I walked through the hall and into Sab's room. Well, Sab's old room. He was gone. At that boarding school. Anna was at my mom's house. And Elliot was at school. Eli was at work.

And I'm all alone.

I couldn't handle anything anymore. I kept fearing that Eli would hurt me; he always did so just when he was acting nice. Before, one of my escapes was sleep, but those are just full of nightmares. I haven't slept for 2 days.

I tried to watch TV, but I ended up settling to sleep. I was hoping no nightmares would happen but I did have one memory.

"Everything is taken care of, so just relax. Sab's at my mom's and we're here. Just enjoy yourself." He whispers in my ear. It's our honeymoon and Eli had got us a room at a fancy hotel in north New York. We were standing in an elevator and Eli had his hands on my waist. "Okay..." I respond softly. When the doors open, Eli takes my hand and leads me down the hall, reading out the room numbers, "436, 438, 440, hey 442!" He says, pulling out his room card.

For the past 2 weeks, Eli hadn't even attempted to rape me, saying that our honeymoon would be more special is we hadn't had sex for a while. It just made me scared.

Eli pushes the door open and sees our luggage that the bellboy had dropped off. I explore the room and hear Eli come up behind me. He places his hands on my waist and begins to kiss my neck. I tense up and pull away from him. His eyes darken and he growls at me, "What are you doing?"

"I-I-" His eyes relax, "Oh, yeah! Wait a second..." He pulls open his suitcase and reveals a shopping bag, "I got this for you." He says and hands me the bag. I frown at what's inside and pull it out. Lingerie. A white lace Chemise. I look up at Eli, who's smiling, "Do you like it? It took me an hour to choose it out." I nod, "I'll, uh, go put it on." I go into the restroom and slip into the small lace.

I walk outside, feeling extremely nervous and exposed. He steps forward and smirks, "You're beautiful." He says and wraps his arms around me. "Eli, maybe we should-" He cuts me off by turning off the lights and closing the curtains so it was pitch black. I froze and shuddered, not being able to see him. Suddenly, I felt his lips against my neck and his hands on my waist. He moved me back until I fell onto the bed and was being kissed and groped.

"Eli...Eli, stop." I whispered. He stopped, for a moment, and asked, "It's our honeymoon, okay? We're supposed to have sex." I try to push him off me, but he spread his legs and kept me pinned. "I don't want to..." I beg. He laid back on top of me and kissed my neck, "I do. Just go with it." He assured and sits up, "Take my shirt off." He commanded. I gulped and slipped his shirt over his head.

"Massage me. Down there." He grabbed my hand and placed it on his crotch. I could feel tears falling down my face as I unwillingly touched him.

I woke up covered in sweat and tears. Our honeymoon had been horrible and I hated to remember it. I felt a soothing hand on my back, rubbing circles. I looked up at Eli, who's sitting on the edge of the bed. "Eli?" I mutter. "Hey, Love. Sit up." I do as he says and rub my eyes.

"Aren't you supposed to be at work?" I asks. He shrugs, "Nah. I quit." He says, nonchalantly. "You quit your job?!" I cry. He burst out laughing, "No, I'm just using my vacation time. I'm gonna make sure you get better."

I nodded slowly. "Yup. I really want this marriage to work. And with Sab away, I think it could. And maybe we could all relax a little." I nodded, "Alright. So, um, what should we do during your vacation?"

He shrugged, "Whatever's fun. We could go see a movie or something." I stood up and go to the kitchen where I pour myself and Eli a glass of wine, "Let's just stay home and watch some TV. He shrugged and took the wine, "Fine by me."

2 movies and several glasses of wine later, I was leaning against Eli and rubbing small circles on his thigh.. Eli kept pushing me back and trying to get me to focus on the movie, but instead, I kissed him. "Elijah..." I whispered. He ignored me. "Eli, I'm sleepy" He stood up and helped me to the bedroom.

"I can hardly believe you're tired. At this hour." Eli muttered, "You're only acting like this because you're drunk. If you were sober, you wouldn't be touching me." He pulled my hand from his chest, "Go to sleep."

Hours later, the phone rang, though neither of us got up to answer it. I turned over and shook Eli, "Get the phone..." I groaned. "No, you get it." I sat up, rubbing my head, "I don't want to. Just let it ring."

I groaned again and stood up, "My head hurts. I'll get it, lazy-ass." He chuckled in response. I picked up the phone, "Hello?"

"Clare, Elliot was wondering if he could spend the night here. No one picked him up from school, so he walked to our house." Her tone was disapproving.

"Oh my Go-gosh..." I muttered, "We fell asleep I'm so sorry, mom. If it's fine with you, he can stay the night. How's Anna?" I asked, sitting on the couch. "She's fine. She misses you, of course, but she's doing fine. Have you heard from Sebastian?"

"No. He's still mad at us for sending him away. Wait a moment." I walked outside and spoke softly into the phone, "I tried to talk to Eli about it, but he likes acting all powerful...I don't know. He worries me, sometimes."

"Clare, you know we would all understand if you got a divorce, right?" I sat down in the front step, "I know...He's-we're trying to fix our marriage. We'll work out; I'm sure of it." I knew my words were dishonest

"Does he still hurt you?" I bit my lip, knowing I had to lie, "No, he hasn't in a while, mom. He's better. We're better. We just watched a couple of movies, had a drink and slept." Helen sighed, "And that's why you couldn't pick up Elliot?" I wiped my eyes, "I'm sorry, mom. I just...we're trying to fix our relationship. He's trying really hard, mom. He's just like the Eli from high school."

"Okay, Clare. If you ever need a place to stay, just come home. You're always welcome." I smiled, "Bye, mom." I hung up and walked back inside. Eli was still laying in bed, now shirtless. "Hey, Clare." He said, though his eyes were closed. "Hey. I don't feel good."

He hummed, "Welcome to the club." I laid down and snuggled against him, "Make me feel better. Get me some aspirin." He chuckled, "It's too far away." He teased

I groaned and turned over to face him, "Please, Eli..." He stood up and opened his drawer. He shuffled through it and finally pulled his hand out, holding a little pill.

"Do you want this?" I nodded and reached for it., swallowing without water. Eli took two of them.

Laying down, I closed my eyes and soon feel Eli beside me, "How do you feel?" I hummed softly, "A little better." We cuddled for an hour, half awake, half asleep.

"Uhh, okay. What do you wanna do?" I shrugged "I dunno...you...?" He stood up slowly, "I'm gonna go grocery shopping...we are low on some stuff."

"Pick up lunch meat. And milk and fruit." He smirked lazily, "I can do that."