Chapter 20

Disclaimer- I own nothing!

That can't be right can it? Can the calendar really be reading December first already? Couldn't time slow down even for a little while?
"Daddy!" Looking around the bed he saw Emma running in their room, seemed someone was up from her nap.
"Hello princess, sleep well."
"Daddy up!" She stood next to him looking up at him on the bed.
"Up; why does daddy have to get up? You want to play already?"
"Daddy up!" Seeing Tamaki walking over to help he noticed Emma starting crying when he lifted her up, obviously she didn't like that too much.
"Well I see who you love more."
"What do you want Em I'm right here?"
He couldn't lift her, not if she wanted him up. He should be happy to be out of bed since Akito hadn't gotten all of the fluid out of his lungs yet, it was something he couldn't fix in a few days even if he wasn't sick. Still, he missed having the ability to carry his daughter around.
"She wants to show you something and have you do something with us."
Grabbing her father's hand once Tamaki placed her back down she walked with him as he made his way down the hall. Stopping at the door they had their dining room table in he waited for Tamaki to come around and open it for them. Again the room had been moved around. Now though there was a giant Christmas tree in the room which pushed the table over more towards the wall.
"I know we haven't discussed Christmas yet but I was told the perfect tree was found and so I had it brought over. What do you think, beautiful or what?"
"Well it's something else." Emma let go of his hand to start running around it with Alice excited for the giant new object in the house. "Oh fantastic, someone has indoor plumbing." Kyouya cracked a smile as his own joke while Tamaki started laughing.
"Care to help us decorate it? I thought it would be fun to do it ourselves for once instead of the maids."
"Sure but I'm not sure how well I can."
"If you want you can hand stuff to us. The box is right there and I think Emma is up to running back and forth." That did sound like a better idea. Sitting he opened the box to see the different decorations they had, he had no idea they had so much just for a tree.

"Here momma." Emma ran back to Tamaki holding another ornament after they got the lights on. He forgot that would probably take two people but Kyouya seemed okay to do it and actually laughed as they worked together to figure out how to get them up.
"Huh well look at that."
"What's up Kyouya?" Sneaking out from behind the tree he saw Kyouya looking at something in his hands. Emma was trying to get him to show her.
"It's the ornament your mother made for us when we first got married."
"That's funny, I forgot about it too since we've never done this before. Is the one she made for Emma in there too?"
"Probably." Digging around he found the one they were looking for.
"Look Emma this one yours; see it has your name on it. Do you want to hang it up?" Picking her up Tamaki brought her over to the front of the tree. "Put it right on there. Put this part here right on the branch. Good girl. Perfect. Don't you think so daddy?" Turning around he realized he wasn't in the chair anymore. Feeling a hand on his back he noticed he was beside them.
"It's close to perfect but not yet. It's still missing something." Adding the one he was holding, the one they got the year of their wedding, he placed it next to Emma's. "Now it is."

Kyouya rolled over believing he was hearing talking. Who the hell was Tamaki talking to this early in the morning? Sitting up Tamaki must have seen the questioned look on his face as he moved the phone from his mouth and whispered, "My mother."
"Now?" Seeing the time he realized he slept in later than he had in months, it was a quarter after ten. How did that happen, usually Akito did everything around eight-thirty.
"Yea I don't know we haven't talked about it yet. Well he's up now so why don't I call you back in a little bit…love you too mother. Talk to you soon." Hanging up he moved closer to Kyouya happy he was finally up. Akito had decided to let him sleep seeing how tired he had been. Both could see the heavy bags under his eyes and neither wanted him to collapse from exhaustion.
"So what did your mother want? And how did I sleep in so late? Don't tell me I was out cold when Akito came in."
"No that's not it; he saw how exhausted you looked and how peaceful you looked sleeping so he left you. He said he could just do everything later."
"Well then why have I been waking up so early all this time? I would have loved to sleep in."
Tamaki shrugged his shoulders before getting even closer. "My mother called about Christmas. She wanted to know our plans for the day."
"About that. I know you love having your family over for it but I would rather have it be just us. Maybe have them come after dinner."
"Sure if you want to do that than I'm fine with it. It will just be the three of us. Do you want to see if your father wants to come over that night as well? I know Akito is going to be with his wife so I don't know if they will do it but your father might."
"We could ask him, maybe Fuyumi will accept that idea and not hound me like she did for my birthday."
"I love your sister but she is a little over protective of you."
"You're telling me."
Together they stayed in bed a little while longer enjoying each other's company. These moments were hard to forget that they wouldn't last forever. The clock was ticking to the day they would say good-bye and neither were prepared for it. The day they were was the day it all became real and became final.

Kyouya couldn't help but smile at his daughter as he sat on the floor with her between him and Tamaki Christmas morning. Watching her face light up as they helped her open her presents, Christmas was their excuse to spoil her horribly, not that didn't every day, but now they had another reason to, other than she was simply adorable. She was giggling as she handed Alice a giant bone twice her size and watched as her tail spun around in excitement. Seeing the smile on Kyouya's face while he watched Emma's playing with the wrapping paper made Tamaki's smile grow wider. Suddenly remembering what he wanted to do he reached over to hand a giant box over to Kyouya.
"What's this?"
"What do you think? Go on and open it. I came across it the other week and I thought how perfect it was for you."
Reaching over Kyouya grabbed a box for Tamaki as well since it seemed they were doing this now.
"What's this?"
"I was looking at something the other week and came across it. It screamed at me that you would love it."
"But I already have everything I could love right here I have you and Emma what else could I need?"
"Just open it. Jeez you can be so hard to deal with at times."
"Together."
"Okay Tamaki, together than."
Both looked at the present on their laps. Tamaki's hands quivered at the sight of what Kyouya gave him and he hadn't even opened it all the way.
"Kyouya…"
"Take a look inside, I bet you'll like it."
Opening the cover he flipped through the pages of pictures. It was an album of them.
"It goes in order from when we first started dating to recent. That's why the covers on all the books are different, so you can tell the difference of what's inside. I came across the giant box you have of pictures in the closet so I organized them all for you."
"How was I never around to see you doing this? I mean I had at least a thousand pictures in that box."
"My little secret. Do you like it though?"
"I love it thank you. One question, why is this one empty?"
"That is so you can pick up where I left off. I'm sure you'll take much more in the coming years and I'm making sure you don't let them go for as long. Emma is just under two and half years I'm sure you'll have another hundred taken in no time."
Tamaki fought back tears as he moved close to the incredible person he was married to lips. He stopped just short seeing Kyouya hadn't finished opening the gift he gave him yet.
"Please finish I want to see if you like it. I came across it and instantly thought of you."
Seeing Tamaki wasn't going to follow through with his kiss he went back to the large box he was holding on his lap. It wasn't heavy at all, not the way the one he gave Tamaki was.
'What the…?" It was a giant art supply kit. Tamaki was truly too much.
"Do you like it? I noticed the ones you were using were low and your sketchbook was basically full. I was hoping that maybe with new tools you could pick it up again. You know I love the things you've made." This time Kyouya moved closer to Tamaki only he made sure he followed through with it.
"God I love you, much more than I could ever say." Tamaki made sure not to cry and end this moment. Hearing Kyouya's words made his heart skip a beat. He may not have the words but he could feel Kyouya's love for him pouring out. They separated as they felt Emma standing beside them.
"You want a kiss too, okay then come here my little princess." Tamaki wrapped his arms around her as he kissed her forehead. Kyouya smiled as she laughed at what her mother was doing to her, her laughter was that of an angel, just as her smile was. Yes, he was sure of it now, they would be just fine once he was gone.

Around seven both of their families showed up for a little while. It was nice to spend time with everyone again; they hadn't been all together like this since Emma's birthday. Both were slightly surprised to see Akito and his wife arrive with everyone. They figured they would stay home since he had been here since September. Tamaki noticed Kyouya was talking to Yoshio in the far corner. They looked to be having a normal conversation; Yoshio didn't call too often if he was remembering correctly. Not that it didn't mean it wasn't Kyouya's decision and leaving it to Akito to keep him up to date he just knew Yoshio never called the house much.
"You're looking well Kyouya, all things considered."
"I try, it's easier some days than others but I try."
"And Akito, are you alright with what he's been doing?"
"I have no complaints. I can imagine this isn't easy on him. He is doing well all the same."
"That is good to hear. Your brothers have excelled just as you have. I want you to know that. I know I pushed you extremely hard while you were younger but know I am very proud of who've you become and all you have done."
Kyouya didn't know what to say, this wasn't like the father he knew growing up at all. God this only further proved how bad things looked for him.
"You seem more at ease with yourself, have you been able to come to terms with what's happening?"
"I have. I took your advice and made those albums of my time together with Tamaki and Emma. Working on them and seeing his reaction earlier when I gave them to him helped as well. I feel alright leaving him now, that he'll be alright without me and he'll be able to remember our wonderful time together as well as Emma being able to see how much I love her. Even if she doesn't remember me exactly she'll have the opportunity to look back on them. My fear has always been what will happen to Tamaki once I'm gone and I'm sure he'll be a wreck no matter what but he'll have Emma beside him which will help greatly I believe. She is such a blessing for us, she came at the perfect time I'm sure of it."
Yoshio said little from hearing all of that. He gave more than just props for his youngest child's strength throughout this entire ordeal. He was just like his mother.

New Years Eve they sat together in Emma's room to help her fall asleep. She had a cold, nothing serious but it still bothered her and kept her up. Kyouya couldn't get too close to her for fear of getting sick himself but he found it hard to stay away completely. He sat near the window while Tamaki held her trying to get her comfortable and sleep for the night.
"Do you know if something is going on with your sister in law?"
"Which one?"
"Akito's wife. I noticed she seemed to be acting a little strange at Christmas. It wasn't ashamed or sad or even disappointed. I don't know the right word but I definitely got something from her."
"No I got the same thing from her. Your right she was acting strange, yet I can't describe it."
"I hope everything is alright."
"I'm sure we would have heard something if it was major."
"I guess so. Well I hope so, I really like her. Now the other one, she scares me a little" Kyouya couldn't disagree with that. With Emma finally falling asleep Tamaki put her down and together they walked to their room. Sitting on the loveseat by the window they watched the fireworks going off, to welcome in the New Year, enjoying the quiet time together.

With the New Year brought the end of what they knew and the beginning of what would be. A beginning they didn't want. Kyouya was finding it harder and harder to leave the bed after Akito did what he had to some mornings. He chose to stop the drugs that were meant to slow the cancer it was barely working anymore anyway but he had to deal with the consequences doing so came with. He wasn't in pain so much as he was tired. On the days he could make it out of bed he still found it incredible difficult to get to Emma's room. When he couldn't get to her she came to him which made him feel a little better to. He feared the day she was scared of him from the wires and any help he was given by machines. He worked at the hospital long enough to know children were terrified of such scenes. On days he was stuck in the smaller, uncomfortable bed he drew away with the kit Tamaki gave him. It was the perfect thing, just like Tamaki, he was the perfect person.

As he fell on the bed he shared with Tamaki to rest for awhile he felt hands, soft hands, Tamaki's hands, gently stroke his face. He loved having that ability, to know Tamaki's touch without even having to open his eyes.
"I'm bothering you aren't I?"
"No, you're fine. Where's Emma?"
"Napping."
Sitting up he repositioned himself to hold Tamaki so they could rest together.
"Tamaki I want you to know something. I don't know how long I'll be able to do this, keep you close at night or even be able to get off the bed."
"I understand and don't worry about me. I don't want you to push yourself just for my sake. If you need to give into your body than do it. I want you to be comfortable, everything else isn't important."
"I love you. I want you to know that. I truly, with all my heart love you."
"I love you too,fFor being in my life the day after I moved here and for putting up with me for so long. You're everything I was looking for and then some." They brought their lips together locking them for as long as they were able. Both fell asleep shortly after still resting on each other, taking advantage of this time alone. Kyouya was grateful to Tamaki for letting him go when he was ready, that was one thing he was scared for, dying before Tamaki was ready to lose him. He needed to hear that he would be okay when he passed on, whenever he passed on.

By the end of January Kyouya gave up trying to leave the hospital bed in their bedroom even after Akito did what he had to. His body always hurt and felt weak, he slept as soon as his body was able to relax until the pain became an issue and woke him up. He loved yet felt bad, for Tamaki never left his side for more than a few minutes making sure he was comfortable and still eating and drinking properly. Emma stayed with him as well, the three of them would sit on the little bed to spend the day or she would play in their room when didn't want to sit still. If Tamaki wanted to hold him and cry he didn't show it, he would just smile and create small talk until he would feel even slightly better through that didn't mean he would stop when he did.

Trying to get comfortable, an already impossible feat, he felt Tamaki wrap his arms around him.
"Your medication doesn't seem to be helping you as well anymore."
"I am completely unlucky. My body stops responding to anything after a while."
"Seriously or are you joking?"
"Joking but it certainly feels that way." Moaning he tried to shift his body hoping to alleviate some of the pain. He knew what his only real option was if he told Akito and that wasn't what he wanted at this moment, perhaps in the morning he would. Tamaki stayed up most of the night with him hoping something would work so Kyouya could rest. When morning finally came Tamaki stepped out to check on Emma while Akito did his normal routine. He knew what was coming when he got back, his time was running short, they wouldn't have much time together.
"Tamaki I know you're busy but can I talk to you for a minute?" Lowering Emma to hold her at his hip he saw Akito at her door.
"Sure it's not a problem." Placing Emma on the floor he knelt down to get her to try and understand what he was saying. "I'll be right back Emma, can you play by yourself while momma's gone and then we'll play when I get back alright?" Pushing her gently towards her toys he stood back up to follow Akito.
"I want to discuss an option with Kyouya but I want you to understand what it means as well." Walking into their bedroom his heart shattered as he heard his moaning, he was still in pain. How he wished he could take it all away from him, let him relax for once. Going next to him he took his hand and held it tightly trying to comfort him the best he could.
"Now I know what you felt when you had Emma, I'm sorry." He tried his best to smile at Kyouya's joke, he had such a bad sense of humor.
"Akito can you do something to help him, anything to help handle the pain he feeling?"
"That's what I want to discuss. I can do something to make him comfortable but the price is high. Kyouya, you won't be able to fight against it. You're only option left now is morphine. Your body is starting to shut down; I can see it in everything I've done so far this morning. I can make you comfortable with it until the end. I'm sorry. I wish I could do something else for you Kyouya."
"It's alright Akito you've done all you can, thank you." Tamaki tightened his grip on Kyouya's hand with both of his to bring it to his lips to let him know he understood what this meant and what his own thoughts on it were. He saw Kyouya's eyes on him asking if he was serious.
"I want to see you comfortable. I hate seeing you in so much pain. Do what you have to."
"Thank you. Alright Akito I'll do it but before you start I need Tamaki to do me a favor."
"Anything Kyouya." Whispering his Tamaki's ear he let him go and ran out of the room. Knowing the moment would be private he stepped away to get what he needed ready. He refused to give him enough to kill him but he would allow him to feel better. Morphine really was the last thing he wanted to use but Kyouya's body stopped responding to everything else. He saw in the corner of his eye as Tamaki brought Emma in the room. This was probably the last time she would ever see him alive. All of his training as a doctor could never have prepared him for this, watching as a father said good-bye to his daughter and she didn't even know it.

Kyouya placed Emma on his lap and listened to her talk even though he only understood about a third of it. They sat together for hours just the three of them holding a conversation with her. He could manage the pain a while longer if only for his daughter and their time together. She was his pride and joy and was worth all the pain in the world so long as he got to see her happy and smiling one last time. This was good-bye for them he could feel it but even so he wanted to make it a happy one. To have her last memory of him one with smiles on their faces instead of tears in their eyes. He watched as she moved closer to his chest as she became sleepy, looking at the clock he saw it was just about time for her nap.
"Emma, before you fall asleep daddy wants you to know that he loves you. I'll always love you even when I'm no longer able to tell you that. I hope nothing but the best befalls on you growing up and you're happy with whoever you become. I will always cherish all the days we spent together and watching you grow up. You're the best daughter any father could ever have and I just want you to know that and never forget it."
"I love daddy." Wrapping her arms around his chest the best she could she snuggled him.
"I love you too my princess." He held her close while she fell asleep on him and watched her sleep for a little while before he kissed the top of her head and had Tamaki take her to bring her into her own room. Once she was gone Akito got to work by starting to hook up all he had to do.
"Are you okay Kyouya, can I help you somehow? I know that couldn't have been easy. Do you want me to give you a minute?"
"No I'm alright. Waiting won't solve or change anything." Still even as he said it Akito couldn't help but notice he had tears running down his face.

That night Tamaki slept beside him as best as he could, he felt better seeing he wasn't in so much pain anymore. Kyouya deserved peace from all of this; he had gone through enough already. Before he allowed his eyes to close he whispered in his ear how much he truly loved him and how it was okay if he wanted to stop his fight. They would meet again someday. Even if that wasn't in another fifty years it would happen and then they could be together for the rest of eternity.
"You better still love me when I'm older looking that's all I'm saying."
Placing his head in Kyouya's chest he cried softly while listening to the steady heart beat and feeling the rise and fall of his chest. He wondered how many more nights he would be able to do this. How much longer did he have to feel Kyouya's warmth or hands wrapped around him to hold him near? "I love you."

For two days Tamaki didn't leave Kyouya's side, he hated leaving even as he spent some time with Emma. His parents had come over along with Kyouya's family to be with him and see how they could help. Since their house had plenty of room for all of them they all planned to stay near and help the best they could. Annie-Sophia watched Emma at times along with Kyouya's sister and sister-in-law, she had no idea that her father was slowly dying just down the hall from her. The night of February nineteenth Tamaki could feel Kyouya's life slipping. It was very likely that he wouldn't it through the night and if he did then by noon tomorrow Tamaki would lose him. It took all he had to stay strong and not cry as they laid together. The conversation between them was slim for it was hard for both of them to speak; they just let the other know they were there and vice versa. Tamaki ran a hand through Kyouya's hair as he watched his husband's sleeping face. Even with the oxygen mask on and the loss of color he thought he was gorgeous. Fighting all this time hadn't caused him to lose his beauty, in fact his skin still shined with his natural glow.
"Tamaki, why don't you stretch your legs. I'll keep an eye on him. You haven't moved for hours."
Taking his eyes off the one he loved for a second he looked behind him at Akito before looking back.
"I'm alright. I just want to stay right here for now."
"I understand."
"Akito, I just want to say thank yo." He stopped as Kyouya started coughing, gasping for air. The heart monitor showed an increase in speed, it was having trouble keeping up to the demand his body was placing on it. Akito moved around to the other side of the bed to find out exactly what was going on. Tamaki stood up but refused to let go of his hand and head.
"I'm right here Kyouya it will be alright." Taking a glance at Akito he could tell it wouldn't be, soon, it would all be over soon.
"Tamaki…"
"Sshh don't say anything I'm right here and not going anywhere don't worry."
"No, listen to me. Thank you, Tamaki, for everything. I loved getting to spend the time we had together with you. It's made me, happy."
"Sshh don't do this. I know. I know, don't force yourself to tell me." Seeing him struggling to breathe and watching Kyouya's love for him fighting the pain in his eyes got to him, he couldn't stay strong. The one he loved was dying, their time was up. Holding his hand closer he couldn't stop the tears from falling. He didn't want to say good-bye to him.
"Tamaki can you do me a favor? Can you smile for me? You weren't meant to frown."
"I can't, it's too hard, ask something else of me." Neither were aware that their families stepped in the room, no one had fallen asleep in case something happened. The maids and housekeepers stayed outside of the room sending their thoughts and love from there not wanted to bother them.
"Please, for me. I want to see the smile I fell in love with one more time. I don't want to leave you seeing you so sad."
"I can't, I can't smile knowing I'm going to lose you forever." More tears fell down his face as he could feel Kyouya fading fast.
"Not forever, we'll meet again. And I'll still love you, even if your old looking I promise. Now please smile for me."
Shaking his head no he closed his eyes to concentrate on getting his face to allow himself to smile. He wanted to let Kyouya go happy, he deserved to die happy. Opening his eyes he smiled at him, he flashed the same smile he showed to him when they first met all those years ago in their middle school. He may have still been crying but he had a smile on his face. Kyouya cracked his own smile as he saw Tamaki's.
"Thank you for that. Please tell Emma I love her will you. And I love you. You'll be okay I'm sure of it."
"I will tell her. I love you too." Leaning over he took the oxygen mask off Kyouya's face to kiss him with all the love he felt for him one last time. Kyouya could taste Tamaki's salty tears on his lips grateful he got to die this way, kissing his true love, feeling their love throughout him as his heart stopped. Tamaki didn't stop as he heard the heart monitor start beeping signally the heart was slowly to critical levels. As he heard it flat line, his tears flooded from his eyes as he moved to kiss Kyouya's neck. Everyone in the room fell silent even managing to silence their tears as they saw Kyouya's last breathes and Tamaki's tears for the one he loved. The maids held onto each other as they cried over the death of their employer, to them he was family, this wasn't just a job and the house would never be the same without him. Tamaki's tears peaked as the final dam broke and flooded his eyes as he stood up. His heart may be shattered and forever incomplete without his other half, without his best friend but at least Kyouya was at peace now. That was worth all the pain he felt, his love deserved to feel peace at least.
"I'm going to call it now. Time of death is seven twelve am on February twentieth." Akito walked over to the chart to mark it before seeing his father and family. That was it, his baby brother had passed away today from cancer that he failed to stop, their family would never be the same, whole, neither would the family his brother created with Tamaki. He was grateful to feel his wife's arms around him, watching his brother slowly die these past months had done a number on him, feeling so helpless as he couldn't do anything. "You did all you could for him and we all know he was grateful to you for it."

Feeling a hand on his arm Tamaki saw his mother beside him. Moving, he cried on her shoulder in hopes to stop the pain in his heart. Pain he knew would never stop no matter how much time passed. Time couldn't bring back what he lost.
"Look Tamaki, he died peaceful, happy almost. You did that for him." Lifting his head he looked to see she was right, he looked happy.
"I can't believe he is really gone, I knew it was coming but he was still here."

"Tamaki, Kyouya had arrangements made correct? If you tell me where he kept them I'll contact them about setting up his wake." Yuzuru stood beside him with Yoshio, both willing to do what they could for their sons and sons-in-law. Moving away from his mother he walked over to his nightstand and pulled out the folder Kyouya kept all his arrangements and wishes for his funeral.
"This should be everything." Yoshio opened it to see how everything was laid out before walking out with Yuzuru to use the office downstairs. Hearing Emma start to stir in her room a couple maids quickly went to her before Tamaki heard her. They didn't want him to have to worry about any more than he had to right now.
"Can I be left alone for a few minutes?" He needed a moment alone with Kyouya before they came to take him away. Everyone left in the room slowly walked out. Fuyumi was led out by her brothers as he eyes were too blurry to safely walk out on her own. Annie-Sophia closed the door behind her to give her son the time he needed. Even though he knew this was coming she knew you couldn't be ready for it or make it easier when it happened.

Walking back over to Kyouya he took his hand one last time and placed his head on his chest knowing he wouldn't hear his heartbeat. Staying this way he cried until there was a knock on the door telling him that the people were here from where the wake was being held to prepare Kyouya for tonight. It took a minute for a sound to come out of his mouth but when he did let them enter and he forced his hand to let go of Kyouya's.
"I love you Kyouya. Please watch over us. I'll be waiting for the day I get to see and be with you again."

0o0o0o0o0

So I cried and got teary eyed though out the ending the chapter. So if proof reading isn't as great as it should be you know why. Please review and I'll work on the next chapter tomorrow.
~Femalefighter~