Well, here it is. Nothing to say.

Chapter 20

He had followed me into the elevator with silence and slowly made our way down the hall to the cafeteria. As the continuous grey walls passed us, I felt my adrenaline pumping madly through my body. We turned a corner, and there were the doors.

I slowed down just a bit, closing and reopening my eyes to assure self-control.

Step… step… step…

Iwas at the door, staring at the small cracks around the handle. I reached for it, almost touching the smudged metal, when Havoc grabbed my hand. I looked down as he raised it a bit, looking carefully.

"You're shaking." He whispered. Sure enough, my hand was quavering in his, and I felt a shiver travel up my spine. But I wouldn't let it weaken me, not like earlier today. I shook my head and pushed the doors open with the other hand before Havoc wasn't able to finish a sentence.

"Rose, I don't see why you won't tell-"

And there they were. Their chairs instantly scooted out as we went through the creaking doorway, startled and excited at the awaited appearances. For a moment, I felt like I was a celebrity; until I remembered it wasn't me who they were waiting for.

Kyara looked adorable in a small black dress with her hair in a ponytail, as did Kari in her pink sundress (she had a thing for sundresses). Roy was next to her, smirking in a black button-down T-shirt and jeans.

Our guests stood next to him.

Grace looked prettier than she did at the flower shop. Her hair was tied low in a pink ribbon that matched her slim-yet-innocent dress. Her eyes brightened as soon as she found them on the person behind me, her eyelashes fluttering up and revealing that remarkable glow she tended to give off when happy. Next to her, Tara was in a (of course) black dress and gothic makeup, and after looking at Havoc, began whispering into Grace's ear. What she had said to her made her sad, for her smile soon faded as her eyes looked down. I looked down on my shirt, on my pants, anything, but I couldn't see anything for them to whisper about that could make her droop like that.

Then I noticed Havoc was still holding my hand.

I quickly pulled away, looking at Kyara for guidance, my hand suddenly cold with lost warmth. She simply smiled bigger, giving me that "I know it wasn't an accident" look, but I shook my head vigorously. Grace probably hated me right now, so I decided not to dig a deeper hole and step forward.

"Hi there!" I said as cheerily as I could manage without yelling, and stepped up to the table. "Well, welcome to Head Quarters!" She must have thought I was crazy, considering yesterday when I met her I didn't even have the courage to shake her hand.

Havoc wasn't behind me, I could sense. I slowly looked over in his direction, and wasn't able to keep my smile.

He was staring at her with the most unreadable expression, his eyes wide with disbelief and… some small shine in them, like an old memory replaying in his mind. I could stare into them now, now that they weren't staring into mine. I could see him, Jean Havoc, staring into this other girl's eyes with confused longing. His hand holding mine seemed like ages ago.

I looked to the flower girl with a look almost identical, but a little happier, as if the memory was a good one. Then, I did something I would never do if I was completely sane.

"Grace! Tara! It's wonderful to see you again." I faked. Grace didn't bother to look away from Havoc, but Tara replied.

"Yup. We're starved. Right, Grace?" she turned to her friend. Once again, the dazzling girl was too transfixed in Havoc's gaze and would not speak to her friend, but after a few small nudges and one sharp, painful-looking jab in the stomach she got her attention. Havoc cleared his throat softly behind me as the annoyed flower girl frowned at her spunky partner.

"Havoc, Rose, please join us. The food should be here soon." Roy intervened to break the awkward arrival. I nodded and walked to the table, hearing Havoc's feet shuffle over to the table as well. I pulled out my own seat and sat down next to Kyara, while he slumped into the chair beside me.

That was only the beginning.

----------------

Things only got worse from there on.

It was annoying enough to see them stealing glances at each other every 5 seconds, adding no comment to the conversations, and their rosy cheeks, but the worst thought of all was that Havoc didn't hear a word I would say to him.

"Havoc, please pass the potatoes" I asked in the middle of dinner. He didn't seem to notice my speaking, as he only continued to stare into space and over at Grace. I asked again a little louder.

"Havoc…"

He blinked, but didn't look, so I kicked his shin as hard as I could.

That definitely caught his attention, as well as Grace's, who looked over at Havoc when he hissed a curse under his breath, staring angrily at me as I took a bite of revolting tofurkey.

"Havoc? Is something the matter?" She looked worryingly in his direction. He snapped his head over immediately and shook his head, the scowl gone.

"No. not at all."

Dinner was finally finished 10 minutes later when Roy stood up and began gathering dishes to take to the kitchen. The rest of us followed, all except for Grace, Tara, and Havoc. As I took the empty tofurkey tray to the door, I looked back, noticing he wasn't being polite and cleaning up. I was about to go scold him, but a hand grabbed my shoulder.

"Don't worry about him. He needs this." Roy's deep voice rumbled softly from his mouth. I looked back, and there was a smirk, but it wasn't meant to be one. He was trying to just smile without looking crude. It made me wonder what happened between Havoc and Grace.

But…why wasn't Roy questioning me like he normally did? It was as if I wasn't suspicious anymore. Was their something changing about me that made him act this way? If so, I had no idea what it was, but it was affecting everybody else too.

I bowed my head and pushed through the door where Kyara and Kari were busy washing dishes. I placed my dish in the sink and watched the bubbles fly up at our faces. One popped on Kari's nose and she squealed with joy. As I was heading out the door Kyara stopped me.

"Hey, we could use two more hands." She said, and held up a pair of rubber gloves with a soapy hand. There was no reason to object, so I slipped them on and began rinsing. "Well, I would say tonight was… interesting."

"Yeah… Havoc had that look on his face."

"I saw it too. And what was with that scowl he gave you Rose?"

I set a clean dish in her hand and shrugged. "I don't know. Like you said, he's been acting weird lately."

"Wow… getting mad at people for no apparent reason… how anger management." Kari said while scrubbing hard at an uneaten plate. Kyara looked at me from the side as she whipped off a dish, as if noticing something's up. All the sudden something dawned on me.

"Kyara, where has Ed been?"

I had no idea the question would shake her as much as it did, for she looked down and went silent. Kari and I stopped doing the dishes all together. She stretched out her hand impatiently, still looking away.

"Hand me another plate." She mumbled.

"How long has he been away? And why?"

"Hand me another plate!" her voice silenced the room, creating an uneasy stillness. I shook my head slowly.

"You'll feel better if you tell us."

Her lip trembled as she slowly set down the towel and moved away from the sink. I could see her eyes glistening with tears ready to drip down her cheek. I put a hand on her shoulder and she fell towards me. I took a step back, surprised, and her arms wrapped around my shoulders as she began sobbing. Kari walked around me and put a hand on her back, so I followed her example and did the same, not knowing how to react. I felt her hot tears soak through my shirt.

"I don't know… he just left…" I could make out through her muffled sobs that began to soak my sleeve. I looked at Kari, asking with my eyes what I should do. She shrugged and rubbed Kyara's back, trying to calm her down. A sigh expelled from my lungs and I finally thought up something to say.

"I'm sure he wouldn't leave without ever coming back… so maybe if you just give him time, he'll be back soon."

The sobs softened as she lifted her head from my shoulder. I took a dry towel from the counter and wiped away the tears on her face, and while doing so, felt so… weird. It was the most peculiar sensation as I helped her, my best friend, and told her to calm down… like some sort of… caring person. I didn't know who exactly would act like this… but for some reason I felt sad thinking of this.

I had never had somebody comfort me like this before. Maybe that was why.

A small smile came across her face, so slight it was barely noticeable, but just noticeable enough to summon my own lips into a smile. She nodded her head and stepped back, mouthing a thank you as she left the room.

"Well… let's go back out to check for more dishes."

I followed Kari outside the opposite door, finding no more dirty dishes at the table, except for Roy, who had his head in his palms and was staring into a flickering candlelight. I thought for sure I could hear Kari's heart rate increase tremendously as she looked at the light reflecting in the boy's eyes. As the door slammed behind us, his head turned to our direction.

"No more dishes for you two ladies." He smiled and scooted away from the table.

"Where's lover boy?" Kari said with a breathy voice. He stood up.

"Went up to his room right after our guests left. Don't know what his problem is…" he said, and for a split second, his eyes shifted from both of us to just me. For that short moment, I felt a huge wave travel up and down my arms, an invisible force that left goose bumps prickling my skin. My hands were burning.

It wasn't the feeling Havoc gave me, but the same nervousness was there.

"Oh!" He turned, looking over at the chair where a brown fleece jacket was hanging on a chair. His feet carried him smoothly across the room to the chair and his large hands lifted up the clothing. "It seems our guests have left something. Maybe I'll go ask Havoc to return it to them…" He looked over in the door's direction and with the first step towards it, I fell right into the palm of his hands.

"I'll take it to them." I said, and rushed over behind the table where he stood looking at me without any surprise. I snatched it from his hands and walked to the doors outside.

Yup. Next chap. Soon, including the ones after(hopefully).