A/N: Twilight belongs to SM, In Venam is all mine. No infringement intended, ya'll.

Imma get all shouty caps for a minute: HIYA NEW FOLLOWERS. I SEE YA THERE, AND I LOVE YOU!

Hold on to your wings, angels. Here we go!

Chapter 19

~IV~

IPOV

I lay there trapped in an odd, hallow silence one moment and deafening roar the next. My body pulled itself apart and stitched itself back together again and again. The place where my wings had once spread wide burned liked coals pressing against my tender skin.

Chaos had become a living, breathing thing that roamed freely through my body.

~IV~

EPOV

"Carlisle, I can't get near her!" I shouted into the phone pressed to my face. "Every time I try, I get thrown across the fucking room." My jaw ached with strain as my teeth ground against each other.

I watched in utter horror as Isabella's body seemed to flicker, moving between translucent and a solid pallor. Head thrown back, she let out a scream worthy of every childhood nightmare.

"Interesting," Carlisle breathed, racing toward the house. I heard the rapid footfalls and the soft crunch of the forest floor through the phone.

"Quantum physics is interesting, Carlisle! Linda Blair over here is fucking terrifying!" I was quickly losing my shit. I couldn't hear her or help her. Nothing about this transformation was normal. I'd seen pain, yes, but what was happening to Isabella was completely unique.

"We're not far now, son."

I closed the phone and let it drop to the floor. I barely heard the thud over the sounds clawing up and out of Isabella's throat.

This can't be right.

I pleaded with any God that would listen to not take her and buckled to the floor. Moments later, I heard the swift movements of Esme and Carlisle as they rushed up the stairs to my room.

"Oh, God." Esme covered her mouth and stared at the fallen angel writhing on the bed. Quickly, she moved toward her wanting to comfort her, but just as I had, Esme hit an invisible wall and bounced back. Carlisle's arm shot out, wrapping around Esme and preventing a collision with the wall.

"About three feet," I said. "Any closer and …" I motioned to the me-sized holes in the walls around the room.

Carlisle's brain kicked into overdrive, thoughts moved too fast for me to fully process them.

"… Transformation … binding protein … supernatural …"

Suddenly he turned toward me, his eyes wide. "What if I was wrong? What if the protein I found in Isabella's blood isn't what I thought it was? The function …" he rambled, pacing and working through his maze of thoughts.

"I'd thought that what I'd found was some sort of combination protein—something that allowed her to take on your venom. But what if I was wrong about its function, Edward?"

Esme and I waited for him to continue. I listened as his thoughts dodged around hidden corners and ran in a completely different direction.

"Her shield, her hearing, her skin," Carlisle rattled off the list as if confirming something to himself. "That protein didn't allow her to endure your venom. It's what makes her supernatural!"

I side-eyed Esme hoping she was following this and begged Carlisle to throw me a bone and explain this to us both.

"Vampires have twenty-five chromosomes. Those excess chromosomes are what make us what we are. Supernatural. More, other. Because Isabella had a normal count it didn't occur to me that her marker—if you will—was elsewhere in her make-up."Carlisle turned a thoughtful eye to Isabella, screeching and clawing at the bed sheets as if they were the only thing that could anchor her.

"What are you saying, Carlisle?" Esme asked, terrified.

"I'm saying I don't know. I … She's already preternatural … I don't think that the venom will … take." Hearing Carlisle lost for words was something I hadn't often witnessed in my time with him. He was normally so confident in what he knew, and what he didn't he analyzed, broke down, and calculated until he did. Esme's hand reached for his and their fingers laced.

Won't … take?

~IV~

APOV

"Think the house is still standing?" Emmett said with a snicker.

"She's human, Em. If the house isn't standing, neither is Isabella." Jasper slung his arm around me in a lazy gesture that always, to me anyway, felt so unlike him. Jazz had his playful, easy going side, but the buddy-like gesture never fit with who he was. Arms wrapped around my waist, hands clasped together, and stolen, secret moments were my Jazz.

"I don't know, man. Four hundred years of sexual repression …" he trailed off, bumping Rose's shoulder.

She shook her head and rolled her eyes. Their push-pull love always made me smile.

Suddenly, the forest around me began to blur like an old photograph. Colours drained and scenery disappeared. I felt Jasper's strong, grounding hands on my shoulders, but what I saw was Edward flying through his room and landing with a hard thud. Isabella was screaming and her naked body was twisting in pain. Esme sat on the floor, her chest heaving and her anguished face turned toward the fallen angel. Slowly, the bedroom dispersed like a fog rolling away and the handsome face of my husband appeared in front of me.

"It's happening. But something's wrong." I shook my head to clear it and looked back to Jasper. "Something's not right with Isabella's transformation."

~IV~

IPOV

I fought desperately to keep the screams inside, but the hell rolling through me made control fucking impossible. Everything burned and tore and shredded into a million tiny pieces only to pull itself together and do it again.

I knew the whole Cullen family had assembled in the room. Between the stitch and tear going on inside me, I would look to their worried faces, seeking mere seconds of solace before my body would arch and twist and my mouth would open wide and let loose a terrifying scream that I could hardly believe came from me.

~IV~

What felt like days passed, and I caught bits and pieces of conversation.

"Edward, pacing the room and refusing to feed isn't going to change the situation," Rose's voice snarked out from across the room.

Colour me surprised. My moody, possessive vampire was being moody and possessive. Who would have thought? I could practically see his lip curl as he snarled, and I wanted to roll my eyes. Rose hissed and grew quiet, and the pain continued its ever persistent, horrible fucking reign over my body. My mouth opened, feeling a scream working its way up my throat, but this time nothing came out. Silence mixed with pain.

"She's lost her voice," I heard Rose explain.

~IV~

The loss of my voice was an odd thing. On one hand, I was happy not to have to hear my own piercing shrike, and surely it eased some of the pain I inflicted on the family with every moan, whimper, and howl. But not being able to express the agony I was feeling was damned frustrating. And yet another side to that coin was the reflection the new silence allowed me.

The connotation surrounding the word angel in this world was both interesting and very different from my understanding of it. Angel, to the human world, was coloured in hues of glory, perfection, kindness, protection, and holier-than-thou idioms, and some of that was true. The need to protect was something that most angels, particularly Guards, were not only very familiar with, but created for.

But in my world angel was synonymous with servitude, loyalty, and obedience. For me Guarding was innate, because it was all I was made to be. But we weren't perfect creatures by any means. I was a wonderful example of that. I'd Fallen, thrown away everything for a beautiful boy with a beautiful heart. It wasn't something I regretted in the least. Falling gave me so much. It opened me to a range of emotions I'd never felt before and a deeper understanding of the human condition. I better understood the motivations behind some actions I'd thought extreme before.

When a true connection with another being was made, emotions became a living, breathing thing. Mothers fought tooth and nail to protect what was theirs. Lovers killed in passionate fits of rage. Friends cried in sympathy. The good, the bad, and the misguided were all the result of strong emotions. Bonds to a person, or even an idea were enough to drive a human to do just about anything. It was why I Fell.

Everything about that green-eyed boy drew me in, pulled new feelings to the surface and made me want things I never should have. But I didn't regret a thing. Every feather lost, every silent scream and twist of pain was worth it. Having Edward, being with him, made me feel more divine than my wings ever had; like a God walking among mere mortals.

~IV~

APOV

It'd been four days and though Isabella's skin continued to move between the ghostly pale and something that, to me, looked like rice paper, the painful sobs had stopped and her body seemed more relaxed. Edward still couldn't reach her mind though and that had him stomping around like a petulant preschooler. He'd never been on the outside before. Not like this.

After much convincing—read: forcefully shoved out the damned door—he finally agreed to feed. Edward had always been a kind hunter. He took his kill swiftly and offered them a quick and peaceful death. He always looked on his food with a kind of reverence, as if he were thankful for what it offered him. And I was sure that was true. He'd killed before, taken human lives, and he hated himself for what he'd been once upon a time. Those animals gave him something he needed without having to take a human life. To him those animals meant never being a monster again.

Today, however was a different story. Today it was about need. Need for sustenance, need to rip and tear and expel his fear and frustration … needing to get back home to his angel and continue his fucking self loathing.

Edward was on a "this is all my fault" bender, and truthfully, it was his fault. His vamp juice created the hot mess lying silently back home. Sugar coat, I would not, but I also wouldn't let him ride the guilt train all by himself.

"Isabella is grown ass angel! She's four hundred and thirty fucking years old, Edward. She wanted this and she knew the risk, so you don't get to march the pity parade solo," I barked at my brother.

"Not one of us stood in her way, Edward. Not one of us said 'don't do this.'" Jasper patted his friend on the shoulder, streaming comfort and ease at the worried vampire. "We all own a piece of that guilt, sir."

Jasper had been invaluable over the last four days: soothing Esme's hurting heart, calming Edward's rage, and taking the edge off of my own anxiety. His gift was truly that. As we walked back toward the house, Edward looking like something out of a horror movie, I reached for Jasper's hand and clutched it tightly.

The house was silent but for the sound of a hammering heart. Isabella's heart rate had always been something of a mystery to Carlisle. When she'd been a Guard, still divine, it was so slow and shallow not even our vampire hears could register it. As she'd become more human, less feathered goddess, it had beat quicker, stronger. Now it pulsed so fast it would surely give to the pressure soon if it didn't slow.

I reached out for the door and as my hand coiled around the brass knob, the sound stopped all together. The silence of her heart was like thunder roaring through a perfectly sunny day. It changed everything in an instant. My breath hitched in my useless lungs, and I tore through the door and up the stairs with four vampires quick on my heels.

Isabella lay motionless the bed, her body dripping in sweat and her skin flushed a violent pink. Slowly, Edward inched forward, his hands shaking. Every being in that room trembled with fear and concern as he approached the pitch line—the point where the Fallen angel's invisible shield would force us back. His toe crept across that line and Edward remained upright. I bit my lip, not knowing if that was a good thing.

Had Edward been pushed away like every other time he'd foolhardily attempted to cross that line, the question of her survival would have been answered. But when nothing happened, it both terrified and excited me. Had the shield dropped simply because it was over, the transformation complete?

"Please," Edward whispered in a desperate voice as he crouched next to the bed. With trembling fingers, he brushed her sweat soaked hair away from her face. "Please, love. Please." His hushed prayers made my long dead heart heavy with hurt. He pulled the bed sheet up, covering her still exposed naked body.

Esme whimpered, clutching Carlisle with all her might, and I was certain that if the burly immortal to my left could cry, he would. A sad, thick stillness cloaked the room like a spider web rooting everyone where they stood.

"Isabella …" Edward mumbled against the skin of her shoulder, lovingly tucking the edge of the sheet under her arm. "Please, angel … stay."

I wanted nothing more than to turn away from the scene unfolding in front of me, but like a train wreck, my eyes refused to the leave wreckage. Jasper's hand gripped mine and the sorrow that ran through him, ran through me.

"No," Rose said, resolute and marching toward the still angel and anguished vampire. She drew her fist back and let it land hard on Isabella's chest.

There was a unified gasp as we all watched. Seconds later, Isabella lurched upright, her mouth hanging open wide with shock and fear. Her eyes were big and equally as stunned.

A smile burst across Edward's face as he leaned into her, meeting her wild eyes. Wild, orange eyes. Deep, burning orange. Not newbie red; hybrid, ex-angel, fiery ginger. They were beautiful and absolutely dazzling.

Edward's mouth opened, likely to thank the fucking lords above for her recovery, but before a word could be spoken, Isabella clutched her stomach and leaned over the bed. Making a horrid retching sound, she opened her mouth and blood poured freely like an open faucet.

Rose and Edward jumped back at the same time, barely missing the thick splash of crimson fluid pooling on the white carpet.

"Oh my god!" Esme whimpered next to me.

"What the fuck?" Rose looked on, confused as all get out.

Edward moved next to Isabella, holding her shoulders and whispering words of comfort in her ear. His eyes, heavy with torment, landed on Carlisle. "What's happening?" he begged for an answer.

"I … I don't know, son." Carlisle stretched his head in a helpless gesture.

Edward snarled loudly, jaw clenched, frame visibly shaking. "What do I do, Carlisle?!" Edward's ability to remain calm ceased about four days ago, so no one was really surprised by the reaction.

Ladies and gentlemen, please keep your arms and legs in the car while the ride is in motion. And please ensure your seatbelt is firmly engaged. It's going to be bumpy fucking ride.

I felt my whole body brace for something terrible. Tension poured into me like cold concrete, leaving my body heavy and my mind slow. I could feel Edward's anguish, Rose's confusion, and Esme's sorrow. I released my grip on Jasper and turned to him. "Jazz, take a breath." He was acting like a conduit, overwhelmed and allowing all the emotion in the room to flow through him to everyone around him.

"Carlisle!" Edward shouted. Blood continued to pool on the floor.

Emmett stepped forward, standing to the side of Isabella, he crouched down. "Listen," he said, looking from the fallen angel to Carlisle.

"I've never seen this before. This isn't normal," Carlisle rambled, shaking his head and looking to his wife's beautiful, comforting face.

"Listen!" Emmett shouted. "Everyone calm the fuck down, and listen."

I did as he said. I closed my mind, shut down the worry swirling through it, and opened my ears. I heard the sloshy sound of the blood, the soft gurgle from Isabella's raw throat, the rustle of sheets as Edward shifted position. And then it hit me. No heart beat.

"Her heart stopped." I looked to Emmett, my head cocked.

He nodded, giving me a look that clearly said thanks for catching up. "Yet here she is, spewing blood. Ladies and gentle vampires, I think we've got a living dead girl … er … angel."

Rose was suddenly beaming and some of the confusion in the room began to break up.

"Now, I'm no doctor, but I think she's puking up all her blood rather than using it like we would in our first few months. Carlisle, you told me our human blood is what makes us all crazy strong in the beginning, like steroids?"

Carlisle nodded, still watching Isabella. The flow had slowed to mere trickle and she'd begun to right herself, leaning back against Edward.

"Wings doesn't need it, so her body's getting rid of it. Nasty fucking job of it too, my un-feathered friend." Emmett's big palm gripped her shoulder and he offered her a big, easy smile. "You're cleaning this up."

~IV~

IPOV

I chuckled weakly, wiping the blood away from my mouth. My throat burned as if it had been crammed full of hot coals. I pulled in a deep breath and felt an odd hollow sucking in my lungs, like they didn't know what to do with the oxygen. The sensation was something that would take some getting used to but it certainly wasn't painful, just really fucking odd.

Next to me, Edward's body slumped a little as fear and tension drained from him. His hand swept across my bare shoulder. "I thought I'd lost you."

My body relaxed as if slipping back into my skin for the first time in days and my mind cleared. I closed my eyes, smiled softly, and let the thought drift away from me.

"Not a chance."

End Notes:

There'll be a short epilogue coming soon, but that's it people. The feathers have all fallen away, the bad guys defeated and the vampire-angel-human hybrid lives. And now I'm sad, 'cause I hate endings. Thank you all so much for you love and wonderful reviews. You should see the ridiculous happy dances I do when I get review notifications.

I'm on Twitter JanuarysFiction, we can ramble, share p0rn. I'm also up on FictionPad now, too. LOVING that site! Go check it out if you haven't.

Jen