Star Wars: The Old Republic
Marr
~Chapter Nineteen~
I didn't know your value until I lost you.
The matron's revelation blindsided me. I stood mutely before the monitor waiting for the truth to germinate and take root but it wouldn't. It was a stubborn husk that wouldn't crack, seemingly content to languish untouched in the darkness.
Perhaps this was because I didn't want to nurture it. I didn't want it to grow and evolve. For the first time in my life, I felt genuine panic bloom in my chest.
I thought she understood what my life was and what it meant to share in it. No matter how many times I reminded her of the sacrifices she would be expected to make, she clung fiercely to the idea of our life together. She believed we could exist in a bubble, our world, separate from reality.
I wanted her in my world, but I alone understood the cost. She did not and now there was a child to consider.
A child…
I pressed the heel of my hand against my forehead and swore.
Fathering a child was not something I'd allowed myself to dwell upon. How could I be a guiding influence when I was away at war?
I was a soldier. My life belonged to the Empire and the Empire was absolute. In the end, I would lay down my life for her and she would not grieve. Another would step into my place and the cycle would continue until it didn't.
I'd seen the families of men like me—their resentful wives who had forged empty relationships with money or callow men or with other wives who were nothing more than a mirror held up to their own reality. Their children didn't look upon their fathers as men to be respected and emulated, but as rivals—hated as much or more than any other Sith.
I didn't want this. In a world where loyalty is the scarcest gem, I would hope to at least inspire it amongst my own. What use is an absent father?
Liaseph's image stared at me through the monitor with round watery eyes, pleading for an escape. Fear had become as intimate as breathing for her. It ruled her. It could be a useful tool if taught how to use it, but she had no such knowledge.
Her fear of losing me wasn't born of a selfish disquiet, but out of concern for the child. This was the calculation I'd sensed in her that night in the garden—the search for the perfect words, uttered at the perfect moment—the truth artfully hidden until the conditions were right to speak it. I had not allowed her those conditions. I'd been too consumed with my own concerns to entertain hers.
She feared to tell me and rightly so. I wasn't prepared and she would have misinterpreted my anger and contrition as being her fault. It wasn't.
None of this mattered. She was mine, and she carried my child. I had to find her and then I would be a husband and father.
"Resume playback."
Liaseph's lip edged up smugly. "Of course I knew. I did it on purpose."
The matron hurled Liaseph's underclothing at her. "Get dressed."
While the matron's back was turned, Liaseph secreted the surgical blade in the pleats of her dress.
"Three-One-Bee…inform Lord Bayliss of this development at once."
"As you decree, Matron." The droid bowed and sauntered out.
Liaseph remained rooted by the examination table, one hand clamped on the edge of it. Her jaw was set and her gaze tracked the matron's movements across the infirmary.
"Why are you standing there like a dolt? Get moving!" The matron barked.
"No."
"You dare defy me?" The matron advanced on her, arm raised and threatening a backhand.
Liaseph's eyes narrowed. "How dare you presume to command mein my own home? You're nothing here. Nothing."
"I'll see to it you never marry into any noble house."
"Good! I'd rather die first."
"Insolent little ingrate. You're not fit to lick filth off Malon's boots." The matron's habit shook with fury and her mouth clenched.
"You're vile and I hate you all!" Liaseph lunged at the matron and jabbed the blade into her shoulder.
The woman gasped. Blood streaked across her chest like a comet. Her eyes widened and she stared down at the wound. "You little demon! You stabbed me!" She squawked incredulously.
"I'll show you a demon!" Liaseph drove the blade at the growing stain.
"That's enough!" The matron snarled and caught her wrist, twisting it hard enough to crank her arm behind her back.
"Let go of me!"
The matron pried the blade from under her fingers. "Maybe now you'll do as you're told. I said move!"
Liaseph stomped her captor's foot and broke free.
The matron wailed. Her veil hung over her eyes and she ripped the offending material away.
Liaseph hurled jars of ointments and tinctures at the older woman and scampered backward to put distance between them.
"You'll pay for this," the matron warned, backing Liaseph into a corner.
"I pay for it every minute I'm stuck here with you." Liaseph padded down the trolley beside her, fingers blindly grasping for something she could use. Her gaze remained locked on her adversary.
Matron Alona advanced, blade in hand. Liaseph dodged the blow, earning herself enough time to seize a metal instrument tray to shield herself.
"That won't be enough to save you." The matron lunged and drove the blade through the tray. Liaseph gasped. The tip of the blade stopped just short of the space between her eyes.
"You missed," Liaseph goaded. She tugged the tray, twisting it this way and that, until she wrenched it away. The blade snapped and the matron stumbled backward, still clutching the sweaty useless handle.
She discarded the broken knife and launched herself at Liaseph. The two women traded blows, slapping and pummeling each other as they tumbled through the infirmary. Trays and trolleys flipped, steel implements clattering around them. The kolto tank shuddered on its base, the liquid inside sloshing over the rim. A shelving unit tipped, raining metal and supply canisters.
The matron clamped her hands around Liaseph's neck and squeezed, her teeth gritted with the effort.
Liaseph dug her nails into the woman's cheek, leaving behind four angry welts and the tip of one of her fingernails.
Matron Alona wailed. She clutched her face and then studied the blood staining her palm. "Savage!" She pushed herself to her knees and grabbed the edge of the exam table to stand.
Liaseph panted, her eyes wild as she fought to recover before her opponent did. She scrambled to her feet and snatched one of the few unbroken bottles of antiseptic from the overturned shelf. She uncorked it and shook it before pressing her thumb over the opening.
"I'm leaving," Liaseph muttered, giving the matron a wide berth as she passed.
The matron grabbed her hair and cranked hard. "I swear I'll tear it all out by the roots." The harder she struggled the more the matron tore at her scalp.
Liaseph cried out, tears welling in her eyes. She turned her head away as far as she could and sloshed the liquid back at the matron—a risk, given the angle. The liquid shot from the bottle, dousing the matron.
She shrieked and staggered backward, her habit askew. "My eyes! My face! It burns!"
Liaseph ran from the infirmary and didn't look back.
"Track Liaseph's movements—hallway—camera five," I barked. The monitor blurred and refocused as she fled down the hall. She froze halfway and yelped.
Duke Teraan blocked the passage. "You little fool! What have you done! You've ruined us all!" Lenaar peered out from behind their father and stepped forward to reveal herself fully.
Liaseph's hands balled into fists at her sides. "You told on me, didn't you? You swore you'd help me!"
"I'm sorry Li. I couldn't let you do it. The Sith are pure evil—I couldn't let you run off with one. You belong here, with us. I'm sorry."
"How could you? I trusted you!"
Lenaar pawed at her tears. "I didn't want you to die. Sith kill people like us."
Teraan tugged at his waistcoat. "At least Lenaar, here, has some sense."
Liaseph's shoulders drooped and her lower lip quivered. "I can't believe you'd do this to me, Lennie…I trusted you."
"Why didn't you tell me about the baby?"
"Why? So you could tell father about that too?" Liaseph crossed her arms. "Why would you betray me?"
"Don't accuse your sister of betrayal after what you did! Pregnant and by a Sith no less. Disgusting. I thought I raised you better than that."
"I told you, I'd rather die than marry Malon."
"You're in for a fate far worse than death," Teraan grunted. "You shamed me, and you will regret this for the rest of your life."
"I doubt that," Liaseph hissed.
"I tried to calm Malon after he found out…but Li…he wouldn't listen. He broke my tea service and left," Lenaar stammered.
"What do I care about your damn tea pot? This is my life we're talking about."
"Stop it, you're being selfish."
"Shut up, Lennie."
Teraan stalked toward Liaseph. "It's time I dealt with you."
"No. I'm leaving you both…and there isn't anything you can do about it!" Liaseph turned on her heel to leave and gasped.
Matron Alona blocked her escape and jabbed a syringe filled with orange liquid into her neck.
Liaseph dropped as if she'd been suddenly and violently deboned.
"Li!" Lenaar threw herself on the floor next to Liaseph.
"She'll live," The matron bit out. "It's only a tranquilizer."
"Thank you, Matron. This was all getting quite out of hand," Teraan said.
"The girl is a demon…look at my face! And look at my shoulder. She stabbed me!"
"I will do what I can to make amends with you and Lord Baliss both. For the time being, have the droid tend you, we'll discuss this later, you're dismissed."
The matron bowed grudgingly and left.
"What will happen to Li and the baby, father?"
"She wants to leave us so badly…I'll arrange it. Go to your room Lenaar. It's been a taxing day for all of us."
"Yes, father…"
After the girl disappeared up the stairs, Teraan stared down at the unconscious body of his youngest and shook his head. "What a waste."
He stepped over her and continued into another room.
"Track Teraan," I barked at the com.
The next location leapt onto the screen. Judging by the walls of books and the elaborately carved desk and padded chair behind it, this room served as the duke's study.
He paused long enough to pour himself a drink and downed it three gulps. He poured another with shaky hands and sipped at it before sitting at his desk.
The Duke clasped his forehead and allowed his hand to slide down the length of his face. He sighed and considered the holo images on his desk, one of each girl and the late wife, I presumed. He tapped the side of Liaseph's image and the likeness sank into the device.
He pivoted his chair to access the holocom behind him and after a few moments, presumably to search a frequency, he made the call.
"This is Duke Cedon Teraan. I need to speak with Borga Nil. I have a problem that requires his expertise."
A peculiar species of alien sprouted out of the holocom. Cat-like, but not Cathar, the alien was defined by large triangular ears and exaggerated tufted sideburns extending from the base of the ears to the lower jaw. He blinked down at Teraan with narrowed calculating eyes.
"Duke Teraan, to what do I owe this pleasure?"
"I have…I have…something…"
The alien leaned forward and stared into the duke's face and blinked, his almost lipless mouth coiling upwards. "Don't hold back Duke, what it is you have for me this time?"
"A girl…barely twenty."
"And is anyone going to be looking for this one? The last one had pesky attachments and it cost me. This had better be worth it."
"She is…let me show you. Transmitting image," Teraan tapped at his console.
"Why?" The alien snapped.
"She betrayed us…and her betrothed…and there is also the matter of a small problem now."
"How small?"
"No more than three weeks, I'm told."
"You do realize if I send my men for her, the deal is complete. There are no returns, no refunds, and no exchanges. You will not be able to change your mind."
"I realize."
"How much?"
"Twelve million."
The alien laughed. "She is a pretty little thing, but no…twelve million is too rich, given her little problem. It will need to be dealt with before she can be sold to the proper market. She's damaged. Six million."
"Ten…"
"Too much. Call again when you're ready to deal."
"No! Wait. Nine million. Nine. Do nine."
The alien picked at his tufty sideburns. "There is something about her eyes that I like…an innocence I want to see driven out. And there are some new augmentations I would like to try—genetic enhancements that will fetch me a better price for my investment. The auctions are so competitive these days, I need an advantage. I suppose I could go eight million, but not a credit more."
"Eight million…" Teraan mumbled. "All right. We are in agreement. Do you have men here? Or will there be a wait?"
"Not today. I don't want to risk you changing your mind. My men will be there within the hour to complete the deal.
"Thank you, Borga."
"No…thank you," the alien oozed.
The image fizzled and Teraan poured himself another drink. I watched him brood over the tumbler, and paused the recording.
"Identify Borga Nil."
"Borga Nil is a Zygerrian slave dealer and master of the Zygerrian underworld," the com replied.
"Show me every log and instance pertaining to Borga Nil. I want everything."
The com whirred and processed, finally ceasing the search five minutes later. "None found."
I bashed my fist against the console and swore. "Fast forward, track Liaseph—hallway, camera five, resume."
The Teraan protocol droid ushered in five mercenaries, four men, and a woman—all human. "This way, my lady, gentlemen, if you will," the droid chattered.
The men guffawed at the droid's pretentiousness and shoved the silver droid aside. The woman kept her distance and trailed behind the men, weapon in hand. The caution in her posture suggested she wasn't a mere thug. She carried her armor like a Mandalorian—perhaps one of their bounty hunters.
She watched the men in silence as they gathered around Liaseph's body like vultures at a carcass. Something about the woman troubled me—like an itch I knew I had but one I couldn't find to scratch.
The men turned Liaseph over and exchanged looks.
"Not bad…not bad at all."
"The Boss said she's damaged…too early to tell, though."
"What do you think, Chief?"
"Yeah, whaddya say?"
The group parted to let the woman in closer. She kicked Liaseph's foot and snorted. "These Alderaanian girls…farking frail as hell—weak-willed little snots. They'll go through her in under a year. Not much good for anythin' if you ask me. The Boss got ripped off."
"Think he'd mind if we sampled the goods?"
"Who's gonna tell 'im? Do whatever you want just don't mark her up. For eight mill, I reckon, he wants to keep her pretty. Transfer the credits to the droid and take her out. I don't wanna stay here any longer than I got to. Farkin' nobility…makes my skin crawl."
The pack burst into laughter and hauled Liaseph out of camera range.
"End playback."
I squashed down my fury and searched the castle for a blank data spike. I found one in Teraan's study and jammed the spike into his personal com. "Download all files, all security vids, now."
The deactivated holo display containing Liaseph's image caught my eye and I plucked the device from his desk. I activated the display and watched her miniature form pose—regally at first as if she were leading a receiving line and then she would preen and giggle as if trying to incite a game of chase, before reverting back to the original pose.
I watched the sequence repeat twice more before deactivating the device and dropping it into one of the reticules attached to my belt. After the download completed, I retrieved the spike.
Certain that I had taken all I could use to aid in my search, I strode through the halls of House Teraan for the last time. All that I'd witnessed and all that I'd done played in my mind in an endless loop, much like the holo display I'd stolen.
I had tortured her family to death, but I could not regret it. They deserved worse.
She was far away, I sensed that much and when I thought on the torments those cretins would inflict on her, the darkness writhed in me, hungry, impatient and murderous.
Every moment of rage I'd suffered in my life thus far, was but a candle to the nova boiling my blood at this moment. Restraint was an ideal I subscribed to—I preferred the cold logic of rational thought, but not this night.
This night, I would unleash the darkness and glut its appalling appetite. I threw my arms up and bellowed into the gloom.
"Feed!"
((to be continued…))