Hi there everyone! Sorry I've been gone for so long. I did say last time that I had finals when I last posted, but on the same week, I've been dealing with some internet issues leading me to rewrite or wait for it to turn back on (I use Google drive). But anyways, I'm back, I've graduated ( I'm free motherf*ckers!) and I'll now have plenty of time to write new chapters! Anyway, lets begin!
Dares and Randomness
"CAMPERS! REPORT TO THE DOCKS IMMEDIATELY!" Rayquaza shouted through the intercom as the campers rushed towards the docks.
-000-
"Great...now what'sss going to happen now?" muttered Shadin
-000-
The campers arrived to the docks where Rayquaza is, along with a boat that rested besides him.
"Welcome campers! Are you ready for the next challenge!?" shouted Rayquaza with enthusiasm.
"Well, somebody's in a good mood." said Cloud
"And you know that's not a good sign." replied M.P.S. causing the dragon legendary to frown.
"Watch it porkchop. Anyways, we have new contestants that are finally here today!" announced Rayquaza.
"Just tell us who it is already, you've already wasted our time with this crap the last few chapters." yawned Tyson
"No breaking the forth wall, but this time, we'll have three new contestants that will appear. The first of the new contestants is Drew!"
A Krookodile is the first Pokémon to walk out of the boat as he waved to everyone.
"Hi there, I'm Drew. It's really cool to meet you guys." he said as he looked at Kura, not noticing Tyson is watching him.
-000-
"This is going to be a pain... I can feel it." spoke Tyson
-000-
"Ok, the next contestant, I'm sure at least some of you know." Rayquaza continued "Everyone meet Carmen!"
"WHAT!?" shouted Dew as a beautiful Roserade sauntered her way off the boat causing most of the guys to stare and leaving some of the girls who are with them to knock them back to their senses.
"Why hello everyone, I'm Carmen." she said seductively, I hope that we will enjoy eachother's company." most of the guys fainted as she approached Dew.
"Why hello th-"
"Fuck off skank..." the otter growled as she almost everyone gasped even Carmen.
"Dew... we used to go out together, why are you're being mean to me?" she asked as she appears to be crying causing Ally to glare at him.
"Come on, she's faking it, even Laxish and M.P.S. knows about your act!" he yelled as he turned to them.
"I'm staying out of this one, but she is a deceiver." Laxish warned
"She is when she drives you to the point of nearly killing yourself." said M.P.S.
"Please don't tell anyone about that..." sighed Dew.
"Oh come on, you're just mad that I got you two eliminated and that I dumped you and your tiny penis.
"YOU'RE A FUCKING LIAR!" the three Pokémon yelled causing her to "cry" again.
-000-
"Ha! I can't believe those idiots fell for it." said Carmen smirking. "I won't lose this time, especially to that big...blue...sexy...DAMMIT! NOT AGAIN!"
-000-
"Never before I saw this side of Dew before, did I really make the right choice of being with him? " Ally asked before throwing up.
-000-
"And this is why I don't prefer any relationship, too much drama..." mumbled Grant
-000-
"She used me, my sister, lied to everyone, and used me as her "toy" of course I'm going to be pissed!" yelled Dew "Also, to counter that last comment she made..." * stands up before the camera cuts to static*
-000-
"Moving on... the last and final contestant is a returning contestant. Please welcome Sam!" he announced as an Absol ran off the boat.
"Sam!?" shouted Adelina as she and Rin towards the Absol.
"Daddy you're back!" cheered Rin as the three shared a hug causing mostly everyone to awe at the sight.
"Just like I said Ade, nothing will keep us apart." he said as he connected his muzzle with hers then turned to Rin. "I see you've grown too."
"Yep, I did. I even won a challenge too." the Igglybuff said happily.
"I saw, and the others too." Sam replied
"Wait what?" questioned the Leafeon
"Sorry to interrupt, but this is MY show!" yelled Rayquaza "By the way, Drew and Sam will be on the Floatzels while Carmen will join the Toxicroaks."
-000-
"We're back together again!" cheered Rin almost at the verge of tears. "I-I'm so happy."
-000-
"So, the sexy plant joins our team..." thought Omega "She'll be useful, but something seems...off"
-000-
"Awesome! I'm on the same team with the Umbreon!" cheered Drew "But something's up with that Scrafty. Maybe... nah."
-000-
"Now that the teams are settled, lets have some dares." he said enthusiastically causing some groans from a few of the campers.
"Shut up! Claws, go on a gem fast the entire day." said Rayquaza
"No problem..." the Sableye said as his eye twitched
"Weird... Grant and Bane, stop fighting or get punched in the balls by Yamir and Kai" said Rayquaza, before he knew it, the two started pushing eachother and began fighting.
"FALCON PUNCH!" a Blaziken shouted as he used Fire Punch punching Bane in the balls
"Walwein Punch!" A Beartic also came and hit Bane in the area. Even though he's an ice type, its still effective. The two began to leave as Kai and Dew looked at each other, and music randomly started playing.
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF TPII!
Dew! Vs... Kai! BEGIN!
Kai: Why the fuck I'm even wasting time with you?
I'm a badass, I do alot of the things you'll never do!
I beat you at your own game isn't it that something!?
I'll embarrass you like the old garbage you are, next to nothing!
I'm in the highest of the tier class anywhere possible while you're the weakest starter alive ha! You're just too stoppable.
Just go back to taking your viagra and getting used by bitches.
You ain't no fighting type so best wishes
You're sister is a Meowth right why am I not surprised
You're a half pussy who's fallen for some bitch addicted to lies
You're overcompensating over those swords you got
You're a broke dick bastard who'll lose easily to a Grass Knot!
*A Frenzy Plant randomly hits Dew as he came out surprisingly unscaved*
Dew: The reason you're so high up because of a little speed.
My seamitars and water to kick your ass is all I need
You know that I'm a true warrior motherfucker!
I've only been in two relationships during my run what you're talking about sucker!?
And the dick jokes really? Please you're just jealous that my giant sword was even lusted by a fucking Zweilous.
I don't flinch from a Fusion Bolt, and had beaten Keldeo while blindfolded
I have the sacred relics! From what your grandfather did you got more than scolded!
I don't know why they say you're calling me a pussy when you're nothing but a chicken shit who asshole is also his dick!
"I'm your chef who'll cut you into chicken on a stick!
*The music started to pick up pace as Kai's wrist flared up*
Kai: Tha Hi-jump kick from ma boy tha Torchic, sticks on you on the ground faster than a flick from a tick.
Devastation is known and boy its projected from tha top of ma dome and here you ya are tripping at the edge my throne.
You think ya types got me bending down ma knees, please, your soul shatters when tha bidoofs sneeze.
Dew: Yeah alright bud, sure types dont mean that much, but yo i put out blazes like you lunch.
So crunch, down if ya can swallow ma grand ol hand, diverse are ma skills but your fire is bland.
I can even stand hearing you spit on the beat, you think can critique what is simple unique? Your flows not even hot spewing outa sleeve, When i breath, i cleave homey i'm an inter-dimensional thief.
Damn right kfc for above you i stand, on the promised land with Arceus where your assassination is planned.
So step back before my spit does hit your face,cause itl hydro pump you all over the place!"
?: "WHO WON!? WHO'S NEXT!?
"Shut up Egridos!" screamed Rayquaza
"AW COME ON!" he yelled back as Kai disappeared
"Next dare! Static, get tied up to a tree and let Bella rape you" Rayquaza said before laughing
"WHAT!?" The Pikachu screamed as he's dragged away (somehow) by the Zubat
"O...k. Dew, how did you find Volcora's island." Rayquaza asked
-000-
"Ok, I know I'm a veteran here, but damn...Give others a chance will you!" screamed Dew at the camera
-000-
"Well, Morgan called and told me that this Poochyena she's seeing was abusing her. I noticed another island that's in the distance." he explained pointing to a distant island near the horizon. "By the way, she's still pissed at you Carmen." he said glaring at her.
:"I don't know why are you mean to me..." the Roserade said sadly
"Will you stop being mean to Carmen Dew? Sshe doesn't seem too bad." said Shadin
"I'm telling you she's evil!" he yelled as Carmen smirked
"Enough! Hey Ally, could you come here for a minute?" Rayquaza asked as the Lucario approached him, her eyes bugged out for a moment and she took a deep breath
"Everyone, I have an important announcement..." Ally began "I'm pregnant." everyone's jaw dropped.
-000-
*Carmen looks at the camera shocked*
-000-
"What...the...fuck!?" yelled Static
-000-
"I'm...I'm a dad!?" shouted Dew both shocked and happy.
-000-
*Kimmy's eye twitched*
-000-
"Ally thats great!" said Dew happily
"B-but, Bane is the father" she finished causing the Samurott to stop, his eye began to twitch.
"What?..." he said quietly looking at Bane
"Dew, within the next 20 seconds you can kill him, Kimmy can join too." said Rayquaza "Oh Grant, here's a video camera so you can relive the moment, but don't show emotion, got it" he finished giving Grant a camera.
"Wait, I didn't do anything!?" he shouted as Dew and Kimmy started beating the living shit out of him. Grant however is trying his best not to smile while filming the whole thing.
"Nice go to the infirmary to get checked... after you tell Dew the truth, Now for Laxish and M.P.S. kiss each other?" he asked taking a second look at the card.
"What hell no!" the two shouted
"Good enough, Tyson can you breakdance?" the Scrafty looked at him.
"Just because I'm a dark type you think I can breakdance?" Tyson asked irritated
"The card said it, not me." said Rayquaza shrugging
"Alright...fine" Tyson started breakdancing with no problem whatsoever.
"Nice-"
"Alright I have enough of this!" A voice shouted as Cobalion, Kyogre, and Latios appeared in front of everyone.
"What are you three doing here?" asked Rayquaza annoyed...
"Haven't you heard? We are Team Coconut, ready to lay waste of this pathetic island of yours!" announced Latios "And I still want revenge on you!"
"One, thats a stupid name, two what are you doing here Kyogre? I thought you knew better, Cobalion...you just suck and four you lost the bet fair and square! Its your fault you had to dress as a Flaffy!" Rayquaza shouted as everyone laughed.
"I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT THAT! I'M TALKING ABOUT HIM!" Latios said pointing at Dew as he and Kimmy were done beating Bane "You shot me in the fucking face on that Island!"
-000-
"I fucking hate this..." said Bane in a full body cast
-000-
"Ok, that was part of the challenge, and you locked me and the others in a cage in a different island." he said between pants"
"Enough already!" roared Cobalion "We're going to destroy you losers and this pathetic island!"
"Ok, this is the challenge..." said Rayquaza "KICK THEIR ASSES!" Everyone used their strongest attack on team Coconut. Out of nowhere, a blue flamethrower dropped from the sky causing a large explosion sending the three legends into the sky.
"Looks like we've failed again..." mumbled Cobalion
"Yeah, remind me why we even made this group?" asked Kyogre
"Don't ask me, we're the ass of every island here!" yelled Latios
"Will you two shut up!" shouted Angel, Shadin and Kitty as they were flying as well.
"Well it looks like Team Coconut is blasting off again!" the legendaries yelled as the six Pokemon disappeared as a star in the sky.
"Wow...triple elimination!" said Raquaza impressed. Ok, challenge's over! he roared as everyone went back to the cabins
Meanwhile
Static laid on the ground covered in...essence as a satisfied Bella layed on top of him
"fuck this show..." he said to himself on the verge of tears
Well that's it. Quite random and to me...lackluster, but hey, I'm back and I promise you that the next chapter will be better, So...yeah, triple elimination, tbh I forgot all about Kity and Angel so I thought its best for them to go. Also, I would like to thank my friend CelestialMoth for helping me with most of the rap, thats pretty cool of you if you're reading this. Now, is Ally going to have an egg? What mischief will Carmen cause, will Drew get Kura? Will Tyson stop him? Finf out next time on Total Pokemon Insane Island!
Next Chapter: A great surprise will be announced to the campers as they'll go on an item hunt!