Astronaut:
(Prompt for anyone who wants it, since I don't feel that I'll do it justice. 'Amy's Glasses'.
This one is major AU. Basically just an excuse for some fun. Damn… I really am sadistic. Enjoy!)
Amy panics for a split second when she sees that spacesuit. There's something sinister about an Apollo 11 suit in the middle of a lake. Everything is sinister about an Apollo 11 suit in the middle of a lake.
He's talking to whoever is in it. She can't help but wonder who it is. Human? Alien? Robot? Mutated animal from the moon? She notices his slow, uncaring movements as he speaks. There's something off about the way he's acting. Almost like he's giving up.
He dips his head towards the ground.
What is he doing?
The green light blinds her vision as it escapes the astronaut's suit. She sees the Doctor's skeleton flash from a quick second, as the laser passes through him. The shot is fired again, and he's thrown to the ground.
She runs towards him, begging anyone who'd listen that this was just some sick nightmare. That he was never really shot. She's just dreaming and the Doctor is completely safe.
But no, the arms pulling her back are real enough.
When did she run forwards?
The muttered words.
"I'm sorry."
Those words are real enough. The stabbing pain in her chest, the tears in her eyes, are real enough.
His hands glow a shining gold that she's only seen once before. The day that he crashed into her backyard, fifteen years ago. He said he'd died before he met her. The light must mean… No.
He stands and the green light flashes again. This time, the Doctor doesn't get back up.
Rory and River let her go and she runs to his side. She hears shooting from behind her.
Good. Shoot it. Kill that horrible thing.
She's crying over his cold, cold corpse. He's not breathing. She doesn't feel his chest moving.
After all he's done for the universe, this can't be the end. Right?
The first blast feels like being dragged over a field of glass, while slowly being simmered over a fire. It's nothing new. Regenerating always feels like that. Nothing ever changes.
The second is less intense. He can still feel his skin burning under its heat. He can hear himself whimper as he drops to the ground.
He doesn't want to die so soon.
The cells in his hands die, and he can feel them freezing in his blood. This is what it always feels like before regeneration. He gets so cold. Then he burns.
And before he can even think, he feels the frozen blood melt under the bursts of heon energy. He feels each and every individual cell die and suffer in his body, until they're slowly manipulated into turning him into a completely different man.
"I'm sorry." He mutters, and then everything is fire. Nothing is cold anymore. It all burns. He wants to scream, but he can't bring himself to open his mouth.
Shouldn't living be less painful? Why does it always hurt so much to get another chance at life?
He hears the shot first. Then he sees it. He'll never feel the pain. Regeneration swamps everything else.
Goodbye.
He's aware of his back hitting the sand. He doesn't remember falling.
The fire is gone, and so is the cold. He's not even angry anymore.
He's not fire, ice, or rage anymore. What is left behind when everything you are goes?
"Sometimes I think a Time Lord lives too long."
How right he'd been. At least now he can stop running, right? For once, he'll be able to plant his feet in the ground.
It's easy to do that when you're six feet under.
He'll be able to stop running.
Where does a pile of ash go, anyway?
He can stop trying to fill the hole in his chest.
It'll fill with dirt, wherever he's buried.
He'll never visit Trenzalore.
Unless that's where he's left to rot.
He can sleep.
No one bothers a corpse. It is 'Rest In Peace' isn't it?
He closes his eyes. Something's running towards him. They're too late. Before they can come within ten feet of him, the last spark inside of him goes out. He'll never know that the universe cared about him and thanked him in the end. No one cared enough to show him.
He'll sleep forever, unknowing of the parts that he played in saving everything. Because he never really learned it, but people do care about him. He just never accepted it.
Now, he never will.
(Explanation time. It's an AU where the Doctor does die in 'An Impossible Astronaut/Wedding of River Song. No Teserecta to save him. River never created that alternate universe, and he's dead. Why is writing this kind of stuff my idea of fun?)