Disclaimer: I don't own 'Twilight.'

Chapter Twenty

EDWARD

"I'm so sorry, Edward," Alice says on the other line. "I knew she was seeing someone, but I didn't think it was anything serious."

"Yea," I say gruffly, taking a sip of my bourbon.

It'd been a week since I came to New York, five days since I'd last seen Bella. After the revelation things had become exceptionally awkward. We parted ways on uncertain terms. But I deserved it. I deserved all of it. I was a lucky bastard that she even agreed to meet me. I had to be content with just that.

But I wasn't. Because the girl I loved belonged to somebody else. And it was all my own doing.

"When do you think you'll be back?" she asks.

"Booked a flight for Friday night," I say, swirling the amber liquid in my glass.

"That's three days from now. What are you going to do in the meantime?"

"I don't know, Alice," I sigh. "How's Aunt Esme?" I ask, wanting to change the subject.

"She's good, though her favorite handyman has been gone over a week now."

"I'm sure she's fine without me," I chuckle.

"Anton tried to put up blinds in the Jensen house and he broke them. ALL of them, Edward."

I laugh. "Well, I'll be back to work fresh on Monday. I'll deal with it then."

"Okay."

A small pause ensues and I know Alice has something she wants to ask or say, but unless I prompt her she won't.

"What is it, Alice?"

"Did you tell her. Did you tell her that you love her."

"I did."

"And what did she say?"

"Nothing. Not that I expected her to."

She sighs. "I'm sorry, Edward."

I groan. "Look, Alice, I'm tired. Can I call you tomorrow?"

"Yea. Yea, of course."

...

I don't know what to do with myself. I spend my nights in my hotel room thinking of her. My days in Central Park thinking about her.

It's torture and I'm doing it to myself. Imagining her with him. He's probably a nice guy with a great job who treats her like a queen. And he gets to hold her at night. And kiss her. And touch her...And...And.

On my last night in New York, I hit a small pub downtown and have a couple of beers. A girl, Lacey, starts chatting with me. I buy her a drink, just to be polite, but when she suggests leaving with me, I turn her down and her mood gets sour. She leaves me alone once again. Which is fine by me.

I'm downing my third beer when my phone starts ringing. I pull it out of my pocket and look at the unfamiliar number before answering hesitantly.

"Edward?"

The air leaves my chest. It's Bella. And she sounds out of breath.

"Bella? What-"

"Do you want me, Edward?"

"What?"

"Do you want me?" she says louder. "Do you still want me?"

I get up from my stool and throw some bills on the bar top before heading out. "Bella, of course I want you. Jesus. Where are you?"

"I'm in Central Park, at the Alice in Wonderland statue. Come here."

"I'm on my way."

I take the next subway in that direction, but end up having to jog about a mile to get to Central Park. It takes me a while, and I have to ask a few people for directions. It's started drizzling, the temperature dropping. But finally, finally I see her. Bundled up in a black pea coat, scarf, and knitted cap. I hurry over to her and she finally sees me.

"Bella, it's freezing! What are you doing?"

"I don't know!" she cries, opening her arms out wide. "I don't know!"

It starts raining harder.

"Bella, this is crazy. Let's go somewhere inside."

She doesn't move, tears falling down her face. "No! I don't care! You're right, Edward, this is crazy! Us, we're crazy!

My heart plummets in my chest.

"But I don't care!" she says. "This is crazy and reckless and we're both so crazy and reckless, but I love you! And even though you're an incomparable asshole for everything you put me through, I'm going to be fucking selfish and demand that you don't leave me again! Because I deserve you! And no matter what you say, you are deserving of my love! I love you, Edward. I forgive you and I love you!"

As soon as the words leave her mouth, I wrap my arms around her and my mouth crashes down on hers. It's a frenzy of tongue and teeth and it's started pouring rain but neither of us cares. She's in my arms and we're kissing each other senseless in the freezing rain. And it's crazy and it's reckless and if there was such a thing as perfection, this would be it.