrid's eyes darted around and she shoved the potion into the nearest cupboard. "Go upstairs, we'll do this later." She shooed them both toward the stairs as she went to the front door.
Jack and Hiccup fled upstairs. Behind them they heard the door open, then the voice of Astrid's mother. "Oh, you're home, sweetie. Did you already do your homework? Here, I brought takeout, I'll leave you some in the fridge. I can't stay around, I have to—"
Hiccup shut the room to Astrid's door with a click and the voice became too muffled to understand anymore.
"Is she gonna leave again?" Jack stood in the middle of the room turning around for a second, restless with impatience, then bounced off the edge of Astrid's bed and let himself drift to the ceiling.
Hiccup felt restless too; he went to window and stared down at the new car in the driveway. "Sounded like it. Astrid's parents are never around much. They really just sleep here."
"That's why Astrid is so lonely," said Jack from the ceiling.
Hiccup's craned his neck to look at him.
Jack seemed to read his expression and shrugged upside down. "I watched her too, sometimes. Mostly because she's your friend. But I like her too."
"I know," said Hiccup. "I just didn't realize you were so…"
"Perceptive?"
"I guess." He turned away. They fell silent.
Astrid's mother came and went, but before they could creep downstairs again, Astrid's father pulled in. For a little while they could hear him downstairs, every once in awhile saying something to Astrid. The house fell quiet; the shadows grew long against the orange sunset light. As the light was disappearing into blue-grey gloom, footsteps came up the stairs and continued on past them down the hall. A minute later Astrid was cracking open the door.
"Finally," she said, motioning them out. "Just in time. I thought he was never going to go to sleep, he took forever. Come on."
They moved with only illumination from the overhead sink light to guide them as they gathered around the kitchen island again. Their faces, swimming in the darkening reflection of the window over the sink, looked ghostly. Hiccup's freckles stood out stark against his skin.
Jack hovered around Astrid, not seeming to know what to do with himself, until he finally settled down on a stool right across from her, twisting his hands in his hoodie pockets.
Astrid licked her lips and tapped the edge of the Pyrex dish. "Here goes nothing."
They all held their breath as she dipped one finger into the liquid, wiped it on the edge of her lower eyelids - one eye and then the other. She blinked several times, looked around. Her mouth twisted up into a moue of confusion.
"Maybe…maybe it takes time to work?" Jack's voice trembled in the air and hung there for several threatening seconds.
"I don't See anything," said Astrid. Her voice, too, was tight and nervous.
Hiccup looked between them. Astrid's eyes were wandering, desperate and seeking, but still going straight through Jack as though he were nothing but a ghost. Jack stared back at her with his mouth pressed into a thin line.
There was a sinking, constricting feeling in Hiccup's chest. "It didn't work." His voice sounded defeated. "We didn't have the witch stone."
For a moment, no one moved.
Astrid rammed her fist against the marble countertop. "Damn it!" she shouted. Jack and Hiccup both jumped. She swung around and left, punching the door frame on her way out, hard enough to leave small dents in the wood where her knuckles collided. "Ugh!" She stomped upstairs and slammed her bedroom door.
Hiccup didn't follow her. He knew better. She needed a little time to cool off; then she would rant and rave, talk to him, they'd work something out and both feel better. Right now he felt sick.
He buried his eyes against his palms with a tired sigh.
There was so little time left. It felt like he was always running from it, running out of it, running with an ending snapping at his heels — yet they always seemed to be waiting for things. Now they would have to wait for a witch stone, and start everything over again. There wasn't enough time. How was he supposed to help Jack like this? Just him? The only one who could See? He'd tried once and failed. He'd just tried once more and failed again. What now? He couldn't do anything. He was only Hiccup. Only human.
"I'm sorry." He looked up, but no one answered him. The sun had gone down. It was completely dark now; he was alone in the silent, empty kitchen. When did Jack leave? Hiccup hadn't even noticed him going. The glowing microwave clock read 8:24; he'd been sitting there for over an hour. Time had slipped away.
I can't do this…
Moving with slow, tired movements, Hiccup stood up and crept upstairs. When he cracked open the door to Astrid's room, she was already in bed, either asleep or faking it. He pulled off his shoes, slipped in under the covers next to her, curled up with his forehead resting against her back. Despite his breathing slowing to match hers, deep and even, it took him a long time to fall asleep. And in the time in between, he stared open-eyed into the darkness, wondering where Jack had gone, wondering where Toothless was.