A/N: You would've had this much earlier if would've let me post it. Sorry for keeping you waiting so long.
I went to the 100 Monkeys show Rock City Studios last week, so if any of you are fans of the boys (or Jackson), I'll post the link to my pics on my profile.This chapter is another long one, sorry! Also, there is a lot going on. Please forgive Jasper's mouth, he's just a little upset. :)
"Thank you. Bella, I—I love you." My world stopped when I heard him utter those three words to me. The most beautiful symphony I'd ever heard. They meant so much to me, and I knew of only one way to repay him; "I love you too, Jasper."
The kisses lasted for a long time, leading us back to the floor in the clearing. I brought him to his release. He brought me mine one more time. It was perfect; he was perfect. I wanted nothing more than to give him all of me; so I offered it. "Jasper, please. Take me. Make me yours, fully."
He froze, taking in what I had just said. Considering it, I'm sure. Unfortunately, his response was not the one I wanted. "I will Bella. But not here, not like this. Not on the dirty floor of a forest. Your first time will be special Darlin'. And it will be soon."
I smiled at this, feeling no rejection like the times before. He was right. We were gonna do this the right way. We left after that, me cradled in his arms as he sped us home. I couldn't wait to walk through the door, hand in hand, and proclaim our love to the world. We'd finally be together! I couldn't wait.
As we reached the end of the forest where we could see the house, he put me down. He held my hand and looked deep into my eyes and said four words: "Not tonight. Let's wait."
So I slapped him.
Seriously, fuck this day!
---
A Beautiful Mess
Chapter 20
My Life is Over
I glanced down at the beautiful, albeit slightly crazy, woman in front of me. I didn't feel any of the emotions that I expected to feel; no anger, no rage. I didn't even have to chant my standard 'never hit a woman, never hit a woman' mantra that I had to use every time Rose or Alice hit me. It was like she got a free pass to do whatever she wanted to me and she'd still be the person that I want to spend forever with. I was just concerned about her hand; it has to be throbbing by now. "Are you okay Doll?"
"Screw you Jasper," she spat before storming off toward the house. I caught her quickly.
"Would you let me explain?"
"No, I won't. I'll go upstairs, take a shower and begin ruing the day I ever let you into my life," she said, completely serious. Though how anyone can utter the word 'rue' seriously is beyond me. I grabbed her arm, "You don't mean that."
"You sure about that?" She asked lethally. I smirked at her, "Empath, remember?" I told her, wiggling my eyebrows and angering her further. Great. "I feel your pain Darlin', but now is not the right time."
"Yeah, well the right time better get here very soon Empath. My patience is wearing thin. Can you feel that too?" Of course I could. In fact, her emotions today have been a storm. She feels like a mentally unstable person and I'm worried that she might snap. With everything she's been through lately, I wouldn't blame her.
"Soon, Babe. I promise," I told her softly, leaning in for a kiss. She turned her head from me, pulled her arm from my grasp, and stormed into the house. I didn't miss her muttered 'stupid fucking indecisive vampire' either. This day just keeps getting' better and better.
I sighed and ran my hands through my hair for a few moments, trying to center myself and calm down. Knowing it wasn't working, I gave up and made my way in the house. As soon as I stepped in the door I was attacked by Emmett's questions, questions that I didn't have answers for yet. This whole situation seems entirely fucked up. I shot him a glare that promptly shut him up and made my way into my shower.
The warm water only made me think of Bella, so I showered at the speed of light and was soon dressed and lying on my bed, hands behind my head, trying to calm down and analyze the fucked up chain of events that led me here. Before I had time to come up with any kind of logic regarding the mess, I heard Esme and Carlisle enter the house. I rushed downstairs, knowing that Rose and Emmett were ready to spill their guts and my patience level could only handle rehashing the events of the night once. "Not a word," I silenced them. "Let's sit and wait for the traitors to get home so we only have to do this once."
They could hear in my voice that I wasn't fucking around, and rather than deal with me, they followed me into the dining room. Carlisle looked to be barley containing himself, his curiosity and worry growing with each tick of the clock. Bella joined five minutes later and we sat in an awkward silence for another five before we heard them approaching. Everyone's emotions picked up and I did my best to block them all out. I stood near the door and waited for them to enter.
Alice stopped abruptly when she saw me, a look of shame plastered on her tiny face, and ducked her head as she went to join the others. Edward entered next, and I wasted no time before I clocked him one, dropping his dumb ass to the floor and leaving him there as I joined my family at the table. Esme was shocked, Carlisle holding her back from attending to her punk-ass son; he really is a smart man. Everyone else looked smug, aside from Alice who hung her head.
Thirty seconds later, Edward joined us at the table. "I guess I deserved that." Rose snorted. I fought with myself to keep from giving him just what he really deserved. Little bitch.
"Alright, that's it. Would somebody care to tell me what the hell is going on here?" Carlisle had apparently reached the end of his rope. Everyone stared at me, expectantly. Great. I tried to center myself, not wanting to scare my parents with my words, but the sight of Edward and Alice across from me was making it very hard. Apparently my silence lasted too long, because Bella decided to fill them in.
"Well, Pops, to make a long story short, Jasper and I were attacked in the forest by Laurent and some big ass blonde dude. They were sent by Victoria, who knew that it was Jasper that killed James and not Edward. She wanted both of us brought to her alive, but Laurent was ready to kill Jasper when Barbie and Ken came through and saved the day. Jasper was all prepared to give Laurent his just-deserts when Dumb and Dumber showed up and begged him not to kill him. And now, here we are."
Shocked gasps rang through the room as I Esme and Carlisle got the gist of what went down. My mood improved as I suppressed a chuckle at Bella's nicknames and the fact that Carlisle and Esme knew her well enough to know who she was talking about. I smiled at her, but she glared at me. Oh yeah, she's mad at me. Damn.
After he recovered from the shock of Bella's words, Carlisle asked exactly what I though he would; "Why did you guys beg for his mercy? Why spare him?"
"Oh yeah, they didn't want to piss off those Denali cunts you guys are so fond of," Bella answered bluntly. Esme looked like she was about to faint. 'What do you mean?"
"I'm sorry Esmom, but you're gonna have to ask these assholes for that information. It still confounds me." Obviously, Bella wouldn't be forgiving them anytime soon.
Esme never took her eyes off of Bella, obviously sensing her hurt and instability. She simply hissed, "Explain," and soon enough we were hearing the other side of the story.
Alice, head still hanging, began the tale; "We decided to pay a quick visit to the Denali's before coming home since they aren't too far away. Right when we arrived, the girls were frantic. Irina had found a note from Laurent, saying that he loved her but had to take care of a certain Empath and human that had wronged him in the past. They quickly realized who he was after and that they may have given him just the information he needed to find what he wanted. They felt terrible, but knew that Jasper would be able to protect himself and Bella. They didn't know he had another with him. They were worried that Jasper would kill Laurent and said that if a Cullen were to kill a member of their family, they'd have to choice but to seek vengeance."
"Oh my goodness, that's just horrible! How could they? I love them like family. What a sad, sad day. I'll have to call Carmen and try and mend this," Esme said, the sadness radiating off her in thick waves.
"Carmen and Eleazar are out of the country. As far as we know, they are not involved. But I don't think that there is any coming back from this. On our way home, we received a call from them warning us that Laurent decided to leave the coven and join Victoria. They now blame us for his abandonment. I don't believe they wish to harm us, but all ties have seemingly been severed," Edward explained.
The stupid fucking rat bastard! I slammed my fist on the table, cracking it. "So you mean I let him go free just so that he could have a better chance at killing Bella? You stupid piece of shit! Do you realize what you've done?" I screamed, furious. Edward cowered, knowing I was right.
"Now he knows my skills. He knows Bella's! We've just given them the boost they needed. I should fucking kill you for that shit!"
"Jasper, enough. Your brother was only trying to protect the family. We need to stick together right now, because from what I've gathered, Victoria is after us and seems to have minions fighting her battles. Who knows how many are at her disposal. Now, please, explain to me what you meant by 'Bella's skills' son," Carlisle finally piped in. Of course that's what concerns him.
"The blonde had the power to block sound from escaping; we couldn't call for help. Bella blocked him. Right? Isn't that what happened Bella?" I asked her, not really sure, only having assumed.
"Uh, yeah. I guess. It didn't work at first, but I was finally able to do it. I only blacked out for a little while this time," she answered timidly.
"Well, that is just great Bella. So you were able to use your voice and you called Emmett and Rose?" He asked her, loving this.
"Yeah, I guess. Although it might have been Jasper's growls that got their attention. They were louder," she said sheepishly, embarrassed by his praise.
"Wait, Jasper could speak too?" She nodded. He thought for a moment. "Well that just shows that your bond still stands from Phoenix. Amazing," Carlisle declared, pensively. I smiled, inwardly of course.
"Uh, I could actually hear Rose too. It was right before he was killed, but I definitely heard her," Bella told us. "Yeah, I could hear them too. They were yelling for me to hold on, that they were on the way," I explained, confused at how this was possible.
"Maybe you blocked him from using his gift, instead of shielding us," Emmett added, and it sounded plausible to me. I looked to Carlisle. "That is a very good theory Emmett. I'll have to look into it." Emmett beamed.
I looked around the room. All eyes were on me, including Bella's. I can't believe I almost lost her today. I fought like a complete amateur, wanting only to get to Bella. I could've lost her because I was too worried about protecting her. That can't happen again. Getting caught off guard really fucked me up. I have to be ready; we all have to be ready. Time to formulate a plan.
"Alright, now that we've figured that out, it's time to come up with a game plan. Our allies are gone and Victoria is after us. Alice, can you see her at all?" I'd transitioned into Major-mode and protecting Bella was my number one objective.
"No, damn it! I can't see hardly anything anymore!" She was frustrated; I didn't have time to deal with it.
"Alright, here's the plan. Pay attention," I told them, giving them a play by play of how we were going to protect our girl. We decided that we'd leave in the morning since they knew where we were and we'd feel safer at home; plus, Bella wanted to make sure nothing happened to Charlie or Jake.
Once our game plan was down pact, Bella retired for the night and we went out to hunt and patrol in shifts. Bella slept alone, stating that she wasn't in the mood for company. I took this as my cue to leave her be; hopefully we can talk it out when we get home.
---
T-minus one hour until were back in Forks and I can get out of this fucking car!
You'd think it would be great; since Edward and Alice pissed everyone off, we nominated them to ride back with Esme and Carlisle. But no, everyone's emotions are bordering on panic, aside from Bella's, that is, whose are cycling so frequently that I don't know what to make of them. Then, to add insult to injury, she won't talk to me. She's avoiding my glances, leaning away from my touch, ignoring my pleas for conversation; fucking teenagers! Rose continues to send me pitying looks from the front and Emmett is as oblivious as the sky is blue. I mean, really? How dense can he be?
When he started singing some stupid rap song I really wanted to slap him, so, in an effort to keep from injuring him, I began going over our plan of defense. Bella would never be alone. Whether at home, school, work or out and about, one of us would always be with her or near by. We weren't taking any chances. We'd pull shifts keeping watch at night and patrolling the area surrounding Forks.
We'd also be trying to track Victoria down. We figured it would be better to keep her away from us and seek her out instead, but nobody was willing to leave Bella for too long. So, we'd do what we could and hope for the best. All I know is that I would kill every living thing on Earth to keep Bella safe; that red-headed bitch had no idea who she was dealing with.
The buzzing of Bella's phone pulled me from my thoughts, which was good because I was getting angry again. She ignored the call without a glance at the caller info. It rang again and she did the same thing. I was sad; she looked so broken, so frightened. If her emotions were any indication, she was mentally very fragile; it wouldn't take much to push her over the edge.
This time, the caller changed tactics and sent a text message. After a minute or two, she finally gave in a read it... And there she goes.
Bella's emotions were crazed; slightly hysterical. "What happened? What's wrong?" I asked her, trying not to let her emotional state effect me.
"Charlie's friend, Harry. He was just killed," she told me in a small, cracking voice.
"How? How did he die?" I was growing irrational, my fear that Victoria was in Forks increasing with every passing second. Rose swerved a little, clearly affected by my fear. Emmett simply got angry; he was ready to fuck somebody up.
The next two words out of her mouth set us both into motion, jumping from the car and telling Rose to alert the others. We ran as fast as we could, hoping to catch whoever had done this and stop further lives from being lost. I pushed myself harder than I thought I could as I ran towards the exact danger that I was trying to save my family from. I'd face it head on willingly, as long as Bella was safe. All because she had muttered the exact two words that I'd been fearing; "Animal attack."
Please, please, please let me catch this bitch.
*
But we didn't. We picked up her scent and tried to chase her down, but it had disappeared at the road; she must've had someone waiting as her get away driver. We could've split up and continued to search for her, but we figured it would be better to get back to the family in case it was some kind of trick.
We hunted on the way back, not knowing if this would turn into a fight to the death or a waiting game, but wanting to be prepared either way. Rose informed us that Carlisle, Esme, Edward and Alice would stay at the Swan's for awhile and she'd meet us at the house. Then, the three of us sat and waited for the others to return; it was torture.
My pacing was leaving a mark on Esme's hardwood floor when we finally heard them drive up. Esme entered first followed by an angry Edward; what else is new?
"How is she? Is everything okay?" I was desperate for some information.
"Bella's doing okay," Esme explained. "But Charlie, Billy and Jacob aren't doing so well. They were all close to Harry and his death is hitting them very hard. Bella's trying to be strong for them. Alice stayed over to help out and keep an eye on things, but one of you should head over to help her out."
"I'll go!" I shouted before I had a chance to rein it in. Everyone glanced at me like I was crazy. Shit… Think fast!
"What? So I can help with their grief," I explain my faux-reason. They fell for it. Good.
"That sounds great honey. Carlisle is at the hospital now, but should be back soon. Then the rest of us will patrol the area and see if we can find anything to help us."
"Perfect. Emmett will fill you in on what we found. I'll see you guys later," I exclaimed, trying to get out if there and to Bella as quickly as possible. But I wasn't free yet; Edward grabbed my arm, stopping me. "Keep her safe, please?"
"She's my best friend Edward, I'm not gonna let anything happen to her. Why aren't you there, anyways?" Please say she made you leave. Please say she made you leave.
"She asked me to go. So since I can't be there, can you just keep her alive? You obviously do a much better job at it than me," he looked sad. I couldn't care less. "Yes, I do. And yes, I will." And then I was gone.
*
When I got to the house, Bella was the first person I saw. She was in sweats and a too big t-shirt with her hair pulled into a ponytail. He eyes were red and her cheeks were flushed; she had been crying. Not okay.
She stood with Jake, holding his hand and rubbing circles on his back. Next to them stood their fathers, talking intently about something I couldn't bother to listen to. All I wanted to do was hold my girl and make her feel better. Once the conversation was over, Jake hugged his father, and then a tall boy that I recognized from around the town walked over to help him in the car. I could see two other young men in the car, and when he opened the door to help Billy in, the smell that radiated from it was repugnant. It made me a little upset. I was confused about my reaction and the horrible stench, but Bella's tiny, warm hand on my shoulder made me forget all thoughts of it. "Jay, what are you doing here?"
"Really Bee? What do you think?" She gave me a 'don't mess with me right now' look, so I threw one right back at her.
"I thought I made my feelings quite clear the other night," she said through clenched teeth. Really? Is she fucking kidding me?
I tried to remain a gentleman, plus, Alice was somewhere in the vicinity and didn't want her to hear anything she shouldn't. "Quite the contrary my dear. Why don't you explain them to me, 'cause I can't figure them out for the life of me."
"I'm not jumping off my horse until you're off yours and ready to catch me," she explained, glaring at me.
"Well that's quite selfish; who's gonna catch me?" I asked her, quirking my eyebrow in a fashion that showed her I wasn't too happy with this conversation.
"You're a big boy' you can handle the fall," she smirked at me. No fucking way! She can't be serious...
"And you're a big girl. Though I'd thought the plan was to jump together; catch each other. When did the plans change?"
"When I was ready to jump with you and you fucking bailed on me. That's when!" She played the part of angry, but I could feel her pain. I'd hurt her. She was right; she was ready and I punked out. Regardless of my reasons, which were very logical in my eyes, she had stepped up to the plate and I left her hanging. Damn it, I hate being wrong.
I ran my hands through my hair and sighed, dreading the next words out of my mouth. "You're right."
She whipped her head at me, "What?" I pulled her close and whispered in her ear, making sure only she would hear me.
"I said you're right. I'm sorry. I know that was a big step that you were ready to take for me. As far as me jumping; I'm ready and willing, whether or not you are. I'm just waiting for the right time Doll, and right now is not it. You understand, right?" I was just ready to start my new life, with Bella by my side and Victoria a pile of ashes.
She thought for awhile and I gave her the time she needed to process what I'd said. "I don't like it, but I understand it. I'll be jumping soon. Very soon," she said, smiling sadly at me. I returned it. Just then, the sky darkened and thunder sounded throughout the night. Great.
The rain came out of nowhere and we both hauled ass inside, laughing as I shut the door behind us. I brushed a fallen lock behind her ear and we simply stood there, transfixed by each other. Jacob's ungraceful ass is what finally broke us out of our spell.
"Just can't get rid of you Cullen's, can we?" He joked.
"Hey, don't be such an ass Jackoff!" Bella chastised him, quite irate. Jake was just fucking with me, but yes, my dick twitched at her defending me; no matter how unnecessary her anger was.
He looked at me in shock and we both laughed. "Chill Iz, I was playing. I like this guy; it's the little one who I could do without. Oh, and your girlfriend."
"Girlfriend?" I asked, confused and intrigued.
"Yeah, Edwardo. He's a marshmallow. He needs to man up. Always all weepy; like a lost puppy. Makes me sick. You need a real man Iz," he said, moving his eyebrows in my direction. Have I mentioned how much I like Jake?
I just laughed at him, as did Bella, and clapped him on the shoulder; "Well, expect to see a lot of my mug around. With a wild animal running around, we gotta look after our girl here."
"I thought that's what I was here for; but I don't mind you or Emmett, hell, even Ma and Pa Cullen are cool. Just keep the rest of your family away from me, please!" I felt his desperation.
"I'll try. Just be glad you can go home and get away from them. I'm stuck with 'em." I told him, not entirely kidding.
"Well, for the next week or so, this is home. So try hard, okay?" Huh? Bella must've felt my confusion. "Billy had to take a couple of the boys from the rez to see an elder in Seattle. They are coming down with some weird illness that nobody here can cure, and he thinks this elder will be able to help. So Jake is staying here for awhile," she explained.
While I was glad that Bella would get to spend some time with Jake, that just meant that he was one more person that we'd have to keep safe. "Hopefully he'll be able to get back for the funeral," Bella added, absentmindedly. At these words, the atmosphere in the room changed.
Jake's grief and sadness encapsulated him, sending him to the couch with his head in his hands. He wasn't dealing with this loss very well. Bella followed, trying to comfort him and feeling her own pain at the sight of Jake's, mixed with guilt and anger. All because of Victoria!
All of the emotions were effecting me, and even through them I was certain of one thing; I was gonna find the bitch and tear her limb from limb. Immediately, if not sooner.
---
The next few days passed in a blur of activity. I was an almost constant figure at the Swan household, and Charlie seemed nothing but thankful. Between the hunt for the animal that had killed one of his best friends and doing all that he could to help his family, Charlie hardly spent anytime at the house.
Wednesday, the day after the death, was a somber day. Bella and Jake slept for most of the day, probably both exhausted by their emotional states. When they awoke, I had donuts and sweet coffee drinks that Alice insisted on buying ready for them; which they spared no time inhaling. After that, the two of them spent the rest of the day watching favorite movies of theirs and I split my time between watching them amusedly and scanning the area for the red-head who held a permanent position at the top of my shit list.
Alice and Edward also visited that day, relieving me and irritating Jacob. Bella was pleased to see Alice, but almost disgusted with Edward. Later that night she shared with me how miserable she was with him. She wanted out, but was having a hard time ending it. She didn't want to hurt him.
I had to hand it to my brother however; he was a persistent little fucker. He never gave up. Flowers filled the house and chocolates, perfumes, cards, poems and stuffed animals. He was trying to keep her as hard as his immature mind knew how; unfortunately for him, these material items only pissed Bella off more. Idiot.
That day there was no sign of Victoria or any other vampire in the area. The next day, however, was different. Harry's funeral was held on the reservation, which meant none of us could watch over her. We did the best thing we could; constant patrol of the borders of La Push and Bella on high alert. The day passed safely with no threat of attack, but as the evening arrived, I was feeling uneasy. Bella and Jake were headed home from the wake, a friend of Jake's was driving them because apparently they were trashed. Great, drunken Bella. That should be fun.
I was standing outside Bella's house in the rain, pacing wildly and waiting impatiently for them to show up when I got the call. "We picked up a scent. It's fresh but the rain will make it hard to track him." Rosalie told me as soon as I answered.
"Him? Who? Laurent?"
"Yes."
"Fuck! Go! All of you. Find him and bring him back to me." And then I hung up. They knew what to do. Just then, the bad driver with stringy hair pulled up with my girl. I frantically rushed them inside and put on a pot of coffee.
Yep, they were definitely three sheets to the wind. I couldn't believe it. I wouldn't peg Bella for a drinker, but this didn't seem like it was the first time they partook in this sort of inebriation. Luckily they were happy drunks, alternating from giggling to discussing the silliest of topics. Their giddiness had me longing for a shot of my own and completely forgetting that my family was out chasing after Laurent. Their emotions were affecting me in the best way possible, and after I poured them some coffee, I sat down to join in their antics.
I was enjoying the show, but was glad I was the only one around to see it. Bella surely wouldn't want the family to see her in this state. But, when I saw a flash of red outside the kitchen window I realized what I fool I'd been. I'd sent them all away, after one vampire, leaving me the sole defender of both Bella and Jake.
Silently, I flitted over to the window, peering out and hoping I was mistaken. Victoria wasn't here. Not now. She couldn't be. If so, I was screwed.
But then I saw her, high atop a tree in the forest, her hair blowing in the wind like a torch and she was staring directly at me; a challenge. Son of a bitch!
She'd tricked us, using Laurent as bait. Now she was here, challenging me with her icy glare and I had two drunk humans to protect. What do I do? Do I chase after her? What if she has someone else with her; another trick. I can't leave them unprotected. But can I stay here? She could have us surrounded. I won't be able to fight multiple vampires off and look after Bella; look what happened last time. Fuck! You really stepped in it this time Whitlock.
I quickly opened my cell phone, not taking my eyes of off Victoria in case she tried something. She was emitting nothing but a raw need for vengeance and that frightened me a little. I dialed Rose and muttered three simple words; "Get here, now!" I knew they'd come, but would I have enough time?
As Bella and Jake continued to joke, oblivious to the impending danger, I came up with a plan; scare her enough to stall until my family arrived.
Our eyes were still locked as I began to unbutton my shirt. She was confused, but still determined. Once my shirt was off, I broke my gaze with her and made my way outside. I walked out like a predator to its prey, eyes black as coal and a fierce growl growing in my chest. As soon as she got a look at my marred chest, I felt her fear. She knew what these meant, what I was capable of. I decided to help her along, sending her wave after wave of fear with an addition of wonder; thus, scared shitless but wholly intrigued, she stayed glued to her spot. And so, we continued our silent stare down. Venom filled my mouth as I fought off the urge to attack her.
I knew it wouldn't be much longer until my family got there and I couldn't wait. This was too easy; like taking candy from a baby. Unfortunately, Bella's clumsy ass had to go and trip over her own two feet in the house, distracting me just enough for Victoria to gain a firm grasp on her emotions. I silently cursed my luck as she fled the scene and I was powerless to chase after her. Laurent was still out there somewhere and God only knows who else she had with her. I had to stay.
I didn't move, didn't breathe, didn't speak until I heard them approaching. Edward was first of course, and I quickly told him all he needed to know; "She ran. Get them inside with Bella and then follow me. I'm going after her." And then I was gone.
Unfortunately, the wetness made her scent hard to follow and I lost her; again. By the time Edward caught up to me I was pulverizing a poor, unknowing deer to ease the murderous fury within me. Emmett came bounding through a few moments later and, defeated, we headed back the way we came.
*
The next day was spent nursing massive hangovers and catching Bella up on the events she missed. She was pissed to have put herself in such a venerable place, but said she enjoyed the release the alcohol had given her. Her emotions had been in a near-constant storm and they were hard for even me to decipher. Edward was smothering her, Jake and Charlie were grief-stricken, Victoria was trying to kill her, and then there's me. I didn't blame the girl, but I needed her to be strong. She was trying.
Carlisle and Esme went hunting that night as they hadn't been in awhile. Edward and Alice also insisted on going on their own short hunting trip, which pissed me off. There was no need for them to leave at a time like this when it wasn't at all vital. Drain a fucking deer and get over it; Bella's in trouble, assholes!
With our numbers cut in half, we stuck together that night, all three of us going over to Bella's for a video game tournament. Rose did Bella's nails and they spent some well needed girl time while Emmett kicked our asses in every video game we played. Fucking showoff.
Rose stayed the night while Emmett patrolled outside, giving me a much needed break from it all. I took some time to hunt and then went back to the house to shower, change and think. The next day came so quickly that it shocked me. I'd had Emmett drop of a gift to Bella for me, but other than that I'd spent the day holed up in my study. I was disappointed in my constant failure and full of self loathing. I had Bella's favorite black cowboy hat covering my face when Edward knocked on the door.
"Hey Jasper. Alice sent me to summon you for the party. Rose went to collect Bella and Jake and they'll be here any second," he said, hurriedly. He did not want to go to this party. Either did I. Damn it, I could already tell today was gonna be one of those days. I grumbled my acknowledgement, but he didn't go anywhere.
"Uh, Jasper?" What the hell does he want now? "Do you, by any chance, have a western hat I can borrow? I forgot to get an outfit and Alice will kill me--" he said, stopping mid sentence when I threw my hat that was covering my face at him. He left the room quickly after he grabbed it. Smart boy.
I dragged myself out of bed and threw on a pair of worn, snug Levi's, a brown plaid button up over a tan undershirt, leaving the buttons open and rolling up the sleeves, my brown boots and my straw fedora. Western enough for tonight.
When I got downstairs, I was suddenly in a brighter mood. I had to work very hard to stifle the laughter that was threatening to break free at the scene before me.
Emmett was clad in the canon western sheriff uniform, from the studded boots to the cheesy gold star. He looked like a walking caricature. Alice was clad in the whole jean skirt and vest get up with pink boots and hat. Really? Pink? Ridiculous. And she was staring very disapprovingly at Edward, whose idea of western wear was his standard jeans and black t-shirt with a cowboy hat on his head.
When Emmett attempted a trick with the plastic guns, trying to draw them for the imaginary duel taking place in his head, and accidentally threw one of the guns into one of Esme's vases, I couldn't control myself. Laughter erupted from me at such a high intensity that all of us were soon giggling and trying to stay upright. It felt good to enjoy some time with Edward and Alice after such stressful times.
All the laugher vanished, however, when the door swung open and the rest of our party walked in the room. Everyone just stood there and stared. Rose looked way too fucking good in a barely there Indian-style fringed dress with thigh high suede boots; if she was my woman, she'd never leave the house looking that sexy. And then there was Bella. And I wanted to go back in time and shut myself up, because she was looking especially yummy tonight. She had a pair of short jean shorts on, with a black and gray plaid shirt that was at least two sizes too small for her. It was so tight that it showed a couple inches of her stomach and barley contained her breasts. Add all that to the gray boots I'd just gifted her with, the twin braids framing her face and the red lips, I don't think I'm making it through this night! Thank you Jesus!
And then I remembered Edward and Alice were here. Damn it! I'm gonna need a drink to handle this shit.
"Well shit, I don't really feel all that comfortable with you guys staring at me like that," Jacob said, breaking the ice and causing the girls to giggle. "Now, let's get this show on the road. I need to find me a cute little thing to keep me company tonight." He said, this time making us guys laugh. It was then that I realized they'd been drinking again.
"Howdy ya'll! We're fixin' ta throw back a couple more before we hit the open road," Bella tried in a horrible southern imitation. I couldn't help but laugh at her adorable ass; but Eddie didn't seem too happy about her current state.
She pulled an almost empty bottle of Patron out of her purse and made her way into the kitchen; we all followed. I assumed that this had been their fuel the past couple of days. "Shoot!" She said, "No shot glasses!"
"That's alright, Iz. We can just chug," Jake said, swiping the bottle and taking a big gulp and then passing it to Bella. Edward stopped her, of course.
"I think you've had enough Isabella." She looked at him like he had grown two heads. "First of all, Edward, don't ever touch my Patron," she snatched it back from him. "And secondly, stop being such a sissy boy. We're pregaming. Get with the program." Ah, this shit is just too good!
He sulkingly gave it back to her. "And why are you wearing Jasper's hat?" She asked, but she cut off his response. "I love this hat," she said, lost in thoughts while running her had across it.
"To the hat!" Jake said, raising up an invisible glass. "To the hat!" She replied, gulping down the rest of the bottle. "Oh no! Empty!" She whined. Jake mimicked her sad face. These two are seriously fucking comical.
Suddenly Emmett dashed into the pantry and swiftly returned. "Pregame away my friends!" He said, setting a new bottle of Patron and two shot glasses on the counter.
"Emmett!" Edward hissed.
"Chill dude. They're having fun. Ease up. I won't let anything happen to her."
"Oh Yogi! You're my hero!" Bella gushed. Yes, I was jealous.
"Wait, why do you guys have this? You don't drink!" I'm glad she kept her words thoughtful with Jake around.
"Sure we do, just not very often," Rose told her.
"You do? How? Why don't I know this?" She was shocked. I guess it never came up...
Everyone stood in an awkward silence. "Well, then what the hell are you guys waiting for? Shots for everyone!"
"Hell yeah!" Jake and Emmett shouted at the same time.
Bella looked to Rose while Em got the extra glasses. "What the hell!" She said, gaining claps from Bella. Alice giggled and pulled me over to join them. "We're in!" She said and I winked at Bella. Emmett finished pouring the shots and we all waited excitedly. It'd been way too long since we'd had a drink. Edward, of course, stood off to the side, staring disapprovingly at our display.
"Come on Edwardo, you're missing out on all the fun," Jake called to him. Edward was not happy. "What's wrong? Too much of a light weight?" Edward ignored his taunting.
"Yeah, come on Edward. Take the stick out of your ass and have a drink with us," Bella joined in. He said nothing. "Please?" She said, sweetly with big eyes. Got him.
*
The horrible music was thumping wildly through the crowed house. Lust and joy emanated from all corners, joining with excitement to make quite the cocktail of emotions. The abundance of tequila I'd consumed was making everything remarkably tolerable and I was actually enjoying myself. Everyone was.
Me, Edward, Emmett, Jake and Ben sat on a couch and watched our girls put on a show for us; though I'm sure everyone thought I was watching Alice. Angela had immediately floated over to us and embraced Bella; she really did care about her. Jessica soon joined, her eye on Jake and we've been one big, happy, drunk family ever since. The girls danced together while we watched and enjoyed the view.
Then, Eric had to go and kill it by putting on a slow song. Really? Ugh! Our respective dates grabbed us, wanting to dance, but as soon as Jake stood up, he came crashing back down. None of us could get to him in time without looking inhuman so we had to let him fall. Luckily he didn't hurt anything. He was wasted; out for the night. He mumbled something about cowgirls and then became completely incoherent. I felt a spike of mischievousness shoot through Bella, and before I knew it, she had conned Edward into taking Jake home and tucking him in. Atta girl.
Edward reluctantly agreed and when he asked if any of us would accompany him, the only one who agreed was Alice, stating the need to get away from Bella and see if she could see anything about Victoria or Laurent. Sounds good to me. Edward didn't really want to leave Bella, but she assured him that she'd just dance with Rose and the boys while he was gone and he felt better about it. Dumbass.
We danced, but it was completely innocent; like a dance between two friends. If only they could hear the shit we whispered in each others ears. Yeah, not so friendly.
It's a good thing Em and Rose had slipped out to handle some 'business'. In fact, our conversation was so steamy, I was already making plans for our first time together in my head. I'd do it right with roses, massage oil, strawberries, champagne; you know, all the cliché pansy shit. Whatever it takes to get me in the tiny ass shorts of hers.
My mind was still on making Bella mine when my phone rang. Esme. "Is everything okay Mom?" I asked, stepping outside to take the call and dragging Bella with me.
"Technically, yes, but we just got home and we smelled them. They were both here. It seems to be less than an hour old." Fuck! Well, there goes my buzz.
"Shit! Edward and Alice just went to drop Jake off; I'll have Alice stay with him. Will you go join her and watch after him?" I asked her, trying to formulate a plan.
"Yes. I'm on my way. Carlisle will meet you at the clearing. Hurry Son." And then the call was over.
I'm so sick of this stupid bitch, damn it! I seriously can't wait to fuck her up. I don't care if she's a woman; she's dying tonight.
Once Edward made it back to the party, I had him and Emmett stay there to protect Bella and the people there in case Victoria tracked Bella down. We wouldn't want to leave them defenseless to a psychotic vampire. Rose and I took off to meet Carlisle, who directed us to her their scent paths. We followed them as quickly as we could, but we weren't getting any sight of them. I pushed my legs as hard as I could and soon enough we heard the tell-tell rustling and frantic footsteps of vampires on the run. Their scents came to an abrupt split and I sent Rose and Carlisle off together after Laurent and I continued after the scent that I now associated with hatred.
Her path was a ridiculous twisty-turny nonsensical one that was pissing me off. She was obviously trying to escape me, but I wasn't about to let that go down again. I didn't even know where I was anymore when suddenly I ran right into Rosalie, full speed. Confused, I helped her up off of her ass and then simply stared stupidly at her. "What the fuck?" I exclaimed, intelligently.
"What? I didn't see you!" She thought I was mad at her.
"No. Not that. Why are you here? Where'd she go?" How did this happen again?
"That's just what we were thinking, Jasper. Laurent's trail ended here too," Carlisle said, jogging back from somewhere down the road. Road? Damn it, we are on a road. I looked at Rose meaningfully.
"Looks like Firecrotch had a getaway driver again," She said, taking the words out of my mouth.
"Son of a fucking bitch!" I growled out in frustration, "I don't get how she keeps fucking getting away from me!" I was shaking in anger and thoroughly sickened at my own failure.
"Jazz, it's okay," Rose tried to comfort me. "No it's not!" I yelled. She recoiled. I felt bad.
"Sorry. I'm just tired of this. Just give me a minute, okay? Go back to the party. I'll meet you there in a minute and we can get everyone home." She nodded and ran off, Carlisle in tow.
I watched them retreat and the self-hatred began to encapsulate me. I'm Major Jasper Fucking Whitlock; how does this bitch keeping getting away! Damn it!
Right on cue, my phone rang. "What the fuck do you want Pete? Now is not the time to fuck with me," I warned.
He chuckled. "How does she keep getting away from you Major?" He taunted me.
"Fuck you Peter."
"I'm not fucking with you, I'm asking you a question. How does she keep getting away from you? Think about it." He sounded sincere.
"What are you talking about?"
"Well, how is it that she keeps evading you? You aren't an amateur. Surely you should've caught her by now, right?"
"Well, yeah. I guess." Is he trying to tell me I suck or what?
"Seems unnatural to me..."
It does...
No, really. How does she keep doing it?
Could she…
Does she…
Oh!
Well fuck me…
"Are you saying she has a gift Pete? Is that her gift? Evasion?"
"Ding, ding, ding! We have a winner!" Fuckin' asshole.
"So, a fucking escape artist is trying to kill my woman and you barely tell me about it now? What the fuck?"
"Kiss my ass Whitlock." Click.
Ugh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hate that man sometimes.
*
When I got back to the party I was ready to grab my girl and go. I don't know why my mind seems to be failing me so much lately; why I'm living in a delusion world where Bella is mine and I can be with her freely. All I know is that my delusions of marching in and taking Bella into my arms only to spend the night with her tiny body wrapped around me were thrown out the window when I walked in and saw her draped across Edward's lap in a fit of laughter.
Oh yeah. She's his. And you have a wife. Fucking dumbass.
Now, even more angry than before, I gathered up the troops and led them to the car. Me, Rose and Em had sobered up, but apparently Bella and Edward had continued drinking and seemed to be having a great time together. I would be lying if I said I didn't want to slap them; yes, both of them.
We were walking back to the car when she giggled adorably and said "I love your hat. It's so sexy!" Really? I mean, come the fuck on! She knows that hat belongs to me. How could she really be saying these words? She's not that fucking drunk!
I tried to hold it back, but the growl that left my throat was menacing. Thankfully Rose is my savior and grabbed Bella to ride up front with her while she drove us home. Apparently Bella would be staying at our house. Great.
Being exactly what he is, Edward sat bitch on the ride home. Which meant his drunken, oblivious ass was real close to getting his head ripped off. I mean, my fists were literally balled at my sides in an attempt not to end his life. Oh, how I loath his being.
By the time we got home I was in the worst mood ever. I needed to either kill something or fuck someone really, really roughly. And since the one person I wanted to fuck was walking hand in hand with Edward to his room and fucking her in this state would end up with her dead anyways, I made my way to the forest. I was hoping to kill enough time to miss their pansy ass make out session and kill enough pansy ass animals to cure my fucked up mood.
An hour later I couldn't possibly drink anymore, but I wasn't feeling any better. I fucking hated Victoria. I wanted to kick Peter's ass. I wanted to kill Edward. I wanted to shake some sense into Bella's inebriated ass. Oh, she would definitely be hearing it from me. Just because she was wrecked didn't mean she could act like this. Not cool. That shit was not gonna fly ever again. My girl didn't kiss other boys. My girl didn't say my hat looked sexy on someone else. My girl was gonna have some splainin' ta do!
When I finally made it home I figured Bella would be asleep and Edward, hopefully having sobered up, would realize how much he'd let loose and hate himself for being indecent. Idiot.
But I was wrong. It wasn't until I made it to my study that I realized that they were both still in his room, awake, sending off ridiculous amounts of lust. No. No, no, no; this is NOT fucking happening. She's not in there messing around with him. She knows I live here. She doesn't even fucking like him! Why? Why is she doing this to me?
The lust pouring from that room was intense, but I couldn't tell if it was one sided or not. Their drunken emotions blended together. And then I heard the sound of sloppy kisses and tearing fabric. The armrest I was gripping cracked under the force of my hands; I was trying not to go in there and steal her away from him. She's mine damn it! And why are there clothes coming off? What happened to the pansy pecking he usually gave her. Damn you Patron! Damn you to hell!
I grabbed my ipod off the desk and turned my headphones up as loud as they would go, trying to drown out the sound of MY GIRL in there getting frisky with MY BROTHER. I don't care that he was technically her boyfriend or that I technically had a wife; that girl is MY LIFE.
I kept the headphones on and tried to focus on anything but the emotions coming out of that room. I tried not to think about it. Maybe she was giving him one last night. But why was she taking it this far? Maybe she was just too drunk to realize what she was doing. But she was cognizant enough to recall the hat; surely she could recall our relationship. God damn it Bella!
When the lust level skyrocketed, I could no longer take it. I pulled the headphones out of my ears and made my way to Edward's room. I couldn't take it anymore. I was gonna take her away from there and then remind her who the fuck she belonged to. I reached for the doorknob, but the words I heard froze me. "I love you Bella," he said. "I love you too."
Yeah, that hurt. Bad.
"Have I told you how much I love the hat? So sexy," she said breathlessly. And then I heard the sounds of a creaking mattress. No. Please, no. Pleasure exploded around me, but couldn't replace the pain that was encompassing my body. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move.
A flash of pain. Lust and pain. Lust and pain.
"So tight." No.
"So warm." God no.
"So wet." Please, dear God no.
"I can't believe I waited so long for this." Just fucking kill me.
A moan.
A grunt.
A hiss.
Lust and pain and confusion and creaking.
"I love you."
Fuck this. I can't take this.
I pulled myself together and darted the fuck away from that room, still in denial. This shit just isn't happening.
Before I made it out of the door pain became the most prevalent. I still couldn't breathe. The pain was crippling me. I had to get out of here. Now. Right now. I used my gift to relieve the pain, taking it a step farther that I really needed to, but doing it for her. Seconds later there were two really satisfied people upstairs and I could move again.
"Thanks cowboy."
I slammed the door and sped off into the night. Once I was far enough I finally began to process what the fuck just happened. How could she do this? She was my girl. My life. And now, my life is over.
*
Four hours later I pulled my sorry ass off of the forest floor. I was done with the wallowing. I began to see red. Fuck feeling sorry for myself. I need to man up.
I called him. I didn't want to, but I needed to.
"Speak," he said when he picked up.
"I'm gonna kill her. I'm gonna fucking kill her Pete."
"No you're not." Wanna fucking bet asshole?
"Yes I am. I can't forgive her for this and I can't live without her. So I'm gonna kill her. And then maybe myself…" I was channeling my inner Edward, but it was true. My life was over.
"You'll forgive her." I laughed. "You will." I laughed harder.
"She fucked him Peter. In my house." It hurt to say it out loud. I still couldn't believe it. Bella gave herself to Edward. She was supposed to be mine and she gave herself away on a drunken night of stupidity.
Now Peter laughed. Think it's funny asshole? "So you think that my woman fucking my brother under my roof is funny? Would you like me to show you how it feels?" He growled. I'd crossed a line. Shit. "Fuck, you know I didn't mean that Pete."
"You're being a fucking dumb piece of shit right now. Man the fuck up Whitlock." I'm trying to.
"Pete…"
"Just, open your eyes a little bit, okay? Slow the fuck down and think. Don't make any rash ass decisions. Give her a chance to explain." Explain what? How my brother's dick ended up where it didn't belong? Please. I've heard it all before.
"But—"
"Just fucking trust me. And trust her. Shit. Fucking emo's, I swear." Click.
Really? That's all I get. Trust her? God damn it!
*
I'm an idiot; I know. I should be plotting their deaths, but instead here I am making my way to the house to give her a chance to explain. I'm a pussy.
When I got to the house, I smelled it. The scent should've brought out the warrior within me. I should've been ready to kill the bitch. But my girl fucked my brother last night and I didn't have it in me. Because I'm a pussy. And my life is over.
A/N: These guys are not mine... and I'm kinda glad. They're a bit dysfunctional, no?
It shouldn't be so long between updates this time, but the chapters also won't be as long.
Oh, BTW, I freakin LOVE you guys! Thanks for reading and reviewing... Makes me smile everytime!
Also, this time around, send me a review with your questions. I know there's a lot going on, so if you are confused about anything, ask away and I'll include whatever answers I can without giving anything away with the next update.