As soon as the plane touched down in London, Rebekah felt her stomach being to twist and tighten with nerves. It had been a pleasant flight, all things considered. Certainly the luxury of Ted's private jet had more than a little to do with it, but in spite of that she couldn't help noticing a softening of his attitude towards her. He had chatted to her on neutral subjects during the time she had been unable to sleep, his demeanor showing no sign of his earlier anger or resentment. She wondered if it was for the benefit of his attentive staff or whether he was genuinely trying to put the past aside and build a bridge of friendship with her.
She couldn't help but wonder how older woman would receive her, especially since Rebekah had kept the existence of her only grandchild a secret. She also couldn't help wondering how Ted had explained his hasty marriage. His mother was too astute to be fooled into thinking it was a love match. Melanie was close to her son and would soon see for herself the cracks in his relationship with his new wife.
"Are we dere yet?" Emily asked with a sleep yawn as their luggage was put into an awaiting car.
"No quite, darling." Rebekah said, cuddling her close.
Ted met her eyes briefly and he gave her one of his slow smiles. "Would you like me to hold her for you?" He offered. "You look tired."
"Okay, thanks." She handed Emily to him, her hands brushing against his. She felt the exchange of sexual energy and her skin began to tighten all over in reaction.
"My mother will be thrilled to see Emily." He said as she stroked his daughter's sleepy head where it was resting against his shoulder. "You have no need to be concerned over anything else."
She gnawed at her lip without answering.
"Truly, Rebekah." He assured her. "The past is not going to be mentioned while we are here."
"That doesn't mean it's going to go away." She said as they got into the car.
Ted watched as she moved towards the car, her shoulders bowed with exhaustion, her blond hair falling in cascading waves about her shoulders, the normally smooth creamy skin of her face now looking pinched and white.
He felt something catch in his chest, like a small sharp tug on the feelings he had locked away four years ago. Although he hadn't told her he had loved her in so many words, her bubbly nature and enthusiasm for life had been so refreshing. She had captivated him from the very first moment their eyes had met across a crowded restaurant. He had felt a connection that had been instant, electric and enthralling and, even now, in spite of what she had done, he could still feel it beating like a pulse deep inside him. Maybe she was right the past was not going to go away. It would stay with them like a menacing presence, casting a long dark shadow of uncertainty over their lives….
Melanie was waiting for them in the doorway, her arms outstretched for Emily who had not long ago woken up.
"Are you my granny?"
Rebekah saw the bright tears in Ted's mother's eyes as she reached for her only grandchild and felt a lump come to her already tight throat.
"Oh, my darling one." The older woman crooned, her voice breaking over the words. "You are the image of Kelly."
Ted smiled and bent down to kiss his mother. "She is a beautiful child, Mama."
Melanie turned her dark brown eyes to Rebekah, her expression warm and welcoming. "It is good to see you, Rebekah. I am so glad you are here and a part of our family."
Rebekah found it hard to know what to say in response. She stretched her lips into a smile and offered a hand but Melanie ignored it to press a soft kiss to both of her cheeks, with Emily still locked in her embrace.
"It's good to be here again…" She mumbled.
Emily rubbed at her eyes. "Do you want to see my special toys?" She asked her grandmother.
Melanie's eyes brightened. "I would love to see your special toys. Did you bring them all this way with you?"
"Mommy wasn't going to let me, but Daddy said I could." Emily said with a borderline reproachful glance in Rebekah's direction.
"I am sure you mommy was worried about your things taking up too much room." Melanie said graciously.
"Do you have a swimming pool?" Emily asked as she slipped her tiny hand into her grandmother's outstretched one.
"Yes, we do." Melanie smiled. "Would you like to see it?"
Emily turned to Rebekah with a beseeching look. "Can I Mommy?"
Rebekah nodded, her face cracking on a smile, "Of course you can."
"Can you swim?" Emily asked her grandmother as they made their way through the house to the sun-drenched terrace outside.
"But of course." Melanie replied. "Can you?"
"Only a little bit." Emily confessed as her thumb began to move toward her mouth. "Mommy has been taking me to lessons but I'm not berry good."
Ted turned to Rebekah once they had gone, his expression softened with concern. "Are you all right? You look very pale."
"I don't know why I feel so exhausted." She said, rubbing the center of her forehead. "Maybe it's the heat. Would you mind if I lie down for a while?"
"Of course not." He said with another one of his rarely used smiles. "My mother will relish this opportunity to get to know her granddaughter."
"If Emily needs me, please wake me up." Rebekah said a few minutes later when Ted had shown her to their room.
"Do not worry about her." He said as he pulled a cool sheet over her. "She will undoubtedly soon crash from jet lag just as you are doing now."
"I never used to suffer from jet lag." She said as she brought a hand up to cover her aching eyes. "I used to trip between time zones without a problem."
"You have been working hard for the last few weeks."
"Yes..." Her soft sigh deflated her chest as she nestled into the pillows and closed her eyes. "I guess you're right...It's been one hell of a month…"
"If you do not feel up to joining us for dinner do not worry." He said. "I can get the housekeeper to bring something up to your room."
Rebekah felt her stomach shrink away at the thought of food and buried her head further into the soft-as-air pillow. "I'm not hungry…"
"My mother is the happiest I have seen her in two years." He said after a long silence.
She opened her eyes to look at him. "I'm glad…I really am…"
"The loss of a child is huge in a mother's life." He said, looking down at his hands for a moment before bringing his blue, unreadable eyes back to hers. "I hope you will forgive me for threatening to take Emily from you. If things do not work out between us, I will try to ensure she has regular contact with you."
"Thank you…." She murmured, wondering if she could trust him to keep his word.
"You have been a good mother to her." He said. "Do not be hurt by her occasional divided loyal ties. It is understandable that she will be trying to work out who is now in charge. Children do that in order to feel secure; there is nothing personal in it, I am sure."
"I could never afford the toys you've bought for her." She said, not quite able to remove the hint of resentment in her tone.
He put his hand on her shoulder, the warmth of his palm seeping through her skin like a brand. "I am only trying to make up for lost time. The things I buy for her are not bribes to win her away from you."
Rebekah did nothing to hide the cynicism in her eyes as they connected with his. "I can't compete with overseas holidays and expensive gifts. I can only give her myself."
His hand dropped from her shoulder as his expression tightened. "You at least have had that opportunity for the last three years. I have not."
She buried her head into the pillow, her voice sounding muffled as she spoke. "Please close the door. I don't want to be disturbed."
"I do not like it when you turn away from me when I am speaking to you."
"Get over it."
She heard his indrawn breath, his anger at her curt dismissal pulsing in the air. "Look at me, Rebekah." He commanded.
She flipped over to her back to fling him a frosty look. "Just because we're married doesn't mean you can order me about all the time. If you wanted a complaint wife, then you should have married someone of your own culture. No doubt they would have sat at your feet licking your boots in subservience. If I don't want to look at you, I won't and there is nothing you can do to make me."
His eyes flickered with fury at her mutinous glare, his hand in tight knots by his sides as he ground out. "You are the most maddening woman I have ever met. I am trying to bring about peace in our relationship and yet you consistently resist all of my attempts to effect a truce."
Her eyes flashed back at him. "I don't trust you, that's why. For all I know, you could be leading me up the garden path, making me fall in love with you all over again before you snatch Emily away from me."
"It is not my intention to have you fall in love with me."
Rebekah felt her anger draining away to make room for her disappointment. She felt it gradually filling her chest until she could scarcely breathe from the weight of it. She fought hard to hide it from him, schooling her features into bland indifference. "Good, then at least you won't be setting yourself up for disappointment. So what happens then?"
"We will deal with that when it happens." He answered evenly.
"Are you talking weeks or months or years?"
His blue eyes were as unfathomable as ever as they held on to hers. "I would hazard a guess and say it could take some time for me to flush you out of my system."
She rolled her eyes in disdain. "You make me sound like some sort of unpleasant stomach virus."
His mouth stretched into an unwilling smile. "That is indeed what it feels like at times." He conceded.
"Yeah, well, you're more or less a major pain in the rear end for me too." she tossed back.
He was still smiling. "I will come in later to check on you."
She turned her head back into the pillow. "Don't bother."
"It is no bother; beside, my mother will suspect something is wrong if I do not act like a devoted husband. She is delighted we are together again."
Rebekah lifted her head out of the downy pillow to look at him. "Why? Has she suddenly changed her mind about what happened four years ago?"
"This may surprise you, but my mother always found it difficult to believe you were responsible."
She hunted his expression, hoping for some sign of his own belief in her innocence, but as far as she could tell there was none. The blade of his gaze relentlessly dissected hers until she was the first to look away.
"What a pity she wasn't able to convince you of the same." She said, looking down at her hands where they were twisting the hem of the sheet covering her.
The silence stretched and stretched until it was finally broken by the slow release of his sigh.
"Yes." He said as her eyes slowly came back to his. "Yes, perhaps it is."
She ran her tongue over the parchment of her lips. "Ted…."
He reached out with a fingertip and pressed her mouth closed. "No more talking of the past, Rebekah."
He gave her a crooked smile and bending down, replaced his finger with his mouth in a soft brush-like kiss that made her lips cling momentarily to his as he pulled away.
She watched as he moved to the door, the words to call him back locked in the middle of her throat. What would be the point in telling him she loved him? It wasn't what he wanted from her. Not now, not again, not ever.
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