9
A NEW DAWNChapter 18
Afterward
Soon everyone was wrapping each other up in hugs; even I didn't escape from that. Apparently, I had garnered a fan club, although the only one I wanted to be hugging was on four legs at the moment.
I caught Seth's thoughts as everyone's mood lightened, and through all of the jovial clatter of the wolves' mind-link, I found his enthusiastic desire to wrap his arms around me as well. Although, his thoughts weren't exactly as enthusiastic as mine, there was still the desire, so I was content with that.
Unfortunately, it would be a few hours before those desires would be fulfilled. First, I had to endure the endless expressions of gratitude, especially from the Denali sisters, who swore their lives to me for saving Irina. Even my new family wouldn't leave me alone, especially Carlisle, who wanted to know everything about how my abilities worked, when I knew, the questions were seemingly endless. Edward was also expressive, but not as lengthy as everyone else. Although, he did hug me for what seemed like an uncomfortable length of time, in Bella's opinion anyway. She, of course, wasn't about to offer me anything more than she had already given, keeping my secret and helping me with my plan. Instead, she stayed far away from me, turning her attention to Alice.
Speaking of, Alice and I were introduced briefly during the celebration, although she still seemed a bit confused about the whole situation, but Carlisle assured her that he would explain it all later. Jasper, on the other hand, seemed very intrigued by me, by the emotions I was emitting, so he suddenly became a constant companion- or shadow- depending on how you looked at it. It wasn't like my emotions were especially happy or positive in any way, they were more—neutral. However, to Jasper, this was the perfect kind of emotion, because it offered him balance.
Later, in between being bombarded by the grateful vampires, I actually had an interesting conversation with Jasper.
"Carlisle explained the situation surrounding your joining our family, but as with Bella, I don't understand how you can remain so calm, being that you are only days old; quite honestly, you confound me even more than Bella. Even after a few months, she still has moments where she has to focus intently to regain her control. Unlike you, who appears completely and utterly in control, and also blessed with such a powerful gift, I might add," Jasper said, as his thoughts were mired in deep contemplation.
"I'm not sure I can explain it to your satisfaction, Jasper. Since I was young, I have spent a lot of time working on ways of controlling my mind and emotions, after my parent's death, I was forced to focus even harder. I've studied many types of meditation and energy control, including taking a class in martial arts. I think maybe that is why I am able to be in such control; that and the fact that I made the decision to become a vampire, I voluntarily gave up my humanity," I said.
Jasper looked at me perplexed. "So do you really think that makes the difference?"
"I honestly do. If you think about it, most of the newborn vampires that you've seen, if not all, have been forced into this life. Wouldn't that make you angry? Bella had time to make peace with losing her humanity, and me; I've never felt like I was meant to be a human. So I was more than eager to ditch the human side and become what I feel I was meant to be."
"I guess I've never thought of it that way, but then again, I've never had a reason to think of that. It wasn't until Bella, and now you, that even made me realize that there was any other way for a newborn to behave."
"Just remember back to what you felt when you realized what you had become, and what you'd lost."
"Yes, I was angry for quite some time, although Maria did a good job of distracting me," Jasper chuckled once as he rolled through some very visual memories in his head.
"Um, yeah, I can see how that would be distracting," I said, rolling my eyes.
"Oh sorry, I forgot that you can read minds, this is going to be awkward now with both you and Edward around." We both laughed, although his laughter was much more of embarrassment.
Then I suddenly caught Seth's thoughts, and just as quickly, he appeared in the room. The sight of him suddenly aroused my desires, if my heart was still working, it would have jumped out of my chest.
He was wearing a tight white t-shirt, which was a little too short for him, leaving part of his rock hard stomach exposed. The shirt itself was also torn in a couple of places, exposing even more of his dark skin. He wore a pair of equally tight blue jeans, leaving little to the imagination. What made the whole scene worse was that his irresistible smile was focused solely on me.
"So much for being able to control your emotions," Jasper whispered. "What is that all about?"
"Nothing Jasper, nothing at all," I replied, not taking my focus away from Seth.
As if to explain for me, Seth suddenly scooped me up into his arms with a gigantic bear hug. He swung me around almost knocking over the glass coffee table. I was so caught up in this unexpected moment, that I wasn't able to focus on the thoughts running through his mind. Unfortunately, all too quickly, he released me and regained his composure.
"Um, remind me to save everyone more often," I chuckled, still caught up in my euphoric emotions.
The room suddenly became quiet, as Seth stared at me blankly; his thoughts were trying to decipher my meaning.
"Don't worry about it, I'm just excited to see you in your human form," I said casually. I wasn't lying, and the word "excited" was almost quite literal.
"Sorry about that, I guess today has just been such an emotional rollercoaster, and you were absolutely amazing," Seth said, the words coming out in an exuberant exhale.
I couldn't help but smile a huge glowing smile. He was still gazing into my eyes; his golden brown eyes were mesmerizing.
Then suddenly I heard a cough, it was Edward, instantly Seth stepped backwards and broke off our intense reunion. He nervously tried to shove his hands into his pockets, but there wasn't any room, so he resorted to just his thumbs.
"Thanks for the compliment, but it isn't necessary. I'm just glad that everything worked out and everyone is safe," I said, still smiling.
"You're much too modest," Seth said, trying not to look at me. "You are the reason the Volturi didn't fight, you stopped them, just like you said you would. Even Edward over there is telling everyone the same thing."
He nodded toward the small gathering in the large great room, just off the parlor from where we stood. Edward was explaining the entire scenario for his captive audience. The entire Cullen family was gathered, along with the Denali clan, Huilen, Nahuel and Jacob. The Amazon's had left earlier, along with the Egyptian clan, and the Irish clan.
Although Benjamin was reluctant to leave, Amun insisted that they not linger.
"You will come to visit us won't you?" Benjamin asked.
"Of course I will," I said, "although I can't make any promises of when, there are still a lot of things in my life that I need to figure out."
"Please make it soon," Benjamin said eagerly.
I simply smiled and nodded. Although I had enjoyed Benjamin's company, his thoughts made me feel a bit uncomfortable. I probably wouldn't have minded had I felt the same way, however, I couldn't help but feel bad for Tia. Even though she was aware of his desires, she was determined to see him happy, no matter how much it hurt her. Could I be that sacrificial for Seth? The thought made me shiver.
The Irish coven left shortly after the Egyptians. I gave little Maggie a big hug and thanked her for not telling the others that I wasn't being completely honest with them.
"Even though I knew you weren't being honest, I felt that you must have a good reason. As it turned out, I was right," Maggie said, showing off her dimpled smile.
Then I overheard Siobhan's farewell to Carlisle.
"I doubt the Volturi will forgive what happened here, I'm sure they will be looking for revenge," she said.
"Actually," I interjected, "Aro won't permit any retribution against any of us."
"Well I'm sure they'll find a way to try to finish us off separately," she disagreed.
"No, that won't happen. The reason being, Aro is hoping that one day I'll voluntarily join the Volturi, so he's not about to risk upsetting me. Caius, of course, won't be happy about that, but he won't cross Aro," I said with smirk, imagining Caius spending the next few centuries grumbling to himself about not being able to exact revenge.
"Once again, it seems, you've ended up saving us all," Siobhan said, putting her hand on Carlisle's shoulder.
I shrugged. "That's why I'm here afterall, to protect the innocent." Everyone smiled, many of them hopeful that what I had said about the Volturi was true.
When they were gone, Carlisle spoke to me quietly.
"I'm proud of you, Brady; you showed great courage and leadership today. Many of us knew there was something special about you, but we really had no idea of how special."
"I certainly didn't do anything to impress anyone. I've always known that I was meant to accomplish something, even in my dreams I was always protecting people," I said. I glanced down at the ground, becoming uncomfortable with all the praise.
"There is no need to be embarrassed Brady, you deserve the credit for all of our lives," Carlisle said.
"I'd rather not think like that, it makes me sound like some type of god, which I am not," I replied. "I'm here as a servant of the one who created me, not the other way around."
Carlisle just smiled at me, then hooked my arm and dragged me back into the house. He was afraid that, if given the opportunity, I would bolt, returning only after the celebrations had calmed down. I had thought about that, but something kept me there, no not something, but someone. Although, as the hour grew late, I began to fear that he wouldn't return.
Now I found myself confronted by the fact that he had returned, and was now standing here in front of me. Having just embraced me with such vigor and enthusiasm, he was now covering his thoughts with his usual mask.
"Let's go outside Seth, I can't take any more of this flattery, I'm afraid if I hear any more, it'll go to my head," I said.
Seth nodded, and followed me out the door. Ah, sweet privacy at last.
"Honestly Seth, you and the wolves deserve much of the credit, it was your appearance that stopped the Volturi in the first place," I said, sitting down under a large pine.
Seth stared down at me curiously. "It's still hard for me to believe that you are a vampire, you don't act like one, you still act very human. I've never seen a vampire just sit down like that, it's too weird."
"You're changing the subject," I said. "Besides, just because I don't need to sit, doesn't mean I don't enjoy sitting. Would it surprise you to learn that I also enjoy lying in bed?"
Seth's face suddenly flushed, and then he quickly took a seat beside me, avoiding my gaze once again.
"It was your plan, to have us to march out in synchronized formation. So it's hard for me to share in the credit, when you designed it all from the very beginning."
I exhaled sharply. "I'm glad that it all worked out, I was so paranoid that something was going to go wrong."
"You certainly didn't act paranoid, you took command of the field, you faced off against vampires who are thousands of years old, and you beat them at their own game."
"Seth, stop that, I don't want to be seen like that, especially by you."
"It's true, so how can I not see you like that?"
I turned to face Seth; I looked squarely into his beautiful eyes.
"You are my best friend Seth, that, and that alone, is all I want from you." That wasn't true, but if friendship was all he was willing to give, I would gladly accept it.
Seth smiled, and then rested his head back against the tree, his mind suddenly filled with memories of our brief past together.
Time seemed to lurch forward then, and all too soon, Seth returned to La Push. I was able to avoid any more praise and fanfare from my family, by using the patio door to my bedroom. For the rest of the night I lay on the bed, thinking about the future, trying to find my place in it.
The next morning, I approached Carlisle with some of the things I had thought about during the night.
"Carlisle, I wonder if you have any books or material on languages?" I asked.
"Edward and I have plenty of material on pretty much any language you can think of, but if I may ask, why the sudden interest?"
"I got thinking last night, that I need to find some sort of occupation. I don't want to live off the Cullen's money, so I wanted to find some way of making my own."
Carlisle shook his head. "You don't need to rush into anything, nor do you need to worry about money. Remember, the Cullen's money, is rightfully your money now too."
"Be that as it may, I also need to find something to do with my time, you know. I'm the only single one in this house, and nights can get pretty lonely around here." I glanced down at the floor, trying not to reflect too much into that.
"Yes, I can definitely understand about that, Edward was the same way, as was I for centuries. Just don't despair, I'm sure you'll find a nice girl a lot sooner than any of us did, you are much more, uh, advanced, than we were at your age."
"A nice girl" he said, I instantly wanted to hurl. Not because of the girl aspect, but because I really hated people assuming anything about me. People always like to believe that everyone is heterosexual; it's no wonder that gay people find a need to be flamboyant; it's the only way to make sure people don't assume you into a corner.
"I really could care less about that aspect, Carlisle, I want to concentrate on developing myself before I become distracted," I said coolly.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to imply anything," he said as he motioned me to follow him. "I keep all of my books up here in my study; you're welcome to anything I have in here. I have many books on languages, although, I believe you might be more interested in Edward's collections. He has a lot of the more modern types, the ones that come with CD's for actually learning languages."
"Yes, those are the types I'm interested in, the ones that will help me learn, and learn quickly."
"Why the hurry? Do you have something in mind?" He stopped at the doorway to his study, turning to survey my face.
"I'm not very patient, and with this new photographic brain of mine, I don't foresee me studying any one language for any length of time."
"You definitely remind me a lot of Edward." He chuckled once, and then opened the door and led me in.
I was amazed by the sheer scope of the room. It had an immensely high ceiling, with dark paneled walls, which were mostly covered by bookcases. The bookcases were floor to ceiling, obviously custom designed, with a rolling ladder to reaching the highest shelves. In one corner was a large mahogany desk with an expensive looking leather chair.
"Over here you'll find the books on languages," he said as he pointed to an area near his desk. "I could point out all of the different categories of books that are here, but I think it would be more fun for you to explore on your own."
I smiled, understanding exactly what he meant. "Yes, I definitely prefer to explore on my own."
He returned the smile, and then he turned my attention to an area behind me.
"Do you recognize anyone in this picture?" he asked, pointing to an immense, ornately decorated painting.
I scrutinized the picture for a few brief seconds, and then raised an eyebrow.
"If I were to guess, I'd say that was you along with Aro, Caius and Marcus."
"You're exactly right. Now did you get that from the paining itself, or from my head?"
"I don't need telepathy to recognize that trio. I've seen every thought, every memory that they've ever had, including memories of this very painting."
"Amazing! What else did you find in their heads?"
Carlisle was suddenly in full detail obsession mode again, it was something that happened to him when his curiosity activated.
"Sorry Carlisle, but I don't kiss and tell, so to speak."
He shrugged. "I guess that's fair enough, at least I know now that you won't be telling other people about all of the thoughts that have rattled around in my head," he laughed.
"Honestly, I haven't probed your memories; I don't have a reason too. With the Volturi, it was because I needed the advantage, but I have no need to delve into the minds of those I trust."
"Thank you Brady, that means a lot." We both smiled, and then I returned my attention back to the multitude of images on the wall, putting together pieces of the past, while Carlisle explained them all in full detail.
Later that morning, I finally had the opportunity to talk to Edward about my desire to learn languages. He was quick to shuttle me off to his room where he quickly boxed up every language book that he had, insisting that I keep them as long as I wanted.
I felt oddly comfortable with Edward. It wasn't that I was attracted to him, although I did find him attractive. It wasn't because he was cool, fashionable, or extremely talented; it was because he was so similar to me; excluding those traits. We were very similar creatures on the inside, and so we just naturally connected. He was like the twin brother that I never had, which I realized would be legally true soon.
"So how are things with Seth?" Edward asked in a casual tone.
I sighed. "Complicated. I just don't know what he really feels deep down; he has a way of masking over certain thoughts. It drives me crazy not knowing, but, I'm not about to risk our friendship by pushing the issue."
"That's probably best. If he is confused or isn't ready to deal with his feelings, its best not to push him."
"I'm surprised that you are so comfortable talking about this, I guess I just expect everyone to be creeped out by it."
Edward chortled. "I've been in too many people's heads to find anything creepy anymore. I've seen love through many people's minds, and I realized long ago that love is love, no matter what gender or orientation is involved."
"I'm glad. It's nice to be able to talk to someone, I've never had anyone to talk to in person about this, and the two gay guys that I've actually met, didn't have conversations on their mind."
Edward looked at me with a crazy crooked smile, and then shook his head in amusement; for once in his life, he was glad that he wasn't able to peer into someone's thoughts.