Chapter 19 Finding Fight

Gale lay awake that night, despite the fact that it had been an exhausting day he could not manage to turn off his mind. Perhaps he was scared that if he fell asleep Katniss would be gone again when he woke up. However, she was fast asleep, laying her head on his chest over his heart. He smiled gently at her, her short hair was beginning to grow back and the bruises that covered her body were fading. Nevertheless, he knew she was in pain, not physically, but emotionally she was broken. Her words from that morning in the woods kept running through his mind 'I am so tried of fighting'. He didn't blame her for feeling that way, he would too. She had been through so much, not just in the past two years but her whole life, he had his family when his father had died, but she was forced to take care of her's when her mother became too depressed.

She had to have been scared, taking on the burden of a family when she was still a child. He had never considered then being children back then, taken offence to it even if someone had called them children. But that's what they were, if life had not been what it was they would still be children on some level, they would still be dreaming of the life they could have and would never have been responsible for anyone else. Most people around the ages of eighteen and twenty were at the prime of their lives in District 12, despite being forced to work in the mines. They were old enough not to fearing the reaping for themselves and but not yet old enough to fear for their children. But Katniss was forced to be a parent when she was still a child, caring not only for herself but for her little sister, for Prim, who she would do anything for.

Then Prim was reaped, Gale often thought that Prim really didn't have any slips in the reaping bowl, rather Katniss had twenty-one and Prim's name was on a single one. He had known from the moment that Effie Trinket had announced that Primrose Everdeen was that years tribute, Katniss would volunteer. Before he could even think he was running forward to hold Prim back like Katniss would do for him had their places been reversed. No matter how much he had wanted to he couldn't ask her to change her mind, nor could she if she had wanted to. She would never be able to live with herself if she had let Prim go and Gale knew it. So she volunteered and as much as it killed Gale he watched her go without a fight, holding her sister back as if both their lives depended on it. He knew that if he had only known what the next two years would bring he would have skipped Prim and pulled Katniss into his arms. He would take her into his arms and run, run deep into the woods where nobody could find them, like she had wished he had, like both of them wished he had.

Gale mush have fallen asleep at some point because he awoke to someone knocking insistantly at the door to Katniss' hospital room. Katniss herself was still fast asleep, he gently eased himself out of bed before the knocking woke her. He was shocked to see that it had been Coin who had been knocking at the door, partly because she rarely visited anyone rather than sending a message to meet her. However, most of Gale's surprise was the fact that Coin had knocked, she was the type of woman who entered the room without asking, instead of waiting for permission.

"Soldier Hawthorne" Coin addressed him, unusually polite "I am here to speak with Miss Everdeen"

"She's asleep" Gale said trying to keep his voice light.

"I'm awake" A quiet voice said behind him, Katniss had slipped out of bed as quietly as she had walked beside him in the woods years before. She looked exhausted to Gale, but stood with her arms over her chest as she stared at Coin. For a moment he could see the girl he had lost two years before: strong, stubborn, unafraid. Gale slipped an arm around her, not yet trusting her weak frame to hold her up for long, especially after the late night trip to the woods that he hoped Coin didn't know about.

"Miss Everdeen" Coin addressed, attempting to smile "I understand that it has been...difficult, to cope with everything but the rebellion could largely benefit from your assistance"

Gale expected Katniss to shake her head, retreat into him, say no, start crying, anything but what happened.

"What kind of assistance?" Katniss asked, Gale looked at her in shock, this was the last thing he had expected was for Katniss to even consider helping Coin, especially after seeing her brake down last night.

Coin's forced smile grew larger "The type of assistance we require involves your experiences in the arena, as well as the Capitol. I assume Soldier Hawthorne has mentioned the propos to you" Katniss shook her head "No, we had talked about it. What I will need you to do is allow yourself to be filmed telling anything you can about the Games, life in District 12, the Capitol, anything that could aid in the Rebellion"

"I can do It" Katniss said, shocking both Gale and Coin.

"Excellent" said Coin after several moments of shocked silence, a wide grin spreading over her face "Excellent, Miss Everdeen Please report to my office later today during usual training hours. Soldier Hawthorne" she addressed Gale "you are expected to report to training as usual"

Gale nodded even though he knew Coin wasn't asking before she turned and walked off. Katniss shrugged his arm off of her, turned away from him, and ran a hand through her short hair.

"You don't have to do this" Gale said "I can go and tell her you changed your mind"

Katniss looked at him, anger flaring in her eyes "Why didn't you tell me about the propos?" she asked her voice raising.

Gale blinked, not expecting her to round on him like that "You said you were tried of fighting"

"But I want to help" Katniss cried "I want this to end"

"At what cost?" Gale asked harshly "driving yourself over the edge by talking about stuff that you can't even think about it without bursting into tears, with Coin of all people?"

"I just" Katniss began, tears slipping down her face "I just want it to be over, I want to go home"

"Then you better find one" Gale said marching out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

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