"You know what I missed most about this world?"

"What's that?"

"The awesome power of Alchemy. I mean, how in the world did my old world survive without it? The easy to understand laws of Equivalent Exchange. The laws of equal input and output. The power at your disposal! Oh, the closest thing that world had was Chemistry, the science of understanding the makeup of matter!"

"You're still insane."

"I prefer the term mentally unstable."

"Psst! Hawkeye! Doesn't that girl with the General look like you-know-who?"

The blonde woman raised an eyebrow at the man across her. "You know we're not supposed to talk about the people he's dating."

"But-!"

"Havoc, do I need to remind you that she's dead? I saw her die. I was there." Riza sighed and pushed some hair behind her ear. "Besides, there's not really any way she could come here again. You know that."

Havoc looked deflated. "But ... she does look like the General, doesn't she? And the Chief finally looks happy."

"So, how's your team doing, Co- Oh, I almost did it again!" I laughed, my gaze shifting toward the two blondes. I gave them an evil grin.

"Even worse than before. Ever since Fuhrer Grumman named me as his successor, I ... are you even listening?" Roy cleared his throat.

I waved a hand. "Not one bit. They're staring at me." I chuckled, covering my mouth with my hand. "Probably going on how much I look like myself. Well, shouldn't you be getting back to work soon? I'm sure they're already suspicious that their beloved leader is going after an eerie look-alike."

"And when did you get this prim and proper attitude?" He raised an eyebrow.

I kicked him in the shin. "I've always had it, you moron! I just never felt the need to use it around you, you horse!" I stood up abruptly. "Hmph!" I Turning around, I stormed away.

It had only been two days since I came back to Amestris. Two days I've spent hunting for my beloved car. And two days of fruitless efforts. I had asked Hughes where it was, and he changed the matter to catching me up on the events of the past year. I had asked the Elrics, and they didn't know. I had even gone do far as to ask Winry, and I didn't see the gleam of her gearhead knowledge.

So the only people I haven't asked would be Mustang's team.

And after that display, I guess I had to finally toughen up and brave the horrors of the reformed military.

"Amestris Central Command. Please state your name, the person you need to talk to, and code."

I smirked. "I'd like to speak to Brigadier General Maes Hughes. This is Major General Clara Graves, and my code is Brother-Oliver-Jack-Sugar one-two-nine."

"That's impossible. Graves is dead."

"Then tell me why she's standing in a phone booth outside a cafe after a date with Brigadier General Roy Mustang." I countered, leaning against the booth wall. "Listen, I just want to be transferred to Hughes. Is that so damn hard to do, Bridget?"

"Please hold."

I scowled and hung up the phone with a slam. Phones were still unreliable. So therefore, I'm blowing my cover sky high and marching into HQ.

I entered HQ with an air of superiority. "Hello, Bridget. Do you remember me now?"

Instead of being greeted with a warm welcome, I was thrown right back out onto the pavement.

Hissing curses as Roy's laughter reached my ears, I straightened up. "Well, I to believe I should test out my new ... ah, toys. See you three later!" I beamed as Havoc and Hawkeye went inside. Roy gave me a questioning look, which I replied with an evil grin. "Go on ahead ... I've got my own methods to enter a military building. One nobody would expect of the all-powerful Imitation Alchemist. After all, they'd never think I'd do something completely original."

"Which would be?" He crossed his arms and raised an eyebrow.

I just grinned and crossed my arms. "Shouldn't you go and do your paperwork before you get in trouble with a certain hawk?" I stuck my tongue out.

"Didn't you want to talk some more about the Promised Day?"

I nodded. "Actually, I did. I want to know what really happened after I ... well, after the other me ... ugh! After Envy snapped my neck!"

That earned me some stares as I walked into HQ.

"Well, it is nice to be back in Central, but I would like to know what's happened since I've been gone." I smiled sweetly. "How about while you work? Or do I have to pester Falman while you're busy slacking off?"

"Actually, he hasn't had anything to do for the past month."

I turned around with a grin. "Hey, Hawkeye! I'm back from the dead. Did you miss m-"

"Roy!"

I turned with a scowl. "Hughes ..." I grumbled. "Where the hell is my precious Bonnie?"

He merely shrugged and grinned. "You know, I don't think that the lady at the desk is enjoying this little reunion. Let's go somewhere else."

And that somewhere else was Mustang's office. As Roy explained things to his subordinates, I talked to Falman about what happened to 'Father'. What I heard didn't make me feel good at all. Something had gone wrong with my plans and instead of rendering the Homunculus helpless, he had just vanished after he reabsorbed Greed.

"Well!" I clapped my hands together. "Looks like we still have some unfinished business to get to. I believe I'll need to borrow a phone for ... however long it takes to call the pipsqueak and his brother, and their teacher. I just hope that the technology in my world hasn't gone to waste."

"So what the hell is your plan?"

I heaved a sigh and held up my notebook, which was at the same page Alphonse had marked. "This. We're going to finish what was started a year and a half ago. You remember that Homunculus? You know, the one called 'Father'? Well, I have this bad feeling that my little plan didn't work as well as I hoped it did."

"Which was?" Izumi asked.

"As the guys here know, nobody can use alchemy in my world without a Stone. Once his stone was depleted enough, the circle should have activated and rendered him useless." I frowned and held up a finger. "But it didn't, did it? Instead of rendering him helpless, I have a theory that it took him to my world. I was using some unknown alchemy, so it is possible ..."

"You were what?" Alphonse asked.

"I honestly didn't think that it'd backfire like that. On the good side, he's out of this world. On the downside ..." I trailed off. "Dammit. I just gave him the perfect place to restore his stone."

"Would you start making sense, for once in your life?" Roy scowled.

I turned and gave him a glare. "I'm saying that I just gave him over seven billion souls to play God with." My voice was ice. "And I wanted some help taking him down, but if you're all too busy, I'll do it myself if I have to.

"So you're saying that you make a mistake and you want our help cleaning up your mess." Izumi crossed her arms.

"Short and condensed version." I replied. "If you could help, I'd appreciate it." I went to my notes and glanced at the circle. "So why didn't it work? Was my plan flawed, or was I just missing something? Or did I use the wrong circle? Hohenheim did say it should work ... so why didn't it work like it should? Was it because of my return, or ..."

"Whatever it was, you have my support."

I glanced up, then returned to my notes. "Thanks, Alphonse."

"If he's going, I'm coming, too. I may not be able to use alchemy, but I can still punch that Bastard in the face." Ed threw an air punch. "He needs to be taken down a level back to the ground."

"I am curious as to how your people get along without Alchemy." Izumi mused.

"Simple. Alchemy hasn't been used since the 1600's, and science has turned to technology. This really hit a spike around the 1900's, and has been advancing ever since. Like Alchemy here. When Hohenheim and that Homunculus-father thing went their separate ways, the alchemic knowledge of this world expanded. In a way, our worlds are very alike. Of course, there are lots of different things, most of which will take too much time to explain. So!" I clapped with a big grin, looking up. "Shall we get ready to traverse time and space into my world?"

"Hold on a minute, Krys."

I gave Roy another scowl. "Hurry it up, horse."

"You said that alchemy isn't possible to use in your world without a Stone, correct?" He crossed his arms.

I nodded slowly, realizing the flaw in my plan. "Oh, I get what you're pointing out! How could I have forgotten that important detail?! Man, am I scatterbrained or what!" I laughed, shaking my head. "Then let's plan on meeting back here in two hours ... or so."

As we parted, I heard footsteps behind me as I went on my way. I rolled my eyes with a sigh. "Why are you following me?"

"To make sure you're all right. I thought I saw stitches in your hair the other day, you know. Not to mention the bruises. Are you really expecting that you're going to go off and fight him alone?"

I stopped and turned around, nearly making him run into me. "That's nothing you need to worry about. I'll be fine." I let my gaze soften. "But it is nice to have someone worrying about me for once." I dared not speak it too loud, because if that reached certain ears ... I'd never hear the end of it.

Roy chuckled, shaking his head. "You're the strangest woman I've ever met."

"Not to mention fallen head over heels for." I smirked and turned around, walking toward Central Command. "On a different note, I am planning on heading to HQ. If I remember correctly, the basement shouldn't have been completely destroyed, and if my luck holds out ... We should have a few Stones in our party to aid us in the battle. Or is it the war? Great, now I've gotten myself confused!"

"How are we going to get there? It's not like any of us have ties in your world. And don't you need assistance getting into HQ?"

I shook my head. "Oh, ye of little faith, why dost thou doubtest me?" I sighed, then broke into snickers. "Oh, I couldn't resist! Worst case scenario: We go through my gate, since I'm the one with family there. And before you ask about the pi- er, Ed, I've got a theory about his Gate." I glanced up at HQ as I stopped.

"What's your plan to get into HQ, then?"

I grinned. "The old-fashioned way."

"Since when is this the old-fashioned way?"

"I asked why you doubt my plans, you idiot." I scoffed. "Now either turn around or I'll kick your ass into America without a way back. Oh, and you'll be surrounded by women and girls what will want to ... well, it won't be pretty for you."

He sighed and turned around. "And what the hell are you doing?"

"Using alchemy to change myself, you weakling." I cleared my throat and clapped my hands. "You did remember that I'm a skilled alchemist, right?"

"Weakling?" He turned around.

"Yes, Mustang. Now get out of my way." I ordered, jerking my head so half of my long hair covered my face. "And General Armstrong is still a Major General, right?"

He facepalmed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Lieutenant General now."

"Oh, right." I redid the stars. "How's that? An identical look-alike, Mustang?"

His eyes slid down to the sword sheathed at my side. "Eerily so."

I allowed a faint smile. "Then let's go, Mustang. With this rank, I doubt many will stop me."

"And how are you going to explain your presence in Central?"

"Easy. I'll lie."

"You're insane."

I chuckled, trying not to break my composure. "And you're just realizing that?"

"No."

"Good."

We made our way to the lower level without issues, and I grinned. "Yes! Just like I hoped! Now, where'd those wierd-ass dolls come from, anyway? Or do I have my locations wrong again? Oh, nope! I feel something up ahead!"

"Human Alchemy Detector."

"Useless moron."

"Zombie girl."

"Wet match."

He was silent for a while. "I have nothing."

I knelt to the ground and picked up a red stone. "Well, I was right. The tanks were smashed to pieces, and there are some stones left." I sighed, feeling the power course through my body. I longed to use it, to destroy that man's frail existence and make him join in my misery. "Here. You remember the last time I had one of these. I went beyond mad and nearly wiped the lab off the map. And killed Lust."

"How can I forget? I had to sear my wound shut while you went off into your own little world." He held out his hand.

I placed the stone in his palm, my fingers brushing his hand.

"Your fingers are ice cold."

"Yeah, yeah. I know. It's this annoying thing called poor circulation, and I hope it's not a sign that I'm taking after my Mom. She died from diabetes, and ... Well, I just hope I don't have it." I shook my head. "Come on, we don't have all day."

His other hand grabbed mine, effectively stopping my advance into the darkness. "Hold on a moment. Before we go farther, don't you think we should light up the place?"

"That would be a good idea, yes." I agreed. "But you're going to get cold, you know."

"I'm the Flame Alchemist, remember? And fire provides heat, doesn't it?"

"Point taken. Fire away, Flame." I pointed down the hallway.

He raised his free hand, clapped, and snapped. The hallway lit up, and with the Stone's power, the flames stayed in the hallway. "Better?" he asked.

I smiled with a nod. "Much better, Col- Ah, General." I chuckled and looked down the hallway. "I don't think that I'll be able to call you General, Colonel." I tried to take my hand from his.

"You'd better get used to it if you're staying here." His hand tightened around mine. "And you'd better not die again. I don't have another you to back me up."

I stopped in my tracks. "And I'm saying you'd better let go of me before I go insane and try to kill you like I tried to do with Lust. Are you trying to get Riza mad at both of us?" I finally freed my hand from his. "I know you're worried about me, but you don't need to worry. I promise that I won't die. If things look bad, I'll back out. Okay?"

He nodded slowly. "I'll keep you safe, too."

I fake punched his arm. "I'm not about to let any of you die," I stated.

He frowned and stared at me as I looked around. "Oh, there's another one!" I cheered.

"You're still the most insane person I've met." Roy chuckled and shook his head. "How about I handle them for now? Don't want you to go insane, now do I?"

"Depends on your definition of insanity. If you mean my usual behavior, then no. But if you're talking me going all murderous, then you're right. Even I classify that as insanity." I pointed out the stone, a bad feeling creeping its way into my gut. "Just don't you go insane on me now, okay? I don't think this is going to end well."

"And why would I go insane?"

"I don't know. I just got a bad feeling ... So maybe it's going to turn out fine." I shivered. "Let's just hurry up and get out of here. The sooner the better."

With little more conversation, I was finally free from that dark hole of a basement. "To be honest, I thought they would have cleaned up the place more than that. Did the Promised Day scare them off, or did the thought of more doll soldier things do that?"

"I think the fact that I warned them that your soul was trapped down there, waiting to haunt them did."

I gave him a deadly scowl. "I should have you court-martialed for that. And make sure Hughes doesn't try anything funny with it. But you should be thanking me, since I'm in a good mood today and I'm not feeling up to paperwork."

"Is this really what your world looks like?"

I frowned and shrugged. "Some days. You wouldn't know how the mountains change the weather around here. But I don't like how quiet it is ..."

"Yeah, it is fairly quiet. Didn't you say you lived in a valley with a lot of noise?" Ed asked.

"That's the problem with living close to the airport. Planes flying in and out all day and night, not to mention the noisy cars and things like that." I glanced up at the sky with concern. "Odd ... I was afraid of this. He now has control of over seven billion souls." I sighed and sat down with a sigh.

"Are you just going to give up like that?" Izumi snapped. "Just because he's now more powerful than he was in Amestris?!"

"Nope. I'm just going to sit here and let him come to us. If we make enough commotion, and if he's attuned to my world, he should notice us."

"What do you mean by that?" Ed asked. Someone nudged my back with their foot.

"Get up. You're in your hometown, right? Show us around, at least." Roy scowled at me.

I groaned as I got up. "Then let's go back to where I totaled my car."

"Totaled?" Al asked.

I looked westward, toward the highway I used. "Yeah, damaged the car. It would be more cost to fix it than the vehicle is worth. But with alchemy and the help of some of my mechanic's he- sunova ..." I trailed off, realizing that I had no family to talk to right now.

"You forgot you only have us, didn't you?" Ed chuckled. "Well, maybe some of Winry's gearhead rubbed off on me. Let's see what we can do to get you car running."

About two hours and a five mile walk later, I was staring at the tangled mess of twisted metal that used to be my car.

"And you want to get that ... uh ... is that even your car?" Izumi stared at it.

"Sadly, yes. I know it looks like ... well, raw material, but I've got know-how of my car. I've helped my dad many times to work on my car, and it can't be too hard to fix her this time." I clapped my hands together and placed them on what probably used to be the fender of my car. after a few seconds passed, I frowned. "Uh, this isn't working like I had hoped. Maybe if I add something to augment the reaction ..."

"Like blood." Ed made a face.

I snapped. "Exactly!" I looked around my poor car with a sigh. "Now, where's something sharp ...? Dammit, why do they have to make cars all safe and less likely to kill people than they did in Amestris?" I grumbled to myself as I finally found the remains of one of the tail lights.

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" Roy asked.

I looked up, blood oozing from a new cut on my palm. "Nope!" I grinned and clapped again, trying my hand at using alchemy.

As the metal slowly reformed to my car, I swear I could feel my head throbbing. The alchemists behind me seemed uneasy as I restored my car.

"And how are you going to start it?"

I turned around, silver stars flying past my vision. "Easy. It's my car, and if I remember correctly ... Ah-ha!" I pointed into the half-formed vehicle. "See that glinting purple mass? That would be the remains of my keychain. Looks like they're still in the ignition, thankfully. It looks like all they did was just move my car from there to here." I pointed south, then to the half-formed vehicle. As Roy shook his head, I clapped my hands again and fully restored the body of my car. Then I blacked out.

"Come on, wake up. Krystal, show me your eyes."

I groaned softly. "Uh ..." My eyes slowly opened. Four concerned faces were looking at me, one more closer than the others. Roy's onyx eyes were staring at me, relieved. "What ...? Oh ..." I trailed off with a weak chuckle.

"You passed out after you fixed your car. Are you sure you're okay?" Roy's arm wrapped around the back of my shoulders and helped me into a sitting position. "I know being back here might be hard for you, and you did suffer some sort of head wound. Maybe you should have taken someone else's car."

"Then risk the chance of having not one, but two people out to kill me? No. Besides, I liked my Bonnie. Now lemme look at the damage I did to my engine." I cautiously stood up, making sure I wasn't pushing myself.

Al cleared his throat. "You do realize you're bleeding from your head, right? You know, where you cut yourself 'killing' yourself."

"That would explain a lot." I reached inside and popped the hood. With ease, I pushed the lever up and pushed my hood up. "Oh. Well, if that's all. Just a damaged washer fluid reservoir." I let my hood close with a rattle of the busted grille.

"So ... what now? You said that a large transmutation would bring him, and it hasn't." Izumi crossed her arms. "What's your next plan, or do you even have one?"

"You wanted to see the sights of my homecity, right?" I smirked. "Then allow me to show you around the city of the Great Salt Lake, home of the second saltiest water mass on Earth."

A/N: Damn ... This has got to be the longest fiction I've made so far. But the good news: It's almost over. That's also the bad news.

For those of you who were interested in reading that little snippet of Clara's plan, I have more good news: She's making her debut when this is over! I haven't decided on a title yet, but she's coming soon to a story near you!

Okay, note to self: Less work, more sleep.