Well, I'm starting this chapter with an apology. My computer broke down, I started working part time as an English teacher, and I was living on my own for the past week, so I did not have the time to write, or the will, to be honest. And I am sorry. Believe me, I was thinking about this probably more than I should. I just didn't have the strength, the time, or a working computer to work on the story. But I returned today, and you guys put a huge grin on my face. I'm so unbelievably happy that you read my story. I can only hope you like it. I'm doing my best here. :) And a shout out to my amazing reviewers, because your words keep me going and inspired. Cheesy, but I send you all hugs and kisses. I will update again, probably tomorrow, if not, than the day after tomorrow. Now, enjoy this chapter.
I don' remember the last time I was as happy as I was tonight. My new family and my brother got along well, and we actually had fun. And the only thing that bothered me was that I had to say goodbye to Tyrion that soon. He is leaving at dawn. I made him promise that he will stay here longer on his way back to King's Landing. I was happy to see that he is welcome here. They might hate the Lannisters, but they have accepted two of them. Well, when I was a Lannister that is. I've been Elena Stark for a while now.
"What are you thinking about? Robb asked, and I snapped. I was unaware that I was staring at the wall in front of me, a small smile on my lips. My eternal pride was obviously visible.
"I'm sorry, I was just thinking about my brother." I said, a smile still lingering." And about something he said. Apparently, both Cersei and Jaime are devastated since I left King's Landing."
"Do you think that the words from the letter she sent you were honest?" he asked, and I shrugged. Of course, I told him about the letter. I'm not an idiot. Not only do I want us to trust each other completely, but Theon was the one who gave me the letter. If I had pretended not to receive a letter with both the Lannister and the Baratheon sigil, Robb would never trust me again. And either way, I wanted to share that with him. He would have noticed that something was not right. This way, I just told him in advance. Though, I did skip my sister's marital advice. I do not want him knowing about that, ever.
"Well, based on what Tyrion said, she truly is broken. But I wouldn't dwell on that too much. I spent most of my life close to her. I know that she can pretend better than anyone. I don't want to get my hopes up only to be disappointed. And it's not that important really. Not now that I'm here in the North, far away from her and King's Landing. Her decisions and feelings cannot affect me." I said, and he smiled slightly at me. He knows very well that this is not my favorite topic to talk about. I have been carrying this weight for years. I start to wonder if I was subconsciously seeking Cersei's approval all this time. But it was like I said, whether she was honest or not, now it is simply too late. And I think it wasn't about her approval in the end. I was being myself, she was being herself, and we were simply individuals who could not get along well. And I would rather choose the two of us not getting along over one of us changing. She is what she is, I am what I am, and that is the way it should be. At least to me.
"Elena, she is still your sister. It is more than normal for you to care for here." He said. I shook my head.
"It is not like that anymore Robb. If I had to choose between having her beheaded and spearing her life, I wouldn't kill her, but that is as far as my affection towards her goes. That is all. I only care for her not to wish her all the worst. When I needed her the most, she chose not to be there. I agree, it is absolutely lovely that she is willing to change, but I have nothing from her will." I said. I felt as if I was talking in vain. He, unlike myself, never felt what it is like not to be loved by the ones closest to you. He's lucky.
"Let's not talk about that anymore. I know you don't like to." He said, and I nodded, thinking that that was an understatement." Either way, I am glad Lord Tyrion came to visit us. I know how much you care for him." He said and I smiled back at him.
"Yes, I do. Who would have thought that the two embarrassing Lannisters would turn out to be the better two Lannisters? I wonder if my father found out about Cersei and Jaime." I added in a low voice.
"Well, if he didn't, I'm sure he will, soon enough." He said, and I nodded. Rumors travel fast, faster than we would like. Thankfully, I'm not usually the one who those rumors affect." I can't wait for father and mother to return." He said, and I turned around to look at him, suspicion visible on my face.
"I was under the impression that you think we're handling this quite well." I asked, and I laughed with him. Come to think of it, he might have said it to calm my nerves and prevent one of my fits of panic.
Even if he did, I was a lot calmer than I was before. There were no animals running around anymore.
"No, I still think that." He reassured me." We are doing a good job. I just… I suppose I just miss the freedom of not having these kind of responsibilities." He said. I think I understand what he means.
"I understand. But Robb, we will have to do this one day. We should be thankful your parents are giving us an opportunity to see what it will be like." I said. Sadly, Ned and Catelyn will not live forever. And one day, Robb will be Lord of Winterfell, and I, his wife, will be Lady of Winterfell. We could see now that it is not easy being in charge of Winterfell. And to me, the more practice we get, the better.
"Responsibility suits you." He said. He had that look on his face which he usually has when he's overthinking. I spend enough time with him, and now I can guess what he feels just by looking at his face. Now I can see that he's thinking about something, probably too much. I hope he's not able to read my facial expressions. That would be embarrassing. I raised my eyebrows, but he just nodded. I suppose that means I will not get an explanation." I might doubt myself, but I do not doubt you. I truly am lucky that you are my wife." He said, a small smile on his lips. This is the first time he said something like this, something that made me believe that we're making bigger progress than I initially thought.
"Because I am good at catching runaway pigs?" I asked, and he laughed.
"No." he said, still laughing. Once again, I raised my eyebrows, hoping to hear some reason behind this." I'll tell you someday." He said. I smiled, and I shrugged. I can't make him. Well, I might be able to make him tell me if I try hard enough, but I truly don't feel like that. I do not want to play games. So I just kissed him.
He did not complain. On the contrary, he was tugging down the laces of my dress.
Yes. If I tried hard enough, I have a feeling I could make him tell me just about anything.
…
"My lady!" someone yelled behind me, and I turned around, to see Elisa running towards me." There was a problem with the boar that was intended for dinner, but I managed to solve it. And Grayjoy has informed me that the repairs on the back walls are almost finished." She said, and I smiled.
"Elisa, have I ever thanked you for being as amazing as you are?" I asked, and she rolled her eyes.
"You never fail to mention it Elena." She said, and I started laughing." I'm only helping. No matter what you say, you are handling this more than well. Lady Stark will be happy." She said, and I smiled at her.
"I hope you're right. I have to go and find my husband, since he appears to be missing." I said and the irony was more than clear. I couldn't find Robb for a while now. I wasn't worried, but still. Elisa nodded, and I walked along. Only seconds later, Gray Wind was by my side, and I had stopped to pet him.
"Where in the name of Gods is your master, hm?" I asked. Gods, I'm talking to an animal. I'm losing my mind. And I should probably stop, before the animals start talking back to me. I got up on my feet, and walked away. Gray Wind followed me at once. I stopped, and so did Gray Wind. I raised my eyebrows and started walking again. He followed me, and when I stopped, so did he." I swear, if you follow me around any longer, I'm going to think Robb ordered you to do that, and you understood." I whispered. And like a confirmation, Gray Wind started licking one of my hands. All I could do is laugh.
He followed me around as I was trying to find Robb. He is not anywhere in the castle, or I simply missed him. I'm still not worried. He's a grown man, he doesn't need me to follow him around.
"Elena?" someone called, and I saw Jon walking towards me." Have you seen Arya?" he asked.
"She's not with Gendry?" I asked, and he shook his head." Maybe she's with Septa?" I guessed.
"No, I checked." Jon said.
"And have you checked if she's practicing archery or sword fighting?" I asked, and he nodded." She isn't there either? Well, you're not going to find her." I said, and I was laughing now. If Arya does not want to be found, she won't be found. That is the kind of girl she is. I decided not to worry just yet. I would probably pull my hair out if I worried every single time Arya isn't in sight. She tends to… run along.
"I swear to Gods, I love that girl, but sometimes, she's impossible." He said, and I laughed.
"Yes, she is. And your brother isn't much better either." I said, still irritated that I couldn't find the damn man! He would have told me if he was leaving Winterfell. I know that, because he told me every single time he had to do so." What do you need Arya for?" I asked.
"She was ready to torture me if I don't help her with her practice today. And now that I have the time to help her, she's nowhere to be found." He said. I was laughing because I was not used to seeing him so irritated. He is usually very good in keeping his emotions hidden.
"Well, I can't help you. I'm looking for Robb, and he's also nowhere to be seen." I said with a smile.
"Yes, but he won't do something… well, crazy." Jon said.
"Oh, for the love of Gods Jon, have a little faith in her." I said, and I smiled when he looked confused." I was Arya once. I was the one who wanted to do exactly the opposite of what I was told. She will grow out of it, just like I did. I am not saying that she won't have a sharp tongue anymore, but she will change. She will grow up." I told him. If there is one thing I am sure of it is that Arya is better of doing whatever she wants. Restrains never work, I know that from my own experience. And I do not want to see her family treating her like Cersei treated me. And also, the other way around. I was more rebellious than I should have been. And that was only because they tried to calm me, restrain me and control me.
"Sadly, that does not comfort me at all." he said, and I hit him on the shoulder, making him laugh." I was joking. I suppose you are right. You do understand her better than any of us do." He said.
"That is not true." I said firmly." I was just in her shoes. You're her family. I'm a new arrival." I added.
"You may be a new arrival, but you're still family. And if I dare say, a valuable member." He said, and I smiled. I was frightened about his reaction. It is not a secret that Catelyn is not fond of Jon, and I did not want him to see her treating me better than she ever treated him, especially every single day. That did not happen. Jon is not a vain person, and Catelyn did change her attitude. I could see that she was different to him now than she was when I was visiting Winterfell with the King. She does not exactly love him, but I did not see any glares from either one of them.
"Thank you Jon. That is…" I started, and then I saw Robb walking towards us." And where in the name of Gods have you been?" I asked. He was surprised, and he looked at Jon. As did I, and Jon just shrugged, a smile on his lips." Oh, no, you will not silently complain to your brother about me. That will wait. And now, husband, where have you been?" I asked. He may be the Lord, but I'm his fucking wife.
"I was trying to find Arya, wife." He said, and then he smiled." You're feisty today I see." He said.
"Oh, you noticed?" I asked.
"I liked you both better when you were scared to death of marring each other." Jon said in a low voice, maybe even hoping that we wouldn't hear him. We both did, and we both hit him on the shoulder.
"Well, I find this situation better. How about you Elena?" Robb asked me, a smirk on his face.
"Oh, I find it better too. I'm just not sure how long will it last." I said. I know he was just being funny, but I am not sure if I like discussing that period of time at all, let alone in front of Jon. I looked away, and I could see Arya running towards us." And he is the last missing Stark." I announced with a smile.
"I've been looking everywhere for you!" Jon told her.
"They're coming." She said, a smile on her face. I looked at Jon and Robb, and they looked just as confused as I felt. "I could see the carriages. Mother and father are coming." She said.
I think I have never felt relieved as I did now. Finally, the true leaders of Winterfell are back. Yes, Robb and I did a good job. We did not embarrass ourselves, even though I believe that the pigs incident will never be forgotten. We did well, in my opinion. But it is not our time just yet.
The whole family greeted them. And I hugged Catelyn probably tighter than I should. I am just so glad that I have time to learn from her all the things I need to learn.
We left the talk for the feast tonight. They were tired, and the only thing we needed to know was how is Catelyn's father. He is still in his bed, but he was getting better when they left.
Robb and I worked for the rest of the day. I had a huge smile on my face when Ned said that we did well and that we will help them from now on.
"Elena?" Catelyn called me, and I turned in my seat to her." Robb told me that you did more than fine, but I want to hear from you. How was it?" she asked, and I sighed.
"It was not easy. Most days, I was handling everything just fine. But I did shed some tears, and I did had animal troubles." I said, and she looked confused." I beg of you, do not ask." I whispered.
"I won't." she said with a small smile, which I returned." I'm proud of both of you. And if I dare say, I see that you get along well?" she asked, and I nodded. She doesn't need the details. She just worries.
"Yes." I said with a small smile, and she smiled back at me.
I cannot begin to describe the respect I have for her. I was in her shoes for a while, and I know that her days are not easy. And the love she has for her family is… beautiful to see. She welcomed me with open arms, and she helped me in every way possible. She accepted me like I was her own daughter.
I won over this family. All of them, and it was close to effortless. I was just myself. I didn't pretend, I didn't lie, I was honest and honorable, just like they are. It is safe to say, I am one of them.
As soon as Robb and I entered our chambers, we both just fell on the bed.
"I'm so glad that they're back." He whispered, and I started laughing.
"So that you can go back to being an irresponsible child?" I asked.
"Hey, I was never that." He said, and I laughed." But you are right." He said, and I turned to look at him. He was smiling. Gods, he has an amazing smile. His beard is concealing the dimples on his cheek, but I can still remember them. And to be honest, I prefer the beard." Still, I believe that I can be a responsible man and not an irresponsible child when it comes to some things." He said, and before I could say anything, he pulled me closer to him.
"Robb Stark, are you courting me right before you're about to bed me?" I asked with a smile.
"So what if I am?" he asked, and I laughed.
"I'm truly sorry, but you can't flirt." I said, and I started laughing when he looked hurt." Fortunately for you, neither can I. So, why don't you just take my dress of and kiss me?" I asked.
"If you insist Elena Stark." He said, and I rolled my eyes.
"What happened to Elena?" I whispered as I was moving so that I could sit on top of him. I'm starting to think that maybe I can flirt." I thought we weren't formal anymore?" I asked.
"You started it." he said, and I stopped untying his shirt. Well, I can try to play a game, can't I?
"I did." I said, and I kissed his lips briefly." Well then, goodnight Robb." I said, and I rolled over.
"You did not just do that to me." he said, and I smiled." You're good." He said with a smirk once he realized I was joking. I pulled him on top of me. He is a weight I love to feel on top of me.