Sam held his head, standing in an empty house. Ruby had switched bodies, trotting around in some Jane Doe and Sam had a drink firmly in hand next to his temple. He was torn. He wanted to call Loki, tell him he was okay. He wanted to go see where Max had hid himself when Ruby had intruded. But he knew Loki would disapprove. He knew Loki would try to stop him.

Sam had to kill Lilith. If he killed Lilith and avenged Dean, the world would be a better place. Lilith would stop taking childrens' bodies and killing people. Lilith would stop hurting people period. Then he could breathe easy. Then maybe he and Loki could take that trip. They could go to Vegas like Dean and him used to. He could be at peace then. Lilith would be dead and he and Loki would be happy. It was simple. Loki would forgive him. Ruby knew where Lilith was. They'd go soon and kill her and then he'd be back before Loki knew he'd been gone.

A soft hand ran over Sam's shoulder and he looked up, seeing Ruby.

"Booze aren't going to help you fight." Ruby told him, "And it's far too soon to go after her anyway."

"I just want to get this done." Sam muttered tightly. He hadn't had a drink in a week. It soothed his guilt about hiding this from Loki. It soothed a lot of tension; like missing Dean. It got him back into the hunter mentality better.

"You're almost up to par." Ruby said, "But we need to do this smart or not at all."

"Yeah, yeah." All Sam wanted to think about was Lilith's head on a pike.

"I mean it." Ruby said firmly, "We're not going half cocked like last time." Sam glowered at his bottle. He didn't want to wait, he was ready. He'd been ready since he and Dean first heard the name Lilith. There was a whoosh of air and Sam felt it was familiar as he looked up.

"'Scuse me." Loki stood there, looking angry and tense, "Am I interrupting something?"

"Loki." Sam sat up straight, startled. Ruby instinctively took a step back and Loki's eyes flickered to her. He lifted his hand and Ruby was thrown back into a near by wall with enough force to make the whole building rattle.

"You stay right there, princess," Loki wagged a finger at Ruby, "I'll rip into you in a minute." Sam stood, startled again by the violence of it.

"Loki, don't kill her." Sam asked, because without Ruby, how was he going to get to Lilith? Loki then turned his anger on Sam, golden eyes burning.

"Sam, I told you to DROP the Lilith business." Loki's nose wrinkled, his lips curling into a half snarl. Sam had not seen Loki's anger for a long while and for a moment he wasn't sure why Loki was so angry about it.

"Loki. We are so close to killing Lilith." Sam pleaded, "Ruby knows where she is. I don't have to research omens or children killing their families..." Loki's hand curled and Ruby cried out in pain, as though her insides were being crushed. Sam took in a sharp breath, "What are you doing?!"

"You are not killing Lilith." Loki told him and the anger rose up in Sam's veins. How dare Loki tell him to stop when he was so close. It was all he had to do and then he'd be free to go with Loki where ever he liked. He didn't care after Lilith was dead.

"Killing Lilith is important to me. I have to stop her from hurting anyone else. I'm the only one that can do it." Sam's fists clenched when he heard Ruby whine in pain again, "Loki stop it! Stop hurting her!"

"If she's gone, you can't pursue Lilith." Loki said simply. Sam stomach burned, the familiar power of anger fueling him. Why was Loki always trying to detour him from helping Dean or getting rid of Lilith; the two things that he felt it was in his power to succeed. He was the only one who could kill Lilith and he'd already failed Dean, he couldn't fail at this.

"Are you protecting Lilith?" Sam glared at Loki, wondering if this was all another lie. Wondering if Loki was in with Lilith. Loki looked at him with shock, so much that Ruby fell to the floor, no longer pinned to the wall.

"I'm not protecting Lilith. I wish she'd do everyone a favor and shiv herself." Loki turned towards Sam, "But you can't kill Lilith."

"I'm the only one that can!" Sam tossed his empty bottle down and it shattered on the floor, "I'm the only one that can kill Lilith and I'm the only one that will!" Loki eyed Sam, frown deepening.

"You've been drinking."Loki muttered and Sam stomped his foot.

"Yeah, so? I'm allowed to drink, I'm an adult!" Sam yelled loudly, stepping closer and looming over Loki. Honestly, it was like they couldn't go a week without arguing about something. How could he ever think about living with Loki?

"You're not a pretty drunk I hope you know." Loki's nose wrinkled distastefully, standing his ground.

"All I have to do is kill Lilith and it'll be over! It's the last thing I have to do for Dean. And we're so close. So close..." Sam clutched his hands. Because he could just imagine getting his hands on Lilith.

"Damn it, Sam. You have to drop your Dean obsession!" Loki snapped, voice loud, "The only thing that's going to happen is that you're going to get hurt."

"I don't care." Sam said truthfully. The only thing that mattered was Lilith loosing her head.

"I DO care. I love you and I don't want to see you hurt!" Loki snapped and Sam took a step back, his anger quelling with the shock of it. Love? The last person Sam loved was burned alive on the ceiling. Loki seemed to realize what he said and his body went tense, in the way someone did when they said something they weren't supposed to. Sam's hands ran into his hair, a small streak of panic running through him. Loki loved him? A god and a monster loved him? A man loved him.

"You..." Sam swallowed and Loki took a deep breath, body relaxing.

"I love you." Loki repeated, confirming that it wasn't just a spur of the moment decision, "Nothing will end if you kill Lilith. Please. This isn't going to end well for anyone." Loki waved his hand gently, wanting Sam to come closer, "It's not too late. Let's go back home. You can go back to hunting other things. Anything but this. Sam, you need to trust me on this."

Sam's throat swelled, staring at Loki and then he looked back to Ruby, who was sitting very still, watching the two interact. She was smart enough to not try to get away, not with a god in the room. Sam looked back to Loki. What was he doing? Giving up on Dean? Letting Lilith go? Moving in with a trickster? Loving him?

No. Sam shook his head, taking another step back from Loki. No, this was never what he wanted. He wanted to be normal. He never asked Loki to love him. He never wanted that. Loki was just manipulating him again. He couldn't love Loki back. He had to kill Lilith.

"Love?" Sam scoffed suddenly, holding his head and Loki straightened up, focused intently on Sam. Sam gave a condescending smile, shaking his head, "You... think that I could love you back?" Loki looked struck and Sam held on to that, because he hadn't had any power in this relationship. Hurting Loki physically seemed impossible at best, but if he wanted Loki to butt out, this was it, "I don't need you. I never needed you. You're the one that shoved your way into my life. I never asked you to. I don't need you to baby me or tell me how to run my life. You think just because you're a god you can make me do what ever you say? You killed Dean over a hundred times. You manipulated me. You forced me to listen to you. You cornered me into everything you did. Even Sex." All the color was drained from Loki's flesh and his eyes were wet and Sam clinched his victory, "I don't trust you. I don't love you. And I certainly don't need you."

Loki's mouth opened, but no sound came from it. Sam had caused Loki, Mr. Silver Tongue to loose his words. Burning Loki felt great, it gave Sam a thrill like no other. He felt powerful.

Loki took a deep breath and his body straightened, composing himself in a strained way and his face fell into a slate blank state that Sam had never seen before. He looked older, less like the easy going trickster he'd ever known. For a moment, Loki looked broken.

Loki's voice didn't shake though, "This is your choice then." He lifted his hand, looking at Sam for a second longer before he snapped his fingers and he was gone, as if he'd never been there before. Sam turned and went over to Ruby, who stared at him, looking scared of the man just left.

"Who..." She started and Sam took he arm, lifting her back onto her feet. Ruby wasn't a god. She needed him to kill Lilith. She didn't make him do anything.

"Nobody." Sam said, looking her over, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." She said and leaned her head to the side, cracking her neck, "Hurt like a bitch though." Sam swallowed, taking her hand.

"Just tell me what I have to do to kill Lilith." He asked and Ruby gave him a knowing smirk.

"Good to know you're diving into this feet first." She raised both brows, giving Sam a stern look, "He was right on one thing. No turning back after we do this." Sam nodded.

"That's fine." Sam nodded, "The only thing that matters is killing Lilith." Sam ignored the burning in his mind. The burning of the path he'd seen so clear only a few days. Burning the bridge to Loki. The red path had just opened back up, flowing like a flood downwards. He was doing the right thing. He had to be, this was his choice.